A/n: it has been forever and a day, forgive me but I'm trying to do this whole college thing and it's so time consuming, GREEK lied to me! So I'm the worst but I have easter break for the next three weeks and I'll try to get as much done whilst keeping it 'quality'.

"Hagrid," Hermione's voice was small and cautious as she tried not to upset the clearly distraught man, "How did the trial go?"

Hagrid sniffled loudly as he tried to pour tea, "Well, first everybody took turns discussing why we were there." Hagrid pulled out an abnormally large handkerchief and loudly blew his nose, if they'd been closer to shipping route and Kurt hadn't witnessed it for himself he might have mistaken the honking for that of a foghorn. Hagrid stammered on, from the way his voice caught, Kurt knew the news wasn't good, "Then I stood up and said my bit, told them that Buckbeak was a good hippogriff and he always kept his feathers nice and clean." Hagrid let his words hang in the air, not for drama as Kurt might do so but to catch his breath and steady his voice, "Then Lucius Malfoy stood up and said Buckbeak was a savage animal and asked for the worst."

"You've been sacked?" Ron asked.

Hagrid grabbed the cast iron kettle from the flames with his bare hands and dropped it in the same instance, spilling the boiling water all over the worn wooden floor of the hut; the man didn't cry out from the burns he'd suffered but from deep sorrow, "Buckbeak's been sentenced to death."

The words filled the room without being spoken particularly loudly, reverberating off the walls and echoing in each of their heads. Kurt took a deep breath and decided to say the second thing that came to his mind due to the inappropriate nature of the first in light of the sombre situation, "Surely, we can appeal the decision."

"We'll all work on it together this time," Harry assured Hagrid, "We'll keep at it till Buckbeak is proven innocent."

Kurt wanted to remind Harry that they were in the middle of their third year exams and that finding time for this conversation was a stretch; they wouldn't have the time to 'keep at' an appeal but Hagrid saved him the trouble, "They'll be executing him on Friday afternoon, there'll be no appeals."

Kurt looked at his friends; Hermione was distraught, while Harry and Ron were fuming. Hermione spoke in a voice that was less sturdy than before, "Then we'll stay with you."

"I don't want you seeing something like that," Hagrid protested, "Besides, Professor Dumbledore said he'd stay with me. A fine man Dumbledore."

"A fine man indeed," Kurt echoed subconsciously.

"Well," Hagrid sniffed loudly and wiped his eyes with the cuff of threadbare off colour shirt, "At least you're all getting along again."

The quartet was silent for a moment, unsure how to go on but it was clear that Hagrid was dealing with the situation by pushing it out of his mind. In an effort to accommodate the large man, Hermione chose to lead with a joke, "I think Harry and Ron timed it so we'd be on amicable terms during exam time."

"Oh no," Harry clutched his head dramatically, "We've been caught out, abort mission."

This earned a small chuckle from Hagrid but there was an underlying and lingering sadness that distinguished it from the gigantic man's normal hearty guffaw but it was definitely a step in the right direction.

"Mission aborted," Ron smiled with slight villainy that made Kurt almost proud, "Besides, Scabbers is missing again and you know what that means."

In an instant the mood of the room turned to one of exhaustion, "You've lost him again?" Harry groaned, less than impressed with his best friend, "You should consider getting him a leash."

"You really should be more careful with your things Ronald," Hermione scolded half-heartedly, "I thought Neville was supposed the forgetful one."

"Well," Ron stretched lazily, "Somebody fixed that."

"I don't appreciate that wording," Kurt chortled, "it makes me sound like some mad scientist who performed some morally dubious procedure on Neville."

"Wait a minute," Hermione held up her hands with a questioning look on her face, "You're telling me you aren't a mad scientist."

"No," Kurt gave her a pointed look, "Not even a sane one."

"Well," Hermione shrugged, "I'm just going to have to re-think this entire friendship."

"Haha, you're so funny," Kurt jeered bushy haired friend, "maybe you should take this act on the road."

"I'm sorry," Ron interjected, attempting to interrupt a staring contest that had broken out between Hermione and Kurt, "But I seem to remember this being about me and my missing rat."

"You know some species of animals go off into the wild to die alone," Kurt didn't break eye contact with Hermione even to address a matter as sensitive to Ron as this, "when their time comes they wonder into the wilderness and wait for death. I don't know if rats do it because they're rats and who wants to know anything about them and how they behave? Knowing they spread disease is more than enough for most."

"Kurt!" Hermione reprimanded without breaking eye contact, "sensitivity."

Kurt scoffed, "it's a rat. I'm sure our lives are much better without him."

"We made this person our friend," Harry sounded despondent as he came to this realisation, "out of all the other kids here, we picked this one."

"You had cash to burn and you knew I'm not one lightly returned," Kurt broke eye contact to give a sweeping condescending grin, "be happy, I'm high maintenance but you can look at me whenever you want."

"Firstly, I so won that staring contest," Hermione gloated, "Secondly, I really feel like setting you on fire right now- I think I finally understand the Salem Witch Hunts."

"Woah," Ron held his hands up in surrender, "That escalated quickly."

"Got so dark so fast," Harry shook his head.

"People lost their families," Kurt said, riding Ron and Harry's train of thought.

"Kurt gets to say insensitive and hurtful things all the time," Hermione screeched her defence at an octave so high only dogs could hear it.

"Kurt doesn't have a soul," Harry glumly shook his head.

"Plus there's that thing inside him," Ron said with a rigorous nod.

"New rule," Kurt held up an interjectory finger, "nobody talks about my contents; I don't want any mention of anything being inside of me from any of you. It sounds salacious coming from the rest of you."

There was a tense and awkward silence for a moment but Harry soon broke it, "So, what you're saying is that if one is from the house that currently holds the Quidditch Cup, one cannot discuss your contents… seems fair; Gryffindor has the cup and are champions while Slytherin gets to talk about what's inside you."

Kurt gave him a tight lipped smile as the room filled with laughter, "How's about; you can talk about my contents to your heart's content when you've smacked Draco Malfoy in the face."

The three smirked at him, "Challenge accepted."

~0~

"But Professor Dumbledore," Kurt pleaded with the headmaster, "Hagrid is distraught. Is there absolutely nothing we can do?"

Professor Dumbledore took a deep breath and stroked his long white beard as an obvious put on to show that he was currently engaged in profound contemplation, "At present there is nothing to be done."

"But there always something to be done," Kurt argued, "It's just that sometimes we're too involved in the situation to objectively see the possibilities, that's where hindsight comes into play but I don't think retrospective wisdom will do us any good in this situation."

"Let the course run," Professor Dumbledore reclined in his chair, "Time can only tell."

Kurt took a deep breath, "You know very well that under normal circumstances I would dismiss the matter and account it to the necessities of life and nature but… I'm afraid it might severely devastate Hagrid, his confidence in the classroom has suffered enough; all we had to do for the exam was feed lettuce to flobberworms. I need to be academically challenged."

"Young Kurt," The elderly wizard gave a small grin, "it is only when we relinquish control for the time being that we can truly achieve the results we desire."

"Be careful Professor," Kurt smirked, "your age is showing."

"Or is it your own age that troubles you?" Professor Dumbledore gave him a mischievous smile, "You are about to delve deep into your teenage years."

"I did that last year," Kurt shrugged, "fourteen is an insignificant age, although when one considers that left handed people generally live shorter lives and are more susceptible to autoimmune disease then it is quite possible that I'm having a quarter life crisis; fourteen and I've achieved so little, it's a wonder I'm not emotionally devastated as well." Kurt adjusted his hair, fixing a hair that was perfectly in place, "I know you have sway over the minister for magic, can't you convince him to pardon Buckbeak or possibly get a retrial; knowing that this trial went as I'd anticipated it to would allow me a certain piece of mind."

Professor Dumbledore leaned forward and nodded understandingly before reclining in his seat once more, "How have you been sleeping?"

"It's the middle of exams," Kurt furrowed his brow, "I've obviously been sleeping restlessly, not to mention that Sirius Black has broken into the castle twice and might possibly be hiding somewhere in the castle as we speak waiting to kill my friends." Kurt pursed his lips, "People keep saying there isn't a place safer than Hogwarts but I can think of a handful of places off the top of my head that don't have three headed dogs on the third floor, Giant snakes in the basement, man eating spiders in the back yard and don't keep getting broken into by dark lords, mass murderers and trolls."

"So you haven't been sleeping well?"

"No, I haven't been sleeping well," Kurt forgot to remove the condescending bite from his tone, "if you must know, I've been having awful dreams."

"Nightmares?"

"Nightmares insinuates that I'm afraid of them," Kurt scoffed, "they are nothing to be afraid of but are rather are unpleasant in nature."

"Would you care to elaborate?"

"Okay, you are pushing it," Kurt quirked a brow, "if you want to play psychiatrist then you're going to need a reclining couch, a suit and a less cool beard. Something more fastidious, keep the glasses though, mental health professionals never have normal spectacles."

"I suppose you believe yourself to be the b's and e's with your horn-rimmed spectacles a few decades too late,"

"They're the perfect complement to the formal look of sophistication and elegance that is consistent with my personal style," Kurt quirked a brow as if challenging the headmaster to argue differently.

"That's nice but are you going to tell me about your bad dreams or not?" Professor Dumbledore hadn't taken the bait as many of those whom he perceived as being intellectually inferior to him might have, it was refreshing to have his A-game brushed off as juvenile even if it was by somebody a hundred years his senior.

"Not," Kurt crossed his arms and decided to play this game a little differently, "you haven't earned the right to hear about my dreams."

~0~

Time had quickly gotten away from Kurt as exam after exam whizzed by, Kurt was not by all means exhausted but his bed was a little more crowded than he was used to these days. During the exam period he and Hermione were not just doubling up on time but rather tripling and some days quadrupling their study and preparation efforts which meant that Kurt had to do the same with his sleep. At any given time there were multiple Kurts milling about the castle hard at work: Studying with Hermione in the library; with Cedric in Greenhouse three; with Ron, Harry and Hermione in the great hall; or alone in the abandoned transfiguration classroom he called his own.

Due to his extensive and thorough study regime, sitting for the exams had been a dream and he'd Aced every one, that is until Defence Against the Dark Arts. Professor Lupin had forgone the traditional written examination in favour of a practical one because he believed that a theoretical knowledge was useless if one couldn't apply it in at least a pseudorealistic situation. Kurt wasn't upset so much that it was a practical exam but more the lack of warning on Professor Lupin part; add to the mix the fact that Kurt was still suspicious of Professor Remus "same name twice" Lupin's intentions and it made for a very anxious Kurt.

Kurt had approached the examination obstacle course with the same cold calculation that he did all scholastic tasks and, unsurprisingly, it went well; it was textbook stuff in a controlled environment, he might as well have been sitting at a desk and writing a theoretical exam because his wand was keeping time with his eidetic memory in much the same way a pen did. Kurt warded off hinkypunks with the slightest flick of his wand and was dominating the obstacle course with no help from his Order of the White Lotus training. In short, all was going well for Kurt until he came to the hollowed out remains of a tree where, upon stepping into the darkness Kurt had been emotionally devastated by what had been waiting for him.

It was only when Professor Lupin had found him curled in a foetal position at the feet of a tall, leanly sturdy, yet plainly beautiful woman that was chastising him and taunting him with jeers of his shortcomings that the reality of what was happening first hit him; it had happened when the woman had seized slinging insults at Kurt to transform into the same silver orb he had seen multiple times before that Kurt's mind realised it was a boggart. Though his mind knew now that it had not been real, his body would not respond accordingly; the tears kept coming and his long, slender frame stayed curled and he had to be carried and placed on the side lines next to an inconsolable Hermione.

"What happened to you?" the tears didn't stop but Kurt wasn't sobbing loudly like Hermione so for the most part his words were intelligible.

"I… it was Professor McGonagall," Hermione sounded distant and haunted, "she said I failed everything and was being expelled from Hogwarts and barred from the magical and muggle schooling system."

"Oh my god," Kurt gasped sitting up straight in utter shock, "That's awful."

"Then Professor Lupin told me I got a 'B'," she sobbed loudly, before consoling herself enough to speak once more, "What got you?"

"She was standing there in her charcoal pantsuit and white apron," Kurt's voice shuddered and the movement echoed through his body, "my mother, and she was just so disappointed in every decision I'd made; from choosing Hogwarts over Eton to the friends I've made and even Cedric."

"Oh," Hermione seemed to be sobering up, "that boggart was truly a nasty piece of work."

"Yes, the boggart," Kurt sneered, "Nasty indeed."

"I was never ready for that experience," Hermione pulled a tissue from her pocket and handed it to Kurt before grabbing one for herself.

Kurt wiped his face and spoke between gritted teeth, "I was never prepared."

"Are you feeling better Kurt?" Professor Lupin handed him his marked rubric and it had a big red 'B' on the top next to a less than satisfactory mark. Kurt couldn't tear his eyes from the piece of parchment before him, he had near perfect scores for a lot of the work covered in the obstacle course which was to be expected due to his near perfect recollection of everything he read.

It was then that Kurt had a sudden realisation, he knew the entire syllabus off by heart after studying it for thirty hours the previous day, "I'd like contest this mark."

"Now Kurt," Professor Lupin gave him a wry smile and placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder, "this is a very good mark, along with your course work it will make for a more than satisfactory final result."

Kurt scoffed, "I don't want a satisfactory result, I want an exemplary one and that's why I'm contesting Hermione's mark as well as my own."

"On what grounds?" the man gave a friendly smirk that reminded Kurt how handsome he was for his age.

"You obstructed our learning in order to prevent us from doing well in the exam," Kurt needed this win, he didn't like it when he worked hard on something and it didn't pan out. Maybe this win was what he needed in order to absolve himself of the loss of Buckbeak's trial which had been hanging over his head like a dark cloud, "you taught everyone how to defeat a boggart, yes, but not everyone was given the opportunity to face a boggart in class. The day of the boggart lesson you let everyone in the class have a try at facing the boggart except for Harry, Hermione and I."

"Kurt," Hermione interjected, "Harry faced his boggart fine enough, besides you're being rude and disrespecting teacher."

"Yes, Harry faced the boggart because he got to face it multiple time when Professor Lupin was giving him extra lessons on the Patronus charm," Kurt pointed out, "Harry's Boggart is a dementor, he practiced a NEWT Level spell on his fear." Kurt took a deep breath, "Everybody else knew what to expect when they saw the boggart, we were blindsided as if Professor Lupin had handed out that question from the exam to everybody but us; sure we know the work but we weren't ready for the work to be so personal and to hit so close to home."

"You earn that emerald and silver you wear like almost no one before you," Professor Lupin chortled, "in the same breath with which I congratulate you for staying true to the values of house, I must applaud you for watching out for your friends and must concede to your demands and exclude the boggart part of your exam from your final mark."

"Thank you Professor," Kurt let out a sigh of relief, he turned and smiled at Hermione before letting out a loud yawn, "I really needed that one. I think I'm going to sleep for the next fifteen hours."

"What about tomorrow's Divination exam?" Hermione was horror struck by the idea of slacking the day before an exam.

"Hermione," Kurt took a deep breath and sighed once more in defeat, "You have to know your limits and I am tired; we magically condensed about forty-five days into a couple of seconds during the course of the year. There may be no physical toll but I am mentally exhausted." Kurt was leading his best friend into the castle by hand, "Divination is a lost cause, we've tried everything and the highest mark we've achieved between the two of us was seventy-three. I bitched my way out of this 'B' and with the tutelage of Finn and Cedric I did better than I expected to in potions and transfiguration; besides, it's not like I was going to be first anyway."

"Oh, you are definitely exhausted," Hermione's eyes doubled in size out of shock, "you should really get to bed before you're accidently kind to someone."

Kurt chuckled, "or I complement your hair."

"Honey," Hermione shot him a condescending smile, "You're tired not dead."

"It'll happen someday for you," Kurt patted her shoulder with a matching air of condescent.

"Maybe in another time," Hermione sighed facetiously.

"Maybe in another country," Kurt completed the movie quote from their favourite movie.

~0~

Kurt gazed deeply into the Crystal Ball and hoped to see something he could report on, he'd managed to read the tea leaves only satisfactorily and he needed to perform well in order to even dream of a descent result but at this moment a 'B' seemed like a treat outside of his reach. All Kurt could see was his own beautiful reflection, he didn't mind looking at himself at all and in fact it was one of his favourite non-intellectually taxing pass time but now was the time to be taxing his mind down to the last morsel of knowledge he had; it was then that Kurt decided it was time to carry out his and Hermione's sinisterly devious plan, he had seen what an actual seer looked like in the beyond and he knew Professor Trelawney would drink up the dramatics and care less about what he said.

Kurt grabbed the crystal ball, rolled his eyes back into his skull, tilted his head toward the ceiling and let his shoulders begin to shake as if jolted by an electric current; when he spoke he lowered his voice to the point where it was barely a rumble, "I see, I see!"

Professor Trelawney smiled broadly, "Are you in the beyond? Your aura is pulsing my child."

"A handsome weather face before me," Kurt rumbled on like the aftermath of a thunder storm, "beware the one twice named."

"Child, you have reached the beyond and are finally seeing through your third eye," Professor Trelawney's tone was jubilatory, "Tell me all you see."

"He who shall most shame his mother must most fear the return," Kurt let his voice tremble on the word return, "for he who only five knew, soon four will remain but only those who saw shall know and only those that don't know shall speak." Kurt felt a pang of guilt, this was academically deplorable but not against the rules, "In three in four he will have to choose between two, the one unchosen will be left standing."

Kurt's voice broke on the last word and he hoped his acting had been sufficient to earn him a good mark, "What… Truly a reflection of my teaching prowess, I have pushed a student removed from the third sight to beyond."

"I was in the beyond?" Kurt feigned ignorance of his performance, the last bit in the stage production of Faker on the Roof had reminded him of how Brittany had just gone on as if nothing happened when she had delivered him with that pointless math problem.

"Oh yes, it was truly a phenomenon to behold," the woman's eyes opened wide and magnified to insectoid proportions behind her thick spectacles, "You score my fourth 'A' of the day, a true feat when one considers the currents run backwards." Kurt couldn't think of four people who came after him alphabetically who would score that high in divination but didn't protest, "the waters must be running clear in this spot because you are my second student of the day to reach the beyond, Mr Potter and I were in the beyond together."

"Harry Potter?" Kurt heard himself asking.

"Honestly," Professor Trelawney shot him a disapproving look, "how many Mr Potters do you know?"

"Just the one," Kurt grabbed his test script and shot to his feet, wondering what Harry had seen in the beyond if he'd truly been there; maybe knowing what to look for would make this subject more easily understood if he knew what the pinnacle of its academic principals looked like. Kurt stormed by Hermione with only a small nod, she knew that it meant faking the beyond with their preconceived prophecies was a go and that Professor Trelawney would fall for it.

"How did it go?" Ron slung an arm over Kurt's shoulders, "Let me guess, Professor Trelawney was not impressed."

"Au contraire mon ami," Kurt smirked.

"You know I don't speak French," Ron scowled.

Kurt waved the parchment with his result in front of Ron's nose, "I got an A."

"You?" Ron's eyeballs looked on the verge of falling out of his skull due to how wide his eyes shot open.

"Don't act surprised Ronald," Kurt gave him a playful swat on the shoulder, "I get A's all the time."

"Not in Divination you don't!" Ron stomped his foot like toddler throwing a tantrum, "How did you do it?"

"I faked being in the beyond," Kurt shrugged.

"You did what!?"

"Calm down," Kurt condescendingly patted his friend on the top of the head, "it's like faking an orgasm, everyone does it at least once."

"Orgasm," Ron looked to be having an angina attack, "Are you and Cedric?"

Kurt shuddered at the hand gesture Ron made, one hand hooped and the other slipping in and out of the ring, "Carole told me!" Kurt then crossed his arms indignantly and turned up his nose, "And if we were I wouldn't tell you."

"Who would you tell?" Ron frowned.

"Hermione," Kurt quirked a brow, "Carole, Maybe Finn? Definitely Harry in Parseltongue. Luna, Neville, Fred and George, Ginny and even your mother but not you."

"Why not me?" Ron whined, "We're like best friends, we're testicles."

"Pendulums," Kurt corrected, "you would over react and you can't keep a secret."

"I keep secrets all the time," Ron countered before dropping his voice to a whisper, "I haven't told anyone about that time in second year when we…"

"What did you two do Kurt?" Fred asked, appearing seemingly out of nowhere.

George appeared at his side, "Because I thought you only did things with Cedric."

"Or at least that's what you told George when he offered," Fred shook his head in disapproval.

"I even sent you a singing valentine of your favourite song," George protested.

Kurt smirked, "as I recall that was a practical joke and a very embarrassing one at that."

"But it's so us," George teased.

"Beauty," Fred pointed at George before turning to Kurt, "and the Beast."

Kurt started blinking in rapidly, it wasn't long before the successive blinking was joined by vibrating, Ron Scowled at his brothers, "You've broken my Kurt."

"'WE'?" George quirked a brow, "I'm not the one who called him beast."

"It was your idea," Fred shot back at his twin brother.

"My idea?" George squealed at an octave that made Kurt's ears ring, "if anyone's to blame it is Kurt."

"I'm to blame for you two coming over here to interrogate and insult me?" Kurt scoffed, "Do you know what happens when you fly too close to the sun?"

"You get covered in melted butter," The three Weasleys chorused with giant smiles.

"You get burned," Kurt smiled broadly before realising it wasn't his voice, Neville gave him a broad smile, "Never ask a wizard about the sun again."

Kurt giggled as his mind came back to him, "right, no science." Kurt pursed his lips, "what do you think the sun is?"

"You know everything and yet not even a little folk lore?" Neville chuckled.

"I… I have a boyfriend!" Kurt crossed his arms, "Besides, I don't have any obligation to know the ins and outs of wizarding folk lore because it isn't fact and it's not a subject requirement."

"You're a bitch," George scowled.

"Oh, I'm sorry but did we just meet?" Kurt raised a patronising brow, "Didn't think so, so don't present old facts as new findings; it's called plagiarism."

"Ooh, you're a sassy bitch," Fred smirked.

Ron and Kurt both moved to speak but Neville stepped forward, "He's Kurt Elizabeth Hummel, get used to it." The pair stared down at him, "Dismissed."

Kurt looked the boy up and down, he was impressed, "Confidence is a good colour on you."

Neville blushed brightly, "You're my person and you told me to bring you this," Neville chuckled,
"You said that you desperately needed your school bag before you went down to Hagrid's."

"Ah fuck," Hermione let out a defeated sigh as she came up behind him, "that's today."

Hope this keeps you satisfied.