A/n: Literally, this had to fit between the last and the next scene.
To whom it may concern,
I write this letter in two minds; I love you and want nothing more than to shout this from the rooftops for all hear, my other mind is more cautious. I have had a great love once before in this short life, the very circumstances that prevent me from pursuing my feelings for you were born the day my last love died. I hope you can understand how it is that I can feel like I've found in you the next great love of my life but still feel afraid to pursue any avenue with you.
I have known the ultimate loss; I wish I could say that Cedric left me for someone who was prettier, smarter or nicer but to know that he didn't leave me of his own volition is what hurts most. To know that the young man who loved me would still be by my side if he had the choice hurts. To think of you in the same manner devastates me. To have had and lost you would be too great a loss for my short existence.
In this moment, I face a Catch-22 in hindsight; If I had let things be, this would not be an issue. If I had let things play out as they wished, you would be mostly safe from the horror which I have cultivated. The main issue with that scenario is that I would be missing out on this love that has grown independently between the two of us. Am I expected to truly dwell on the past in this way? To regret actions that I know to be right? I sometimes believe that loving you is my punishment for interfering where I did not belong, that would be an easy way out. In reality, I know that our love is the ultimate reward.
What I mean to say is that I love you green eyes, I cannot deny this any longer. To love you may be my undoing but I have acted selflessly for far too long. Wont' you be mine?
Yours Always,
Kurt Elizabeth Hummel
P.S. I Love You.
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