Ch. 133
As far as plug-ins went, this one was far more easy than the beginnings of the cortical sessions he'd had to endure. Starscream enjoyed his puzzles, he did, but it was different solving one when you were one of the pieces on the table. Soundwave didn't seem to consider that. Or he didn't care. Regardless, this shared plug in with Optimus rather than the cold and calculating blue mech was far more standard: a somewhat dizzying tug, a light memory, and rest...
"Starscream?"
The seeker's optics were shut. He may have agreed to this but it didn't mean he still couldn't be petty. And he didn't want to cooperate right now. He'd been forced to test against the cortical patch sessions for too long.
"I know, and I am sorry for that."
Starscream frowned as he finally onlined his optics, "Am I really that open right now?"
Optimus smiled, "Your facial expressions share with me your discomforts. I deduced the rest of your feelings myself."
The seeker huffed and looked about the baseless, black void. There was a light upon the two, not unlike the indiscernible light from when Megatron had... well, he hadn't in this timeline yet, had he?
Starscream grumbled, "Well? Get this over with so I can get on with my 'training' regiments."
Optimus shook his helm, "Please, I do not wish to rush this. And given your clear emotional state, it is best that I take all of this with great caution."
"Are you going to tell me something I don't want or need to hear?"
"Perhaps," the Prime admitted, "but that will very well depend on how you receive it and how it is delivered."
Starscream scoffed, "So, proceed with caution at your own peril then."
Optimus nodded, "Indeed, I shall," he looked out into the void, humming, "May I ask for a change in scenery? This place is not where I imagined we would would talk."
"If we're just talking then what does it matter?"
"I am only asking. If it is a problem-"
The seeker growled, "It isn't, now stop," he focused, trying to mold the world around them into something familiar.
It came with great surprise to the silver mech when Starscream couldn't imagine more than dark walls and he scowled, crossing his arms tightly. But Optimus smiled softly and focused himself, adding shelves upon shelves of datapads and archives.
The Prime looked about their new confines and gestured Starscream to a desk, "I hope you do not mind that I configured your walls into a library."
The seeker took to a large chair at the desk, putting his peds up on the table to lean back, "From what I know, it's where you feel most comfortable."
Optimus nodded and sat across from him, "It was an endearing place. Not only was I able to find solitude to pursue my studies, but it offered great advice in the texts it protected when the words of my fellow bots were not quite what I needed."
"Optimus Prime: librarian," Starscream snorted, "That would make a box office hit, easy."
The Prime set his elbows on the desk, interlacing his servos together carefully; his smile remained everpresent, "If you believe it to be so, then so shall I."
The seeker finally growled and pulled his peds from the table, "Alright, I've had it. What do you want?"
"To simply spend time with you," Optimus admitted, "If this is something that you do not feel mutually comfortable with, then I can end this now."
Starscream frowned, "I... just don't know what you want. What is your motivation? What's the purpose of doing this?"
Optimus's servos pulled apart, "I worry for you. I wished to see with my own optics the progression in your mental healing process."
"Were Ratchet's notes not enough?"
"I trust Ratchet with everything he has ever said or done," the Prime said deeply, "but there is far more comfort within myself now, seeing you across from me with not a scratch on your mental state and the confidence back in your optics. Ratchet can tell me that you are healed, but seeing it does more for my own state of concern."
Starscream rolled his optics, "The care. The feels, as Miko puts it. The... Autobot sympathies."
"I cannot pity you, Starscream," Optimus rumbled, "I can find myself worried for you and what could happen, but I cannot pity you. I can empathize and do what I must to ensure that whatever future trials await you and those we stand beside will be met with our greatest strengths."
The seeker's optics narrowed and he huffed, "How do you do this every time? Your little speeches, your little pep talks, your capacity for understanding..."
"I am more than aware that my attention towards you is something you are both unfamiliar and uncomfortable with," Optimus sighed quietly, "but I will do whatever is necessary for any of my soldiers so that they may strive towards achieving their goals."
Starscream whined and leaned over the desk, gently beating his clenched servo against the metal, "The feels. The pep talks. Why do you do this? Why do you have to be that mech? The one everyone feels like they can go to?"
Optimus almost chuckled and leaned across the desk with him, taking the seeker's servo in his, "I have heard that most believe it is in my obligation as a Prime to be a beacon of hope and understanding. But that is not what a Prime is. A Prime is a reminder that all bots, no matter the paths they have chosen, can strive towards a brighter, more peaceful existence. A Prime serves as that path. There are no instructions for being a Prime and there are no instructions for being who you are. I view the label of 'Prime' as a title I must uphold with strength, dignity, respect and hope towards my fellow Cybertronians and all life throughout our universe, sentient or not. So whomever may ask of my wisdom has already taken the greatest of strengths within themselves to look for the answers that lie beyond what they know. I believe I serve as a guardian for the knowledge Primus wished for us all to remember and it gives me great hope when I see bots of all backgrounds striving to be what I had become, no matter what they believe a Prime to truly embody. Seeing them build to become more... that is what a Prime is. A model to remind all bots that they are all more than they appear."
Starscream stared at Optimus then whined louder, "Feels."
The Prime chuckled, "I am sorry you have been given such... feels, Starscream."
The smaller mech pulled his servo away, grumbling, "So... what are you going to try to give me while you're in here that will take care of Megatron? Knowledge on some of his bad habits? His weaknesses? Believe me, I used to obsess in his overthrow, there's very little about him that used to escape me. Now he's just insane."
Optimus's optics dimmed sadly, "Starscream... I am hurt by what he has become and I am saddened that you did not know the mech he used to be. He was a visionary that followed a blinded path... he was not this..."
Starscream fidgeted lightly, "... Then what do you want to do? Why are we in here?"
The Prime held out his servo, silently asking the seeker to take it again, and smiled when he did, "I am here to remind you that although I have... grounded you, I will always stand beside you and be there even when you are in your darkest hour. I need you to trust me. I know that is not something you freely extend to anyone and that is why I am asking of it. Please, Starscream, trust me, and open up your mind. Let it wander. I am going to leave a trap here, in your mind, so that if you ever feel you are lost, if ever you feel yourself stumbling, if ever you see yourself losing yourself, you will be protected and given the strength you need to save yourself. I need to know that I have done everything in my power to prepare you for any situation. In my capacity as your leader, Prime... and friend."
The seeker's optics widened and he stared hard at the mech before him. A friend. Optimus was the one admitting to it. Even Knockout didn't really have that kind of emotional clearance with Starscream and here Optimus was, asking for such a thing. A friend?
Starscream slowly nodded and shuttered his optics, trying to clear his mind and let it wander, "Alright, Optimus... I'll trust you."