Day 12

I've noticed something about these doctors that I find interesting. Now, I don't know if I'm the weird one or if they are, though whenever I ask that question the answer is usually I am. Still, their behavior feels strange to me.

You see, there's a storm outside right now as I write this. Thunder, lightning, wind, and pouring rain. I've always been acutely aware of what the weather is doing, probably because the shack didn't have windows. Every little thing blew straight into our house…including that blasted tornado.

Right now I'm huddled in my safe little room listening to the downpour outside, wondering if my friends have found shelter. The doctors however? They go about their business and pay no attention to the wrath of Mother Nature going on around them. That is weird, right?

I don't know what to do. I'm afraid to touch that blasted computer because it's plugged into the wall, and the lightning might strike something and electrocute me. I've also turned out the lights in my room to ensure nothing untoward. As I speak it's getting harder for me to see in order to write in my journal because I have to use the limited cloudy light from the window in order to see.

I hope this storm calms down soon. I hope my friends are safe. I also hope the rest of this facility turns out the lights so we don't get struck by lightning. If a tornado can blow down my house then anything can happen.

Grubber J. Gibberish

Day 13

Pain

Day 14

More pain…

Day 15

Uh…pain.

Day 16

Okay, I think I can make myself write today. For days now my bones have felt like they were on fire, and moving has become more difficult. I've spent every moment I can just lying in bed. For once I'm grateful to have this soft clean room to myself. I wouldn't want anyone else to see me like this.

I looked in the mirror yesterday, and I looked so pale. I looked like the color was slowly being drained from me. Even my eye stalks hurt! Maybe I should stop taking the pills…

No, if I tell the doctors, if I stop taking the pills, then the drug trial might end prematurely. The longer I stay, the more I'll get paid. The gang needs that money. Not to mention this could actually be me getting cured. I don't know anymore. I just know I can't quit now, not when everything depends on me being strong.

Oh, but I don't feel strong. I feel like termites are eating my bones. I just…can't get up. Need to stop writing now.

Day 17

I saw Dr. Phillips's sister today. She came over to visit Dr. Phillips. Her name is Sarah, and WOW was she hot! Makes me wish I didn't look and feel like death warmed over.

They were talking about Dr. Phillips's pregnancy and some other stuff I didn't pay attention to. I just sat there on the examination table and listened to them talk. Well, as much as I could listen. I was just trying not to move too much because of the pain I've been experiencing.

I'll admit, I must have been staring at Sarah too much, because finally she noticed me looking at her. She, um, must keep up with Townsville news, because, well…

"That young man looks familiar, Irene," Sarah said, "Is that your patient?"

"Yeah, and he's been a good boy today, haven't you Grubber?" Oh, I hate that syrupy voice she uses!

"Grubber?" Sarah repeated, "Grubber from The Gangreen Gang?"

"Maybe," Irene shrugged, surprisingly nonchalant about this, "He does have other green friends. They aren't here though. The board would only pay for one patient due to the length of the study."

"Irene, this is dangerous," Sarah tried to whisper, but I could totally hear her, "This kid is from a street gang. I don't just mean 'standing on the corner making fun of other people' street gang. I mean the kind we call The Powerpuff Girls on."

"Are you serious?" Irene said, her tone reflecting the word she used, "Sarah! This boy's dealing with severe physical impairment! No wonder his spinal structure has been so thoroughly compromised! You can't sic superheroes on every random criminal on the street. Grubber's just a child, and he's here fighting for his life right now."

Yeah, she really said that. I didn't know whether to be offended that she thought so little of me, or flattered that she thought so highly of me. No one has ever defended me like that, especially not when they knew my criminal background. Dr. Phillips treated my gang affiliation like an afterthought, and that just felt so weird to me. I'm used to not being seen as just me, but rather part of my gang. I prefer it that way honestly, but still…she stood up for me.

Sarah, of course, looked extremely uncomfortable that I could hear everything they were saying, and I did nothing to hide the fact that I was looking at them. Irene didn't even seem to notice me though, so focused was she on her hot sister. Sorry, I know Sarah is the judgmental one, but if you saw her you'd understand why I couldn't stop staring. I don't even know if they make bras in that size!

The pair of clucking hens eventually left the room to talk privately, and I don't know what they said, but I will admit the drama made me forget my back pain for a few minutes. Nothing like a good physical exam followed by a cat fight if you ask me.

Grubber J. Gribberish

Day 19

Okay, I know. I skipped yesterday's journal. So sue me, I couldn't move!

Well, actually, there was another reason. I have to figure out how to tell the doctors what happened, but I physically cannot figure out how. I can't bend myself upright to align my tongue anymore due to the pain, and yesterday I experienced a terrifying new symptom.

I went blind.

I…I can't explain it. It's like the lights just turned off. My eyes tried to adjust to catch any light they could, but there was nothing. Just darkness.

Not gonna lie, I've never been so scared in my life. I was afraid it was permanent, and I couldn't tell anyone what was happening. If I could have just stayed in my room with my misery everything would have been okay, but of course life is never easy. I know that better than most.

Dr. Langston came into the room to take me for my measuring and pigment chart records. I didn't know where he was, and while feeling around I accidentally scratched Langston in the face. My nails have grown rather long because I've been too nervous to bite them. I know, it's supposed to work the other way around. Shut up, imaginary critical voice. I know you're just a side effect of the medication.

My point is, Dr. Langston assumed I was attacking him and called for backup. I couldn't see, was flailing wildly, and now I had the goon squad to deal with. At least two or three burly men picked me up, and they took me to a table. I fought with them of course, so consumed was I with adrenaline and confusion. They jabbed a needle into my butt, and I think it was a sedative, because soon I fell asleep.

When I awoke, I could see again. I had to look at the calendar outside my room to make sure this was indeed my 19th day of captivity. I didn't care though, because I could actually see the calendar!

I don't know why I went blind, what fixed it, or if it will happen again. All I know is I need to tell someone this happened. Whoever is reading this report, please tell the doctors that I went blind and have been in tremendous pain. This can't be normal, and I'm scared.

Grubber J. Gribberish

Day 21

Yesterday the doctors adjusted the dosage of my medication. Apparently they really do read these reports I write. My guess is it's Dr. Langston reading them though, because Dr. Phillips hasn't mentioned the comments I made about her sister, or about her for that matter.

I feel a little better than I did before, but I still feel achy and tired. I also noticed a new symptom when I woke up this morning.

There's a clump of black hair on my pillow. At first I thought I had a new pet, but no, it's mine. My hair is falling out.

Frankly I can't even afford the mental energy it would take to freak out about this. I've gone blind, I've developed hunger pains akin to Big Billy, my bones have contorted to the point where I feel like I don't know my own body anymore, and my energy is gone. What's a little hair between friends?

Oh man, I must be losing my mind. I just called the doctors my friends! Well, they are the only people I've seen on a regular basis in nearly a month. Sometimes I feel like I'm back in Townsville Juvenile Correctional Facility. This bed feels nicer than those cots, and the lights are brighter, but the feeling of losing control over my life is the same.

I get up, I do what the doctors want when they want, and if I'm good I get a treat. It's slightly nicer than prison of course, but my life is still no longer my own. Lights out when they say, lights on when they say, and if I'm in pain that's tough cookies. I have to deal with it myself.

Maybe I'm just irritable because of the meds, but that's under their control too. When will I start seeing positive results? When will I get my money and get to go home? Is there even a home to go back to? Have they forgotten me?

That's the one thought that scares me more than anything else. More than the pills, more the the doctors, and more than going blind again…has the gang moved on? Arturo came to visit me once, but I haven't seen any of them since. Part of me knew it could happen, but what if they decided to forget about me?

I want to go home, but we don't have one. I want to get better, but I feel worse. I want to be free, but it's time for lights out.

Goodnight, I guess.

Grubber J. Gribberish

Day 22

Well, I've been moved to a new room. It was my fault I suppose, but I'm still mad about it.

After realizing yesterday how little control I've had over my life lately, I decided to take some of that control back in the only way I knew how…by trashing the place!

I felt better physically than I had in a while, but mentally I was still in a cage. Well, the best way to fix that was to make the place feel like home. I broke the computer, threw the drawers out of their sockets (or whatever its called), and ripped up my sheets and blanket.

Oh, my flurry of frivolous destruction was a thing of beauty! I even ripped some springs out of the mattresses, and tore pages out of the books on the shelf. It's not like I was reading those books anyway, so who cares?

Well, as it turns out, the medical staff cared. They saw what I did to my room, and they were furious. Well, Langston was furious. Phillips just pouted her lip and said she was disappointed in me. If she thinks I care what she thinks, think again!

What I do care about are these restraints. I am currently writing this journal entry with my toes, because my arms are in a straight jacket. So, forgive my lousy handwriting. It would be better, but I'm locked in a padded cell in a straight jacket like The Joker! And the worst part? Now I need to pee, but this room doesn't have a toilet like the last one!

Oh well, just one more surprise I can leave for my hosts…

DRUG TRIAL CLINICAL STUDY PROGRESS FORM (BOARD COPY)

Experimental Medication: Suprelitol

Name of Disease or Condition: Verida Pigmaplasia

Lead Physician: Dr. H. Langston

Length of Study: Indeterminate

Time Elasped: 22 days

Patient Name: Grubber Gribberish

Patient Age: 14-17 years approx.

Patient Sex: Male

Drug Effects: Bone structure resetting, growth of healthy melanin, improved posture.

Side Effects: Patient appears to be suffering from overactive digestive acid, violent mood swings, hair loss, and bouts of psychosis. Coughing appears to be an attempt to express pain from the spinal realignment, however this is the intended purpose of the drug and not a side effect.

Further Notes: I humbly urge the medical board of Townsville General Hospital to consider funding for additional test subjects. Grubber Gribberish is an advanced case that very well might not survive long enough for the current trial to give sufficient results. Suprelitol appears to be working well for the patient, restructuring his bones and causing his melanin to appear a more natural color. However, the patient's pre-trial disfigurement is quite alarming, and his mind appears to be sharp yet unstable. While Suprelitol is intended to repair malignant dead tissue in the brain of sufferers of the condition, results have yet to be seen. Dosage has been adjusted three times over the course of the trial thus far. Further research is needed, and security may have to be increased due to the patient's criminal tendencies and my assistant's recently announced pregnancy. The study continues.