"Gintosu, finish my sentence. Giant-"

"Cheeseburger!" Gintosu blurted. His brother stares at him. "We had cheeseburgers already." Gintosu shrugs. "Well, I want more."

"Is eating the only word you can think of?"

"No... I can say mega cake too." Ginharu sighs. "Chill with the sweets, don't be mega stupid." Gintosu pokes him. "Your Daddy is mega stupid."

"I already know that." The twins laugh. "Question. Which is better? Ninja's, or Assassin's?" Gintosu asked. "Ooh...Ninjass," Ginharu replied. "What? No. No-no-no. Assassins are better."

"Oi... Are you serious? You must have been smoking that crap Otose has been smoking. Ninjas are better."

"You must have been hitting Tsukuyo's pipe. Assassins are great! Ninjas suck!"

"No, they don't!"

"Yes, they do!"

The twins stood inside a store in the magazine section arguing. "Fine! We should change the subject." Ginharu picks up some comics while Gintosu grabs the candy. "Okay. I wonder if Mom and Dad will ever get together?" Gintosu asked. "I doubt that." Ginharu sighs. "I mean, don't get me wrong. Tsukuyo is a nice lady." He nods. "Yeah, when she's not drunk." The twins laugh. "It's just when I see him with her. It hurts a little." He pats his brother on the back. "I know. I'm so used to Mom being with Dad. Not Tsukuyo."

"Move over, you little brats." A man pushes them to the side to get magazines. "Hey! watch it, you old fart!" Ginharu shouted. "Who do you think you're pushing? You have no idea what we can do to you?" Gintosu asked. "Like I care."

"Why you..." Gintosu touches his weapon, but his brother stops him from releasing it. "Chill. He's not worth it, Gintosu. Besides, there are other ways to get him back, right?" The twins look at the woman standing next to them, then grins. Ginharu touches the lady's arm gently. She looks down at the twins. The boys point at the man standing next to them. The lady slapped the man across the face, and the twins fell to the ground laughing.

"Hey! Lady! What was that for?!"

"Pervert." She walks away. The twins laugh at him. "Dirty old man. Stop touching women. You should be ashamed of yourself," the twins said. The man got pissed. "Argh! It was you two. You little-" The twins pull out their weapons in a flash. The guy has a blade against his neck and another towards his stomach. "Just try us, and you will be looking at your intestines," Gintosu threatened. "H-How did minors like you get weapons? Swords are banned." They poke him with the blade. "Don't worry about it. Now back off, you fat ass doughboy." Ginharu scowls at him as he moves the blade closer to his neck. The man backed up slowly, then ran out of the store. The twins laugh.

"Wuss!" Ginharu shouted. Their sword automatically turns back into a regular short stick. "I love my sword," Gintosu said. "Yeah, too bad Dad won't let us keep it until our training is complete," Ginharu said. His brother groans. "We need to hurry, Gintosu. We're already late." They pick up their regular Manga and a lot of candy, then put them on the counter. "Is that all?" Ginharu asked. Gintosu looks around then his eye lands on an adult magazine. He smirks, then looks at his brother. Ginharu lifts his bangs to stare at him. "You better not."

"Don't be a wuss."

"I'm not." Ginharu sighed. "Sometimes you think like Dad." Gintosu pats his brother on the shoulder. "Isn't that a good thing?"

"No." Gintosu laughs. "You know you want to see it too..." Ginharu blushes while thinking it over. They look at each other while grinning.

Above Otose's shop, Gintoki is asleep on the couch with a jump manga covering his face. The doorbell rings. He heard it once but decided not to get up. As the door buzzed again, Gintoki complained while tossing in his sleep. The door buzzed multiple times with an annoying sound. He groans as he slowly walks towards the door. He opens it to see Hijikata dangling Gintosu and Ginharu by their yukata. Gintoki raises his eyebrow.

"Do these two belong to you?" Gintoki looks at them. "Nope, sorry. I have never seen these two in my whole life." He tries to close the door. "Dad! Stop!" Ginharu shouted. "Yes! We do belong to this old man," Gintosu pointed. "Cut the bullshit! I know these two are yours!"

"Oh yeah? With what proof?"

"Proof?! You idiot, can't you see the black and silver hair and the dead fish eyes these two have?"

"Yeah, so? What's that supposed to mean? Appearance doesn't mean anything. I have been through this before. It's the DNA that counts, Mayo." Hijikata pokes him, but Gintoki smacks his finger away. "DNA! MY ASS! I know these are your kids!" Gintoki yawns. "I don't know... Let me test them. Question number one, what is your Mom's name?" He asked the twins. "Uh... Mom?" The twins look at each other. "Is that it?" Gintosu asked. "I think so."

"Yeah, they're my kids. Get in here, you two." Hijikata put the kids down. "I didn't know Mom has a name," Gintosu said. "Me neither. I thought Mom's name was Mom," Ginharu responded. "Alright. What happened this time?"

"We didn't do anything!" Gintoki pinches their noses. "Stop lying!"

"This is what they did." Hijikata hands him an adult magazine. Gin raises his eyebrow. "What? Did they steal it?"

"No, they paid for it. Minors should not be reading stuff like this."

"And you shouldn't be giving people second-hand smoke." His brother nods. "The car was so smoky. Our lungs are on fire." Gintoki smacks the cigarette from Hijitaka's mouth. He got angry. "You motherfucker," he mumbled. "Neve smoke in front of my kids. I will kill you, and Sonata will kill me." Hiji groans. "Anyway, they slipped the magazine into their comic books, then handed the owner extra yens. It was for the magazine they paid for."

Gintoki whacks them upside the head with it. "You two thought you were slick, didn't you? As a responsible adult, I will take this and look-I mean, dispose of it." The twins roll their eyes. "Yeah, right."

"You are planning to stare at the half-naked woman in it," Gintosu said. "No. You read adult magazines." He shakes his head. "You're lying, Dad. There are no words. You are a perverted old man," Ginharu pointed. "You two are more perverted because you brought it."

"I'll let you handle this." Hijikata leaves. Gintoki closes the door. "Now, should I? Or should I not tell your momma?"

"You better not tell Mom," Ginharu scowls. "And if I do decide to snitch?"

"We will tell her you gave us the money for it!" The twins said. "Ha! She will never believe you. PAPA'S BROKE! HA-Ha! No money in these pockets! And I will never spend my last money on a magazine."

"You're always broke!"

"Not always. Now shut up, and let's go. It's time for practice."

An hour later, the twins are on the mat, breathing heavily. It's the sixth time today that they lost to Gintoki. He stood there waiting for them to get up. "You two need to do better than that."

"Damn... Why can't we take him down?" Gintosu asked. "We will never move on to sword fighting. We got to get this guy," Ginharu said. The twins stood up and got serious. Gintoki looks at them. "Ready for round 7?"

"We're ready!"

"Let's do this."

"Good. Now it's time to go, so get your stuff." Their mouth drop. "What?!" The Twins shouted. "Get your stuff. Your mother will be here soon."

"But we're just getting started..." Gintosu whined. "You two wasted so much time. No one told you to steal a magazine."

"We brought it!"

"Who cares! Time to go!"

"No... Just one more round," the twins pleaded. "Hey, you guys ready to go?" Sonata asked. They groaned. "Did you learn sword fighting today?"

"No! Dad is being a butt again," Ginharu said. "They took up their time trying to take me down. And the thing that happened earlier." Sonata looks up at Gintoki. "What happened earlier." Oh no, the adult magazine! The twins look at Gintoki. He grins as he stares down at them. He is going to snitch! He wouldn't dare! Wait! Yes, he would! "They were fooling around after school and came here late." The twins are relieved. Gintoki didn't snitch, but why? Sonata pouts. "Oh… Too bad. Get here on time tomorrow." She pats them on the head. The twins nod why wondering why did Gintoki stay quiet? Putting that thought on hold, they went back to the conversation. "Right, and we want a rematch right now!"

"Sorry... Try tomorrow." Gintoki and the twins started arguing while Sonata stood there sighing. She has had enough of this. "Shut the hell up! All three of you! Now let's go! Dinner is on the stove so move it now!" Gin and the boys grabbed their things, then ran out the door.

After dinner, the twins sat at the table, scowling at Gintoki. He notices something, then tips his jump manga down to look at them. "What is it?"

"We want a rematch," Gintosu said. "What rematch?" They point at him. "Don't what rematch us! You know what we're talking about," the twins said. "Oh yeah... That. Try tomorrow."

"No, now!" Gintoki sighed. "Begone. I'm busy." Gintoki waves them off. Gintosu and Ginharu glare at him, place their plates in the sink then leave the kitchen. Ten minutes later, the twins came back with wooden sticks in their hands. Gintoki is helping Sonata with the dishes. "That's not clean," she told him. He groans while scrubbing faster. He looks their way. "You two again? What now?"

"We want a rematch!"

"Didn't I say tomorrow?"

"No! NOW" The twins press a button and release a blade on their weapon. Gintoki takes the gloves off. "Go put those weapons back! You can't have those until you complete your sword training."

"One step at a time, starting now!" The twins were about to attack Gintoki until Sonata jumped in. "Wait a minute! Did you two put away everything made of glass?" They sighed. "Yes, Mom..."

"Are you sure? Did you put away the ornaments, the vases, picture frames?"

"Yes, Mom. We put away everything made of glass." She nods. "Lose the attitude, alright? I was checking. You three may fight now." When Sonata turns away to finish washing dishes, Ginharu thrusts his sword at Gintoki, but he misses and stabs a kitchen chair. Gintoki is standing by the refrigerator. "Damn, you are so slow. I moved ten seconds before you even lifted your weapon."

"Why you..." Gintosu ran over to Gintoki. He got ready to damage him with his weapon. Moving quickly, Gintoki turns, then grabs his katana. "Hey! Let's go, man..." He's trying to take his sword back. "Really? A sneak attack? That's all you two got?"

"AHHH!" Ginharu jumps onto Gintoki's back. They fell to the floor and rolled into the living room. Gintoki has the twins in a headlock. "Come on... Man," Ginharu said. "Yeah, let us go." The pair struggle to get free. "Sorry, but why should I?" Gintoki asked. "Stop playing, dad! We're serious," Ginharu said. "I'm serious too. Why do you think you two are struggling?"

"You are cheating! Like this!" When the twins pull Gintoki's hair, he releases them. "Hey! What did I say about pulling my hair?!" The twins saw their weapons and ran for them. After grabbing it, they stood up to face their father. Gintoki points his sword at them. The twins raise their eyebrows, then laugh.

"Really? A wooden sword?" Gintosu laughs. "What the hell is that thing going to do? Give us splinters?" Ginharu asked. The twins laugh at him again. "That can't cut anything, Dad." Gintoki raises his eyebrow, then moves his sword across their faces. The twins blink, then look at each other. Ginharu's bangs and Gintosu's ponytail falls to the floor. Their eyes widen.

"My bangs!"

"My ponytail!"

"You're asses!"

"What?" Whack! Whack! "Ouch..." The twins fell on the floor, rubbing their butts. "Heh, Lake Toya cuts through anything. And it makes a great ass-kicking tool." Gintoki fell to the floor when the twins grabbed his legs. He gets back up with his weapon and attacks them. The twins block his attack on time. "Good reflexes." The twins turn around and then kick Gintoki in the stomach. They jump on the couch, then jumps off. Using their elbow, they hit Gintoki in the face. He fell on his back. Gintoki opens his eyes, seeing weapons pointing at his face. "Now, one more time," Ginharu said. "Give us a rematch right now!" Gintosu shouted. Gintoki stares at them. "You two don't need a rematch. You already had one."

"Huh?"

"Congrats. You beat me in hand-to-hand combat. Now you two can move on to sword fighting." They smile. "Really?" Gintosu asked. "You're joking." The twins laugh. "Alright!" They gave each other a high five, then hugged their father. "You're awesome, Dad!" He smiles. "Tell me something I don't know."

"Thanks for not telling mom about the adult magazine."

"Don't worry about it. I will use it to blackmail you two with it soon." They got scared as Sonata walked into the living room. "What about this adult magazine?" Their eyes grew wide when they heard Sonata. "Answer me. Why would you two have an adult magazine?" She asked the twins. They look at Gintoki for help, but he looks away while rubbing the back of his neck. They might as well tell the truth. They pointed to Gintoki. "He gave us the money to get it for him, Mom!"

"Are you fucking serious?!" Gintoki shouted. He can't believe they are blaming him. "You gave us the money and told us to put it between the manga." The twins are like fuck it. He didn't help them, so Gintoki is going down with them. "I will never tell you to do that! Sonata, they are lying!" They pointed to Gintoki. "He is lying, Ma!" While Gintoki and the twins argued, Sonata sighed.