For the next three weeks, Bickslow was a mix of frustrated, angry, and miserable. They hadn't hadn't said a single word to each other in those three weeks, and it was partly because they'd both been going out on jobs just to avoid each other as much as possible. Bickslow didn't know what was going on in terms of them still being together or not and that was what frustrated him the most. He was angry that he still couldn't admit to her that he loved her, and he was miserable because he missed her, even though she was within an arm's reach.
But in those three weeks, Bickslow finally realised something that made him want to hit his head against a wall for being so stupid. His idea of one day, waking up one day to realise that he'd hopelessly and irrevocably fallen in love with her, was wrong. Sort of, at least. Of course, he'd wanted it to happen, and it had, and for a moment, Bickslow had been happy. But it was when it had happened. He'd realised something crucial about that.
It hadn't taken him nearly four months to realise he'd been falling in love with her and somehow missed it actually happening. It had taken him nearly four months to realise he'd been in love with her the entire time.
Of course, when he'd brought that up when they'd all been sitting on the train on route to their last job, Evergreen had shrieked again and Laxus had given him a look as if to say 'I could have told you that.' Bickslow was beginning to think that he had been the only one who didn't realise how he'd felt the entire time. Well, apart from Lucy, too.
But the fact that he'd finally completely come to terms with it all was irrelevant, because he still couldn't say it, and even if he could, Lucy didn't want to talk to him. She'd made that clear.
And when it comes to Bickslow's inability to say how he feels, it came down to something incredibly simple, and yet simultaneously stupid. For whatever reason, Bickslow saw finally saying those three little words as taking an incredibly big step towards an actual committed relationship. That wasn't to say he wasn't ready for it, because he was, and he'd really already been there and everything had been more than great. But somehow, the addition of love made everything more… real, almost.
Love scared the living hell out of him, and he'd avoided it his entire life – up until Lucy, that is.
And that was one of the key things that got him closer to being able to say it. It was Lucy. She'd been there through everything, she trusted him, and deep down, Bickslow knew that she loved him just as much as he did her. Because when he thought about Lucy, the entire stupid situation became a lot less scary. With Lucy, everything was always easy and everything would feel like it would be fine.
So by that point, the only things stopping him from actually saying those three little words were the facts that she really did not want to talk to him (as far as he saw, anyway), and Bickslow still had no idea what they were to each other anymore.
Lucy, on the other hand, was mostly just mad at herself. She realised she'd gone about the entire situation the wrong way. She shouldn't have put it all on Bickslow and she found it hard not to go up to him and apologise and just get back to the way things were. She missed him and his stupid jokes.
But Lucy wasn't going to back down. She would stand her ground, even if it just about killed her. She was going to wait for Bickslow to finally be able to talk about whatever it is he feels for her, because if they couldn't talk about it, then what were the chances of them going any further?
So that brought them up to Christmas. Laxus and the Raijinshuu were having dinner with the Strauss' (much to Laxus's dismay, or so he'd let everyone believe), and Lucy with her team at the guild.
And honestly, by that day, both Bickslow and Lucy had each reached a new level of miserable that all of their friends could see. It just sucked that Christmas coincided with what would technically mark four months of dating for them, if either of them knew what exactly they were doing at that moment.
Bickslow pulled at the collar of his button-down shirt as he waited for Mira and Lisanna to bring out everything for dinner. The two had insisted that no one move a muscle, including Elfman who was busy being attacked with a paper fan.
He didn't want to be there, not in the slightest. He was so close to running out of the Strauss' house and going straight to the guild just to tell Lucy how he actually felt. He didn't care that the rest of her team would be there (along with the rest of the guild), and he didn't care that he'd probably end up dead. He'd had enough of being miserable. He missed being happy and every day he'd missed Lucy more and more.
"So, I have a bit of an announcement," Mira chimed as she placed the plates down in front of everyone with the help of Lisanna, then took a seat next to Laxus who looked just about ready to walk out.
Laxus glanced towards the Seith mage opposite him and then back to Mira. Much like the rest of his team, he knew exactly how Bickslow felt and he'd be lying if he said that what was going on between him and Lucy wasn't driving him insane, because it kind of was. With that came the fact that Laxus knew his friend wasn't exactly going to take Mira's announcement too well.
"Mira, maybe we shouldn't…" he whispered in the eldest Strauss' ear.
She turned to face the Dragon Slayer with an aghast look, "Nonsense! Now is a good a time as ever!" She smiled to everyone on the table who all looked towards them eagerly, except Bickslow. "Well, Laxus and myself have been dating for quite some time now, and I thought it was time that we came out with it," she said with a smile, stifling a giggle as she gripped Laxus's hand under the table.
"Laxus is a man!" Elfman cheered.
"We already knew," Lisanna and Evergreen both said tiredly.
"Congratulations," Freed said.
Bickslow on the other hand, had just been in a sour mood all day and that had just made it worse. "Absolutely fucking awesome," he muttered, lifting his wine glass in the air before gulping it all down, much to everyone's horror. Everyone and their stupid happy couples. He had an inability to care about the fact that Laxus of all people had been in a secret relationship, and by the sound of it, longer than Bickslow had been.
"Bickslow?" Mira said quietly.
"Leave it," Laxus mumbled with a slight shake of his head. Because really, it was probably not a good idea to push it any further.
And dinner for the most part was in silence, just because of Bickslow and how uncomfortable he was making everyone else. So as everyone had their quiet conversations around him, Bickslow just sulked, pushing around the food on his full plate that he just didn't want to touch while everyone else was already onto dessert.
But Mira being Mira, well… She didn't like that and she was going to change it.
"So, Bickslow…" she began, forcing a polite smile for her rude guest. "Another year has passed, any more of a chance of you actually settling down one day?" Every year she asked the same question and every year the answer was the same.
But not that year.
There was a moment of silence after Laxus, Evergreen, and Freed had all dropped their forks on their plates as they looked between the Seith mage and the demon barmaid.
Bickslow continued staring down at his dinner plate for a few more moments, not really caring that everyone's eyes were on him.
Butt hen, as he dropped his own fork, he pushed his chair back and stood up slowly. "I can't do this anymore," he whispered. He was done. He couldn't wait any longer. He was either going to do it then or not do it at all, and if he didn't do it, he was going to have even less of a chance of getting Lucy back. He'd waited too long as it was.
They all stared as he walked out of the dining room and then the empty space he'd been as the front door slammed shut with his departure. It only took another minute for the rest of the Raijinshuu to realise what he'd meant.
"Oh, fuck. He's gonna get himself killed," Laxus muttered and they all scrambled up from their chairs, only bothering to give a rushed apology as they rushed outside.
And after a few glances at each other, the Strauss' soon followed, because after all, they had no idea what had just happened and they wanted to know.
Christmas at the guild was just an excuse for everyone to get more drunk than usual. Lucy, however, really had no interest in drinking, not when she realised it was going to make everything hurt even more.
It had nearly been a month since she'd last spoken to Bickslow and she was starting to think that his silence was his answer.
But she still had a little bit of hope left that what he'd said, he'd meant, all because she wanted to hear Bickslow say those three words, just so she could say them back and believe that everything would go back to the way it was and so she could be happy again. She knew she should have said it when she'd had the chance three weeks earlier, but she'd been too scared. She'd just wanted him to say it first.
She knew she loved him, and even though it had been a bit of a revelation to admit that to herself, she wanted to be with him. Bickslow had always been full of surprises, and she still wanted him to surprise her one more time before she lost the last bit of her hope.
It was all she wanted.
But it was Christmas, and Lucy was trying her best to be in a good mood, so she sat with her friends and watched them make fools of themselves. Cana was in the middle of a drinking game with the master and Macao. Gray and Natsu were in an eating contest for whatever reason, and Erza was, for once, eating her cake without any disturbances. Everyone else was having a good time, and that's what mattered.
"He's an idiot, Lu," Levy said with a small smile as Gajeel walked up with her on his shoulders.
"Damn straight he is," Gajeel muttered under his breath. They knew what had really happened between Lucy and Bickslow and they remained the only two to know. As far as everyone else was concerned, they were just avoiding each other for the sake of it because Bickslow refused to actually talk about what had happened. Gajeel had only found out because Lucy had told Levy, and even though Bickslow was one of his best friends, he wasn't going to start meddling, even though he really wanted to just because the two were hopeless.
Lucy sighed as an airy chuckle escaped, "Yeah, he is," she agreed. But he's an idiot that she fell in love with nonetheless. "Anyway, I might go see if Kinana needs any help, I'll see you around, guys," she said with a small smile and turned for the bar, not noticing the concerning look that the Dragon Slayer and Script mage gave each other as she made her way through the guild.
"You know we can't get involved, Gajeel."
"I know, Shrimp."
When Bickslow saw the guild doors in sight, he started jogging towards them. He was vaguely aware he'd had six people following him the entire time, but he didn't care. The only thing he cared about was Lucy and finally telling her how he felt.
As he pushed the large doors open, he paused, just for a second as he scoured over the guild, looking for the familiar blonde hair. And then he saw her, walking through the sea of people and towards the bar.
He didn't even bother with the small steps, just jumping over them all as he pushed past people who were in his way, ignoring their complaints as he did so. None of it mattered. He just needed to get to her.
There was a tap on Natsu's shoulder. "What is it?" he said around the mouthful of food, barely turning his head to see who it was.
"He's gonna tell her," Laxus said quietly.
And for a second, Natsu didn't know what he meant. That was until he turned to look at what Laxus was staring at, and as soon as he saw Bickslow practically running across the guild and towards Lucy with a determined look to him, he swallowed everything that was in his mouth. "Oh, shit," he croaked before turning back to face Gray to see if he'd paid attention to any of it, and thankfully, he was still busy with his face in a bowl of pasta.
Although Natsu didn't know how Lucy felt, he knew how Bickslow felt and he knew that Erza was their biggest problem, and honestly, it wasn't hard to figure out that whatever was about to happen was probably going to end with Bickslow's death. It was up to those who already knew about them to stop Erza from killing the guy, and that included Natsu.
So as the Dragon Slayers went back to silently observing, they moved around quietly, making sure they were close enough to Erza or Gray or anyone else who would completely flip out. Natsu could deal with Gray, should he decide to lose his cool, but Laxus and Gajeel would have to deal with Erza, should she look up from her cake.
And not too far away, Bickslow was finally standing in front of Lucy. In a split second, he was standing just a few inches from her with her face in his hands, staring down at the face he'd missed so much in the last three weeks. Before she could even form a word, he ducked down to press his lips to hers. As soon as he did so, she forgot about all of the people around them who were no doubt staring at them. Nothing else really mattered.
Bickslow pulled away after only a short moment, only because he wasn't there to kiss her. He could feel his heart beating a million miles an hour in his chest and how his throat was suddenly dry, but he didn't care. He needed to say it. "I love you, Cosplayer," he finally whispered.
Her breath caught as the tears instantly welled in her eyes, but they weren't because she was sad. She was happy. She was feeling more joy than she'd ever thought possible. He said it. He said it and he meant it. And she could see it on his face. Whether or not he'd meant it before didn't matter, because he'd meant it then, and that was all Lucy cared about.
She stood on her toes to reach up, her hands going to the side of his face as his dropped to her waist and she pulled him back down just so she could kiss him again. When she opened her mouth slightly, his tongue slipped past her lips to caress her own. She'd missed that, and she'd missed him. Was she crying in the middle of the guild? Yes. Was she making out with Bickslow in the middle of the guild? Also yes. Did she care about any of it? Nope. Not one bit. Because she was in love with Bickslow. She couldn't even care that Erza was in the room.
And when Lucy pulled back to wipe the tears from her face, she looked up with a smile that made Bickslow's heart absolutely melt. "I love you too," she whispered.
It was only when Erza noticed how silent it had gotten did she stand up and leave her cake on the table to see what everyone had been staring at.
She instantly dropped her fork. There was a part of her that wanted to run all two hundred of her swords straight through the Seith mage, but there was also a part of her that was putting all of the pieces together and was stopping herself from doing so. Bickslow was the one Lucy had been talking about. Bickslow was the one that had made her happy and made her feel like everything was fine. Bickslow was the one Lucy was in love with and needed help figuring it out.
It had always been Bickslow.
That wasn't to say that she still didn't want to run every single sword she owned through him, because she did. Just not as much as she usually did. She would hold herself back, just for now.
"I'm not gonna have to pin you to the ground, am I?" Laxus said as he folded his arms across his chest, coming to stand next to the Requip mage.
She turned to look at the blond Dragon Slayer who was watching her carefully, and then she looked around slowly. Natsu and Happy were holding Gray back as he tried to figure what the hell was going on while glancing over in her direction. Gajeel and Levy were standing just on her other side, with the other two members of the Raijinshuu just behind them.
She narrowed her eyes when she realised that they were all watching her and not Lucy or Bickslow. "You all knew?"
Natsu shrugged as he pulled Gray towards her. "Sorry, Erza. Sworn to secrecy."
"No wonder why…" Gray muttered as he pulled himself free from the Dragon Slayer and Exceed. It wasn't hard to figure out that they were worried about Erza's possible wrath, and they had a good reason to. She was a monster, honestly.
Erza sighed as she took a step forward, unfolding her arms, yet within a single step, she was on the floor as all three of the Dragon Slayers around her piled on top of her – as a precaution, of course.
"Get off me, you morons!" she shouted with her face pressed into the floor. Suddenly, all of the attention had been drawn from the couple in the middle of the guild to the pile of mages on the ground. Even Bickslow and Lucy were staring at them.
As soon as they'd roused Mira after she'd squealed and passed out (and she woke up with hearts in her eyes, no less), Bickslow and Lucy were sent to sit at the bar as the entire guild stared at them, most with eyebrows raised or slightly agape mouths.
The entire guild was confused and surprised. Mainly confused because the last time Bickslow had kissed anyone (also Lucy) in the guild, it had been passed off as a challenge. Surprised, on the other hand… Well, that was partly because Lucy had kissed him back that time, and then there was the issue that a few people had heard Bickslow just say he loved the girl, and that was definitely a shock considering Bickslow didn't date.
"Is this really necessary…" Bickslow mumbled as he shifted uncomfortably on the stool. He was usually fine with being in the spotlight, but this was something else.
"Yes," came the guild's united response.
Bickslow groaned as he dropped his hands to his face. "Why?" Why couldn't anything be simple?
And just like that, almost everyone in the guild decided to talk, apparently they all had something to say about it.
"Because it's weird," an unfamiliar voice said.
"When the hell did this even start?!" another shouted.
"I for one think it's kinda cute…" someone else added.
"Are you insane?" someone screamed.
"Hey! Lucy finally got a boyfriend!" Cana shouted from somewhere.
Lucy looked down more as her face went a bright. Trust Cana to blurt out the obvious.
Suddenly, Makarov had hopped onto the bar between Bickslow and Lucy with his hands up. "Alright you brats, how about you shut up and let them talk," he shouted over everything, instantly putting the room into silence.
When Bickslow looked around the room slowly, he realised that the fair majority were staring at him rather than Lucy, including his friends and even Erza and Gray. "What the fuck are you all staring at me for?"
Gajeel scoffed from where he stood with Levy on his shoulders again, "'Cause we're waitin' for you to talk."
"What the hell do you want me to say, then?!" Bickslow shouted back. And then, when everyone started whispering amongst themselves, he turned to face Lucy. "Would you get mad if I just got on the babies and left?" he mumbled.
"Yes," Lucy said quickly. There was no way she was going to be stuck by herself with a few hundred people who were trying to squeeze every detail about her relationship out of her.
Bickslow sighed as he leant back on the stool, rubbing a hand through his hair before resting his elbows on the bar. "Alright, lay it on me. I'll take whatever you fuckers throw at me. No secrets." Because I'm so done with this whole not talking thing.
And just like that, a million different questions were shouted at the two.
"You two? Really?!"
"Yes," Lucy replied with a slight smile.
"How long?"
"Four months, like, to the day, actually," Bickslow answered.
"You kept this a secret for four fucking months?!"
"Yes."
"Why?"
"…Didn't really feel like dying," he mumbled.
"Hey!" Erza shouted.
And on and on the questions went, ranging from ridiculously irrelevant to incredibly personal, and honestly, Bickslow had to draw the line somewhere, especially when Lucy decided to take all of the easy questions, leaving him with the stupid ones.
But Bickslow was beginning to get a headache from all of the questions directed at himself and Lucy. There were places he'd rather be and people he'd rather be with, and strangely enough, the guild and with a hundred people he mostly hated was not one of them.
He stood up from where he sat, his fingertips rubbing circles on his temples. "Alright, alright!" He shouted over them all, and they all stopped for the most part. "You're all giving me a fucking headache. Let's summarise, shall we?"
"Uh… Bickslow?" Lucy mumbled, though it went unheard. She had no idea what Bickslow was doing, and honestly, she was a little worried.
"Firstly, yes, we've been dating for the last four months, and yes we kept it hidden from most of you because you all have a tendency to overreact to shit like this." A few whispers and nods were heard and seen around the room as Bickslow looked over to Erza who was eternally scowling at him, "And Erza, you didn't know because I'm honestly fucking terrified of you and I didn't want to die, and I still don't."
"You would be dead if it weren't for Lucy," the Requip mage grumbled as she folded her arms.
Bickslow gestured to her while looking over the guild. "You see my point?" Then, he looked over to where Cana was sitting on another stool. "Secondly, Cana, this is kind of all your doing, because if your cards hadn't put us on that job months ago then I probably wouldn't be standing here saying any of this, so thank you, I guess?"
"Damn right it is!" she hollered.
"And thirdly." He pointed to Lucy who was still staring at him incredulously. "Yes, I am fucking in love with Lucy fucking Heartfilia and if any of you have a problem with that then you can go to hell, 'cause I really don't care what any of you think anyway."
"He loves her!" Happy snickered
And Bickslow meant every single of what he'd said. Sure, when he'd gone to the guild that night, he hadn't really intended to be standing there and saying any of that, but it was a small price to pay, really. He'd said what he needed to say to Lucy and that's all that mattered.
So as Gajeel and Levy's snickers could be heard over the slight whispers between the crowd, he finally turned back to Lucy. "Can please we go now?" he asked softly.
Lucy grinned as she hopped up from the stool before lacing her arm around his elbow and looking up. "Yes. Yes we can," she said as she giggled quietly.
"Thank fucking god., Bickslow said with his own chuckle as they walked through the guild and towards the door without a single care in the world. By that point, no one else's opinion mattered to them because they had each other again and really, that was all that they needed.
Telling Erza, Gray, and the rest of the guild were the last steps they'd had to take, and now that they'd done all of that they felt like a great weight had been lifted off their shoulders. Everyone knew and they could finally be free and be together without worrying about anyone else.
They could finally move forward.
So as they all watched the couple walk through the doors and out into the dark streets of Magnolia, Erza narrowed her eyes at the slowly closing door. "Wait, where are they going now?" she asked carefully.
Levy giggled as Gajeel put her back down to sit on a table. "Probably best you don't question that…"
And then all of the colour dropped from her face as she stared at the door in horror. "No!" she screamed, reaching out to run for the door, but within a second and after a quick glance to each other, Laxus and Gajeel had tackled her back to the ground.