Chapter 12:

Dursleys: Exonerated


"I have good news and bad news for you Mister and Misses Dursley." ICW Child Investigator Adams told the couple as he entered their interrogation room. "Harry Potter has emancipated himself and you are no longer his legal guardians."

The pair actually deflated in genuine relief as if a great burden had just been lifted from their shoulders. Then they hugged each other on the brink of tears.

"Wow, um. Even based on what we know about you two we didn't think you'd be that elated!" Adams said, taking his seat across from them.

"Are you kidding?!" Petunia said. "We can finally move out of that house with the blood curse on it!"

Okay! That sets off a different set of alarm bell! He made a note about checking their house for blood curses. But before he could ask for her to elaborate on that she and Vernon went on

"I can finally take that job transfer with the better pay!" Said Vernon. "And send Dudders to a better school!"

"We aren't prisoners in our own home anymore." Petunia said, this time actually in tears.

... uhuh. Clearly they hadn't done as much research into the life of Harry Potter and the Dursleys as they had thought.

"Why do you say you were prisoners in your own home?" Adam asked.

"Because whatever that Bumblebee guy did with my sister's blood couldn't transfer. And he made it very clear that if we broke that magic by moving your Death Eater assholes would come and do the kinds of things they did to my Lily and her friends." Petunia explained. "A week after we took the boy in his godmother was tortured into insanity."

"And she was one of your folks that we actually LIKED!" Vernon added. "Add to that his Godfather going on a killing spree trying to hunt down that rat man and we believed that bearded crackjob when he explained how threatened our lives were just by being related to the Potters."

These people personally knew the Longbottoms and Sirius Black? Rat man? Sister's blood? What the hell was Dumbledore doing to these people? Although, thinking back to that period just after Voldemort's defeat it DID make sense.

Blood wards were technically legal, but only because of how esoteric and powerful they are. But to put one on the home of Muggles seemed a bit extreme, until you recall they were put in charge of Harry Potter. It would be another two years of small skirmishes after that before the last of the Death Eater rings were dissolved but even by then nobody in their right mind would have considered it safe to bring Harry potter back into wizarding society. His time at Hogwarts had shown he it still wasn't safe.

The timeline he was building in his head made sense, and the measures it sounded like Dumbledore had taken seemed reasonable. But still. Imprisoning them in their own home with a blood ward? Any even simplified explanation of the cost and downsides of those wards, if they were what he suspected they were, would leave any Muggle family terrified.

"What of this rat man you mentioned?"

"His name was Peter something or other, Parker I think?" Petunia explained. "He could turn into a rat. Him and his friends, the werewolf, James and Black would play all sorts of pranks on us and liked to use him as their favorite stocking stuffer and whoopie cushion."

Peter Pettigrew was an animagi?! That wasn't in the British records. The only registered Animagi in Britain at that time was Minerva. The irony of her being a cat was not lost on him. He made a note to investigate that.

This family had things rough thanks to the wizarding world. That much was clear to see. Still, that did not excuse their treatment of the boy in their charge.

"Well, I also have bad news to share with you." Adam interrupted their hug. "You are being investigated for child abuse on the part of Harry Potter."

They both gave him a deadpan stare.

"Good luck with that one." Vernon said flippantly.

Adam blinked at the couple. He had never seen such confidence in a couple being investigated. Let's see if he could chip away at it.

"Concerning saint..." Adam looked at his clipboard.

"Brutus Secure Center for Incurably Criminal boys." Vernon finished for him.

"Yes. Concerning that. Is there a particular reason you've convinced everybody in your neighborhood and work that Harry Potter attends said school?"

"Because they already all believed him to be a thief, arsonist and animal abuser." Petunia answered.

"And why did they believe that?"

"Because he was." She answered simply.

Adam stared blankly at them. That was a damning accusation.

"Could you give me examples of such incidences?" Adam asked opening a new page in his notebook to specify investigations into records.

"Well, he always attacked dogs anytime he saw them. And your mind eraser people had to keep coming by to fix them and make their owners forget." Vernon explained. "Or give them new memories. Scary how you can do that."

"I'm sorry, what do you mean by attack?"

"He would change them." Petunia explained. "Like how you change objects into animals? He would turn them into black shaggy mutts. Big ones. He even used an incantation every time he did it. Pafoo or something like that."

Changing a dog's breed with wandless magic? That was powerful stuff. To do so accidentally once could be ignored, but this was apparently a regular occurrence?

"How many times did this happen?" Adam asked. "And from what ages?"

"Five or so times. It was within the first year of having him, so one and a half to two and a half." Petunia answered." Didn't he also transform a deer once?"

Vernon nodded.

"Yup. First and last camping trip we ever took him on." He answered. "He saw a doe, yelled "papa", turned it into a stag."

Adam did a double take.

"Like, fully transformed it into a male?" He clarified.

"Well, it was so spooked at the sudden appearance of antlers on its head that it scampered off before I could check to see if he gave the poor creature a full surgical add-a-dick-tomy, but probably." Vernon said.

Petunia smacked him playfully on the shoulder trying to hide her laughter at the play on words.

Adam added "James Potter, stag" and "Pafoo, black mangy dog" beneath "Peter Pettigrew, rat animagus." Wasn't Potter's Patronus a stag too? There must be a connection there. He also added "Transfiguration prodigy" under his notes on Harry Potter specifically.

"One or two incidents like that is normal for a wizarding child." Adam told them. "But the fact this happened so many times means young Harry Potter was exceptionally powerful and even a wizarding family would have struggled with him."

"You don't say?" Vernon said sarcastically.

Tired. These people were tired. Worn out by their experiences with magic. This isn't good.

"Now tell me about these arson incidents?"

"They mostly came in the form of night terrors at first." Petunia explained. "He was inconsolable, blowing holes into the walls and breaking windows. Occasionally lighting curtains and linen on fire. We had to keep an extinguisher in his room."

"Then came his first Christmas." Vernon chided in.

"Oh god!" Petunia moaned, sinking he head into her hands in despair. "I had blocked that out of my memory."

"What happened on his first Christmas with you?" He dared to ask.

"He went into a fit as soon as I turned on the Christmas lights in a big 'tada' moment." Vernon explained. "He lit the entire roof on fire and starting blowing chunks out of the ground. We all had to get away from him as he went ballistic. And the whole neighborhood saw it."

"He was chanting to himself in the fetal position." Petunia finished the story. "Abra kadabra. Over and over again."

By now Adam was slack jawed as he listened to their story.

"Avada Kedavra?" He clarified.

"Yes!" Vernon said, snapping his fingers. "That was it! We later figured out it was specifically green flashing lights that triggered him. And we went mostly green that year to match his eyes. Wanted to make him feel welcome."

"We noticed the trend of him breaking or making things disappear or lightning them on fire when the walk lights changed to green during our strolls." Petunia explained. "Often with neighbors or strangers around."

Adam felt the stress of their life flood him and he slouched into a double facepalm himself. Yeah, they would not be charging these people. They couldn't.

"That's exactly how we've felt for the past thirteen years." Vernon said. "And we had it far easier than he did."

"If we were prisoners in our own home, he was far moreso." Petunia said. "We couldn't take him on vacations with us. We couldn't even take him down to the local library he loved so much. He was on house arrest twenty-four seven, three six five."

"And then he started self isolating." Vernon added. "He would disappear, especially at night, and it was months before we found out that he was sneaking into the cupboard beneath the stairs to hide. Something about it made him feel safe."

"We eventually made it his own sanctuary." Petunia explained. "Took everything out, put a bed and... Vernon what did you do with the lock?"

Vernon smiled.

"Right! I convinced him that we put a magic lock on the outside. It was a fake lock, it doesn't work, but he believed it did!" Vernon said. "So, I explained to him that if he was ever scared, or having a night terror, the fairy in the lock would turn the room into his own vault. That he wouldn't be able to hurt anybody or break anything and nothing could come in and hurt him. And it worked!"

Adam was impressed. That was EXACTLY the kind of tactic wizarding parents used with children who had problems with accidental magic. To trick them to turn it into a force of good.

"By all appearances he never had a fit again." Petunia said. "But some days we would call him out to lunch and get no response. And we knew by checking the door that he was in there. That he couldn't hear us or us him. And nothing we did could open that door."

"Took a fire axe to it once." Vernon added. "It shattered like glass."

"We would spend all day in the hall outside of his sanctuary. Worried out of our minds. Checking the lock occasionally." Petunia went on. "We would always have a slice of treacle tart, his favorite, waiting for him or else a new toy. Which he would inevitably break."

Vernon smacked his forehead as if remembering something.

"Oh god! So many toys!" He muttered. "Anything electrical he got his hands on would break. Just stop working."

Adam nodded.

"Magic and electronics do not mix."

"Yeah, we caught onto that pretty early on." Vernon deadpanned. "Got him all wooden toys. A lot of board and card games too."

He got a nostalgic look on his face.

"Taught him math, calendars, the alphabet, and how to tell time with playing cards like my dad did for me." He said, then as an afterthought added. "He was great at games, except for chess. Kicked my butt at poker. I stopped playing with him when I realized he was changing the cards in his hand. The little cheat! I was so proud."

They just kept offering the information as it occurred to them, and he didn't need to be a master legilimens - which he was - to know they were telling the truth.

"We homeschool him until seven. By then we gave up on making him stay in the upstairs room and made the cupboard his room. It was at eight that we trusted him to be around other children and attend school." Petunia said. "Still had a few incidents after that. Turning teacher's hair blue. Teleporting on top of the school when Dudley and he fought - they do that a lot despite our best efforts - and then releasing that snake at the zoo."

"Then there was that time he levitated a cake and smashed it on your coworkers head." Petunia added as an afterthought. "In order to ground him we had to add the fake lock from the cupboard to his upstairs door and convince him into using his magic to seal him in."

"You forgot Marge." Vernon corrected.

"She REALLY earned that one. Even if he did go a little overboard." Petunia countered. "If he hadn't done that to her, I was seconds away from using my chair on her like a wrestling match for talking about my Lily like that."

Vernon grumbled but didn't disagree.

Adam closed his notebook. He'd heard enough.

"Did you ever put your hands on Harry James Potter?" He asked.

"No more than Dudley, and for similar reasons." Vernon admitted. "But we realized spanking just doesn't work pretty early on."

Adams nodded along.

"And did you give Harry James Potter a safe, loving home? Providing all of the necessities of life a child is entitled to?" He asked.

They looked at each other. Based on what they'd said so far

"We fed him. We clothed him. We sheltered him. We educated him." Vernon explained.

"But loved him?" Petunia clarified. "I can honestly say we tried. We tried SO hard to love him when he first arrived on our doorstep. But he wouldn't let us. And by the end of it, I think we well and truly hated us."

Vernon nodded to every word.

"And we have begun to hate him, and we don't want to do that. He is our nephew, but he never BELONGED with us." Vernon explained. "But near as we can tell, he also does not belong with you. He is under constant threat of life every second he is in your world."

"We hate you." Petunia added.

The matter-of-fact manner in which she declared these feelings made Adams flinch.

"You took my sister. Then you killed her along with our parents. Your world is sick. It had brought nothing but pain, fear, death, disenfranchisement and estrangement to me and my family." She elaborated. "We tried so hard to make him one of us, Muggles, but we couldn't. And now he is in your world forever. He is dead."


"Do you hate your cousin, Dudley?" The interviewer, Evelyn, asked him.

Dudley blinked at her.

"Doesn't everyone?" he asked. "I mean hate their cousins, not Harry in particular."

She wrote into her notebook.

"And why would you say you hate your cousin?"

"Well, he's more like a stepbrother. He's lived with us since I was two. He was never really a cousin to me." Dudley explained. "And we fight like brothers. Always have."

She nodded with every word.

"And what do you fight over?"

Dudley had to think on that. To really think on that.

"I'm not good with words, but I think we used to fight to mono.. monpo..."

"Monopoly?"

"Monopolize!" He said with pride. "We fought to monopolized mum and dad's attention. They always used to give him so much and me so little. I was a jealous child. And he was a... needy one."

The elderly woman, who he knew was a witch but whose kindly aura set him at ease.

"I remember him having lots of fits. And getting rewarded for it!" Dudley said. "I remember it making me so angry how he always got his favorite buy and a brand-new toy every time he wrecked the house. So, I started being bad too. And it worked!"

Boy had it worked! He'd become a sniveling brat and only now that he was in the boxing club with actual men around did he see how intolerable his behavior had been. He never knew how much he craved discipline, structure and a goal to work to. Shame he was still too overweight to join the wrestling club on top of the boxing.

"And what form did this fighting take?"

Dudley scoffed.

"I bullied him the way I could, he bullied me with his, um, magic." Dudley explained, uncomfortable saying the word. "And his wit. He was always smarter than me. And faster. We always kept it out of sight and earshot of mum and dad, but we fought constantly. I stopped around the time he started teleporting onto rooftops. But since he started going to that school there's one incident every year. Now I'm too scared of him to start any fights. And I don't feel the need anymore. I won. I have that monopoly on my parents now."

The interviewer made another note.

"Your parents didn't like you two fighting?" the interviewer asked, pushing the conversation ahead.

"Oh no! They didn't spank us often, only when they caught us fighting. I think they were trying to keep Harry from needing to use magic, especially in violence. And I was just ruining those plans every chance I got." He explained.

"Last question, then I'll let you go." She said preemptively. "Do you feel like your parents treated Harry fairly as his legal guardians? As parental figures?"

That time he really did laugh.

"Absolutely not!" Dudley howled. "I mean, they tried to. But he isn't happy there with us. We are like different aliens to each other. He never eats but loves to cook. He actively chose to sleep in a cupboard instead of the spare room. He breaks everything but is so considerate of others. Loves to fight but is super shy. I never got him."

Dudley thought on what he just said.

"I think the best way I could put it; is they weren't capable of being good parents to him. Any more than a family of cats could raise a monitor lizard." He summarized.

He realized how smart that sounded and felt pride at his recent improvement in academics... and social skills.

she hummed and finished writing whatever it was she was writing.

"Well. You may or may not be pleased to know that Harry Potter will never again live under your roof." She declared.

He was a picosecond away from panicking and coming to the conclusion that they had somehow killed him when she continued.

"He is now an emancipated adult. And I daresay he may never wish to see you again." Evalyn told him before getting up. "Your parents should be waiting for you in the lobby soon."

She exited the room, leaving Dudley to suffer a monsoon of conflicting emotions and the confusion they brought.


"I hate that I can't hate you for any of this." Investigator Adams said the moment he entered the room to join Albus and Evalyn.

"That would make three of us." Albus quipped back.

Evalyn sat beside him organizing all of the documents; incident reports, obliviating approvals, classified testimonies of witnesses and medical records in Privet Drive for the last thirteen years. It was a substantial collection. A collection only available for him to declassify for this investigation now that Harry was emancipated.

"How?" Adams eventually asked. "How is all of THIS possible?"

He picked up the incident report from Christmas 1982. It was the largest folder in the stack.

"Simple." Said Albus. "A perfect storm of protocols meant to keep Harry Potter safe, and necessarily anonymous, meant no one person was ever allowed to be fully aware of all going ons in Harry Potter's life."

"Right. Mandatory obliviation of any Aurors, mediwizards or investigators who ever came within two degrees of separation to Harry Potter." Evalyn summarized the standing order in her hand.

In order to qualify for certain security clearances Aurors, mediwitches and the like must consent to obliviation after any mission of a certain security level. They know before responding if it is one such mission and have to reconsent every time. Hence slow response time for many high profile individuals.

"It sounds to me like every individual incident was taken in a vacuum." Summarized Adams. "So each one was treated like a first time incident and no trend was ever established because nobody was allowed access to the information required to recognize the patterns."

"Indeed." said Albus. "Not even I, as Supreme Mugwump, could get complete access. And now we can see the fruit of what overzealous security measures have born."

Adams slammed his head on the table they were working on. Albus very much wanted to do the same.

"You are telling me, that a traumatized child, no, BABY who witnessed his parents murder and suffered a killing curse to the face was left with Muggle relatives incapable of providing him his needs as a wizarding child." He clarified. "And because of the constant, global threat to his life so many security measures were put in place to keep his whereabouts secret that nobody was capable of discerning that he needed serious and constant psychiatric help and supervision from a magical guardian due to his obscene power?"

Albus nodded.

"That about sums it up."

"There's no way in hell we can charge the Dursleys with anything." Evalyn concluded. "In fact, they are clearly owed remunerations... as is Potter."

"I'm glad you've come to see things my why, but I don't think either would appreciate that offer." Albus warned. "The Dursleys will want to just move on with their lives and to be left alone. Still, we should make the offer al the same."

He picked up the notebook beside Evalyn and choked on his hard candy at her observations. Once he coughed it up he broke down in uproarious laughter.

"It's amazing how many mysterious and altercations would have been solved or avoided if we simply asked the right people the right questions." He mumbled bemusedly. "For the truth can be hidden in the most unexpected places."

That the Dursleys of all people had been aware of Peter Pettigrews Animagus form would have been very useful to find out a year ago. If only somebody had thought to interrogate them about Sirius Black. How had none of them made the connection to ask the in laws of the man that made him a godfather?


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