I felt a light breeze caressing my face, and noticed a smell of campfire and army stew.
I let out a groan and opened my eyes. I was lying on a cot inside a tent.
I couldn't keep my eyes open for long, because of a splitting ache threatening to cleave my skull into two.
I heard a rustling noise, and then felt two cool hands on my face. "Miss Cat! Oh thank god, you're awake!" The worried voice was familiar to me. The feminine southern lilt soft and gentle. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew the voice belonged to someone named Tilly. Now if I could only remember where I knew her from.
Sleep pulled at me again. And I let it take me deep into unconsciousness again.
I woke up again when I heard birds chirping, and a soft light leaking through the tent's linen.
I opened my eyes, and saw I was still laying on the same cot. My gaze fell on a large figure, sitting slumped in a chair next to where I slept.
His face was pale, deep worry lines etched his features even in sleep. His beard was scruffy and longer than I'd seen it before.
Relief washed over me, seeing him here breathing and sleeping. He made it out. He was alive.
"Arthur..?" my throat was so dry, the word escaped like a rough croak.
His eyes flew open, looking around temporarily confused. When his gaze locked with mine, something so raw and visceral paced over his features, it nearly took my breath away.
He dropped down from the chair, sitting on his knees next to my bed. He grabbed my hand with one of his, and used the other to cup my face. "I was 'fraid you'd never wake up again.." he said hoarsely.
I wanted to ease that worry in his eyes a bit, so with a weak smile I said: "Well, I do like my sleep.."
He grinned, but it didn't reach his eyes. He closed them for a long second, and blew out a deep breath.
He stood up. "I'll get you some water, you must be thirstier than a horse after a race."
Before I could stop him he left the tent, and I was alone.
I took stock of my body. I felt stiff and my muscles ached. I remembered my injured leg, and my hand flew down to the wound.
I felt the rough lines of stitches criss crossing over the wound, but to my surprise I was able to touch it, without too much pain. I tried to lift it, and although it hurt a bit, it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be.
Arthur came back in and handed me a leather waterskin, and then sat back in his chair. I took it gratefully and poured delicious cold water down my throat
"How long have I been asleep for?"
"Almost one and a half weeks" he said, an emotion I couldn't place coating his voice.
My eyebrows rose up questioningly.
"Well, first, we had to get you back to camp. But we were still a few hours ride away. You were so restless, and runnin' a fever. So we gave you some of that stuff the Reverend uses, to keep you calm." Pain flashed over his features. "We brought in the doctor from Blackwater to treat you. And he gave you some more. To help with the pain, he said." Arthur stared blankly for a moment. "I was 'fraid we gave you too much. Cause you just wouldn't wake up." His voice broke a little.
In another effort to try and lighten his mood, I reached my hand out. He grabbed it, and pressed a kiss on the knuckles.
"Well.." I said, my grin a bit stronger after I had something to drink "I think we've learned I am even stubborn while unconscious."
He didn't return my smile this time, instead he looked at me and said "I am so sorry, Cat. I never should've brought you so far away from camp. So far away from the others, to keep you safe." His face earnest, no trace of his usual playfulness.
I frowned. "This is not your fault.. You know that right?"
Annoyance flashed his features, he let go of my hand quickly as if it burned him. " 'F course it is. I never should've brought you there. Never should've…"
"Never should've what?" I said, my voice sharp. I leaned upwards with my elbows supporting my weight, so I could look him in the eyes a bit better.
He ignored it and continued: "You even said so yourself!"
"What did I say? When?" I asked, confusion mixing with outrage. What was going on? He couldn't seriously be blaming himself now, could he?
"Don't pretend like you don't know what I am talking about, Cat. You said that you didn't want me there." His voice was raised now.
My frown deepened. "Arthur, what the hell are you talking about? I don't understand what is going on. This is not your…"
"Don't you dare tellin' me this ain't my fault, Miss Davis. While you and I know full well that it is.."
Miss Davis? Really?
"Mister Morgan, what the hell has gotten into you?"
He looked at me fiercely, but then deflated. "It doesn't matter anyway.. I've spoken to Dutch, and we discussed it would be better if Charles took care of your safety from now on. He will take you with him on huntin' trips. So you can continue learnin' to defend yourself."
I looked at him. Disbelieving. "Arthur…Why…?"
He pulled up one shoulder in a half shrug. "I'll be gone for the next few weeks. Dutch and some of the boys have already left on a job in Blackwater. I was to stay here until you woke up, and then join 'em in the city."
"Arthur.. Listen to me.." I said, trying to keep my annoyance in check. He was being ridiculous.
But before I could continue, he stood up and turned to walk out.
"Don't you dare to walk away now.." I was getting really angry. This had to stop. Now.
But he kept walking. "I hope you can find it in you to forgive me…" The words were a near whisper, laced with such sadness and finality it touched something deep inside me. Something fearful and panicked.
"Arthur… Don't leave.." I tried, my voice urgent.
But he did.
"Arthur, you fucking dick! Come back and talk to me." I flew my legs over the edge of my bed, trying to stand up to walk after him. But the sudden movement caused my head to spin.
"Arthur… No…" With the breath leaving my body, my voice missed the volume to reach out far.
I forced the spinning of my vision to slow. Took a few deep breaths and stood.
I stumbled my way out of the tent, and was just in time to see Arthur climb onto Beau's back. Our eyes locked. And I saw a flash of anger cross his face.
He got back down, and with ground eating strides made his way back to me. "What the hell are you doing out of bed? Go back inside, now!" His words an accusatory shout.
My chin jutted out stubbornly. "Not until we talk.."
"We did talk…" He said, a hint of something close to desperation now locking with the anger.
"No.. You asshole.. You talked.. And you didn't listen.."
He looked at me for a long moment, his breath ragged. He looked around, and let out an annoyed grunt. I did the same, and saw a small crowd of remaining camp members had gathered a few feet away, watching our fight. Karen even gave me a thumbs up.
He drew a hand over his face. "Goddamned busybodies. The lot of 'em.."' He murmured under his breath.
A giggle bubbled up in my throat.
He gave me a look that could kill. My giggle opened up into a laugh, and I flinched with pain. My ribs still weren't fully healed, it seemed.
His expression immediately turned worried. "You see now, I told you to go back to bed. You say that I never listen, but you act like you've got two ears on the side of your head purely for decorational purposes!"
"I'll go back to bed, as soon as you promise to follow me. And sit your ass into that chair, so we can talk.."
The playful glint I had been missing so much, turned his features boyish when he said: "And what are you gonna do if I were just to turn around and leave, Miss Davis? Stumble all the way to Blackwater to yell at me there?"
"Don't tempt me, mister Morgan. Because you and I both know I will."
For the first time since I'd woken up a real grin spread across his face. "As fun as that sounds, I'm worried if you do that'd be the last time I can hear you call me an asshole. And that would be a real shame, Miss."
Before I could say anything else, he gently picked me up and brought me back to my bed. After he carefully laid me down, he dropped down in the chair.
Wanting to keep the playfulness going for a little while longer I said: "And here I was, thinking you liked rescuing me.. "
He blew out a breath: "This ain't no laughin' matter, Caterina. My stupidity almost got you killed."
"No. Colm O'Driscoll almost got me killed. If it wasn't for you, I'd be dead right now."
A shiver ran through his shoulders, as if the words physically affected him. "You looked like you'd already died." He raked his hand through his hair. "Dutch, Hosea, Charles and I had been lookin' for you for days. I was afraid I was too late, lost too much time ridin' back to camp to get help." He stared behind me, eyes unseeing. "You were so pale when I found you."
"Yeah…" It was all I could say, remembering the pain I'd felt. The struggle to stay awake. To get out of there.
We stayed silent for a long moment, when I said: "You know why I am still alive?"
"Because you killed the bastard.." He said, a glint of pride on his face. But he still refused to look at me. "Because you killed Colm o'fucking Driscoll. Ha!"
I smiled at him. "Yes.. That too.. And I will let you gloat some more in a while, but not before you understand something really well.." Yearning to touch him, I leaned over and grabbed his hand again.
"It would've been so easy to just give up.. Being stuck in that cell, with no way out.. It would've been the easiest thing in the world to just lay down and accept my fate. But I didn't. And do you want to know why?"
He looked at me, something so deeply vulnerable in his eyes it almost took my breath away.
"Because of you." I gave his hand a little squeeze "Colm said he'd use me as bait, to catch you. To kill you. And the thought alone.. That I would be the reason you'd…" My breath caught, and a tear streamed down my cheek.
More gentle than I'd ever seen him, he'd placed a finger underneath my chin and looked deeply into my eyes.
"Cat.." His voice breathless. And he leaned over and kissed me. First softly, but then the kiss deepened. He kissed me with such urgency, with reverence almost. As if he couldn't believe I was real. His hands cupped my face and titled it backwards, and his tongue stroked deep inside.
I could feel heat gather in the pit of my stomach. I threaded my fingers in his hair and pulled his face down on mine, crushing our lips together. I arched my back, trying to push my body against him, wanting more contact. But hissed when my ribs protested painfully.
He immediately broke the kiss. "I'm so sorry, Cat." He said, hands roving me as if expecting to find a new injury.
"My damn ribs.. I think I broke them when I fell.."My breath caught. "Max? Is she…?"
"Max is alright. They left her when they took you. I brought her back, that little spitfire of yours is a real handful, you know that?"
I grinned, feeling relieved. "That's why you like us so much, isn't it?"
He kissed my forehead "I've said it before, and will say it again.. I am a damned fool. But yes, it is why I love you both."
I was stunned into silence for a moment, but then couldn't resist saying: "So.. Who do you love more, me or Max?"
He flashed a crooked smile. "I tell you that I love you, and you just have to mock me again. That ain't nice Miss Davis." He tucked a lock of hair behind my ear. The graze of his fingertip across my cheekbone sent a shiver down my spine.
He moved to sit back in the chair, but I scooted over and patted the space on the thin mattress next to me. He tried to fit in the small bed as best he could, pulled me close with an arm, and placed a foot on the floor to keep his balance.
He pressed a kiss on the top of my head.
"Arthur…?" I asked.
"Hmmm?" He said, into my hair.
"I love you too.."
I could feel his sharp intake of breath. After a moment he said: "Well, I guess we're both fools then.."