Chapter 1: The contract

A/N: This should not be taken seriously

Adrian Potter was cold. Then again there were very few people who could be sat outside in a blizzard and not be cold. Things weren't always like this for him, no, for about a year he had a loving family, he had lived with his Mother, Father, though they had abandoned him on a doorstep in November, or at least that's what his relatives told him, so he had to take it with a grain of salt.

How he managed to find himself homeless could be explained rather simply. He had somehow managed to teleport himself onto the school roof when his cousin and his friends had been engaging in their favourite pastime of beating him up. This wasn't the first inexplicable thing he'd done but it was by far the biggest and thus would incur the harshest punishment.

For as long as he could remember his Aunt and Uncle had been trying to 'beat the freak' out of him, to rather dismal results, it seemed that rather than reducing the amount of freakish incidents it made them more common, much to their displeasure, and his expense. It seemed that his Freakishness manifested itself in times of great distress and peril, and yet it refused to help him when he was at the mercy of his Uncle, it was as if the universe was mocking him. He must have been Hitler in a past life, or someone equally as evil.

It seemed that no matter what he did, Adrian would be punished and so he decided he would stop trying to be good, he would survive, and so, rather than facing the wrath of Vernon, Adrian decided to run. It was how he found himself sitting in nearly three inches of snow, his jumper pulled tight around himself to try and ward off the cold. At least the frigid temperature soothed his aching body.

There was a pattering of footsteps and Adrian saw a girl tear down his alley, a long spear clutched in her hands. Her clothes were a mockery of Medieval armour and consisted of little more than a few bits of metal covering her bust, her hands, a thin piece of metal serving as underwear, a pair of boots, and a helmet. The girl's body seemed to be covered in some sort of viscous fluid that glistened under the sickly orange light of the lampposts. Her face was a mask of fear, and a moment longer Adrian found out why.

Monstrous was the only way to describe the creature pursuing her. It seemed to be composed entirely of thick tentacles. Two piercing red eyes glinted from within the writhing mass, its gaze lecherous as it stared at the girl. Several of the creature's tentacles sprung from its body, coiling around the girl's body, covering her in more of the slime, a few of the managing to slip beneath her 'armour' and began groping her rather voluptuous form, a look horror, terror, and disgust on her face, a feeling that Adrian could relate to having worn it many times in his short life. Adrian wanted to help her, he really did, he just didn't know what he could do, if only he could properly control his freakishness then perhaps he wouldn't be so helpless. About the only thing he could do was slightly change his appearance, and Adrian doubted this monster would be intimidated by him changing the colour of his eyes, or growing his hair at it, and so Adrian did the only thing he could think of. He threw himself at the creature. Grabbing onto the thick tentacles that made up its back only to be violently flung into a wall. His head impacted on the wall with a rather loud thud and he collapsed onto the ground, head swimming. It was then that he heard a rather odd voice.

"Foolish human. What did you think that would achieve hmm? Now the both of you are going to die, and that's the best-case scenario. I will never understand humans." The voice said with exasperation.

"W-who's there?" Adrian's own voice seemed distant and quiet.

"Oh, you can understand me? How curious. I am Illium." The voice, Illium, paused as if in thought. "I have a proposition for you human, I shall grant you the ability to help her but in return, you must help me. What say you human?"

Adrian looked over to the girl and the creature, the beast still had its limbs inside her clothing and seemed to be struggling to rip it from her body. The girl herself had tears running down her face and a look of horror, terror, and disgust on her face, a feeling that Adrian could relate to having felt it many times in his short life. That was all it took to make his decision; he would not wish what he expected to happen on anyone.

"Y-y-yes." Adrian whispered. "I will do whatever you say, just let me help her."

"Very well human, hold out your hand."

Adrian slowly extended his hand towards where he thought the voice was coming from and saw a small black cat slink out from the shadows, he tried to pull it away but the cat was faster and bit his hand. A strange warmth filled Adrian's finger and began to spread throughout the rest of his body, it chased away the cold, numbness, and even the fog that had covered his mind making his thoughts sharp once more. Adrian looked down at his finger and saw a ring on it. It was a simple gold band with a small green gem set in it.

The cat, that Adrian now assumed was Illium, looked at him and spoke. "The contract has been formed and I have granted you the power you seek but it is currently dormant, to activate it you must focus on the warmth you felt when bit you and I will force the transformation"

Adrian looked dubiously at the cat, not entirely sure that he wasn't hallucinating but did as he was told regardless, having learned long ago that it was easier to just do as he was told. A bright light enveloped him. He felt his body stretch and grow which, while not painful, was rather uncomfortable. His arm reached out completely on its own and Adrian felt something cold and hard appear in his hand. After a few more seconds of changes, the light faded, and Adrian looked down at himself. The first thing that he noticed was that he had appeared to have grown breast, and rather sizeable ones if his limited knowledge of them was anything to go by. The next thing he had noticed was that his, or rather Dudley's clothes had changed becoming something akin to an early 20th century British military uniform, though there were some rather obvious differences. Perhaps the most obvious of which was how tightly fitting it was, so tight in fact that he was worried that if he moved too much his new breasts would burst out of it. The trousers seemed to be in a similar situation, and he was glad for the large overcoat that came down to just past his knees that would hide his body should his new clothes split. The uniform itself was made of an odd khaki brown coloured fabric he couldn't identify that was far warmer than it had any right to be. A weight on his head caused him to investigate, finding what felt like an upturned metal bowl with a wide rim, a series of bandoliers covered his chest, a cursory pat telling him that they were filled with spare ammunition.

Perhaps the most shocking part of his new ensemble was the rifle clutched in his hand, though its rather distinctive shape was familiar he couldn't identify it, though it looked old, scratches covered the length, the metal looking slightly tarnished, though the moonlight glinted of the near pristine bayonet attached to the end.

Adrian was brought out of his thoughts when he heard a loud ripping sound as the girl clothes were ripped open. The creature made a satisfied grunt and spoke. Its voice was slimy and soft, it sent shivers down Adrian's spine and made him feel disgusted and violated.

"Ahhh." It said, "I'm really going to enjoy this."

This spurred Adrian into action, he levelled the rifle at the creature and charged at it. The monster's tentacles reached out and wrapped themselves around the barrel before trying to rip the weapon from Adrian's grasp, an act it seemed to be struggling with. Adrian pushed with all his strength, throwing his entire body weight behind the thrust. The barrel slipped through tentacles and the bayonet pierced the monster's side. The monster's grip tightened, and Adrian struggled to push the bayonet any further into the creature's body. Adrian's hands groped the rifle to find somewhere to grab it that would allow him to push it with more force, that was until his hand found the trigger, which he immediately pulled. There was a loud bang as the gun fired and Adrian felt the stock slam back into his, or rather her, ribs with the recoil. The bullet must have hit something as it caused the creature to go slack before exploding in a cloud of black mist. A large purple crystal and a collection of notes and coins dropping to the grown from where the monster had stood.

Adrian stood there in shock for a moment before rushing towards the girl who had collapsed after the monster had died. She was sitting slumped against the wall, a blank look in her eyes, Adrian crouched down next to her and gently shook her until she looked at him.

"A-are you okay?" Adrian asked lamely. The girl took a deep shuddering breath.

"I-I think so. God if you hadn't got here when you did-" The girl let the sentence trail off and shuddered. "Anyway, thank you. The names Lampa." Lampa looked at Adrian expectantly for a few moments. "Aren't you going to introduce yourself?"

"Oh, right, erm, my name's Adrian. Adrian Potter, nice to meet you."

"I didn't want you to tell me your real name."

Adrian looked confused "What did you want me to say then?"

"The name you use when you go out and fight monsters. You do have one, right? Don't tell me you go around telling people your real name."

"W-well t-this is the first time I've ever done this so I don't really know what's going on. I-I take it Lampa isn't your real name then."

"Of course it isn't! Who would name their child Lampa?" Lampa sighed loudly "tell me what you know and we'll go from there."

"Erm, well, I, er, I don't know anything."

"Wow, this is going to be a long night. Suppose I better tell you what you are." Lampa looked thoughtful for a moment before looking Adrian in the eye and saying, "Adrian You're a Magical Girl."

Adrian looked at her incredulously "I'm a what?"

A/N: Well there we go, chapter one, I've been working on this idea for nearly three years now, here's to hoping I can churn this out faster next time. Also please note that none of this is planned out and as such, it may be an absolute mess, oh and the updates will be slow and infrequent and may also just stop for a few months because I forgot I published this. Sorry in advance and you have
been warned, I have three chapters written so those should be uploaded relatively soon but beyond that, I've go no idea.