Just wanted to quickly say that I apologize if I get any kind of information wrong. I don't know a whole lot about how things work with military 'ins and outs' and although it is a made up world and made up military, I still feel like it should be somewhat accurate. So unfortunately, for the sake of the story...some things might not add up and I know it can be frustrating. Thank you for sticking along. I truly do appreciate it and if there's anything anyone wants to advise me on, I'm open for it. I never mind helpful criticism, or if you just want to let me know that you're enjoying this story...it means the world. :) Happy reading!

XXVIII

~ My last week in Central had passed. The day of my departure had finally come. I had spent the whole time getting my things in order. Majority of my belongings I was able to store in a unit. The rest I either gave away to friends or was able to sell to anyone else. I was able to meet my new teammates. One of them I was not too happy about.

Addams. She certainly was holding a grudge and she was making sure it was obvious. I didn't really blame her…despite the fact that she started it. However, it probably was unnecessary to ship her back to Central in that crate. None of us put any real thought into the safety or hazards that could have happened. However, considering the original plan was just to dump her in a random location, I'd say she got a pretty good deal out of it. And she was delivered in one piece, so my guilt ended there. I couldn't help but hold in a laugh every time I think about it though.

The two other teammates seemed decent enough. They had the credentials and it seemed like we would all get along…aside from Addams. We all decided to have a dinner together before we left. An attempt to get to know one another before our mission forced us together. It ended up being a bigger event than originally planned. Our 'get to know one another' gathering ended up becoming a 'farewell' party. Jessica, Sofia, Amy, Breda, Fuery and Falman bombarded and joined our group. A few friends from the others joined as well. We almost weren't able to get a table big enough for our entire party, but we managed.

I stopped by the hospital a couple times, to check on Mustang. His vision was back, and he was already adjusted to his found sight. The amount of regret and disappointment I felt that I wasn't assigned along with the others for the reconstruction of Ishval…I tried to not linger on it too much.

I was never able to bring myself to go to Jean. Both Hawkeye and Breda were keeping me informed. He had started therapy and has been going strong and steady almost every day. The therapist almost had the doctor sign an order for him so he would rest for at least a day before he wore out and hurt himself. Apparently Catalina was there often to keep him in check. I tried to tell myself to not worry. To tell myself he was no longer my concern…it didn't work.

Now here I was searching for him in the lowly populated train station. Amy, Sofia, Breda and Fuery had all surprised me and showed up just in time before the departure. My one travel bag was waiting for me on the train with the others. I hoped it would stay safe with my new team and they wouldn't let Addams get her hands on it. As much as I enjoyed wearing my uniform again, I didn't want anything to happen to my civilian clothes and if she got her hands on them, then I'd be wearing this uniform nonstop until I bought new ones in Xing. I was not looking forward to the long journey with her. The others I probably won't have a problem with but…it just won't be the same. I'm gonna miss my old team dearly.

"It would be a really nice night if the wind wasn't blowing so hard." Breda had started to awkwardly mention.

"We are not doing this." I couldn't help but shake my head and chuckle at him. I feel like this was becoming a common thing I said to him lately.

"What?" He was already taking offense. Granted yes…he wasn't wrong. The wind was ridiculous. Especially when it was a clear sky day. The sun was setting, giving everything that usual golden-orange glow that I loved so much. There was even a hint of pink in the color tonight.

"We are not going to talk about the weather and bullshit on small talk right before I leave for good."

"Don't say it like that. It won't be for good. It'll just be a few months." Amy declared with certainty. A part of me prayed that was true…but the other hoped otherwise. After hurting Jean…I was ready to never see Central again. At least not until I was able to make a name for myself. No one would ever question my abilities again, especially me. That is the whole purpose of me doing this. To stand on my own two legs with my head held high.

"I know we all said this a hundred times the other night but…I'm gonna miss you." Fuery glumly said. I couldn't bring myself to say that I would miss him too. I would miss all of them terribly, but I've been fighting to keep myself in one piece the moment I saw them.

The train whistle saved me and the tears that were putting in all the effort to come out. I used the excuse to look back at the train to give me the time I needed to gather myself again. Looking back to the group, I quickly cleared my throat and put on the best smile I could muster.

"Guess I should be…" I pointed behind me with both my thumbs over the same shoulder, indicating that I needed to board. Everyone except Breda seemed like they were now fighting for their lives to keep their emotions in check. I prayed they did because if one of them lost it, I knew I would too.

I gave each of them a quick final goodbye hug. I lingered with Breda for just a moment and finished the battle I was having with myself this whole time by handing him a sealed envelope. He glanced at it like he was confirming what it was as he read the name 'Jean' written in my handwriting. He gave me a questioning look, like he didn't know what to do with it.

"If you wouldn't mind giving it to him?" I asked as I brushed away my hair out of face as the wind drove me insane with it. I was hoping to be able to give it to him myself…but since he didn't show up to see me off…

"Do I look like a courier?" Breda asked as he huffed in annoyance.

"You don't have to of course. I was hoping to do it myself but…" I glanced behind me again as I grew nervous, wondering when the final whistle would blow.

"Don't worry, I'll make sure he-" Clearly he wasn't holding tight enough to it, as my letter blew right out of his hand with the sudden strong gust that blew right then. He reacted on reflex and tried to catch it, but it was all too late. He reached and grabbed nothing but air. Everyone in the group watched as the letter blew high into the wind. Breda gave me an apologetic look and I only shrugged my shoulders, trying to not be devastated.

"Oh, well. Guess it wasn't meant to be." I tried to brave a smile and turned to run to the train as the final whistle blew and the train released its brakes.

I quickly boarded my cart as the train started to slowly inch forward and walked down the hall to the room that was ours. Prince Ling and Lan Fan were in the room next to ours. I figured I'd stay with my group for a little while and we would all trade off with bodyguarding Ling. Unfortunately, Addams was the only one here and I swear her glare had daggers shooting out of it. I gave her an awkward smile and took the left side seat across from her by the window. She went back to her book, with her leg bouncing in annoyance.

I gave everyone one last wave good-bye and finally released a sigh of sadness as they all accepted my departure and made their exit. I looked away with my head down, wishing I didn't feel so disappointed that he didn't come. I understood. I understood just fine as to why he didn't but…it didn't stop the hurt.

I looked out the window to watch Central Station slowly move ahead, taking me and my pain away. I looked down toward the end of the platform when I swear I saw someone sitting in a wheelchair. I couldn't quite make out who it was as the sun was glaring out the window. Somehow I just knew with the sensation of my heart dropping to my stomach as I hoped it was who I thought.

I only had so much time before the train passed by. I sprang up to my feet and I hurriedly lowered the window open and leaned out causing my hair to fly around. I wish I had put it in my usual ponytail, so I didn't have to worry about brushing it out of my face. I heard Addams sigh in annoyance but ignored her.

When I caught sight and confirmed it was him, I had to hold onto the window ledge to keep myself from jumping out. He was sitting in his chair, further down the station. We locked eyes with one another as the train started to pick up some speed. I prayed it would slow down and give me just a moment longer with him. It took everything in me to not jump out and run to him. I'm sure he did it this way for a reason. If he had shown up and given us a proper final farewell…I don't know if I would've had the strength to get on this train or if he would have let me.

So many memories were racing through my mind. The academy, the ball, all the heart breaks, the weird random conversations we would have on a boring office day, and the sleepless nights we had getting to know one another. It all ranged from so many years ago to just last week. I didn't think my heart could break any more than it was, but the idea that this might be the last memory we have with one another…

The tears were building up and I didn't have it in me to stop them anymore. I noticed he was holding something up in his hand for me to see. The tears fell on my cheeks when I realized it was my letter. I don't know how…but he somehow got it. The wind must have delivered it to him personally. I wanted to call to him. Tell him I love him one last time, but instead…I desperately memorized the expression on his face. The expression that told me he already knew what the letter said. That he loved me. I couldn't hold it in anymore. I knew what I had to say and trust that my letter told him the rest.

"Let me go." I shouted as loud as I could, praying he heard me over the wind and the clanging of the train as it continued in picking up speed. His surprised face told me he did. I love him. I will always love him. That's why I can't ask him to wait.

The last thing I was able to see, before the train took me far enough, was him hiding his face with the hand that held my letter. I knew he was crying, just as I was. I knew his heart broke and longed for me, just as mine did for him.

I finally brought myself back into the train and shoved the window back up, locking it in place as the train was up to full speed. I sat back down on my bench and refused to look anywhere but the window. I hope the rest of the crew stayed away longer. It was bad enough that I was crying in front of Addams. I didn't need to do it in front of everyone else that I was supposed to be in charge of.

Addams let out a quiet sigh and closed her book as she stood up. I quickly tried to wipe away the tears, but more kept falling. She didn't say anything. She just opened the sliding door and gave me a knowing nod before sliding the door shut.

Did she…was she being considerate and giving me some privacy? I stared at the door in shock before taking my attention back to the darkened outside world, finally releasing the sob that I was holding in for so long. The sun was practically fully gone from the sky now. Just a soft glow was left on the world. Dusk was upon us, making it difficult to make anything out.

I have until our first stop. That's how long I'm giving myself to hide in this emptiness that was consuming me. When we reach our first stop, I will leave all emotions and feelings behind. I don't know…but I'll figure it out. I will accept my decision and release any regret I have. This was the start of my new adventure. The start of remaking myself and becoming the Abby that I always wanted to be. I wasn't going to let anything get in the way now. My time with my old team will be cherished. I won't forget them.

My love for Jean Havoc won't be easy to get over. No. I don't think I could love anyone the way I love him. However, I was willing to see what this life of mine brought me and maybe one day our adventures would bring us back to each other. I hoped that by then he will have a fulfilled life. Perhaps a family of his own. I prayed we could share our new stories and laugh together, as old friends. I feel it in my soul that our story isn't over yet. Life separated us once before and brought us together once before. It can happen again. ~

Continue…?