The morning after Estayávë, Manwë received a mild shock when Olórin turned up for his duties. The Maia had an expression that managed to mix sheepishness, irritation, and a bit of true embarrassment.
He was also green.
"I must apologize for my appearance, my lord," Olórin said somewhat plaintively. "I have no idea where my little brother gets his sense of humor from…"
"Námo," Manwë called for the other Vala with some amusement in his voice. Námo appeared, raising his eyebrows at Olórin's appearance, but otherwise not reacting. "It seems your youngest is doing better," Manwë continued, gesturing at Olórin.
"Mairon," Námo called, and the Maia appeared, grinning at the sight of his older brother.
"Yes, my lord?" he asked in an innocent tone of voice.
"Would you care to explain why Olórin is green?" Námo asked him.
"You told me to practice implementing strategy," Mairon replied with a shrug. "So I did so." Námo looked at him for a minute, then turned to Manwë with the beginnings of a smile on his face.
"It seems Mairon was simply following my orders," he said. "Though in the future I will amend them to exclude pranks on Olórin," he added in response to Mairon's grin.
"But I'm green!" Olórin all but wailed. Mairon grinned at him.
"You almost ended up blue instead," he told him smugly.
"How do I get it off?" Olórin demanded.
"I'm sorry, brother, did you say something?" Mairon replied in faux innocence. Olórin pounced on him.
"Tell me how to get it off!" Olórin demanded loudly, right into Mairon's ear. The two Valar let the ensuing exchange go on for a bit, but as Mairon's repetitions of 'WON'T!' continued to get louder and louder, they eventually stepped in.
"That's enough, you two," Manwë said firmly, though not without humor. The two broke apart, playfully glaring at each other, though Olórin's expression had a bit more heat to it.
"Mairon, tell him how to remove it," Námo said in much the same tone. Mairon pouted for a moment, did as asked, then skipped to Námo's side.
"You're in high spirits this morning," Námo chuckled, stroking the Maia's hair. Mairon smiled, leaning against the Vala.
"I had a good time at the festival," he said.
"Well, I am glad, but no more pranks on your brother," Námo said. "At least none that interfere with his duties."
"Alright," Mairon said innocently. "Nothing else that interferes with his duties." Olórin sighed in exasperation.
"You may go clean up, Olórin," Manwë said with amused compassion.
"Thank you, my lord," Olórin said, a distinct plaintive note in his voice now. Mairon snickered. Olórin glared at him as he left.
"Come along, my impish little one," Námo said, shaking his head in fond amusement. "Let's go home…"
Mairon took his lord's hand, and they thought themselves back to Mandos. Mairon hummed cheerfully as they walked down the corridors, passing a common room on the way. Qunetalë looked up as they passed, and waved a hand.
"Mairon!" she called. With a quick glance at Námo to make sure it was alright, Mairon joined her, where she was sitting talking with her sister Samindë.
"You'll want to hear this," Qunetalë told him bluntly. Mairon raised an eyebrow.
"It's about what I saw and heard last night, while cleaning up," Samindë told him. Mairon looked slightly worried. Samindë shook her head.
"It's a good thing, not bad," she said. "At least, I believe you will find it so." Mairon now looked intrigued.
"It seems that those rumors that have been circulating about you have been put to rest," Samindë said. "No one is repeating them; they are all repeating instead what happened last night." Mairon looked stunned.
"You know who Métimo is, correct? Nyeleccaner's younger brother?" Qunetalë asked. Mairon nodded.
"I did not see the beginning of this, but it seems from context and what I heard from others, that he had begun to repeat some of the rumors about you," Samindë began. "Nyeleccaner was there as well, and questioned his motives. He then went on to tell Métimo that if he was truly concerned he should have spoken to his lord, and publicly stated that the rumors were false, and that even if they were true, we should not be repeating them." Mairon looked stunned.
"Nyeleccaner said that?" he asked in amazement. "Why? He never cared for me." Samindë nodded.
"He said that too," she said. "He said that you were never welcomed among Aulë's people, and that he did nothing as your relationship with Aulë grew worse. He said that because of that, he and Aulë are also to blame for your fall." Mairon frowned.
"I am not sure I agree with him," he said. "While their actions did make things harder for me, I would not say they deserve blame. I mean, yes, my actual fall was provoked by the fact I overheard Aulë telling Nyeleccaner I was useless. But by that time I had already had many opportunities to change my situation that I had not taken." Now Qunetalë frowned.
"I felt from what I know of your story that your actions were perfectly understandable," she said. To her surprise, Mairon nodded.
"Understandable," he said. "But not, perhaps, inevitable. There were other actions I could have taken. I took the easiest path. Yes, I was driven down that path like a hunted wolf before the hounds, and many of the avenues I could have taken to escape were blocked…but not all. Even if I could not bring myself to tell Aulë what was going on…I served with Lady Varda's people for a long time, and at that point it was easier to ignore Morgoth. She would have welcomed a confidence from me. I knew my brother and Eönwë both adored and fully trusted Lord Manwë. He too, would have listened to me had I asked to speak with him. I even could have told Olórin that I was having problems with my relationship with Aulë, and he probably would have helped me find somewhere else to serve. I was fascinated by what I learned with Lady Varda, and I am sure she would have welcomed me. But I did none of these things." Mairon shrugged.
"I wanted what he offered me," the young Maia admitted, "and that wasn't just love and acceptance. He offered me power and prestige; power and prestige I felt I deserved. I could have tried to take a harder path and escape from him…but I did not. If I had, yet had failed, then it would be a different story, and I would perhaps hold no blame for what happened." He paused.
"In the end, though, the majority of the blame lies with Morgoth," Mairon said. "He should not have done what he did to me at the time and certainly not…not…what he did later."
Keep telling yourself that, Mairon, he thought to himself dryly. Maybe one day you'll actually believe it.
Qunetalë was frowning, but Samindë nodded thoughtfully.
"I think that is very wise of you," she commented. "To realize that you were not wholly blameless in this matter, but that a power greater than your own brought it to be. You accept your own responsibility, and yet seek to become better and to change from what you have been: that speaks highly of you. More than it would, perhaps, had you no fault in the matter."
"Thank you," Mairon whispered. He had not thought of it like that, that there was greater strength in facing what you did wrong and seeking to change it than having no fault to begin with. He smiled shyly.
"Still," he went on, changing the subject. "I cannot believe that it was Nyeleccaner who spoke for me like that! Of all the people to bring these rumors to a hardly untimely end…"
"Perhaps it is because it was the last person you would expect that it worked," Qunetalë proposed. "All the others who have spoken for you are close to you. Nyeleccaner is not. And he is Aulë's chief Maia. Istamírë and Nyárë have spoken for you, of course, but Istamírë is known to be very protective of her own, and Nyárë is her sister. Nyeleccaner by his own story was always very dismissive of you."
"I'm not sure I would say dismissive," Mairon said. "But he certainly had no use for me."
"Qunetalë is right, that gives it weight," Samindë agreed. "And it should send powerful ripples through Aulë's folk. It may not, however, stop whoever is spreading these rumors." Mairon nodded his agreement, going grim.
"The only end goal worth their rebellion would be me in the Void," he said, voice like ice. Qunetalë blanched.
"That will not happen, no matter what else does," Mairon reassured her. "But nothing else would change my circumstances enough to be worth it to them." Qunetalë didn't look that reassured, but Samindë nodded.
"I fear you are correct, Mairon," she said.
"And with that being the case, they are not going to give up now," Mairon finished.
"So what are you going to do?" Qunetalë asked quietly. Mairon smiled now, softening his face and eyes.
"Live," he said simply, remembering the advice Námo had given him. Both sisters nodded, smiling as well, though it was a bit hesitant on Qunetalë's part.
"Well, let us speak of something more cheerful," Samindë said briskly. "What did you think of what Lady Varda was wearing yesterday?" Qunetalë brightened immediately.
"Oh, it was lovely," she breathed. Seeing they were going to dive into a deep discussion about clothes, Mairon held up his hands in mock surrender.
"I do believe I am not nearly qualified to discuss clothes with two of Lady Vairë's Maiar!" he laughed. "Now, if we were going to discuss jewelry, I might have an intelligent comment or two. But I need to make sure Lord Námo doesn't have anything he wishes me to do today, so I shall leave the two of you to your no doubt fascinating conversation."
Both sisters shot Mairon identical teasing grins, but let him go without commenting on his hasty retreat. A quick thought informed him Námo was with the elven children, so Mairon joined him there.
"Mairon!" several children immediately called, running over to him. Pleased to be remembered, he sat down on the floor, and quickly had his lap filled with small fëar. Námo chuckled.
"Well, hello Mairon," he said. "Were you looking for me?" Mairon nodded.
"Qunetalë and Samindë had a very interesting tale about Nyeleccaner," he said, opening his mind to his lord and showing him the conversation. Mairon was proud he was able to do so without wincing. He trusted Námo, but mental conversations were still out of his comfort zone, especially with a Vala. Námo raised an eyebrow.
"Do you want me to inform Aulë you wish to speak with Nyeleccaner, then?" he asked. Mairon grinned.
"That is the proper channel of communication, is it not?" he asked wryly. "Although, I do believe I should technically be speaking to Istamírë about that, not you…" Námo chuckled at that. Nyeleccaner was one for things done in the proper fashion, and both he and Mairon knew it.
"Then I shall inform Istamírë when I hear back from Aulë about Nyeleccaner's answer," Námo responded. Mairon could not help snickering at that. Several of the children in his lap, though, becoming bored with this conversation they could not follow, tugged at his clothes.
"Mairon? Will you play with us?" one asked. Mairon smiled at them.
"Of course I will," he responded, letting them pull him up and into their games. Námo watched for a minute with a fond smile, before heading to Vairë's workshop to learn more about just what Nyeleccaner had done the night before, and what all the ramifications seemed to be.
It wasn't until the late afternoon that Mairon heard from Istamírë (who seemed just as amused as Mairon about passing on the message like they were) that Nyeleccaner was willing to meet with him. It had been agreed that they would meet in Valmar, in Námo and Vairë's mansion. Apsenë and Ipsinë, twin sisters who served Námo and Vairë respectively, and who lived in Valmar to be closer to their siblings, had set out refreshments on a balcony that had a wonderful view of the city. Mairon was just thanking Apsenë for their trouble when Ipsinë showed Nyeleccaner in.
"Nyeleccaner," Mairon said in greeting as the sisters left. Unconsciously, he mirrored the older Maia's formal bearing. It was something he had done quite a bit in his past, and even if he had not had a need or a desire to do so since returning to Valinor, the habits of leadership and command had not deserted him.
"Mairon," the other Maia said with a nod.
"I wanted to thank you," Mairon continued. "For your defense in my behalf at the festival." Nyeleccaner shrugged.
"I would have done it for anyone," he replied, not trying to brush Mairon off, or devalue what he was saying, simply stating a fact.
"I know," Mairon said, shrugging as well. "But you did it for me, so I am thanking you."
"Then you are welcome," Nyeleccaner replied. They were silent for a time, staring off into the gathering night.
"I actually thought you would be upset," the older Maia finally said. Mairon frowned in confusion.
"That you silenced those who were saying that about me?" he asked. Nyeleccaner shook his head.
"Because that I admitted I wouldn't accept your presence because I felt you were too young," he replied.
"Oh," Mairon responded. Then he surprised Nyeleccaner by smiling.
"Well, you were right, so how could I be upset?" he said sincerely. Catching the older Maia's surprise, he explained further.
"I probably was too young to come to Eä," he said. "But it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I wanted to be a part of it… So I came," he ended lamely, shrugging again. Nyeleccaner studied him briefly.
"Well, I meant what else I said as well," the older Maia said. "What we are doing now is not beyond any with skill. I do not know if you have any desire to craft again, but you would be more than welcome in my lord's forges." Mairon's face lit up in surprised delight.
"Truly?" he asked. "It has been long Ages since I have been able to shape things of beauty simply for pleasure. I would indeed love the opportunity to do so again." Nyeleccaner smiled, and laid a hand on the younger Maia's shoulder, squeezing gently.
"Then let me know when you have free time and would wish to come, and I will arrange it," he told the delighted Mairon.
"Thank you," Mairon said, reaching up to quickly squeeze Nyeleccaner's wrist. His first impulse was to hug the other Maia, but he knew Nyeleccaner would not care for that.
"You are very welcome," Nyeleccaner replied. He studied the other Maia once more.
"You have grown, Mairon," he said seriously.
"I didn't really have a choice," Mairon replied quietly.
"Perhaps you did not," Nyeleccaner conceded. "But it does not naturally follow that forced growth bears evil fruit. You have indeed grown, both in wisdom and stature. So let others say what they will, for they are only revealing their own littleness. Keep your head up, and the world will see the truth in the end." With that, he patted Mairon on the shoulder, and left, leaving Mairon smiling softly. He had never expected to have that particular Maia as a friend, but now, it looked like that might just happen.
Mairon paused before thinking himself back to Mandos, and grabbed a few sweet biscuits. No point in letting them go to waste, after all, he thought with a smirk, as he took himself off for home.
Thank you to all my lovely reviewers! Keep it up! I should be able to get some writing time soon, as soon as I get this stupid paper done! Which, as it's due Monday...Yeah...