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"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Swan," Edward groaned, dragging his hand over his face and through his hair. "It'll be too much."

"Maybe," she replied. "But I still want to. You act like I'm asking you to jump out of an airplane, or something. It's just a little party."

"A little party?" Edward scoffed. "There's no such thing as a little party when it comes to our friends and family."

"I know."

Bella grinned, trying to hide how much her body ached as she rolled over and straddled him. They'd been laying in their bed, her too weak to even try to go into the living room, even though it had been four days since her last infusion treatment. Tomorrow morning, she and Edward would go to the hospital, where Emmett and Carlisle would place a device no bigger than the size of a quarter at the base of her skull that would hopefully save her life. And she was scared to death.

"And you're sure you want to do this? We could stay here," he suggested. "Naked. Have our own big party, if you catch my drift."

Bella laughed. "Big, huh? You and I can have a huge party tonight, after the small get together."

"Promise?" he asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"I do," she whispered. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For loving me."

Edward sat up with her still on his lap, his arms wrapping around her, holding her against him. "Loving you is easy, sweetheart. It's losing you that scares me."

"Me too," she whimpered.

—BDBH—

Though Bella knew Edward was worried about Bella being able to handle a party, he agreed and just after eight, Edward and Bella were sitting on the front porch, waiting for their friends and family to arrive. The last four weeks had been the hardest of her life, and she just needed one night where she felt normal. Especially seeing as she was about to start phase two.

"Swan!" Alice giggled, hurrying around the side of the bungalow with Jasper right behind her. She launched herself onto the porch, sitting next to Bella, and slipping her arm in with hers. "This was a great idea."

"I thought so," she said, trying to make her smile seem real. She looked over at Jasper, who was standing awkwardly on Alice's other side. "What's up, Cowboy?"

"Oh, you know," he said, tilting his head toward Alice. "Trying to keep up with her."

"Good luck," Bella laughed, wincing when her chest hurt. "That was dumb."

"Sorry," Jasper muttered, frowning.

"Why are you sorry?" she asked.

"I made you laugh?" he said, making it sound more like a question than a statement.

"I like laughing," she told him.

"But I don't like when you hurt," he said, quietly. "I wish I could take all the pain for you, Swan."

"I don't," she said, and when Jasper, Alice, and Edward looked at her, she added, "I wasn't prepared for how hard this would be, but I watched my father waste away until he got to the point where dying was the only option he had left. I'm not ready to die, Cowboy, and if every inch of my skin has to hurt, if I'm too weak to stand, too tired to breathe, in order to live the next fifty years with Edward, then I'll do it. I'm not giving up. Not yet, at least."

"Good," Alice smiled, though it didn't quite reach her eyes. "Now, we have a party to set up."

While Alice and Jasper hurried toward the water to start the bonfire, setting up the stereo, Bella laid her head on Edward's shoulder, trying to find the strength to hold on.

—BDBH—

By eleven, the party was raging, as they say. The fire had been lit and most of them were seated around it, roasting marshmallows, making s'mores, and drinking. Everyone but Bella and Edward of course. She had never been a big drinker, anyway, but with the phase two starting in nine hours, she was already nervous. Adding alcohol to the mix wasn't a good idea.

Alice and Jasper were seated to Edward's left, while Esme and Carlisle were to Bella's right. Emmett and Rose were on the other side of the fire with Seth and Tanya, who were talking animatedly with James and Laurent. Only Felix was missing, having had to head back to the mainland to prepare for their next tournament.

"So, Swan, here leaps out of her desk, grabs Sam by the back of his head and slams him against the chalkboard," Alice snickered. "Chalk goes everywhere, of course, but before Dr. Banner could stop her, she knees him in the jewels and says, 'You couldn't beat me if you had training wheels on your board, dickweed'."

"I didn't call him dickweed," Bella disagreed. "I called him a doushenozzle, and then told him if he had dick big enough, he'd met me after school and I'd show him how a real man surfs."

Everyone laughed.

"Did he show up?" Edward asked, raising an eyebrow.

"He did," she admitted. "See, Sam thought because he was older, and a man, that he was better than me, but nobody was better me in the water. We stood on the beach with practically the entire school around us."

"Including Dr. Banner," Alice laughed.

"Including Dr. Banner," Bella confirmed. "As we paddled out, I could feel their energy. The swells were miles high. He, being the cocky motherfucker that he was, went after the first wave that popped up. Took his ass out."

"He went after the second wave that popped up," Alice said. "Took his ass out, too."

"And the third," Esme snickered. "But not, Bella. She was patient, waited for the right wave, and then, she soared. Kicked his ass, made sure he knew nobody was better than her."

"How do you know when a wave is good?" Tanya asked.

"Um, you feel it," she said, pulling her knees up to her chest, tucking her arms between them and her body. "In your soul. The way the water moves, the sense of . . . I don't . . . peace when you're out there. You have to become one with the ocean. Probably sounds crazy, but when I'm on the water, I feel like I can do anything," she whimpered, feeling her eyes fill with tears. "Sorry."

"Are you scared?" James asked. "About tomorrow, I mean?"

Bella shifted her eyes to Emmett before nodding. "Terrified."

Emmett frowned, causing Rose to reach over, placing her hand on top of his. "Me too."

"You are?" Bella asked, and when he nodded, she asked, "Why?"

"Because I don't want to fail you," he said before he stood up and walked down the beach.

Bella gave Edward a look before she followed Emmett. They stopped at the edge of the water, though neither of them spoke for several minutes. The silence wasn't awkward, or weird, just silent.

"Do you love her?" Bella asked, causing Emmett to look down at her. "Rose. Do you love her?"

"I do," he said, smiling. "I've been so focused on my work, Bella, I didn't give myself a chance to fall in love. It was easier, I guess."

"Easier than what?"

"Not letting myself get hurt, the way my mom and dad were when they broke up." Emmett inhaled a sharp breath. "They were the classic story of two people who should never have been together. High school sweethearts, whose relationship ended when she found out she was pregnant with me. They tried, but by the time I was two, they fought more often than not. I spent my time between both of them, each trying to constantly one up the other on who was the better parent. I threw myself into my school work, got a full ride to Harvard, became a doctor, and here I am."

"How incredibly lonely that life sounds," Bella murmured.

"I didn't even realize how lonely I was until Carlisle called, telling me about this patient who needed my help." Emmett looked down at her smiled. "I wish I could promise you that phase two will work, that in a month, I can tell you that you're cured, Bella. You have no idea how much I want to be able to tell you, of all people, that, but I can't make that promise."

"I know," she cried, wrapping her arms around herself. "But you can promise me something."

"What?" he asked, shifting so that he was facing her.

"If phase two fails, if I die," she sobbed, "take care of him. Be there for him. Make sure he knows that you love him, Em, because he's going to need you."

"I promise," he whispered, reaching out and pulling her into his arms. "I promise, Bella."

"Call me Swan," she sniffled before pulling away from him. "All my family does, Em."

Bella turned and walked back up the beach, settling in her chair next to Edward, who slipped his hand in with hers. She tried to smile, reassure him that everything was okay, but nothing was all right.

—BDBH—

At six the next morning, Bella and Edward arrived at the hospital. Neither had slept. They were too scared, too nervous, and too anxious. So after everyone left the party, they sat on the beach, holding each other, promising to teach him how to surf, to go skydiving, to live, love, and be happy for the rest of their lives. No matter how short, or long, that life may be.

But now, they would be forced to face the toughest of challenges, the hardest part of the trial. Bella tried to be brave and strong as they checked in, dealt with registration, and were taken to her room, where she stripped out of her clothes and placed a yellow and red hospital gown and yellow no slip socks. She climbed into the bed, pulled the blanket over her legs. The nurse came in and took her vitals, started her I.V., asked about her medical history, the usual bullshit that came with a stay in the hospital. After almost half an hour, she left them alone, just the two of them, just for the anesthesiologist to come in, telling her about the risks of being put under. Like she wasn't scared enough.

"Everything okay in here?" Bella and Edward looked at the doorway of her room, finding Esme standing there. "Can I come in?"

"Of course," Bella murmured, reaching for her sister. "You look like shit."

"Couldn't sleep," she said, softly.

"Me either."

"I'm going to give you two a minute alone, okay?" Edward leaned over and kissed her. "I'll be back."

Bella nodded, waiting until he was out of the room before she turned back to Esme. "You know I love you, right?"

"Of course I do," Esme whimpered. "I told myself I wasn't going to cry today."

"I think today's a good day to cry."

Esme sat on the side of Bella's bed, draping her arms over her legs. "There's so much I want to say."

"Me too." Bella winced as she pushed herself up on the bed, causing Esme to reach out for her. "I'm okay."

"You've always been the strongest woman I know you're scared, Bells, because I am, too. I just . . . I need you to know that no matter what happens, if the implants works, or doesn't work, I'm so thankful that you're my sister. I love you so much."

"Oh, Essie," Bella sobbed. "I couldn't do this without you. You're hero, you know?"

"I am?"

Bella nodded, hear tears sliding down her face. "You gave me the strength to let him love me."

"And he does," she whispered as Edward walked back into her room with Emmett and Carlisle behind him.

Carlisle immediately had Esme in his arms, holding her as she cried. He would take care of her, Bella knew. He was in madly, passionately in love with her sister, and meant the world to Bella.

"Well," Emmett said, clapping his hands together. "They'll take you down to the O.R. in a few minutes."

"How long will the procedure take?" Edward asked.

"Four hours, or so," he explained. "The risks of the surgery aren't high, but, there are risks."

"Like what?"

"Reactions to the anesthetic. There not common, but there are risks. Um, because of where the implant is being placed, you might have some nerve damage, weakness to the left side of your body."

"Is that likely?" Bella asked.

"No, just risks." Emmett placed his hand on her shoulder. "I'm not going to let anything happen to you, Swan. I promise."

"I really hope not," she murmured.

Emmett and Carlisle walked Esme out to the waiting room, leaving just Bella and Edward alone.

"When I saw you on the beach that morning," Edward said, threading his fingers in with hers. "When I knocked you over, I was stunned by how beautiful you were. I tried to stop before I hit you, but it all happened so fast," he whimpered. "I was such a dick."

"You were," she laughed, through her tears.

"That night, at JJ's, I was coming to apologize. I wanted to make it right, but then Newton bumped into me, and . . ."

"Fucking Newton," she muttered as a tear slipped down her face. "Don't leave me."

"Never," he murmured, sliding into the bed next to her, holding her as tight as he could. "Never letting go, sweetheart."

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