Three: Gokudera

I couldn't believe how close I was to winning in that fucking choice 'game' before I was taken out. If it had been me, and not fucking Yamamoto I would have been able to kill the bastard and make him stay dead! 'An inch of his life?' What the hell was that?! He shouldn't give an inch, ever. Period! Instead, we lost, and now we can't even stay in our hideout. This is most-likely the lowest I have felt in years all because of fucking Yamamoto's mistake. And the worst part is that its just so 'like' him that I cant even be surprised, pissed the hell off-absolutely, but not surprised. Shit, the look on his face makes it hard to even yell at him, and its not all his fault, I guess. I wasn't able to get to the bastard in time so, really, it was a failure on us both-though way more on his part, obviously. Still, now we were in this fucking forest and are all a little injured and-wait, what was tenth saying just now? Like hell I wont fight!

''Tenth I-"

I sighed as I sat alone on a fucking rock in the woods of Namimori. I had left the clearing and the others after having stood up to the tenth for the first time, too embarrassed and-honestly annoyed, by everyone's stares. I mean.. it couldn't be helped, as right-hand man its my job to tell the boss my opinion when it really counts, and I know that but…What the fuck was that confidence?! Like fuck I can win right now! My back's barely letting me sit upright! I'll just be the sorry bastard who let the boss down when he fucking trusted my word! I put my head in my hands and sighed again, angry at my big-ass ego getting me into a shitty situation again.

From my rock I could hear the distant fire and shushed whispers of the tenth as he laid out the plan to the others, but I couldn't listen to it right now. I know my part, I know what to do, and that was as much as I needed to know at the moment thank you very much! If I think about what tenth and the others are going to be doing I won't stand a chance- well, ok, I'll stand even Less of a chance of winning. I flinched as the injury caused my back to spasm slightly. Damn it! My back ached like a fucking bitch! Still… It hurts less sitting on this rock, its far more soothing than sitting on the ground- at least here I have a way to lean back a little bit. I took a deep breath to calm myself as looked around once more and then leaned back against another rock. I closed my eyes to try to get some measure of rest and ended up having a fitful half-sleep.

In my half-awake dream I had failed-the most likely outcome, really; and died like a pathetic loser. I was looking down at my funeral, the black coffin so much like the tenths had been was surrounded in flowers and my picture was sitting on top of it. The tenth was on the ground, crying and blaming himself for letting me go at all while the other guardians stood by and watched as I was put into the ground. Yamamoto's face was the first to flash into my mind, but instead of that damn easy-going smile, the idiot in my head a face stained with tears and the look of a wet puppy-he would be sad, after all, because we are friends. Lambo was next, his annoying face covered in snot and tears, I-pin, too, would be sad that I wasn't around. The turf top would probably go to my fucking funeral in a ceremonial boxing outfit shouting about some 'extreme loss' while crying-which caused me to bristle at the thought; his sister would stand by the devasted tenth, as would Haru. Mukuro wouldn't show up, of course, but Chrome had chosen to be there, staring straight ahead and unmoving. Then there was Hibari. His face flashed into my mind as he stood behind the others but I couldn't quite see his expression, his head was down in my dream and I had the strongest urge to hold him, he looked so sad.. lost somehow...

My sleep was interrupted by a sudden snap of a tree branch, my eyes widening and my body instantly on alert, I jumped to my feet as I reached for a box… ''Gokudera Hayato.'' I froze, watching as Hibari emerged from the darkness his expression unreadable, his eyebrows nit together ruining his normally handsome face. "What are you doing here?" I asked, raising an eyebrow in confusion. He met my gaze for a moment before continuing to move closer to me, stopping a few feet away. This is the closest we have been without fighting in nearly a year- ''That was impressive, Gokudera Hayato. Who knew you could stand up to your 'boss' like that.'' His tone wasn't right, though. Something was different.. ''Che! I have respect for the tenth so of course I will do whats best for him and the rest of the guardians!'' I whispered angerly, though there was nothing to really get angry at, besides, of course, my own pride.

I expected him to threaten to bite me to death for my tone, but instead he slowly walked over to me, leaning forward and pressing his forehead to my own ''Don't you dare die, Gokudera Hayato.'' He said, staring into my eyes. I met his gaze, unable to come up with any sort of response, because I couldn't process what he was doing or the emotion so clearly in his eyes. He was worried, his eyes filled with unmistakable fierce concern, his face, too seemed to be mimicking his eyes. He held my gaze for another minute before leaning his head down into the space between my neck and shoulder, wrapping his arms around my waist and taking slow, deep breaths, seeming to be inhaling my scent. ''Please.'' He whispered, just once, into my ear. A plea for me to follow those words.

I couldn't believe what was happening, my mind seeming to go blank before my body relaxed and I realized that I felt oddly comfortable in his arms, safe, somehow. Soon, I too leaned into him, my own arms moving of their own accord and wrapping around him, my head pressed against the side of his. We stood that way for god knows how long. Neither of us seemed to want to move. It was silent, all I could hear was his breathing and the thudding of a heart beat that was different from my own. The smell of an unfamiliar yet intensely comforting shampoo accompanied by the woodsy smell of his skin and the warmth of his body against mine. After a while, his arms tightened their hold around me and I too tightened my arms around him.

We stayed like this until we could hear the tenth call for us in the distance. Seeming to snap out of our trance, we pulled away at the same time and met each other's eyes once again, foreheads pressing together. '' I wont.'' I whispered, my next words flowing from somewhere deep inside me that I didn't seem to be aware of '' You better come home, too.'' I watched as his eyes softened and he put his hand on my heart, nodding ''of course I will. Who do you think I am, Hayato?'' he flashed me a cocky smirk, clearly finding my concern needless. Che, bastard. '' A cocky fucker?'' I said, returning his smirk as he actually snorted in amusement, a smile forming on his face as our eyes met again and he pushed his forehead harder against mine, our noses touching while I saw his expression shift Concern, Certainty, and Strong Conviction were now mixing in his eyes. "I will come home.'' He whispered as the urge to lean forward, to dare to touch his lips surged inside me and just as I saw a shift in his eyes, something similar, something telling me he would like that- the tenths' voice became clearer from behind me, forcing us to move apart. He turned his back to me and I couldn't stop myself from watching him walk away as he disappeared quickly into the forest. My heart thudding painfully in my chest.