AN: Here's the Bella backstory finally!

I mimicked Edward's posture, pressing my hands together and I looked down at them. How to begin this story? Probably right at the beginning. Safe bet. I looked out of the kitchen window, watching a squirrel run around a tree outside. I made sure to keep my gaze affixed on the small rodent as he or she worked on doing the little squirrel things squirrels do. It would be easier than looking into the intense eyes of the man sitting across the table from me.

"I've always been accident prone. I'm not a very coordinated person, and I've had more trips to the hospital than Carlisle I'd wager. It's made for an interesting life. My mom is also not very responsible. She's a very good person, and a very good mother, but she's a little scatterbrained and she goes through different phases of things very quickly. She's not overly good at remembering things if I don't remind her. I love her to pieces, and she's my best friend, and I don't remotely blame her for anything... but it was a series of unfortunate remembrances and my lack of coordination that led to me getting into a car accident that almost killed me."

It didn't feel like I was telling this right already.

"I love my mom. She's warm, kind-hearted, funny, and much prettier than me. She's adventurous, and exciting and everything I'm not really. I have too much Charlie in me. I like the solitude, and avoid people if I can. I blush easily, and once I have made a decision I am more unshakeable than she is. She's very easily swayed." I smiled, remembering the time I talked her out of sky diving. "Anyway, one night I was staying after school, really late. I'm relatively sure I was tutoring or something similar, but it's kind of foggy. I had asked her to come pick me up afterwards, as we lived half a city away from the school. And I guess she'd forgotten the time, or maybe the place. Something. The point is, I started to walk towards the closest bus terminal, figuring I could fork out the cash and take public transit faster than trying to track down my mother and her non-existent cell-phone skills."

My mind walked me back to a dark night on a city street as I stumbled along the pavement with a heavy backpack. I wasn't angry, just annoyed. It would take hours to get home, and by that point Renee would have undoubtedly panicked, checked for her dead phone, then rushed around the house trying to find a charger so that she could call me, and so forth. By that point I could have gotten home.

"It started raining. I have nothing against rain, really, when I'm prepared for it, but it suddenly started pouring. We were in Phoenix. I've got no coat, and a bag full of books, so I start running, and end up running out accidentally in front of a car with no lights on." I winced at that memory. She hadn't been going very fast, and I had only been clipped, my one leg fetching a pretty nasty bump. "I was fine, but the driver felt awful. I recognised her as soon as she got out. Her name was Sarah I think, and she was wearing a t-shirt from my high-school. She had brilliantly red hair. The point is that she recognised me too. And since she'd just hit me with a car, she offered me a ride home."

I thought about her face. How scared she'd been that I was hurt. "She was so worried about me that I thought I might have to drive her to the ER for a panic attack. She wouldn't stop apologizing the whole drive. From the moment I had gotten into the car, she'd began prattling on with more apologies, while I tried to convince her that it was my fault for running out into the road, and not looking properly. We eventually called it a draw in the stupid department. And shortly after that..."

My leg ached, no doubt a psychosomatic murmuring of pain. I rubbed my hand against my thigh as I started up again.

"Well I'm not sure what hit us. But something did. Lights. I remember headlights flashing by in the dark rain. I could hardly see out of the window. When I looked back to the dashboard, I noticed we were going way too fast. She was so flustered she wasn't watching her speed. And then I don't really know what happened."

I closed my eyes and focused on the memory. This was the dream that had haunted my nights. The spinning and the pain. One thing at a time.

"The car jerked. I'm not sure which direction. I remember the surreal feeling of quietness. My hair spinning around my face like a windmill. I remember looking towards Sarah, and then suddenly there was noise again. Another jerk, a crash landing I suppose, part of the car folded in on itself and my femur snapped."

I rubbed my leg, wincing in remembrance. My eyes were still firmly closed as I continued. I couldn't hear anything around me. Edward might not even be there anymore. "I remember waking up disoriented, and being upside down. When I looked to the car roof there was a pool of blood. I could feel it dripping, tickling as it ran up my throat and off of my head." My hands traced the path as I spoke. "I tried to get myself free, and then looked over to Sarah. She…"

I took a deep breath and opened my eyes. I looked into a pair of calm eyes. I could feel the tears welling.

"She didn't make it. The steering column had gone straight through her chest. As I looked down, or up, whatever, at my leg, I could literally see bone. It had carved a path out of my leg and into my abdomen – all the way to my uterus actually, where I was all curled up from the compression. But as I looked up, a stream of blood ended up in my mouth, and I started drowning. I started vomiting up blood, both from my injuries, and what I'd just swallowed..."

My breath and my speech were increasing in speed as I started to essentially panic. I could taste acid in my mouth and my head was feeling dizzy. Suddenly my cheeks were cold I opened my eyes to see Edward's face right in front of me. All I could see were his amber eyes. I'm not sure how long we were that close, but I calmed down. Eventually Edward let go of me, and backed away slightly. He had been kneeling in front of me, waiting. Although he backed away, he stayed kneeling, and wrapped his hands around mine.

"Thank you." I took another deep breath. "I'm nearly done my epic saga." I tried to smile. Edward smiled reassuringly at me.

"Take your time. I'm here for you." His voice was loud and strong. Unmissable.

"Well. Whatever head injuries I sustained managed to wipe out something. Again, I'm not sure if it's my actual ears, or the processing of sound, or something in my brain. I just don't hear like I used to. So there were therapy trips, physiotherapy trips, weight gain, weight loss, needle track marks from medications and tests… I missed almost a year of school in rehabilitation and hospitals. By the time I got back to school I was a year and a half behind and the people at school started treating me differently. I couldn't hear things I used to. It was a hard adjustment period."

I scowled remembering their worried, egg-shell demeanour.

"The teachers and people I did know didn't adjust easily to my new situation. Everyone stared, and talked, and pitied, and egg-shelled. I couldn't deal with it anymore." I thought about Phil and Renee, I'd forgotten their role in this story.

"Mom had been married, just before my accident, so she had a support system and she was my support system too. But even they were unsure about my new limitation. Deafness is a strange thing for people to wrap their heads around."

I looked back at Edward, who had never had a problem wrapping his head around it.

"Well most people have a problem. You're a strange cookie." I touched a section of his hair, gently, marvelling at the softness. "I never really fit in with the deaf community either, because I can hear and speak. I can't sign very well, or very fast, and I'm basically at a child's level in their world."

Distracted by his hair, I moved my other hand to it.

"I don't really fit in anybody's world."

I looked at his amber eyes again as he was still kneeling reassuringly before me.

"You fit in my world," he said, reaching his hand up to touch my face.