Originally written in late 2014, but never posted here. I finally thought "why not?" Please excuse the unusual format.
OoO
2: You know, I wanted to mention it last time we met and I forgot: Those bow ties of yours; they're too…
3: What?
2: Fancy. Elaborate. It's like you're trying too hard. Oh, look at me being Edwardian James Bond of Science, that kind of thing.
3: They're elegant. And you're the one to talk anyway. Yours is pre-tied!
2: Aha! But that's for safety reasons! That way, nobody can strangle me with it!
3: And it looks like it's been stepped on by an elephant!
2: Well…
3: And is that a safety pin? Seriously?
2: Shut up.
.
3: Oh, will you look at that! This new fellow's wearing one! Looking quite fetching too, with the tux!
2: About time! It's been like, what, 6 regenerations?
3: Well, of course! We just had to be wearing vegetables, leather, and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, didn't we?
.
10: Oh no. What is he doing, somebody stop him.
3: What's the problem?
10: He… he's putting on a bow tie! Take it off, you fool!
2: And?
10: And? What do you mean "and"? They're bad luck!
2: Excuse me? I wore bow ties all the time, they're perfectly lucky, I assure you.
10: No, they're not! Not anymore! It's probably because of the Time War! Do you wanna know what happened every time I wore one? They're freaking doom magnets!
3: Oh, are we getting superstitious in our old age?
10: No, we're drawing a valid conclusion based on established events and the considerable data at our disposal!
2: Well, maybe he believes he can take it. Looks like a promising fellow, this one. And who knows, they might not be that bad anymore. We'll just have to wait and see.
.
10: He looks okay, I'll give you that, but does he ever wear anything except bow ties? I mean, come on, a little variety would be nice!
2: Ah, but you see, there is. He wears both red and blue. And I think he bought some purple ones the other day.
10: Still, are those things glued to his neck?
3: It would seem like it.
2: Oh, stop pestering the lad! He knows what he's doing! And he does look… how did he put it? "Cool!"
3: You're only saying that because you never took that crumpled thing off either!
2: Well, yes! I honestly had more important things to do with my time than wasting it in front of a mirror! Probably just a little bit of nostalgia on his part, nothing wrong with that. "Good old days!"
3: I wonder if any of mine are still somewhere in the TARDIS…
10: Oh, in my time they were. There was this wardrobe, this big, huge wardrobe -opened it once and this weird umbrella fell on my head- well, two of yours were there.
3: Imagine that!
2: Well, I don't see him wearing anyone of those any time soon, his style's plainer.
3: With good reason! By the looks of him, he'd try one on and accidentally choke himself; that'd be embarrassing!
10: They're still unlucky though, I told you. Look, they're planning to kill him again.
3: Good Lord, don't these people have better things to do?
10: We should make a drinking game out of this!
2: You know, I think we should, those banana daiquiris of yours were absolutely splendid!
10: Thank you!
.
2: Blimey.
10: Damn.
3: Well, that was…
2: He took it off…
10: Ah, poor guy…
3: That was just sad.
10: Sad? This was physically painful to watch!
3: Damn right you are. And I didn't even like him that much at first. But you know, that's- that's dedication, right there.
10: (sniffs)
2: There, there. It's okay. He looked happy, at least… Happier than us two, right?
3: You can say that again…
10: Hey! This is a sensitive subject! It was a very, very difficult time for me!
2: And I was executed by that stuffy lot! You keep your stiff upper lip during that!
3: Still, you blew up half the TARDIS!
2: To be fair, that was a dumb idea, flying her while regenerating. What were you thinking?
10: Well, I wasn't thinking, I just wanted to get away, go somewhere, anywhere! And he did it too, see?
3: Yes, real clever after last time. Stroke of genius.
10: Look me in the eye and tell me you wouldn't have flown her one last time if you had the time, if you could.
3: …I would have.
10: And he hadn't even flown her in centuries, the poor man!
2: Still, I bet she'll be angry after this…
.
11: No, no, no, what is he saying?!
10: Oh God, what is it again?
11: They're not embarrassing! They're cool! Something's gone wrong with his memories again!
3: Oh, I don't know about that. His fashion sense is amazing.
11: He looks like a magician!
10: Yeah, he even said that…
2: Odd choice, yes, but who are we to judge?
11: I know, but a little bit of coolness never hurt anyone!
10: Oh, not this again...
3: I'm starting to hate them, I'll go steal and wear my successor's ridiculous scarf, honestly!
.
11: Haha! I called it!
3: What happened?
11: Well, he's on this train thingy, in space –-which I forgot to go to now that I think about it- very cool, and he's wearing one! I told you so! He put on a bow tie! Woooo!
10: Calm down!
11: See, see, I told you, even 12 thinks they're cool!
2: Well, it's not exactly a bow tie, it's more like that Edwardian thing my predecessor wore.
11: Still, it's a step in the right direction! He's getting there!
3: By the way, why isn't Number 1 here? He said he'd drop by to check up on the new fellow.
2: Oh, he's gone off to argue with Number 7 and your successor about who's got the best hat. Again.
11: Ha! I think we all know who has the best hat around here!
3: No. Just… no.
10: That… is a pink fez. With bright yellow feathers.
11: Precisely! Magnificence made flesh!
10: Well, I'll just call your wife then, see what she thinks…
11: No, you won't! Yeah, bring the Great Hat Destroyer on my head, why don't you? Shoot the top hat too while you're at it!
10: Let go of my tie, you'll ruin it!
11: Now, see, that's why bow ties have an advantage. And he's getting it, finally, you go 12, you magnificent man! Called it! They're cool, and they always will be!
3: Alright, he's getting annoying, I'll hold him down, you go get his wife, okay?
11: Okay, okay, fine, shutting up. (pause) But I did tell you so!
(collective groan)
.
Even more hilarious in hindsight, because yes, Twelve, do explosively regenerate with the TARDIS in flight. After all, it worked so well the last 4 times you did it, Doctor. No wonder she chucked your stupid arse into the stratosphere immediately afterwards.
Thank you for reading! To be continued. Comments are tremendously appreciated, and usually responded to.