Secret Route: Cecily
Part 1: Yurification
"Cheers!"
Four tankards smashed together, and Kazuma happily drank his ale. Ever since he'd switched over to a rewards-based incentive system, his life as an adventurer had been pretty harmonious. He looked around the table at the girls, giving himself a smug smile. He'd turned a lazy goddess, a perverted knight, and a terrorist mage into a party that was blowing through quests and levels like Kleenex.
Now all that remained was to bask in the glory, and perhaps collect his suitable reward.
Kazuma raised a hand for another mug, smiling at the guild girl who brought it over. This time, he nursed his drink.
He regarded Aqua, who was laughing and polishing off her third mug already. She was cute, even if she wasn't the brightest. Any animosity Kazuma had felt towards her had faded. Really, she was a good friend now. Maybe something more? Eh, he'd think about it.
Just before Kazuma's glance shifted, that weird swordsman, Matsumoto or something, came over and offered to buy Aqua a drink. What a jerk. Stealing from Kazuma's harem when he already had one of his own! Well, Kazuma had other options.
Even though Darkness looked like a noble night, even as she sat and mostly ignored her mug of ale as she chatted with Chris, Kazuma knew better. She was a pervert, through and through. Was Kazuma into that sort of thing? Darkness had an undeniably sexy body, and really, now that he know how to handle her, he could probably mold Darkness into his personal sexual plaything.
An interesting idea that might be worth pursuing. Well, probably when Kazuma had a clearer head, anyway. Kazuma was contemplating what to do when some other jerk came over and tried to buy Darkness a drink. She blushed and glanced at Kazuma.
"Hey, if people would buy me drinks, I wouldn't say no," Kazuma told her.
"I-I would be happy, to, um, allow you to er…"
"Oh relax Darkness, if Kazuma won't take care of you, let Taylor do it," Chris said with a laugh, and winked at Kazuma.
Kazuma looked away towards Megumin, who gave him a glare back and turned away as if he were going to steal her ale. Well, she had worked hard today, even if she hadn't gotten off an Explosion. Kazuma was coming to appreciate that she was probably his smartest party member, even if she too often used her smarts for stupid things.
"M-Megumin, I-I challenge you!"
Kazuma blinked as Yunyun appeared, plunking down a tray of ales.
"Not now, Yunyun, I'm with my friends," Megumin huffed.
"I-I'm your friend, too!" Yunyun said, tears appearing in her eyes. "A-and I challenge you, t-to a drinking contest!"
"Oh? Well, perhaps I shall allow you to do this! Ha! I shall defeat you once more, Yunyun!" Megumin bragged.
Kazuma watched the two Crimson Demons proceed to get absolutely smashed, but sighed and turned his back. He looked around, and he realized something. Previously, his party members had reputations as something of a hazard in the Axel dating scene. Darkness intimidated and frightened most men with her previous antics, while Aqua was viewed as such an oddball with her claims of being a goddess no one wanted to get close to her. And Megumin…was a Crimson Demon. And apparently that was enough.
"Those bastards! They're profiting off my hard work!" Kazuma cried, slamming his mug down on the table.
"I know! Those dirty Erisites are everywhere! But, if you act now, I can ensure that from now on, only good things will happen to you, and you'll get back at everyone who ever wronged you!" a chipper voice said in Kazuma's ear.
He blinked, and turned to find a smiling, blonde face next to his own. He jerked back slightly, but the blue eyed woman just leaned in closer.
"You deserve the reward of your own hard work, don't you agree?" the strange woman asked, glancing aside and dropping her voice to a conspiratorial whisper. She was dressed in a blue nun's robes, with some sort of eccumenical symbol Kazuma half recognized on her hat.
"I, er…yes?" Kazuma stammered.
"Right! So, if you act now, you can join the Axis Cult, and forever ensure that Lady Aqua herself will bless you, and you'll always get what you deserve!" the woman said happily, and slapped an odd paper down on the table in front of Kazuma.
"Look lady, I'm just upset that everyone is buying my party members drinks, no one seems to want to buy ME a drink, and the only reason that everyone seems to think that those girls are now prime dating material is the hard work I put in!" Kazuma snapped.
The woman sighed and took a step back out of Kazuma's personal space. "I know. It's hard, not being a cute girl. No one wants to buy you drinks! But, since I am a cute girl, and I hear that you're not too badly off, I'll allow you to buy me a drink."
"I don't even know you! Why would I buy you a drink?!" Kazuma demanded, half standing.
The woman shrugged. "Well, I would assume to get into my skirt, as that's the usual reason people buy someone drinks. And, as an innocent priestess, you might think you can take advantage of me."
She suddenly slid into the seat beside Kazuma, resting her head on his shoulder. "I'm Cecily, by the way! I like wine, but I'm not picky, ale will do!"
"Back off! I'm not buying you a drink, lady!" Kazuma said, brushing Cecily off and standing. "If anything, I'm a handsome guy! In the interest of True Gender Equality, you should buy me a drink."
Cecily's expression went apathetic, and she slid away from Kazuma. "Sorry, I have no interest in broke deadbeats. No wonder all those girls aren't interested in you."
Outraged, Kazuma stalked out of the guild. He glanced over his shoulder, but Aqua was doing party tricks for that Katsurugi guy, Megumin was leaning on Yunyun as the two of them tried to drink yet another mug of ale, sloshing it all over themselves as they tugged the one cup back and forth, and Darkness was blushing and talking quietly in a corner with Taylor. That bastard. Kazuma had even saved his life once.
"This just isn't fair," Kazuma grumbled, kicking at a small rock and bouncing it off the cobblestones as he walked down the street. He was in a black mood, and wasn't ready to head back to the mansion. He thought about heading to the Succubus Cafe for a treat, but that just didn't feel right.
Instead, he wandered for a bit, until he found himself outside Wiz's shop. If he remembered right, while she didn't buy him drinks, she always made him tea when he showed up. The shop should have been closed, but there was a light in the window, and the sign said "open" so Kazuma pushed his way in.
"Hey, Wiz, I-"
"Welcome, welcome, valued Customer! What can moi do for thee?"
Kazuma blanched and stopped in the doorway. Instead of Wiz, he found a demon in a pink apron sweeping the sales floor. "Oh, it's you, Vanir. I was looking for Wiz. Nevermind, I'll come back in-"
"No, no! Moi senses a great despair about thee! Moi insists that the young boy who is surrounded by beautiful women and yet escapes all romantic entanglements come in and unburden himself. Moi suspects the foolish goddess is at the root of this."
"You're damn right she is!" Kazuma snapped. Before he knew it, he was sitting at a table with Vanir, who poured him a shot of some sort of dark liquor that smelled like kerosene and burned like it too as Kazuma poured out his frustrations.
"-and that'sh why shomeone should buy ME a *hic* drink!" Kazuma slurred, slamming his shot glass down and wiping his mouth with his sleeve. "If anything, I'm good looking! I'm cute! Why wouldn't a girl want to buy me a drink?! I'm the reason those three are even remotely dateable!"
"The peculiarities of mortal mating rituals largely escape moi, but moi's recollection is that it is the males who are expected to behave as bower birds, and impress mates with displays of wealth," Vanir mused. He hadn't touched a drop of the alcohol, but had happily poured Kazuma as much as he wanted.
"And it'sh not FAIR I shay!" Kazuma hiccuped, spittle spraying across the demon's face.
Vanir was nonplussed, though he did take out a hankie and wipe off his mask. "Indeed. Trite as it is, life is not fair. However…moi could sell you something that is likely to result in a great many drinks being bought for thee."
Kazuma paused at this. "Really?"
"Oh, indeed," Vanir said with a wicked grin. "But moi must warn thee: it will cost far more than the beverages that thee would obtain from potential…suitors."
"It'sh not ABOUT the money!" Kazuma declared, picking up his empty glass and slamming it down again for emphasis. "It's about shending a MESSHAGE!"
Vanir steepled his fingers together, grinning as his eyes glowed an ominous red. "Art thou sure? The path that this will send thee on…moi would not call it a bad end, but then again, moi would not call it a good one. Do you choose this path of petty triumph!"
Kazuma drew himself with all the dignity he could muster. "Damn shtraight! Give to me! I inshisht!"
"Excellent! Moi shall bag it for thee, then! Thy total comes to 1,000,000 eris."
Kazuma handed over the money and waited. After some rummaging, the demon shopkeeper found what he was looking for on a high and dusty shelf, an old wooden casket with a lock in it, about the size of a shoebox. Vanir scrupulously wrapped his present in pink wrapping paper, then tied it with a purple ribbon, before placing the mystery object in a bright robin's egg blue cloth bag with "Shop Smart! Shop Lich Mart!" on it.
"A pleasure doing business with thee, O confused and perplexed Adventurer," Vanir purred, handing over the purchase to Kazuma. "Moi suggests that thou uses it in private first. Thy first steps along this path will be…troubled. MWAHAAHAHAHAH! Oh, what a delicious new venture! Moi eagerly awaits the results! Despair, in such luxurious quantities! Oh, what a farce thou mortals art!"
"Er, thanks." Kazuma shuffled out of the shop. He hastily shredded the overly frilly packaging, dumping the wrappings in a ditch, and tucking the box under his cloak. He shuffled back to the mansion, head spinning slightly. Once in his bedroom, Kazuma had intended to open the box, but instead he passed out fully clothed on his bed.
The next morning, Kazuma's head was pounding so hard he forgot about his purchase. Aqua helpfully healed him, earning her an extra sticker. However, Megumin wasn't about, and even after the healing Kazuma didn't feel like questing.
"Let's just take the day off," Kazuma groaned, massaging his temples.
"But, we haven't missed a day of questing in a week!" Darkness protested. She blushed. "I, er, almost have enough points for advanced swordsmanship…and I wish to know what that will unlock…"
"Oh, go bother Becky and the succubi about it. I'm not in the mood," Kazuma grumbled.
Mortified, Darkness scurried off. As for Aqua, she seemed very happy with her new sticker, which she pasted in her book.
Kazuma went back to bed.
When he woke up, he loafed around the house for a while, all his party members gone. As it went on towards evening, he went back to his room, and noticed the box laying on the floor next to his bed. He picked it up, shaking it, and something rattled inside.
Grunting, Kazuma flipped the latch on the box, as it was unlocked. Inside, he found a belt, with two alchemical symbols on it. He was a bit too muzzly still to puzzle them out, though he knew he should have recognized them.
"So, this thing will get people to buy me drinks? Does it raise my charisma or something?" Kazuma wondered aloud. He shrugged, unbuckled his own belt, and put the new one on.
Immediately, the room spun, and Kazuma flopped down on his bed, dizzy. He nearly puked, but managed to hold it in.
When the room stilled, things looked and felt…odd. The room suddenly seemed oversaturated in the late evening light, as if there were colors there that hadn't been around before. His clothes felt odd on his skin, and they felt way too loose, save for his new belt.
Groaning, Kazuma set up and rubbed his head. He blinked. Something about his balance was off. He got to his feet, and nearly stumbled. His legs didn't seem to be the proper length, and his weight wasn't right. Half tripping, he managed to get over to his stand mirror, where he let out a shriek.
"DAMN YOU, VANIR!"
Kazuma gasped for breath, clutching onto the mirror to stay upright as he looked at himself. Or, perhaps, herself.
A pair of breasts now poked out against Kazuma's tunic, and he now had a rather pronounced set of hips. The shape of his face had completely changed, becoming more delicate. His hair was still the same length, but the rest of him was smaller, and that meant it looked a bit longer, coming down past his ears in a mess.
On instinct, Kazuma immediately clutched his groin and…found that Excalibur was missing. Replaced by shimmering samite, if you will. He shrieked again, then clapped a hand over his mouth.
He would literally die if any of the girls found him like this.
Hurriedly, Kazuma stood, and reached down to take the belt off. Now, the symbols were clear: the Mars and Venus symbols. Currently, the Mars symbol was sunken and dull, while the Venus symbol glowed a soft pink.
Then, Kazuma paused. This was the first time he'd had unrestricted access to a woman's body. Darkness didn't quite count, even that time in the bath.
So instead of taking off the belt, Kazuma took off everything else, and admired herself in the mirror. And Kazuma had to admit: she made a really cute girl. Her boobs were disappointingly small; not flat, but not really big either. Painfully average, really. But nice. And very…interesting…to touch.
Kazuma spent a few more moments exploring her new body, then decided this was best done on the bed. And so, Kazuma did exactly what you think Kazutrash would do in the body of a girl.
After a period of time Kazuma completely lost track of, she lay panting on her now rather mussed blankets, covered in sweat. Sighing, she sat up, looking down at herself. She was a mess. And, it seemed no one else was home. So…
The bath was…interesting. Kazuma figured out how to walk in her new body, and bathing gave a new, fun opportunity for further exploration that resulted in the need to catch her breath again. Then, she sat in the water, scrubbing herself and thinking.
This was too good an opportunity to pass up. So, no one would buy Kazuma Sato a drink? Well, perhaps they would buy Kazuko Suzuki a few ales. She did have to try and get her money back, after all, and Vanir had an extremely strict no refunds policy.
However, there was the problem of clothes. Back in her room, Kazuma regarded her usual outfits. None of them would fit. Not only was she now shorter and less broad across the shoulders, but somehow her hips were wider and her chest was the wrong shape.
Thankfully, Kazuma had taken the Tailor skill as a way to save money on clothing repairs, and to make some light armor. So, with a few quick adjustments, one of the old tunics and hose became a short skirt and leggings. Nodding in approval, Kazuko dressed herself for a night on the town. She ended up having to "borrow" a pair of Megumin's shoes, as those fit her best now.
On the way back to the guild, Kazuma grinned to herself, imagining how she'd snooker all the boys into buying her drinks. Obviously with no intent to do anything but enjoy the free booze, but how hard could it be to get guys to buy you stuff? If someone was willing to buy his party members drinks, they should be willing to buy a sane person some drinks.
"Welcome! If you're here to sign up as Adventurer, come back in the morning," Luna said when Kazuma stepped into the bar, pausing and smiling.
"That's OK, I'm actually an Adventurer already," Kazuma said, giving Luna what she figured was a demure smile.
Luna's eyes narrowed slightly, but then she shrugged. "Well, have a seat, and we can order you a meal, I guess."
Kazuma took a seat, and glanced around. It wasn't hard to spot Aqua, who was performing party tricks in the back as usual. Yunyun and Megumin were in a corner, looking…ashamed? No, it couldn't be. Megumin had never been ashamed in her life. Darkness was sitting with Chris and Taylor again. Kazuma was going to have to see to that stupid crusader. Both of them.
Before one of the guild girls could come over to take her order, a familiar drunken lout staggered over.
"H-Hey, beautiful. Buy me a drink?"
"Get lost, Dust," Kazuma said without thinking.
"Aw, c-come on! I'll pay you back, I promish!" Dust slurred, leaning over to put an arm around Kazuma's shoulders, and bathing her in his rather foul breath.
"Oh back off, I know you're broke! I'm VERY much not interested," Kazuma said, shoving Dust's arm away.
Dust frowned. "H-hey, that's not real-URK!"
Rin, Dust's minder and party member, grabbed him by the collar and yanked him back. "Dust! Don't scare her off! We need more adventurers here. Go bother someone else."
"Aww, Rin, come on! I-I'm broke -hic- and thishty! Ya gotta help a guy out," Dust whined.
"Oh, go buy yourself a drink," Rin sighed, giving Dust a few eris.
With that, the happy idiot tottered off to go badger someone else. Probably for a quick dice game, considering his history.
"Thanks, I appreciate it," Kazuma said, but was surprised when Rin sat down next to her.
"Yeah, he's not such a bad guy, pretty reliable in a party, but he sadly lacks anything approaching social graces if it doesn't involve monster slaying," Rin sighed, shrugging. She gave Kazuma a somewhat self effacing smile. "Well, what brings you here? I'm Rin, by the way, I'm a mage in that idiot's party."
"Kazuko Suzuki. I'm from out of town. I heard Axel was, er, looking for good Adventurers," Kazuma lied. Really? Rin was going to sit with her? That was going to kill all the opportunities for drinks!
"Oh? Your name sounds foreign…are you from…what's the place? Jap-on? There's a couple of people around from there."
"Er, yes, I'm from Japan. I think I've heard of one of them, he's pretty famous," Kazuma said, thinking of herself. Actually, that was a bit odd. When had she started thinking of herself instead of himself?
"Oh, you're after Mitsurugi?" Rin gave Kazuma a pitying look, and put a hand on her arm. "I hate to break it to you sweetie, but he's not going to be interested in you."
"What!? I-"
Before Kazuma could explain that she didn't care about Mitsumoto, someone slid onto the bench across from her and Rin.
"My my, what are a couple of cuties doing here all by your lonesome? Romantic troubles?" Cecily asked in chipper tones.
Rin gave the other woman a flat look. "No, just talking. What are you selling?"
"Me? Oh, nothing! I was just thinking that the two of you looked sad and lonely, and needed someone to brighten up your day!" Cecily burbled. "But, if you need some help in romance, I have a sure fire way to make it so that all the rich boys, or, perhaps, cute girls, are interested in you!"
"We're not interested," Kazuma and Rin said in unison.
"Ah, but you haven't heard the best part! If you join the Axis Cult now, you get this free, edible soap! It's mint flavored!" Cecily laughed, and pulled out a bar of green soap and a familiar looking form.
"Unless the Axis Cult has a way to get back at annoying demon shopkeepers, or get me free drinks, I'm not interested," Kazuma said flatly.
"Oh ho! Well, the Axis Cult has WAYS of dealing with pesky demons! We're world renowned demon slayers! And, of course, as the goddess of water, Lady Aqua has the most delicious of wines and ales brewed in her monasteries! I would be happy to take you to a convent, sweetie!" Cecily said, licking her lips and leering at Kazuma.
For some reason, that both flustered and embarrassed Kazuma. Wasn't this what she wanted?
"No, actually, Rin was going to introduce me to Mitsuragi, who's from my homeland," Kazuma sniffed.
"Oh, him? He's a real prize! I already got him to sign up for the cult! He's rich, too! I just know he'll fall for my feminine wiles, and buy me a nice home and pamper me while he goes far away on adventurers," Cecily sighed, fluttering her eyelashes. Then she suddenly leered at Kazuma. "But, I'd be happy to let you stay in my bed whenever he's not home. I'll put up with him when I have to, but absent, rich husbands are the best sort!"
"Er…" Kazuma leaned back, rather uncertain what to do.
Rin was a lot more direct, standing and tugging Kazuma to her feet. "Get lost, gold digger. Besides, Mitsurugi is as uninterested in you as you apparently are in him. But, maybe he'd like to talk to someone from his home town. Come on, Kazuko."
"Well, if he's not into you, you can always come and cry on my shoulder!" Cecily said, waving cheerily.
Mitubishi turned out to be in the back, surrounded by a group of beautiful girls, his two hangers on literally holding on to his arms and glaring at the other girls. He seemed to be ignoring them though, as he was watching Aqua perform her party tricks.
"Oh, Sir Mitsurugi, tell us about the time you slew a dragon!"
"Er, well, it wasn't that impressive, and I'm sure Fio and Clemea could tell you, they were there."
"Oh, they don't want to hear, these hussies just want you to buy them drinks," one of the two said. Kazuma had no idea if she were Fio and Clemea, and honestly didn't care.
"Oh, drinks? Well, I suppose I could buy a round," Mitsurugi said with a shrug. He handed some coins to one of his party members. "Here, get us a round, Clemea."
"I'm Fio," she muttered, but then smiled and nodded. "Yes, of course! And for you?"
"Oh, anything is fine," Mitsurugi said with a shrug, and went back to watching Aqua's performance.
"Hey, Mitsurugi, this is Kazuko, she says she's from Japan," Rin said. "I was wondering if you knew her."
Mitsurugi's head snapped around, and when he saw Kazuma, he immediately stood and bowed. "Kon'nichiwa, Kazuko-san. Mitsuru gito mōshimasu. Dōhō ni o ai dekite kōeidesu."
Kazuma sighed, but bowed. Pompous formal ass. "Hajimemashite Mitsurugi-san. Zan'nen'nagara watashi wa saikin nakunatte shimattanode, o sake o nominagara dōhō to kōryū shitai to omotte imashita."
"Oh! Of course! Tell me, was it Lady- No. We must speak in private! Oh, Miss Luna! I require a private room, and a bottle of your finest wine," Mitsurugi said, raising a hand.
Luna looked up from behind the bar and smiled. "Oh, of course Sir Mitsurugi! Is there anything else?"
"Hmm, some Fried Frog's legs, please." Mitsurugi turned to Kazuma and blushed. "They are, ah, a bit like Chicken Katsu. Do not be put off."
"Well, if you're buying, I'm eating," Kazuma said, fighting back a smug grin. Getting this asshole to buy her drinks? Oh, this was almost worth the million eris price tag, and the weird situation on its own.
The other girls glared daggers at Kazuma as Mitsurugi led her away, and she stuck her tongue out and flipped them off, leading to squawks of outrage as she followed after the dumbass.
Cecily, however, pumped her fist and gave Kazuma a big thumbs up, hurrying over to whisper in her ear.
"Hey, just make sure you don't offer too much! But if there are any accidents, the Axis Cult is here to help! But don't worry: Lady Aqua approves of all love! Even one night stands."
"Er, thanks, but it's just drinks between fellow countrymen," Kazuma said, wrinkling her nose.
"Hey, nothing wrong with getting a mark to buy you some drinks! Have you ever thought of becoming a priestess?" Cecily suddenly ran her hand down Kazuma's side and over her hip. "Our training is…hands on…"
"I, er, gotta…" Kazuma slipped away from Cecily, blushing. She wasn't into forward women! Well, maybe a little. But right now: Sweet revenge!
"So, where in Japan are you from? I'm from Tokyo, Edogawa Ward," Mitsurgi said, popping the cork on the wine as they sat at a small table in the private dining room, a plate of steaming frogs legs nearby.
"Oh, I'm from Nagano. I was just so surprised to be isekai'd like in light novels!" Kazuma said in his best impression of Aqua.
"Ah, yes. A shock. But, I do my duty," Mitsurugi said, pouring the wine. He paused. "Kazuma Sato…he is also from Nagano. Do you know him?"
"He's my cousin," Kazuma said with a shrug. "Nice guy, he was really bullied at school. He here too?"
"Yes, I haven't seen him. That…well. We have something of a rivalry for Lady Aqua's…patronage."
"The bluenette? Trying to get into her pants?" Kazuma asked, taking a long drink of the wine. It was actually rather sweet, as good as the really nice stuff Aqua bought, or better even.
"What?! She's a goddess! A kami, a true deity! No, I wish to worship her, and treat her as is proper! If I were to get into someone's pants, it would be…never mind. No. This is a new world, a new life! I will have honor, this time," Mitsurugi said, downing his own glass of wine, and pouring for them both again.
He prattled on, asking about the goddess who Kazuma had seen (she described Eris, who Mitsurugi dismissed, the moron) and details about life in Japan.
Kazuma hadn't really ever talked with Matsumoto before aside from their various spats, so she mostly just told the truth about things. She hadn't really paid attention to the news, but the series Mitsuragi asked about…he must have thought she was a fujoshi, because it was all yaoi.
"I was more of a yuri fan girl," Kazuma said, making a face.
"Oh? Are you…into women?" Mitsurugi asked, looking a bit worried.
Kazuma fluttered her eyelashes and leaned on Mitsurugi. "Well, I'm in a private room with you, aren't I? Maybe some more wine, and food?"
"I…of course! Yes! More wine!" Mitsurugi hurried out, and was gone for a long time.
That was fine with Kazuma, who just gorged on the frogs legs and drank the last drops of wine. She was just about ready to leave when the oaf came back with two more bottles and another plate of food, this time fresh coleslaw, which was pretty delicious.
"You know, the vegetables here are alive," Mitsurugi babbled, pouring another glass.
Kazuma let out a hiccup and a giggle. "You don't say…"
They went through another bottle of wine, and Kazuma felt deliciously drunk. Really, Mitsubashi wasn't such a bad guy! He was pretty funny, and now that Kazuma thought about it, rather handsome too! What a swell guy! They'd have to hang out more, if he bought Kazuma more amazing wine and food!
Things got hazy, but somehow, Kazuma ended up in Mitsurugi's private rooms. Something about a bath? They bathed together, and it was pretty great. Mitsurugi washed Kazuma's back, so she washed his, and then, things got even hazier, and Kazuma ended up back in his room, in his bed…and…
Kazuma awoke with a start, feeling sick, and not just from the hangover. It was daylight, late morning, by the look of the sun in the window, and she was NAKED, and in MITSURUGI'S BED!
HAD SHE JUST LOST HER VIRGINITY AS A GIRL, AND TO A BOY?! THIS WAS A DISASTER! SHE WAS GOING TO HAVE TO COMMIT SEPPUKU, AND-
There was crying, and Kazuma drew the covers up around her. She looked over to see a naked Mitsurugi sitting in a chair by the bed, weeping.
"WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME!?" Kazuma hissed, ready to murder this asshole, and then herself.
"I'm sorry!" Mitsurugi sobbed, tears and snot streaming down his face.
Oh, he was going to be sorry, alright! Kazuma was going to-
"I tried, I really did! But look!" Mitsurugi gestured to himself, and Kazuma was doubly ready to commit murder. He would be bigger than her! Him. WHATEVER, WHERE WAS CHUNCHUNMARU!?
"I couldn't even get it up with a beautiful girl who looks like Kazuma," Mitsurugi sobbed. "I just…I can't do it! It's all my fault! I'm sorry, I just…I thought, in a new world…I was reborn…surely…surely I wouldn't shame my family this time…"
Kazuma blinked. Wait, was he… "You're gay?!"
Mitsurugi moaned and sobbed, but nodded. "I…yes. I'm sorry, Kazuko, I-"
"What, am I not good enough for you?!" Kazuma demanded, throwing off the blankets and standing up. She was pretty hot, if she would say so herself! Not Darkness levels of lewd, or as cute as Megumin, or as perfect as Aqua, but dammit, she wasn't ugly!
"No woman is…not…not even Aqua-sama could cure me…" Mitsurugi groaned. "Please…just…go…"
Sniffing in outrage, Kazuma got dressed. Not that she actually wanted to sleep with this jerk. It was the principle of the thing. Still, she felt…dirty. And undesirable. Even as a girl, she couldn't get laid.
Kazuma stalked out to the guild hall, where several of the guild girls looked up. Some jealous, some disgusted, others curious.
Felmia and Cio glared daggers, of course, but Kazuma stalked up to them, planting her hands on her hips. "He's gay."
Both girls blinked. "What?"
"I wasn't good enough for him, so you damn well wouldn't be either. He's not into me, or any other women. Get over it. He's just not that into you," Kazuma snapped. Then she stalked out of the guildhall, which erupted in conversation.
Kazuma headed back towards the mansion, then realized what she was doing. She activated Lurk, then snuck in the back way. There was no way she was getting caught by her party members.
Once in her room, having avoided a snoring Aqua, the others weren't around, Kazuma went into her room and undressed. After one more…ahem, experience, and admiring herself in the mirror, she reached down and tried to tug off the belt.
It didn't give.
Kazuma tried harder, but still, no luck. She resorted to trying to saw it off with a knife, and only got a shallow cut on her leg for her troubles. Now truly in a state of panic, Kazuma sat down and cried for a bit. This was horrible!
After a good cry, Kazuma thought to herself. The belt had come from Wiz's shop, which meant it was probably horribly cursed somehow. She could go ask Vanir…but that would mean admitting what had happened to that damned demon. The other option was getting the curse or whatever it was broken. Aqua could do that…but Aqua must NEVER know.
So, Kazuma got dressed, and snuck out of the mansion. She was tempted to head for the Erisite Church…but there were too many people there. Instead, she headed for the dilapidated shrine just outside of town.
While the shrine was still rather run down, but the statue of Aqua was no longer covered in moss and bird droppings, and actually sparkled in the sunlight. The pool was clear and had some goldfish in it, and the shrine had undergone some repairs and actually looked a little livable. Out front, Cecily was humming to herself and sweeping. Instead of her nun outfit, she was wearing a simple skirt and had her hair put up in a blue headscarf.
She looked up and saw Kazuma hurrying over, and a different sort of look passed over the nun's features. Pity? She set down the broom and hurried over to the distraught Kazuma.
Before Kazuma could speak, Cecily sprang forward, wrapping her arms around Kazuma. "I told you to be careful, sister. But, it's OK. Even if you had a fling, and he just used you and left you, Aqua still loves and accepts you. I still love and accept you. And in the Axis Cult, we don't judge people for having one night stands."
"That's not- I didn't," Kazuma sputtered.
Cecily stepped back, holding on to Kazuma's shoulders and giving her a pitying look. "You don't need to lie. Like I said: all love is good in Aqua's eyes, even if he didn't love you."
"NO! He's gay!" Kazuma said, then burst into tears. More because she was afraid she'd be stuck like this forever, but also because of the trauma of almost sleeping with a boy. Especially Mitsumoto! Even Dust would be better!
Well, maybe not Dust. Taylor, maybe.
"Oh. Oh, sweetheart…" Cecily sighed. "Look, you shouldn't judge a man…but I understand the rejection…it happened to me when I figured out what I was…that's why I got sent to the convent, and, well, I ran away from those Erisite Jerks, and I found Lady Aqua! But she loves Mitsurugi too!"
"Fat chance, she thinks the asshole's annoying, just like me," Kazuma muttered.
Cecily paused, and a suspicious look entered her eyes. "Wait…do you…know?"
"YES I KNOW! I'M KAZUMA! I GOT CURSED!" she exploded. "AND I CAN'T LET THAT USELESS GODDESS KNOW I GOT TURNED INTO A GIRL!"
Cecily blinked. "Wait, you're the Otherworlder who- Huh. Well, I mean, honestly, you're better off now, honey! Girl's rock! The sex is way better, trust me."
That made Kazuma blush. "I've had lots of sex as a boy!"
"Ah, wanted to try it as a girl, and Mitsurugi turned you down? Eh, it's not too late, you could still get laid," Cecily said with a shrug. "Come on in. I needed to talk to you anyway, Zesta's orders. And this way, it's even more fun! You're way cuter like this!"
Rather baffled, Kazuma followed Cecily inside, where the priestess made some tea, and set a cup in front of Kazuma before sitting herself. "So, you're stuck as a girl?"
"Yes, and I want to get unstuck! It's this belt! It's cursed!" Kazuma said, pointing. "Now, can you help me or not? And you have to swear to tell NO ONE!"
"Hmm. Well, stand up and come over here," Cecily ordered.
Blushing, Kazuma hastily set the tea down and stood. Cecily inspected the belt, pursing her lips. She did a couple of spells, and nodded. "Yep, definitely cursed. I can probably figure out a counter curse, but it might take a bit."
"What?! No! I have to change back, as soon as possible! What if people figure out what happened?!" Kazuma gasped.
"Well, you could always hide here!" Cecily giggled. "I'd like a cutie like you to stick around!"
Kazuma blushed and folded her arms under her breasts.
"Oh, fine, be that way. Hmm. Well, we can try the Sacred Bath. The Shrine's Waters can break minor curses," Cecily offered.
Kazuma flushed. "You're just trying to get me naked!"
"Of course!" Cecily laughed. When Kazuma looked hurt, she sighed. "And the waters really can break curses. Come on, you'd have to be naked for me to get that belt off you, unless you want to hurt yourself in those clothes when you change back. They aren't cursed."
"Oh, right…"
Somewhat reluctantly, Kazuma followed Cecily to a chamber at the back of the shrine, where there was actually a small hot spring. Blushing, Kazuma put her arms around herself, glancing at Cecily. "Er, are you…?"
"If it will make you feel better, I'll get naked too," Cecily teased.
Despite being rather weird and insane by virtue of the fact that she actually thought Aqua was worthy of worship, Cecily was actually a knockout, with an amazing figure, great hair, and deep blue eyes. Kazuma swallowed and licked her lips.
"Oh? Interested? Well, just remember, I like you better this way," Cecily laughed, and then pulled off her blouse.
Kazuma's eyes nearly bugged out of her head as Cecily then kicked off her shoes, then pulled off her skirt. She wasn't wearing a bra, and while her panties were just plain blue ones with yellow Axis cult symbols on them, Cecily took those off rather casually as well.
"Your turn! Need some help? Cecily offered, posing with her hips cocked to one side, one hand on her head, the other on her waist.
"No! No, I got it!" hastily, Kazuma scrambled out of her clothes, though obviously the belt didn't come off.
Kazuma stepped into the pool and sank down into the water, somewhat embarrassed. Cecily slid in beside her, smiling.
"Been awhile since I had a bath with a cutie like you!"
"Um, yes, I ah…" Kazuma's mind went blank as Cecily scooted over, her hip brushing Kazuma's own.
"Oh, don't be nervous. You've had sex with lots of girls, right? Just as a boy," Cecily purred. "Surely I'm not the first naked women you've seen…"
"No! Of course not! I-I live with three hot girls!" Kazuma babbled.
"Mmm, I'm jealous," Cecily said, drawing Kazuma close with an arm around her shoulders. "But surely you wouldn't sully our goddess, would you?"
"I, er, well, um, she's more of a friend…"
"Oh? Well, that's OK. Mmm. Your skin, it's so soft! Hmm, that belt, it's a bit weird. Should I get it off?" Cecily asked, sliding one leg around Kazuma, then pulling her in close. Kazuma could feel Cecily's breasts pressing into her back, and she moaned slightly.
"Well, it's rather stuck," Cecily said, running one hand along the belt. "Ah, all one piece, no way to get it off…"
Cecily's hand reached the belt buckle, then slid between Kazuma's legs.
Involuntarily, Kazuma spread her legs a bit wider, breathing faster.
"Mmm, yes, there is an opening there…" Cecily's lips brushed the back of Kazuma's neck, and she gasped, then turned her head, her lips finding Cecily's own.
The kiss was Kazuma's first, Cecily's tongue probing her mouth, and lasting quite long. Cecily's other hand began to cup and caress Kazuma's breasts, her other hand moving urgently. Kazuma leaned into it, rocking her body in a strange rhythm.
After a bit, Cecily lifted Kazuma out of the bath and put her on the edge of it, and began to kiss new places. Kazuma rode a wave of pleasure unlike anything she'd ever experienced before, feeling both odd and wonderful.
After a time, Cecily got out of the bath and kissed Kazuma, then whispered in her ear, "Your turn."
It wasn't that hard to mimic what Cecily had done, especially not with her urging and guidance. When Kazuma finished, she kissed Cecily on the lips, and then embraced.
"Mmm, you're good, cutie," Cecily said, playfully nipping at Kazuma's ear. "I think you should just stay like this…"
"N-No. The…the belt," Kazuma gasped.
Cecily sighed, then got up. She toweled off and got dressed, then put a finger to the belt buckle.
"Remove Curse."
The belt snapped open, and dizziness washed over Kazuma. When it was over, he looked down at himself, and breathed a sigh of relief. The room looked…well, washed out. And that wonderful feeling was completely gone.
Kazuma tried to get dressed, but everything didn't fit now. He ended up finding an old stained robe in the corner, and throwing that on, hiding the clothes in a laundry hamper. Outside, he found Cecily sweeping the porch.
"I, er…um…that was…"
Cecily looked up, then shrugged. "It was good. Great even! But, well, now you're a boy again. Come back some other time and we can talk about Aqua."
Awkwardly, Kazuma stepped in closer, to try and hug Cecily, or even kiss her, but she fended him off with a palm.
"Sorry, bud. But unless you're a rich guy who's going to pamper me, I'm not really interested. And even then only when I had to. Kazuko the cute girl? I'll have fun with her any time! But Kazuma? No thanks."
"Oh, I um…"
"Where's the belt, by the way?" Cecily asked. "Maybe I'll give it a try!"
"No! It's mine, I bought it!" Kazuma snapped. He had the belt wrapped in a towel and hidden in the sleeve of his robe. No way he was giving it up.
"Suit yourself. But, why don't you bring it next time? Who knows! Maybe something fun will happen!" and with that, Cecily went back into the shrine.
Kazuma stood awkwardly on the doorstep for a few minutes, then went back to the mansion, feeling very confused.
Author's Note:
Special thanks to the poor fools who voted for this on my discord. You can join in the madness with this secret key: /Qj7cGXqwA5