This chapter has been edited by my wonderful beta-reader BrownB.

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Usagi couldn't focus her mind.

Her eyes somehow, although shut tightly, were rotating and the dark world around her was spinning.

She couldn't feel anything, anything at all, except for his tight grasp on her waist, his hold on her right hand and his hot breath against her neck.

She opened her eyes, only a little bit and all she could see was darkness.

The sun had set an hour ago and the park was dead silent, save for the occasional car sounds from afar, and the tree leaves rustling. The grass must have been watered not too long ago as she could feel the dampness under her legs.

She had gone to a fortuneteller a while back; Rei had insisted that the woman in the weird yellow costume with all those fake jewelries was good at what she did. Usagi was wary of going, but Rei could be very persuasive...and scary; and at the end of the day, Usagi only wanted to make Rei happy, because she never believed in stuff like that. But the woman had shared some intimate information with her; telling her all the little things Usagi had always kept to herself, things that she was unable to share even with her best friends

"I can see it in your eyes," the woman had said after Usagi's question, with a touch of a blush against her pale cheeks, about whether she was destined for love, "it is not destiny when you find "it", you need to choose, and that choice might be a heavy burden on you." Usagi's eyes had widened with confusion. "I think she's a little coo-coo," she had declared after they had stepped out of the woman's tent with Rei and Minako, "I don't even know what she meant."

But even if that ridiculous fortuneteller had told her that in a near future she would find herself one day, lying on her back on Chiba Mamoru's school jacket, on damp grass, while he hovered on top of her, kissing her as if her kisses could right all the wrong in his life, she would have laughed while pointing a mocking finger at her. Rei and her stupid beliefs be damned, she was going to laugh for days. Because, seriously, how stupid was that notion? Why would Chiba Mamoru want to kiss her, in a public place no less, like this? This feverish, this passionate. And why, oh God why, would she let him?

Usagi winced a little when some of her hair got stuck under Mamoru's elbow as he ducked his head lower to kiss down her throat, all the way to the small opening of her V-neck blouse.

"You're not very responsive," Mamoru murmured against her collarbone. Usagi stayed silent. Her left arm was tucked under Mamoru's elbow, while her right arm was above her head, her tiny hand seized by his larger one.

Mamoru lifted himself a little, so he could look at her face. Her head was turned the other side, golden hair spread all over the place, lips dry and swollen and so kissable. The sight of her twisted something in him, something very unknown and alien. He stared at her for a moment longer, "look at me," he said as he reached out and pushed strays of silky hair away from her face.

Usagi finally opened her eyes, and looked at his face, and for a moment, she was at a loss for words. Because, what was there to say, really? Thank you for neglecting my wishes from the other night and stalk me again? Thank you for dragging me into the park, even though I told you that we shouldn't? Thank you for ravishing me in the middle of a public place, even with no people around? Or maybe, just maybe I should thank you for taking my breath away every time I see your eyes? Oh shut up, she smacked herself internally.

So she said nothing, instead, she just stared at him with a passive expression, even though her chest was heaving with uneven breaths and her eyes were glossy with the intensity of his kisses.

"Where were you these past couple of days?" Mamoru asked as he kept staring into her eyes. Usagi just shrugged as best as she could, given her current position, and then looked away again.

"Cat got your tongue? Say something," he said, half demanding. He adjusted his weight on his elbow so he could see her better. She looked so small and vulnerable beneath him, and recognizing her helplessness, his eyes lost their previous frustration.

Usagi took a deep breath while closing her eyes, just for a moment, before opening them and glaring at him once more. "What do you want me to say?" she said, with obvious anger, "whatever I say falls on deaf ears. How many times I have to tell you that I don't want to do this anymore?" she hissed, but did nothing to push him away or try to free herself from his grasp.

"I didn't see you complaining just a moment ago," Mamoru smirked and touched her face again. The venom in Usagi's glare didn't falter and as soon as she slapped his hand away, he too started glaring back, "what is your problem?" he asked angrily. As if it wasn't bad enough that a girl, and a very small one at that, had dared to push him away, but to know that he wouldn't retort back in anyway was even more annoying. "Don't play with fire Odango," he said as he watched Usagi finally recoiling herself from him and trying to stand on her feet.

"Don't threaten me Mamoru-baka, I'm not afraid of you," she shot back. She tried to stand as tall as she could, holding her chin up, pushing out her small chest and adjusting the roundness of her shoulders so they would look more agile.

Mamoru looked at her from his place on the pavement and then threw his head back and started laughing; one of those two seconds laugh that she had always witnessed from far away.

Usagi looked at him confused, before anger stirred in her once more. "Are you laughing at me?" she asked, as she put her hands on her hips and tried to throw daggers at him with her eyes.

Mamoru leaned back on his hands, still situated on the ground in front of her and stretched out his long legs, "I am," he said and then smirked against the look on her face.

"You're such a jerk Mamoru-baka," Usagi cried. She always made it a point to try not to let Mamoru get under her skin whenever they met, and every time she would loose her cool faster than lightning.

"And you're such a hypocrite Odango," Mamoru said while starting to get up, dragging his school jacket with him, now damp with the moist of the grass.

"I'm a hypocrite? I'M A HYPOCRITE?" Usagi's voice rose with each word. She didn't like the fact that Mamoru was finally standing up; she didn't appreciate the fact that now she had to tilt her head up so she could see his face. She didn't like to be intimidated.

"You are a hypocrite, and keep your voice down," Mamoru hissed and then reached in his pants' pocket and took out his cigarette pack.

Usagi looked at him with widened eyes. She watched in a haze as his hands took out a small cigarette and started lighting the small beast. She watched in fascination as her own hand raised and slapped everything out of Mamoru's grasp.

Mamoru didn't lose his cool, he simply looked at her with blank eyes, and... "you're such a child Odango,"

"Don't call me a child."

"I'll call you whatever I want."

Usagi whirled around and took a few steps away from him, before she stood still, her whole body shaking with anger and frustration. "Why am I a hypocrite?" she asked him, even though she had a very good sense of what he meant. She turned around again and met his stare. He was now leaning against a tree trunk behind him, hands deep in his pocket. He hadn't even bother picking up his fallen possessions.

"You do this every time Odango," he said, "you act as if I try to take away something from you by force, when in reality, you enjoy it as much as I do," he kept looking at her with that annoying blank stare. Oh how she hated that look.

"It is by force, and no, I do not enjoy it one bit, what makes you think that I enjoy it you conceited jerk?" Usagi fumed with anger. She placed her hands on her hips once more and glared at him with all her might. She could just imagine the image she was representing him right then; hair buns disheveled due to their recent activity, her white shirt was probably all wrinkly and she could still feel the dampness of the grass on her back, even though Mamoru had made it a point to lay out his jacket for her before leading her down on the ground.

"So what you're saying is that you didn't enjoy it?" Mamoru asked with a sudden calmness that shook Usagi to her core. His tone just seemed so cold, and...so...so...cold.

"I am saying exactly that," she countered back, although her tone had lost a specific level of anger now.

Mamoru pushed himself off the tree and took one step towards her, "so...you don't enjoy it when I kiss you?" he asked again, in the exact same tone.

"I am telling you that not only I don't enjoy them, but I want them to stop. I don't want you to come near me, or touch me, or..." her voice trailed off as soon as she saw a flash of something dangerous in his eyes. For a moment, she could swear that the rich blue of his eyes had turned a perilous shade of black.

"So...if you hate them this much, why not pushing me away? Why lay there and let me have my way?" he said as he fixed his eyes on her.

Usagi felt a lump formed in her throat, and she didn't know whether she should associate it with the upcoming cold she could feel in her body, or the man in front of her. She just looked at him again, eyes wary of any reasonable answer.

"What happened again? Don't become a mute now Odango, you were just so full of words a moment ago," Mamoru said in a mocking voice.

Usagi kept staring at him, not daring to speak up. Because the reality was that he was right. If she really didn't want him, she could have easily pushed him away. Chiba Mamoru was a lot of things, but sexual assault just wasn't his thing. In all those moments of passion, he had always given her a way out. He had always kept his firm grip on her loose enough, so she'd be able to free herself. So why was she acting as if he was hurting her? Why was she saying such none sense?

And then something clicked... She couldn't see it before because she had been so consumed with confusion and frustration that her mind wasn't able to function properly; because he was hurting her. He hurt her every time he would look at her with an apathetic look as if he didn't know her. As if her existence didn't matter...he hurt her every time she saw him walk into the arcade, flirting his way with every living female in that place...charming the pants off those other girls... while ignoring her...and it hurt...really bad. And his Goddamn excuses for not wanting anyone to see them together, saying that it was dangerous, for her, was just pure bullshit.

"Well I'm telling you now Mamoru...stay away from me," Usagi said in a low tone; damn her weak heart and her weaker voice. Why couldn't she stand up to him like she had done to Yoshiro? Why couldn't she just slap that stupid look on his face and run the other direction?

"I don't want to associate with you Mamoru, I don't want to ruin my reputation...do you not get that?" she finally looked up and met his eyes and she froze mid-sentence. The intensity of his stare was just too much. What was with her and those eyes?

"Don't flatter yourself Odango, it's not like I'm falling on my knees to have your attention," he said as he straightened his shoulders that made him look even taller. This little girl was getting on his last nerve, with her sudden mood changes and the fact that she always managed to leave him with a measured level of yearning.

"Oh really?" Usagi's anger roared back and she couldn't hold her tongue anymore, "if I'm not mistaken, I wasn't the one hurriedly dragging myself into the park just a little while ago, now was I? It wasn't me who dragged me to the alley behind the arcade on several occasions I may add...and now your telling me that you don't want my attention? That's just hilarious Mamoru," she let out a frustrated laugh.

And he went to say something, and she felt as panic rose within her...because his retorts always managed to crush her; they always managed to stir something awful in her. And she was desperate to protect her fragile heart; she could feel them...those tiny cracks were on the verge of breaking.

And the best defense was always a good offence.

"You know what," she hissed, "the hell with it, you don't want my attention and I sure as hell don't want yours, so do us both a favor Chiba and stay away from me," she nearly screamed. All the hurt he had caused her, all the accusations Yoshiro had made, and all those concerned looks her friends have been throwing her way came back to life. She just wanted to go back to her old routine. She wanted to know that she could enjoy her time at the arcade, with her friends, with Motoki and Unazuki...without the fear of knowing that he would be there, and his mere presence would cause a silly excitement in her heart that she didn't want and was not even allowed to feel.

Mamoru didn't lose his cool while Usagi threw word after word of insults at him. He just stared at her "Mamoru style" and then once she was over with her rant, he simply bent down and retrieved his cigarette and lighter, holding them in one hand, while his other hand held his school jacket.

"Fine..." he said.

And something broke in Usagi and she wished to the Gods above to let it be anything but her heart.

She didn't expect him to have a rant of his own because knowing Chiba Mamoru, she knew that just wasn't his style. She didn't even expect him to try to reason with her, like he had done that night outside of her house. "I don't want you to get into my world, because the only time that I can escape it...is when I'm with you," he had said that night. So why was he acting like this now? All he had to say against her long speech was..."fine"?

And Usagi might have been a lot of things; a crybaby, a klutz who would trip over her own two feet now and then, an occasional lazy head who couldn't get out of the bed at a proper time, but she was not a pushover. She wouldn't let Mamoru's devastating indifference influence her mind...and her heart. And she sure as hell wouldn't let him take pleasure in seeing her down.

"Fine," came her response. For a moment, they just stared at each other, a blank expression apparent on both their young faces. And they both kept their quiet...there was no room for more words.

"Well then...goodbye," Usagi said as she turned around and started walking away.

She could hear his footsteps behind her, from a distance, and she knew he wouldn't let her walk all the way to her house alone at night.

But she never turned around to look at him, and he never called out to her. They just walked, several steps away from each other.

And Usagi had to wonder how long it would take her tears to break free and expose the turmoil inside.

For the next few days, Usagi avoided the arcade like the plague. She kept declining her friends' request to go and have a "chill out" session. She wanted to be among friends, needed to be among friends, but she didn't know whether she could bear seeing him anymore.

So she stayed away. She tried to make different excuses to her friends; telling Ami that she wanted to study more, reasoned with Minako that she didn't want to come out during the week so she could enjoy having late night rendezvous with her on the weekend instead; manipulating Makoto that she would sell her soul to hang out at her place and devour the items of her fridge instead of playing the new Sailor V game.

And going to the shrine was always a pleasant outing for the girls. Their time spent with Rei at her small room at the far corner of the Haiden was not just a temporization, but a valuable get together, "so why not spend more time here?" Usagi said to Rei, "why should we go to the arcade? You said it yourself that all of our monthly allowances are going straight to trash," she looked at her as if her decision of not going to that place was Rei's recommendation.

Rei had only stared at her, with one raised eyebrow and a definite look of "yeah, like I'm going to believe that".

But none of them questioned her decision and the loyal friends they were, they only obliged her wishes and started going to places other than the arcade. Their time spent at their most favorite game center was minimized to when Usagi wasn't there. And the gift of having Usagi smile like that, with less worry in her blue orbs, was incomparable to anything else; especially hanging out at a silly little place like the arcade.

So Usagi's days were brighter now, with less anxiety and hindrance; and even though she could at least enjoy her time without her eyes drifting around, always searching, that specific ache in her heart could only be ignored to some extent.

It was just difficult to avoid the arcade all together; after all, the easiest way to get to the Hikawa Shrine was to pass the arcade to the main street, and Makoto's house wasn't really that far from it either.

So Usagi passed the arcade every day for a whole week, either among friends or alone. And every time she tried so hard to avoid peeking in. She tried hard to occupy her eyes with something else, anything else, so they wouldn't wonder around. She didn't want her eyes to search for that familiar tussled ebony hair; and God forbid them being settled on those piercing blue eyes...

So she turned her head away every time she passed the place, and therefore, totally missed his absolute absence.

She also missed the confused and longing stares a certain arcade owner threw her way through the glassy door.

"Hey."

Usagi was in her own little world when she heard him and for a moment she was startled. But his warm voice always had the ability to calm her nerves, and knowing that she would soon be greeted with those caring eyes was that much more appealing.

"Motoki-kun, hi...what are you doing here?" she asked, as she watched him settle on the bench beside her.

"I was just on my way home when I saw you sitting here alone. How are you?" he asked while smiling at her with tenderness. He couldn't get over the fact that he hadn't seen her for almost 10 days, and given Usagi's constant presence at his work place for almost a year, this new routine was just unfamiliar to him.

"I'm fine...how about yourself? How come you're going home right now? Aren't you working today?" Usagi asked, and then bent down to put away her manga in her school bag.

"Unazuki is working my shift today, I have to study a bit," Motoki stated and then stretched his legs for more comfort. He had settled his school bag on the bench, with his jacket on top.

They sat in silence for a few moments, both seemingly lost in their own worlds. The sound of the water fountain in front of them was soothing. The light afternoon breeze was refreshing and Usagi couldn't help but let out a small happy sigh as she closed her eyes and cherished the remarkable feeling she had.

"Where have you been Usagi? Why haven't you come to the arcade?" came Motoki's voice. Usagi took a deep breath before she opened her eyes. She looked down at her hands that were clasped on her lap before looking up and at the older boys' questioning stare.

"I've...just been...busy I guess," she answered with uncertainty. Lying to the girls was one thing, but concealing the truth in front of Furuhata Motoki was a whole different story, and Usagi truly dreaded the fact that his eyes instantly narrowed with disbelief.

"You've been busy? Doing what?" he asked as he draped his arm on the back of the bench, leaning in just a little towards the teenager.

Usagi could feel her cheeks turn red with embarrassment. "Just stuff, you know, school and...stuff."

"Usagi, it's me. You know you can always talk to me...and plus...you know you're a horrible liar, right?" his tone turned into one of amusement when uttering those words, and Usagi was grateful that he wasn't interrogating her with seriousness.

"But I was busy...I mean...I can't really come to the arcade a lot anymore," she turned sideways to where Motoki was sitting and tried to give the best puppy dog eyes she could manage.

"Uh...there it is," Motoki chuckled and ran a light hand through his dirty-blond hair.

"What is?"

"That look...you want me to drop this conversation...but you know what, it won't work on me this time Tsukino Usagi, because whether you believe it or not, I've missed you so much this past week, and I really want to know why you are staying away."

Usagi's eyes widened, not because of what he said, it's just that his tone was so...affectionate.

She didn't know what to say, she glanced at the water fountain and sighed. "I know you have, I've missed you too," she said after a few moments of silence.

Motoki watched her as she squirmed on her seat a little and shifted her body further away from him. "Hey," he said as he reached out his hand and took her tiny hand in his, he could feel how her skin jumped at his touch, and he could also feel the coldness her fingers were emitting; the need to warm up her hands suddenly became so unbearable.

"Look at my me Usagi," he pleaded with her after he tilted his head forward to be able to catch her eyes. But she kept staring at the fountain, unable to look him in the eye.

"Don't shut me out like this Usagi, you know how I feel about you, so please, just talk to me, tell me what is on your mind," he squeezed her hand for an added encouragement.

Usagi contemplated her options. On one hand, she really wanted to tell someone, a friend, what she was going through. She wanted to share with someone the turmoil she felt inside and all the insecurities and confusion that were heavy on her shoulders. But on the other hand, this was Motoki, the guy that had confessed his feelings to her not too long ago; the guy that she also felt attracted to on some level; so how could she tell him, out of all people, what was going on with...him.

"I wish I could tell you Motoki-kun, I really do...but...there's nothing to tell and plus...you wouldn't understand," she said finally. Her tiny fingers still buried in Motoki's warm grasp, his thumb making invisible lines against her skin, sending jolts of tingling feeling down her spine.

"Try me," Motoki said, still concentrating on her face and the emotions that were being displayed in her baby blue eyes.

Usagi shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She wasn't used to getting this kind of physical attention from Motoki, well except for the time that she had accidently cut her index finger after throwing a fit at the Sailor V game and Motoki had gently disinfected her finger before wrapping a band aid over the tender flesh.

"Come on Usagi, I promise whatever it is, I won't judge you one bit. Please, let me help you," he pleaded with her again, sounding a little desperate. And that tone was what made Usagi to gather her wits and speak out her heart.

"Well...there is...there is this guy...," she said, and then watched Motoki from the corner of her eye before continuing, "and he's...I mean he's not a kind of guy... that I should think about, let alone hang out with, and..." her voice trailed off when Motoki's hold on her hand loosened and she heard his deep sigh. "What?" she asked him, confused and a little hurt; he had promised not to judge her, right?

"You're talking about that Chiba guy, aren't you?" he said while standing up and taking two small steps towards the fountain.

Usagi's eyes couldn't get any wider even if she tried her hardest. She looked up at him as if he was speaking in Lunarian language and she was a mute.

"How," came her small voice, "how did you know?"

He shrugged, "I'm not sure how...I just knew," he took a deep breath before turning around and staring down at her again, "actually that's a lie." He took a moment to gather his thoughts before continuing, "I've seen how he would stare at you every time they came in, and how you would react, I mean, it was quite obvious..." he was cut short with Usagi's loud shriek.

"WHAT?" she immediately blushed and looked around, embarrassed with her sudden outburst, "what do you mean 'it was obvious'? You mean, everyone knows?" she was mortified, and here she was thinking the only other person, besides herself and Mamoru-baka, was Yoshiro-baka who knew about them. This was bad...really, really bad.

"Whoa, relax Usa-chan, I don't think anybody else knows," Motoki gestured with his hands for her to calm down. Even though it might have been more fun to let her be worried for a bit longer. She always looked so damn adorable when she was stressed out, and he just had to smile to that.

"But you just said..."

"I meant, it was obvious to me," Motoki sighed and closed his eyes before sitting down again.

"Well..." Usagi said after what it seemed like enough time for her to process what he had stated, "now you know," she got up the bench and went back and forth on her feet while wrapping her arms around herself. The sun was slowly setting and once that bundle of light went away, so did the warmth.

Motoki watched her for a moment. He focused on her slender form standing in front of him, like an ancient Greek sculpture, all gold and white and pure softness. The streams of her long hair were lifted by the afternoon breeze and it was twirling around her petite figure, and...oh how he longed to feel their silkiness under his fingers. He stood up and went to her side, draping his coat over her, but not retrieving his hands from where they were resting on her slim shoulders. "Usagi," he breathed against her ear, feeling her shiver as he tightened his hold on her shoulders, just a little bit more.

Usagi closed her eyes and took a deep breath. His scent was different...not the spicy and bittersweet smell that she had come to know, but something else; he was all sweet and minty...and definitely warm.

"He's dangerous..." he said, while he moved his hands to hug her shoulders to his chest; Usagi's heart twisted with a feeling she couldn't really name. "I know," she breathed and unconsciously leaned her head against his shoulder, "I don't know what I was thinking," she said and felt him giving out a small chuckle. "You probably weren't", he said with a grin and placed his chin on top of her golden head.

They stood there for a while, in silence and serene. Usagi could feel his heart beat against her back, beating with peaceful rhythm and the whole setting made her heart swell with tranquility.

"I'm not going to see him anymore," she whispered, and she felt Motoki's arms tighten around her as he gave out an obvious sigh of relief.

"Okay... good," came his muffled voice against her hair, "and you'll come back to the arcade, yes?" he asked, still breathing in the cherry sweet scent of her hair, soft and silky against his face.

"I...I don't know," she whispered again, "I don't want to..."

"They don't come in anymore," he hurried into her unfinished sentence, wanting so much to drop any conversation about him and get back to their previous serenity.

"Oh..." it was all she could muster before she was spun around in his embrace and was looking straight into his forest green eyes.

"Listen to me," he said, taking hold of her face into his palms, urging her to look him in the eyes, "come to the arcade, let me spend some time with you," he pushed strands of curly blond hair away from her reddened face and stared intensely into her eyes, "what do you say?"

Usagi was lost at words, and even though she knew how he felt about her but she had never allowed herself to fantasize about the possibilities. He was a college student for crying out loud, and she was a silly high school girl...

She averted her eyes and focused on the first button of his shirt; she could see the soft skin of his collarbone and the glint of the silver chain around his neck.

After a few long moments of silence, she finally looked up and gave him a little smile.

He smiled back and leaned his forehead against hers.

This was only the beginning.

Or so he thought.

Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon and its fabulous characters in anyway. I wish I did. But I don't. All the delightful rights of this wonderful manga/anime and its characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi.