2 DAYS LATER, MONDAY 3:30pm*
Damon was waiting for me outside my community college, leaning against his baby blue Camaro with this legs crossed at the ankles and arms folded across his chest. He was parked in the same spot he always is with the same seductive smirk on his lips.
I threw my bag into the back seats and kissed him forcefully.
"Hey baby, I missed you today."
I smile against his lips. He says that same line everyday.
But something was different.
His hands slid around my waist and he pulled me closer to him. He broke the kiss and snuggled into my neck to whisper in my ear.
"We've got to go somewhere."
I lifted my head and looked up at him suspiciously.
"That doesn't sound good."
He eyed me and raised his eyebrows. It was at this point that I knew exactly what he was talking about and where we were going. The therapist.
I was quick to push away from him and I stumbled back. Panic and fear rose inside of me.
"No no no no no. No Damon please, not today. I just want to go home."
He reached out to hold my hands and rubbed the top of them both with the pads of his thumbs. He knew how to calm me down.
"Elena, I know how distressing this is going to be which is why Clara suggested that for the first few sessions I should be there with you. I've met her in person, and I've told her everything about you and she's really nice."
I gave him a puzzled look.
"Clara, huh? Sounds like a bitch. And how much is everything?"
I was sceptical about how much this 'Clara' knew and still wasn't sure if this was the right thing for me.
"But before you answer that, answer me this first, why didn't you tell me it was today?"
"I didn't know it was today, she only rang me two hours ago and you were in school. I didn't want to worry you."
"It's moments like these where a small text goes a long way."
He pulled me in for another hug and rested his chin on my head.
"So what does she know?"
"Well, just the self harm. Baby, I promise I will be with you every step of the way. We've gotta get going or we might be late."
"Oh we wouldn't want that would we."
He let out an exasperated sigh and I immediately regretted my unnecessary snide comment.
"Just give her a chance will you?"
"Fine. Let's go."
Damon let me go and got in the drivers seat while I sluggishly walked around the car and adamantly got into the passengers seat. Calvin Harris's 'Feel so Close' was on the radio and I immediately cranked up the volume without hesitation and sung along carelessly. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Damon frequently glance at me with adoration sparkling in his eyes and a soft grin on his lips. An occasional chuckle emerged from his throat followed by a gentle shake of his head.
"You seem happier now." He added a sly smirk to the sentence.
"How could I not? This is the greatest song ever. Ever."
A sexy chuckle escaped him and I couldn't help but blush. I sunk down in my seat, closed my eyes and soaked in the happiness that came with the tune.
I must've fallen asleep because the next thing I knew, Damon was gently shaking my shoulder.
"We're here baby."
"Mmm, home?"
To my disappointment, we just pulled up to the clinic that was in the next town over, 35 miles away in Atlanta.
"No sweets, Atlanta."
At this comment, I was jolted awake.
"Atlanta? What the hell are we doing in Atlanta?"
"Therapy. Elena I told you that the closest clinic she can get to is in Atlanta."
I knew deep down that Damon was trying his absolute best to give me the support that I need but sometimes I feel like he's just trying to piss me off more than anything. I mean really, Atlanta?
"How long are my sessions going to be?"
"The first couple sessions are going to be a few hours, at least 2 but no more than 4. But as Clara gets to know you more, the need for longer sessions will be unnecessary meaning that they will be at least half an hour on a good day but no more than an hour on a bad day. But you can have as long as you need. Her words not mine."
"Four hours? What could I possibly talk about for four hours straight?"
He turned in his seat to face me better but I turned my head away and crossed my arms.
"I'm not saying that every session will be four hours but the option is there. Look, she was expecting us at 4:00 and it's now ten past so we better get going."
Before he let me say anything he was already opening my side of the car. As he did, I could see in his eyes that I was emotionally draining him with my complaining. Having someone who cares for me as much as Damon does is a blessing just as much as a curse.
"Miss Gilbert, Clara Benson will now see you in room 4."
We had been waiting for no more than two minutes before the stern receptionist called out my name. She barely finished her sentence before I started shaking.
"Damon I can't do this. Look, just my damn name is scaring me."
He held my hands between his own in an effort to comfort me and planted soft kisses on my temple.
"Yes you can, and depending on how well this goes, I have a little surprise waiting for you at home."
His intention was clear as day. Sex. After my 'episode' on Saturday, all we ended up doing for the rest of the weekend was watching movies, talking and cuddling. It was perfect. He made me forget about the worst night of my life without even trying. Now all those memories came flooding back with what was suppose to be a comforting offer. I'm now more riled up than I was before.
All I could do was mumble in response.
"Oh. Um, sure. Okay."
"Elena, I'm going to be with you the whole time. Remember that."
Maybe that's what's scaring me so much; the thought of having Damon in the same room where I essentially admit my sins to someone I barely know. Where I tell 'Clara' about those agonising nights I spent crying and longing for my parents to come home to me. Where I tell her about Tyler.
"Come on darling, you're gonna be fine."
"No. I'm sorry Damon I can't do this. Not today."
I abruptly stood up and walked out the clinic. I could make out Damon calling after me and asking where I was going. Voices of reality and the past were merging together and I couldn't divide them. My vision blurred and I felt dizzy. Before I could make out what was happening to me, everything went black.
The same cold breeze hits the back of my legs followed by hands reaching around my waist.
"Tyler what're you doing in here? I'm trying to shower, get out."
"Elena I know you want this. I'm not going to stop until I get what I want."
I swear to god Tyler get the fuck out of here."
"Tyler stop it!"
"Elena stop moving."
"No stop it, Tyler it hurts stop."
"Elena don't tell me you don't want this. I can tell you're desperate for it you dirty slut"
Tears form in my eyes as I'm met with the reality of what is happening. He grabs my arm and drags me out the bathroom .
"Come on, I'm not finished yet"
I scream at him;
"TYLER LET GO OF ME NOW."
He shouts louder at me;
"SHUT THE FUCK UP AND STOP MOVING."
Both of us are still dripping wet. I'm pushed down on my back and Tyler eagerly climbs on top of me. He thrusts inside of me and I yell out in pain, tears drench my face. His short temper and angry outbursts reduce me to silence as I let him have his way with me. The only sounds Im able to make are quiet whimpers.
My eyes shoot open with a loud gasp.