Chapter Thirty-Three
Their Disagreement
It was the first true argument I had with Lucy. And it was over something that I had never wanted to discuss with anyone, especially not the person I loved.
But she just sat there, boiling slowly and when she got angry, she rose to her feet. When she got very angry, her power swirled around the room like a growing tornado, not enough to affect the surroundings but enough for my natural defences to raise.
"You're a hypocrite." She whispered, folding her arms over herself, tears swimming in her eyes. Every part of me wanted to soothe her. My dragon didn't understand it was a fight, an argument. I never wanted to cause that look of pain and turmoil in her lovely eyes, but for this, I couldn't back down.
Not when her safety was at stake.
"And you are being tricked into believing he isn't the worst creature on this earth."
A laugh hissed through her teeth, a frustrated sound, "He is you, Natsu. And I'm sorry if it makes me biased, but I couldn't imagine any part of you is the 'worst creature on this earth.'"
Her words didn't mean to hurt me, but they did. It made my own sort of anger rise, making the temperature of the room steadily climb, irritation tearing at my insides. I tried to control the darkness coiling around inside me, and lower my voice at the same time; I didn't want anyone to overhear our conversation.
"You really think I'm a psychopathic, blood-hungry demon?"
"I think it's a part of you, yes." She snapped back, her movements rigid, angry as she paced the carpet in front of me, "Everyone has the ability to destroy and create pain. So, everyone has that part of them."
"You have no idea what you are talking about," I snarled lowly, "You have two conversations with him, and suddenly you are the expert?"
Another frustrated noise left her mouth and she rubbed at her eyes, then her face, her hands shaking as she replied, "I only told you what happened. I never said I was an expert on anything."
Her words didn't soothe the hurt, wild feeling my chest and I resisted the urge to rub at it, standing completely still, watching her.
From what she had told me, I had lost control. And that was my fault, and problem, not hers. I would have let it go, handled it by myself, created more barriers, purged the darkness to the deepest part of me, if she hadn't uttered those stupid, brain-tingling words.
"He wasn't that bad."
"You feel pity for him. You… You don't see him as a monster."
"How can I?" She stated, her tone full of pain, turning to face me now, her cheeks red, her eyes redder with unshed tears, "He is you Natsu! To see him as a monster, I would have to think of you as one too."
"Everyone else separates that part of me. They know how it works."
"You mean denial?" She snapped, clenching her fists, "Act like he's not inside you right now? Act like he's some magical being that possesses you and he only wears your skin, and speaks your voice and has your soul?"
"He is a soulless demon!" The words came out in a yell, "Do not say he has any part of me!""
"Don't you dare shout at me." Her voice was calm, a storm of destruction brewing around us, making her eyes flicker from the galaxy to the brown I fell in love with. She stalked over to me, placed her hands flat on my chest and shoved.
I let it take me back an inch, grinding my teeth, as she shoved again, "I will not play these games. I will not force myself to use denial as a way of coping with that part of you. Because I fell in love with you, I will accept and cherish every single part of you. And there is nothing, absolutely squat, you can do about it!"
The room shook, and I grasped her wrists, her words touching the insulted part of me, but the anger swamped it down, making everything red, making that darkness peer over the wall, watching her. It was the strangest, most terrifying experience I had ever felt. It wasn't attacking my control, urging me to let it out.
It was just watching, loitering.
Watching her.
"That part of me doesn't deserve your love, don't you get that? I won't have you love… it along with the rest of me."
She pulled her wrists from my grasp, shaking me off before walking over to the shoes Erza had given her this morning, when I had woken up to her stroking my face, wearing a sad smile, an anxious, salty smell clinging to her scent.
I watched as she shoved her feet in, not even bothering to do the laces, speaking over her shoulder, "You're a hypocrite."
It was the second time she had said it, and I didn't understand why.
When I didn't respond, too lost in my own thoughts of self-hatred and condemnation, she turned to me, tears sparkling in her eyes, a glare set on her beautiful features.
"You ask me to accept my darkness, that has the ability to kill, and demolish, and hurt but you won't even try to understand yours."
I shook my head, disagreeing, telling through clenched teeth, "It's not the same."
Her laugh was a mocking, sad noise, as if I was so far down in my own denial, I wasn't listening to her words. It made irritation with myself, and her, pick at my head.
"Really? Because when the Scream of Ira overcame me, there was a split second where I wanted to destroy everyone in the room, to watch it burn, to feed from the power and be free," She turned around, hand on the doorknob, before uttering softly, "And the thought of loving you did not even cross my mind."
I closed my eyes tightly, her words making my whole body taut, tense, before hearing the door creak open.
"By the way," She threw over her shoulder just before she left, "If you really feel the need to lock him away, you might have to decide between him and me. Because every time you are around me, he can see clearer, and that means your shields aren't as strong."
Then she left, the door thudded shut behind her, the automatic lock clicking into place. I listened to her fastened footsteps for a few long minutes, before turning around, my fists clenched tight, my temper on a very thin line. The beasts inside me reacted, clawing, hissing at each other, rivals until the end as I headed towards the bathroom, turning the taps on so I could cool down, literally.
Her words swirled around in my head, proving just how much that stubborn princess of mine got to me and dimly, I realised that not only did my dragon like that she was mine, but the darker, restless part of me also liked it.
It made me grit my teeth together, shedding off my sleeping clothes, climbing underneath the burning icy water, feeling steam rise from my skin when the torrents made impact. The magic timer clicked down, alerting me I had only ten minutes of this before it had to be reset, unless I wanted to draw my own bath.
A bath with Lucy might be the only time I would huddle in an oval shaped hole.
I placed my hand on the stone wall, hanging my head, letting the water slap and shard into my back, the stream bruising but calming, cleansing the filth I felt crawling over my body. Everything I did, I did to protect her. Even before she came into my life, I somehow knew I was getting ready to meet her. A week before she stumbled onto my lands, I had an argument with Dad about my demonic powers and how holding them back could create more tension inside of me.
Then only a fleeting time later, I was using one of those demonic gifts to connect with her, to aid her in speaking when her voice had gone.
Why was I letting her words get to me like this?
A small part of me told me I had overreacted, and that it was within her right to feel however she wanted but a bigger, more stubborn and demanding part said no.
No, it wasn't right that she cared for a part of me that I hated.
No, she wasn't allowed to feel pity for it because that made her weak and the demon inside of me preyed on weakness.
No, I couldn't allow her to feel anything but hatred, so I could protect her from myself.
Darkness flashed over my eyes, and I hunkered down, feeling the wave of vertigo rock me as the memories from last night, their talk came swimming to the surface.
"Careful little Banshee, if you Scream, you might bring the whole castle down."
My eyebrows furrowed when he walked over to the door, locking it from the inside, not even bothering to escape, to take my body and my face and lay waste to my Kingdom in sick retribution and twisted fun.
I could see what he saw last night, a beautiful woman, staring up at him in shock, and unease but no fear, no disgust. Lucy looked beautiful against the dark sheets of my bed, all creamy skin and lush curves. Even the birds nest that she called her hair was calling him to fist his hands through it, to tangle it up more, slid his fangs down her skin, like I had.
"Well… that's alarming. I'm guessing you find me more interesting than pillaging a nearby town?"
Her tone was breathless, surprised and rightfully confused, as she lifted herself up, watching carefully. Observing him, in that way that made me feel oddly like a specimen she wanted to study. But it made the demon felt only pride, fueled by the need to impress her, to shock her, to gain a reaction.
I fell deeper into the memory, watching their encounter as seconds ticked by. Something burned inside me, something hot, and fuelled by darkness, when he, I – no fuck he, stated, the amused darkness swirling in his tone.
"So, you'd invite me into your bed, to have this… chat?"
When she agreed, I wanted to throttle her for allowing it, for being so… naive. I was waiting, baited breath, for when he would attack her, hurt her. The demon inside me couldn't be trusted, he was darkness, evil… terrifying.
Fear climbed up my throat when he pinned her to the bed, frustration sunk into my bones when she made a breathless joke. They spoke, him holding her to the bed, and her relaxed body allowing it, too trusting, too pure, staring up at him in curiosity.
The conversation died and Lucy's eyes widened, her back arching as I felt the remnants of whatever power he had just pushed through her, swarm my senses. The darkness reacted inside me, but I pushed it down, down so I could focus on what affect it had on Lucy. Her beautiful blonde hair bled back, tattoo's rising from her core, decorating her skin with that stunning glowing gold, her eyes switching to a galaxy full of wonder and stars.
The fear in my throat slid away, replaced with shock as the tell-tale blush spread over her cheeks, and her words came out breathless, but soft.
Was she…?
"It was you… Natsu had asked me what it felt like when he connected with my lioness in Jellal's cabin. And I could feel fur, but somehow silk as well… I just assumed it was because my lion was rolling around inside of me but…"
When that part of me agreed and told her that he had been curious about what had caused my control to shake, what she said as she was leaving suddenly clicked inside my brain.
He had been lurking this whole time.
And I hadn't even been aware.
She asked all the questions I would have been too angry to ask. The important questions about why he didn't fight me, when he could have. I would have kept him back, I had practically mastered that by this point, but why, why, why was still spiralling around me.
And he spoke.
The demon, who rarely said anything without a riddle or a crude dark reminder of what he was, accepted and responded to her questions just like I would. Like I always had. It never occurred to me that I would have anything in common with the darkness inside of me, but watching it speak, watching it view her as this ball of power, light and beauty, made me shake with something completely different.
"I have answered your questions, Malo. Now it is time for you to repay the courtesy."
Her eyes went guarded, and I pushed the odd – though fitting – nickname from my mind, feeling prideful at how she immediately caught onto his words, and looking at him suspiciously.
When she agreed to his terms, for the demon to take the darkness that I finally noticed swirling around her, I watched for a few more seconds when the demon, the darkness, lowered its mouth to her neck, sharp teeth glinting before sucking on the skin just below her jaw.
I pushed out, gasping, coming back to the surface of my mind, and tried to soothe the burning in my gut. At first I thought it might be jealously, which both didn't make any sense, and was confusing as it was conflicting, when a more startling truth slapped me in the face.
I ran my hand down, down, until I groaned, my hand seeking my hard, flushed cock.
"What the fuck, is wrong with me." I hissed, ripping my hand away before the shower stopped, the water ceasing in a split second, leaving me drenched, angry and frustrated.
And hard.
I got dressed slowly, still replaying the memories of last night through my head, trying to figure out what I could say to Lucy. I had acted rashly, I knew this much. I should have been more patient, should have waited to see the facts for myself. I doubted I would ever accept that part of me, but the discussion could not be pushed aside for later.
I had to talk to Lucy about it, about it all.
When I was pulling on a shirt, a knock on the door made me look up and I briefly hoped it was Lucy, just so I could so some grovelling in my own territory. The smell that emanated from behind the closed door told me it was not, and I walked over, pulling it open with a sharp look, my temper still touchy after being left with a hard issue that was ignored.
Jackal bowed submissively, and I grinded out, "Lucy isn't here." And even if she was, there was no way I was letting her talk to you when she isn't talking to me.
"I know, Prince Dragneel. I came to fetch you personally."
"What for?"
He faltered before lowering his voice, "Princess Lucy has run into my Lord Zeref. Her temper feels fragile, and I believe it made turn volatile." I brought my hand up to my eyes, the added anger of Zeref still lurking about making my skin heat, and my beasts growl, reacting in similar ways towards a common enemy.
Glad to see it wasn't only Lucy they could agree on.
"He can't touch Lucy, they have a pact." I growled out, pinching the skin between my eyes as Jack uttered back very softly.
"The agreement is null if one of the parties die."
Fuck.
I followed him through the hallways, not entirely sure my presence would de escalate a touchy situation – since Lucy had left me this morning out of anger – but I needed to be there, to help her. To silently, or loudly, assist her in whatever she needed. Even if we were fighting, I had to be there for her, if anything to cheer her on when she kicked Zeref's ass.
"Get out of my way, Zeref. I have no interest in continuing this conversation with you." Her words shook the walls slightly, the strength of her power making my steps increase. It showed how much of her temper was peeled back, ready to snap. Worry and a dark need to protect her pushed me faster towards them.
"But you are interested in revenge, are you not?"
"Deal with your own issues of destructive self-hate later. I'm not killing you, yet."
"It is both amusing and worrying that you truly believe you could." I was close, just around the corner when her voice, tight with fear, her power suddenly disappearing from the atmosphere, made me stop.
"Let go of me."
My heart let out a slow, heady pulse, as the smell of her terror and distress swirled around me. A growl ripped up my throat when my steps launched me around the corner, only a second of seeing her falling to her knees, petrified, lost in the sensation that a touch from Zeref could conjure.
And some part of me, some smarter, less volatile part knew that she'd be fine. Zeref could scare a person to death, but not with one fleeting touch.
I was behind him in a second, my hands going to the back of his neck and jaw. No thoughts, only the urge to protect what's mine fuelled me. Snap. His body crumbled to the floor at my feet with a loud thud and I reached out, gasping Lucy by the waist before she fell entirely, pulling her against my body protectively.
She shook in my grip, blinking repeatedly as I looked down my cousins' lifeless body, a hostile snarl building in the back of my throat. Jackal crouched down, touching his wrist, before Igneel, King Sparky and Acnologia – probably the worst three people to find us – passed by, stopping when they saw the scene.
"I can't see." Lucy whispered, "What happened?"
I closed my eyes tightly, gulping down my anger, my words barely making it out, "His power is still inside you. It'll fade."
She nodded, her eyes closed, as she buried her head in my neck, breathing deeply, her shaking slowly lessening. My anger didn't as Jackal stood back up, looking away from his master's body.
"He's already reviving himself."
Rage suffocated me and I clenched my jaw, "Will he still revive if I take off his head?"
"Yes." Jackal replied, his voice blank, but his eyes worried as he glanced at me, then Lucy, then the Royals. I sighed sharply, placing my hand on the top of Lucy's head, tucking her closer so she could breathe more of my smell in. I hoped it would soothe her, just as her closeness was slowly, quietly beginning to soothe me.
"Take him to the room designated to you both," I stated, "When he awakes, tell him he has twenty-four hours to get off Molten property. Or I will be forced to make sure he goes back to the Vapids in pieces."
"Yes, Prince Dragneel." Jackal bowed once, before reaching down, lifting his master up in a smooth, efficient movement. His eyes glanced at Lucy once, before forcibly removing them, and I sighed again, my shoulders relaxing only slightly.
"You can see her before you go."
Jackal blinked, surprised, before a very brief look of relief sparked in his eyes. He nodded once, then threw Zeref over his shoulder, before stating softly, "Malo means little."
Lucy's head lifted slightly and I fought the tense, remembering her conversation with the demon, and wondered how Jackal knew about the nickname he had given her. Lucy whispered a very soft thank-you, then huddled back into me, tucking her head back against my skin. I let a hand wander down her back soothingly, remembering the countless times Zeref had inspired pure terror and fear inside me.
It was a violating, disgusting power that everyone was virtually impossible to stop.
Dad chose to speak now, after they all had remained silent for so long, "I don't know what to ask first."
"There's nothing to ask. There was situation, and I dealt with it."
Dad raised his eyebrow, clearly doubtful before Acnologia spoke up, carefully watching Lucy, "The darkness around her has grown. It would be beneficial to relieve it before she meets with Aquarius."
"Don't talk as if I'm not here," Lucy huffed, her head still buried in my neck, her tone petulant and I smiled slightly, closing my eyes to try and use her presence to ground my anger, to tuck it away.
"You seem pretty hell-bent on disappearing into your dragon there." Acnologia mused softly, "Aquarius is in her room resting, she would not mind if you take a few minutes to ground yourself."
"I'm fine." Lucy muttered, but her voice was tired, muffled and I rubbed her back softly, drawing her in tighter against me.
"We need to talk anyway Lucy."
"She's not the only person you will need to talk to. You just assaulted and killed another Royal. Though the situation may have called for it, it's enough to start a war." Dad stated, his tone disapproving and I understood where he was coming from. It was a rash action, with no thought about how it would affect my Kingdom touching my mind.
But it was Lucy.
"It's Molten law that a visiting royal cannot threaten, assault or attack a royal member of this state."
"Yes, but unfortunately, Lucy is not a royal member of this state. She is also a visiting royal, of sorts."
I stared at Dad closely, before voicing the thoughts I had been experiencing for the last few weeks, thoughts I had banished when Lucy died.
"She will be when I offer my hand and this Kingdom in matrimony."
Lucy gasped, pulling back to look at me with wide, shocked eyes, "Matrimony?"
"I've mentioned marriage before," I struggled not to flinch at her look of incredulity, feeling an odd sense of anxiety and vulnerability trifle through me. Her eyes glossed over, moisture misting them and I leaned forward, pressing my head against hers. I growled softly, watching as she shuddered and her hands gently touched my chest.
"You mentioned it in a joking manner, I didn't believe you were entirely serious."
I smiled ruefully, opening my mouth to rebuff her claim and tell her that almost all the things I said to her were from the heart and as serious as I could make them when Dad intervened.
"While I am happy and more than welcoming to the idea of Lucy becoming your Queen, Natsu… This decision should not be made on a whim or the need to protect her. Dragons do not divorce, that is also Molten law."
I sighed, closing my eyes to push back the slight annoyance at him, knowing he was just being careful, looking out for me as he always did.
"My decision-making skills might be a bit… brazen at times but I know my own heart, and I know what it wants. And there is no doubt within me that I want Lucy, to be my wife and my Queen."
Lucy let out a sob, "You… idiot, you can't fix a fight by proposing to me. That's cheating." I smiled gently down at her, as she wrapped her arms around herself, lightly touching her cheek.
"It's not truly a proposal yet, I still have to tie you to a tree and leave you to fend for yourself for three whole days." Her sobs mixed with laughter and she extended one warm to shove at me, desperately trying to control herself in front of company.
"There's also the climbing into a live Volcano to show you are one with his element." Acnologia added, his tone amused and fond. I wondered if Lucy knew how he watched her, a sort of affection that only family members could give. Since she had her own problems with family, I wished she noticed that he cared for her, in his own way.
I also wondered if she noticed how many glares we had exchanged over the fleeting time we knew each other.
Lucy spun away, her shoulders shaking and King Sparky, surprisingly, inputted another ritual Dragons had when it came to betrothal.
"Don't forget the brutal fighting tournaments when you have to beat down any other dragoness that wants the young Princes hand."
Lucy shook her head, turning around, wiping at her tired eyes with a grin, "I think I've got that part covered."
My shoulders relaxed entirely at her playful words and I reached for her hand, joy bursting through me when she immediately laced our fingers together. I began to tug her back down the way I had come with Jackal, informing Acnologia, my eyes never leaving hers.
"Inform her mermaid that we will be down to talk to her soon."
My eyes drifted over to Dad, who was watching quietly, his eyes blank and guarded.
"We'll talk."
He nodded once, before glancing at Lucy, his eyes softening, "I suppose it is too early to say, 'welcome to the family'."
"It's never too early," Lucy promised, "But before any sort of proposal takes place, I have a lot to do."
That was the understatement of the century. In these brief moments of happiness, and safety, I could only remember the growing threat that lay behind these walls for her. An older, probably stronger Banshee, who caused her first death, had been hunting her this whole time. Along with a cruel Father who may or may not want her dead for the crime she committed.
It seemed like the easiest thing she was handling right now was her volatile power.
I know, I know, this chapter is short compared to the previous ones. I struggled with this one a bit because I'm still not 100% and trying to make sense of how Natsu views himself and in extension his demon, took a lot out of me. Since there was so much in this chapter already, so much content that is – important content, if you make note of the little hints here and there – I've decided to split the chapter in half.
So next chapter will be their 'discussion' about Lucy and her feelings towards his demon half and then the talk with Aquarius as well as a very intense scene towards the end.
A little side note, in this chapter, 'Malo' which is Bosnian (in case you haven't noticed, all demon in this book is a mix of Bosnian/Romanian so if you really want to know the translations to the few things Natsu has said two words: google translate) stands for 'little'. However, in the next chapter, you will figure out what extended meaning it has in the demon language I have created/improvised around the story. So don't fret, the 'odd' truth behind the nickname will soon be revealed!
#ThenicestZerefistheonewithabrokenneck
Question Time!
What are some of your favorite long (like 20) nalu fanfics? Can u recommend some to us? I have a lot that I would recommend, gosh, that it might take up the whole chapter. You can find all the fics I read/enjoy in my faves section on my profile but off the top of my head, Golem is a very good Nalu read, Uncharted Territory is an oldie but a goodie, THAT STRIPPER ONE OMG I think it's 'Talk Dirty' ? but it's not finished and I'm not sure if the name is right. And WHIPS (What Hides In Plain Sight). I guess it just depends on what sort of Nalu you are looking for!
Will Lucy have a strong relationship with End soon too? Like maybe a lemon scene? I'm toying with a lemon scene atm. I'm not sure how I could work it, or if it would fit since Natsu really don't like his demon that much. Ask in a few more chapters? And I'll see where my head is at then.
BrokenAngelWings Ayyyy, I miss you too! Don't be a stanger chicken ;)
Acnologia wanted approx. be lucy's 30 great grandfather it means there should be great 30 times in front of grandfather when we talk about Acnologia og lucy's relation. Thank you for doing the math I was too lazy too. But from now on, I will be referring Acnologia as Uncle Anco just because.
Will we continue to see more for END? Yeees ~
Will Lucy be switching between the spirit animals or does she stick with lion even after coming back? She sticks w Lion since that was her OG animal form. (plus Lucy couldn't be anything but a lion in my eyes).
Are all supernaturals beholden to the Edge or is that just some? Excellent question! The only supernaturals not beholden to the edge are animal based, they are born with animal right off the bat e.g dragons, wolves, lions etc etc
Lucy said the silky feeling she felt was "something she hasn't felt in years" and I was kinda confused. From the point that she met Natsu to now, how much time has passed? She 'felt' like; as in it's not that she hasn't felt it in years literally, but more that it's been so long SINCE she felt it. A little dramatics for you from the Fresh. It's been approx just under two months since they met now, APPROX.
Is the silk just another touchy-feely kink added to their relationship? Yes and no? I mean, all supernatural creatures have a different 'feel' of magic. Lucy, has wind or fur (depending on what form her power is in). Natsu's dragon power is warmth to Lucy, but Natsu's demon side is darker, and cooler, so silk is what she feels (did this make any sense)
Does END really just feed off of the darkness? And what did he mean by the warmth in her belly was dragon? Was that caused by Natsu's dragon or...the super diluted dragon blood in her? He feeds off the darkness, he lives for it and the pain that comes with it. The warmth in her belly is a repeated feeling Lucy gets when she's around Natsu, so it's Natsu's actual presence (and dragon by extension) that creates that. it might be easier for her to feel it because of the distant relation to dragons but it is definitely Natsu's power that creates that yummy-ness.
Will we ever see a fight between Jude and Lucy? Will Loke ever return? Yes & maybe. Loke is a side character that might have a brief appearance but right now, from here on out, it's going to be a lot of Team Goth Lucy versus Evil Old Banshee.
What is your Tumblr? fresh-princess-is-here . tumblr . com
Is ffn broken or did you really post this at 6am in the morning? I woke up coughing a lung at five thirty, noticed my editor had finished it and was like 'well, may as well upload before I die from asphyxiation.'
So does that mean that when Natsu and Lucy bonded, Lucy bonded with both sides of Natsu so that even Natsu's demon half has some kind of inexplicable loyalty to Lucy? Inexplicable loyalty is pushing it but it's safe to say, Demon!Natsu has a connection with her.
I hope you enjoyed and please be lovely, and kind to yourself.
You're all awesome.
Not as awesome as me but, hey ?
Stay fresh dears
xo freshprincess