Let me know what you think? .com
Lena spent her days in the lab, and the nights patrolling the city, and meeting Kara on the roof of L-corp.
They talked about their day, vented to each other, then Lena was pulled away by a crime, and when she came back Kara was always gone.
It was a little under a week after Kara showed up at her place that Lena just wasn't good enough.
She tried, she tried so hard, but the building was too big, and the fire spread too fast, and Lena just couldn't get to everyone.
The death count was five, a middle age couple, a teenager, an older man and a baby.
Lena felt numb as she swung home, stumbling on her feet when she entered her apartment through her balcony doors, not even bothering to change before she curled up on the sofa and just cried.
She could still hear the screams, the sound of that mother bawling. She could smell the burning of flesh and hair. She could see the third degree burns some of the people had suffered, the melting skin and the broken bones.
It was all too much, it was her breaking point.
She cried herself to sleep that night and when she woke up the following day with a blanket over her and Sam sitting her feet, scribbling down notes in her book.
"Sam?" Lena frowned, her voice gruff.
Sam looked up from her book, her hand sliding up Lena's leg to her thigh. "Hey, Lee."
"How long have you been here?"
"I heard about what happened when I woke up this morning so I stopped by." Sam explained. "I'm so sorry, Lena."
Lena shook her head, swallowing the lump in her throat as she sat up, running her hands over her face. "I wasn't good enough, Sam." She croaked, tears rushing to her eyes when it all started coming back to her.
"So many more could have died last night if not for you, Lena, you have to understand that. You can't save everyone but the amount of good you do, it is incredible. People are alive right now because of you."
"There was a baby, Sam." Lena sobbed. "A teenager, an old man, a couple."
"You have to think of the people you saved, you can't think of those you didn't."
"It's all I can think about. Those people dying, the cross-species, Black Cat, the mafia families, gang wars, the rising crime. It is all I can think about." Lena snapped, getting to her feet and began pacing. "I can't deal with it all on my own, I'm not good enough."
"You are plenty good enough," Sam disagreed.
"I can't- its getting too much, Sam." Lena ran her hand through her hair. "I'm exhausted, I can't keep doing this."
"So don't, Lena." Sam whispered, moving to stand in front of Lena, taking ahold of her hand. "You have taken too much on with this, you are trying to save an entire city but that's not something you can do alone."
"Can I ask you something? And I need you to be honest with me."
"Okay," Sam promised.
"When we broke up, was it because of my powers?"
"Partially," Sam answered honestly. "But you were there, Lena, you know we weren't working."
Lena nodded minutely.
"What brought this on?"
"The Black Cat, she said some things that I think might be true." Lena whispered.
"What did she say?"
"People like she and I don't get happy endings, we don't get the girl, we don't get love." Lena said, quickly speaking up again when Sam opened her mouth to argue. "And it makes sense; if I don't tell them then there is this huge secret and me sneaking out without any explanation, and if they do know then their life is just constant worry."
"That's not how it works, and I'm sorry if us breaking up has left you with some sort of complex, but your powers were a minute part of why we broke up. And Veronica, she is incapable of love, that had nothing to do with you. And Leslie, Lena, Leslie was not on you." Sam brushed the hair out of her best friends face, running her thumb over her cheekbone. "And Kara will love you, this you. The real you. Not the spider, not National City's hero, but you. Lena Luthor, the pretty girl with an incredible mind who is going to shape a generation with her ideas." Sam grinned at Lena. "Not to mention your are fantastic in bed."
Lena tsked, pushing Sam away. "Fuck off," she murmured around a laugh, turning to get herself some coffee.
"I'm serious, Lee." Sam said, her voice serious again.
"Black Cat and I kissed last night," Lena said, hitting the button on her coffee machine.
"What is it with you and that woman?" Sam sighed, perching herself on Lena's kitchen counter.
"There is something oddly comforting about her," Lena admitted, leaning against the counter beside Sam's thighs. "I know where I stand with her, there no bullshit or dancing around each other, we fuck, that's it. But I couldn't last night,"
"Because of Kara?"
Lena crosses her arm across her chest, chewing on the thumb of her other hand. "Yeah," she hummed. "She's getting closer to the spider, we've spent almost every night for the past week on top of L-corp just talking."
"Are you going to tell her who you really are?"
"I think eventually, maybe." Lena shrugged. "I don't know, I'm scared."
Sam hummed. "She's a nice girl, Lena, I'm sure she will understand."
"Maybe," Lena said. "How are things with you and Alex?"
"It was actually her place I came from this morning."
"Oh, really," Lena grinned, pouring them both coffee.
"Yeah, we went out for dinner then went back to her place."
There was a coyness in the was Sam was talking that told Lena exactly what they got up to when they went back to Alex's place. "Was she good?" Lena asked, peering at same over the rim of her mug.
"It was good."
Lena rolled her eyes. "Just because I'm having a crisis in that part of my life doesn't mean I won't be happy for you, Sam."
A smile broke out on her face them. "It was amazing, Lena. We have just... clicked. There's something special about her."
"I'm really happy for you,"
They finished their coffee before heading into the lab to finish up the prototype suit.
It was almost ten when they finally finished.
"What if we have the same problem as the other suit?" Lena said unsurely, eyeing the little box in Sam's hand.
"Only one way to find out," Sam shrugged, thrusting the box against Lena's chest.
Lena panicked at the quiet hiss, squeezing her eyes shut, when the brackets shot out and over her shoulder, bracing to be thrown backwards by the explosion.
But it never came, instead there was this odd, almost liquid feeling covering her skin, and when she cracked an eye open and looked down, the nanites was extending to cover her skin, almost like a second skin.
She held her hands up just as they were being covered, the main colour black but the accents were a green colour, the circle in the middle of her palm glowing green.
Then her face was being covered, the mask mirroring her old one, just more metallic looking.
The eyes lit up just enough for Lena to see the display, but not hinder her vision.
"Right now I have just programmed in your vitals, but I'm working on a way for it to scan the environment." Sam explained. "This button here," she pointed to Lena's arms. "Releases the spider drones, you have four, they will nestle back in when you are finished with them. You also have access to multiple webbing, like before, but now you have access to four different types of webbing."
Lena asked. "I could never get them to switch reliably."
"Winn had a look, he modified to plans slightly." Sam explained, holding up the shooter. "Right now it have ice, impact, and electric."
"I've been working on acid for the cross species."
"Good call," Sam agreed, placing the shooter into its holder. "Now, this is cool," she said, motioning to Lena's fingertips. "Depending on the type of webbing the colour on your fingertips will change, just to keep you right. Ordinary is white, ice blue, electricity yellow. The others need programmed but you can do that."
Lena switched webbing using the button beside the shooters, smiling when the lights on her fingertips faded from white to an icy blue colour.
"This is incredible," Lena whispered. "Thank you, Sam. I would never have time to do all this without you."
"What are friends for," Sam shrugged. "Once we figure out how to get the neural interfaces to run faster then all of this will happen with a simple thought, but right now we need to use button."
"It's not the same the Ottos neural interface, right?"
"Of course not," Sam rolled her eyes. "It will be electrode in the mask. There will also be electrodes running down the spine to allow you to drop the mask whenever you want. No more carriing your suit or wearing it under your clothes."
"Thank god,"
"Oh, and do this for me," Sam swung her arm up in front of her, like she was holding a shield.
Lena frowned, but mimicked her, jumping when a circular, almost holographic like shield appeared, the spider design shifting and glitching as Lena moved her arm. "Holy shit,"
"Right?" Sam grinned. "It is bullet proof, but only for a few shots, then it will collapse and need to recharge."
"You really went all out with this."
"Well, yeah. I know you've been stressed, I've seen this mantle chip away at you over the years, I thought I would give you some peace of mind that you a marginally more protected."
Lena smiled, about to reply when the police radio in the corner crackled and coordinations to a robbery were spoken.
"Why don't you give your new suit a trail run?"
"Thank you for this, Sam," Lena said, squeezing Sam's arm before rushing out of the lab.
—
The first time Lena seen the Green Goblin she wasn't even suited up.
She was out with Kara, both of them were in National City park eating lunch.
"How old were you when you became vegan?" Kara asked, taking a bite of the vegan pasta Lena had made them both.
"I have always been vegetarian, but I couldn't afford to be vegan until after university." Lena explained. "The Luthor's put me through university, so I was lucky, but I had to work for money to live on, and being vegan is expensive."
"It must be a nightmare, since we met I've found myself looking to see if there was anything vegan on menus and for the most part there isn't."
Lena felt oddly touched at that statement. "I had trouble before but I found a few places that have great vegan food. Plus I actually enjoy cooking, when I have time."
"And you are good at it, too." Kara complimented, pointing her fork down to her food.
"Thank you," Lena smiled, leaning back on her palm, leaning a little closer to Kara. "Maybe you could come over one night and I could cook us dinner?"
Kara looked at her with wide eyes, her cheeks puffed out and stuffed with pasta, and Lena felt herself fall in love a little more. Kara quickly chewed, but when she did answer Lena wasn't listening, because the hairs covering her arms and the back of her neck were suddenly standing to attention, the left side of her head tingling, toward the back, but before she could even turn in that direction an explosion sounded through the park.
Lena was on her feet in a flash, standing between Kara and the danger.
"What was that?" Kara scrambled to her feet.
"That building," Lena whispered, trying to figure out a way of getting away from Kara without causing suspicion.
Then something came flying out of the smoking window, perched on a glider and Lena's stomach dropped. She didn't know this one, she preferred enemies she had come across before.
It flew over the top of them, and everyone watched it go.
Its glider was green, and its suit green and purple, and Lena could do nothing but watch it go.
"Call your sister, I need to go make sure the people in that building are okay."
"Are you crazy?" Kara's frowned, grabbing Lena's arm when she tried to go. "You don't know how safe it is."
"I won't go in if it isn't safe." Lena swore. "Now, call Alex."
Kara started to argue but Lena took off before she could, running toward the building and pushing through the crowds surrounding the building and into ally, thwipping up to the first level of the fire escape before grabbing her suit and pressing the box against her chest.
Lena entered the window that had billows of smoke coming from it first, taking in the crumbled walls and the hole in the ceiling and floor.
"Lena," Sam's voice sounded through her coms. "Explosion by the park."
"I'm here," Lena jumped down the hole, there were two dead, presumably from the apartment above, and one alive. "Ma'am, come with me, we have to get out of here."
The woman took Lena's outstretched hand, and Lena took her outside, setting her on her feet before dealing with the rest of the residents around the explosion before going back to the two dead.
Lena recognised the man immediately after she turned him over, even in his charred, burnt state.
"Sam, it's Osborne." Lena whispered, turning the woman beside him over. "And his wife."
"Osborne?" Sam asked. "Shit."
"It wasn't an accident, something came flying out of the window after the explosion, it was on a glider."
"A glider?"
"Mm," Lena hummed, heaving the two on to her shoulder.
"I'm going to drop them off with the fire fighters," Lena explained, jumping out of the window and landing softly on her feet, in front of the fire truck, dropping the bodies before thwipping herself back into the building. "I need to get back to Kara, but I will see you later tonight."
Lena scrambled out of the window onto the fire escape, lifting the square from her chest slightly, causing the suit to collapse into the three inch by three inch cube, before pocketing it and jumping down from the fire escape.
She had an armful of Kara before she had even breached the crowed, Kara wrapping her arms tightly around Lena's neck.
"I'm so glad you're okay," she whispered against Lena's neck.
"I didn't get in, all the windows on the fire escape were locked." Lena assured.
"The Spider was saving people, but she didn't come out with you and I got worried." Kara explained, pulling back but only slightly, Lena's arms still tightly wrapped around her midsection. "What were you thinking? Trying to go in there?"
"I couldn't let people die without at least trying," Lena said, and Kara's eyes softened, her lips hooking up into a smile and she just stared at Lena.
Lena honestly thought Kara was about to kiss her, but then they were being ushered away by a police officer, then Sam appeared, followed not long after by Alex.
Lena could feel the anxiety bubbling in her chest, because this was something else to add onto her endless list of problems she has right now.
They were heading home when Kara lightly grabbed her hand, prompting Lena to turn back to her.
"You spaces for a bit back there, I'm not sure if you heard me," Kara started taking a step closer to Lena. "But I would love to do dinner sometime."
"Oh," the fact Lena had even brought it up had completely slipped her mind. "That's great. I will text you a date and time?"
"Okay," Kara agreed, an almost shy smile on her lips. "I will text you later."
Osborne, it turns out, had been experimenting with cross species, using Conor's old work and building upon it.
He was the source of the cross species, potentially the source of the thing that killed him, and on top of that she found out from Sam that there had been a peace agreement between the mafia families in National City and the ones in Central City.
She was exhausted, her anxiety perpetually elevated, and she could feel her sanity slip, to the point she almost called Felicia.
Instead she perched herself on the top of CatCo. staring out at the National City skyline, which was surprisingly calming.
Lena heard Kara before she even spoke, the hairs on the back of her neck standing in end like they always seemed to around Kara. "Since when did you hang out on top of CatCo.?"
"It is the tallest building in the city," Lena answered, looking over her shoulder at Kara. "Why are you up here?"
"It's the tallest building in the city," Kara answered, leaning her forearms against the wall. "Quiet night?"
"Mm,"
"What happened to your new suit?" Kara asked.
"It's being worked on,"
"Lena?" Lena's heart spiked at the sound of her name, and she squeezed out 'what?' before she could stop herself. "Is it Lena who is working on it?"
"Oh, right. Yeah, she is upgrading the tech."
"You okay?" Kara asked. "You're not nearly as playful as usual."
"It has just been a tough week," Lena said. "Coming up?"
"On the edge?" Kara shook her head when Lena nodded. "No way, not all of us could swing to safety."
"Come on, I'd totally catch you." Lena hopped to her feet, holding out a hand to Kara.
"It's the tallest building in the city," Kara pointed out, but placed her hand in Lena's gloved hand anyway.
"I think we already established that," Lena said playfully. "And I won't let you fall," Lena swore, easily lifting Kara up onto the wall, sliding an arm around her waist when she panic wobbled. "You're good, I've got you."
Kara released a shaky breath, her hands braced against Lena's chest. "What do you look like?" She asked in a whisper.
"A green and black spider." Lena answered, and she did, she had put her old suit on to allow Sam to had more to her new suit.
"No, under this." Kara's fingertips played with the mask and Lena panicked a little, she wasn't sure she could say no if Kara started lifting it.
"There is a reason I wear it."
"Can I? Just the bottom half?" Kara questioned.
Lena swallowed and nodded unsurely, "okay," she whispered.
Kara slowly rolled the mask up, stopping below her nose like she promised. "You're human?"
"I am," Lena hummed, acutely aware that she could kiss Kara now, without the barrier of the mask.
And without any conscience thought she was leaning in, her arm holding Kara tight against her, all of the nerves in her body on edge.
But Kara stopped her just before they kissed, her hand on her chest and her eyes closed as she huffed out a breath. "I can't." Kara breathed.
"Right," Lena shook her head, taking a step back but keeping ahold of Kara. "Right, sorry."
"No, it's okay. I'm flattered, really." Kara assured. "It's just- can we sit and talk."
"Of course," Lena took a seat and help Kara sit down, both sitting in silence for a few seconds, Lena pulling her mask down in that time.
"You're great, Spidy." Kara said. "But I like someone else."
"They're luck," Lena said, though she felt something shatter in her chest.
"Nah, they're out of my league."
"Out of your league? Doubtful." Lena said, and Kara looked remorseful.
"I'm sorry, it just wouldn't have been fair to you if it had-"
"Hey," Lena interrupted softly, placing a hand on Kara's knee. "Don't you ever apologise for your feelings, to me or anyone, understand? You owe me nothing, but thank you for being honest with me."
Kara's tense shoulders relaxed, and Lena had to wonder if there was more to it than this, if something like this had happened to her before.
"So, tell me about them?"
"Oh, I don't- are you sure?"
"I am," Lena assured.
"She's-" Kara ducked her head, a shy smile on her lips. "She is something special. The most incredible woman I've ever come across. And I think I have had feelings from her for the moment we met."
"She's lucky,"
"No, I'm lucky," Kara disagreed. "I've never had this with anyone before, being around her is just so easy. I've always been in love with the idea of love but with her it isn't how I ever imagined, it's beyond that, it's infinitely better. She's all I can think about, I want to talk to her every second of the day, I want to spend all of my time with her."
"Does she know?" Lena asked, ignoring the aching in her chest.
Kara scoffed. "Of course not, are you crazy?"
Lena huffed out a little laugh. "Why not? I sounds like it's real."
"For me, yeah, but for her, I'm not so sure. She is one of the most important people in my life, I can't lose her."
Lena frowned, wondering who it could be, maybe Nia? But she had never gotten that vibe from them, plus Nia was dating Brainy. Maybe Lucy?
"Do you think you will?"
"I'm not sure," Kara shrugged, staring out at the lights. "Sometimes I think maybe she feels the same, other times she just... really distant."
"Distant how?"
"Like, we can spend day after day together, doing nothing but be in each other company while we work, then there is nothing for days other than short text messages." Kara sighed. "And I don't think it's on purpose, I think she just gets busy. It just has me second guessing stuff."
"If she is blowing you off then she is an idiot,"
"I don't think-" Kara was interrupted when her phone blared from her pocket. "Hey, Alex."
Kara hummed and nodded along to whatever her sister was saying.
"Looks like I'm the one leaving first for once," Kara commented after hanging up the phone, attempting to move but remembered as was over six stories up, which made her freeze up.
Lena chuckled, taking Kara's arm and helping her down.
"Goodnight, Spider."
"Goodnight, Miss Danvers."