Guiding Star
Written by Aiyumi
Disclaimer: Persona and all related characters are property of Atlus, Inc. Any trademarks that may be referenced in this fan fiction are properties of their respective owners. I am just a fan and do not have any relations to said people/companies.
Chapter 15: The Pink Alligator
Minako was leaving school when a text message from Fuuka arrived in her cellphone. It contained only four words, but brought a wide smile to Minako's face. The message stated, "Spring mornings are pleasant."
Back in the dorm, Minako didn't hear anyone comment anything about their past memories or future plans, but during sleep at night, all SEES members who had remembered the previous timeline were summoned to the Velvet Room.
X:X:X:X:X
"Ah! This is..." Akihiko gasped.
"Welcome to the Velvet Room." Igor greeted everyone.
"And welcome to the spring mornings preservation club!" Junpei grinned and spoke dramatically. "Nice to have both of you on the same page as us, Fuuka and Sanada-senpai. I guess it's only Yuka-tan, Mitsuru-senpai and Ai-chan missing now."
"From the things she kept letting slip, I thought Ai-chan would remember sooner." Minako commented. "What about you two? How did you remember?"
"Right when Caesar awakened, before we knocked Shinji unconscious." Akihiko answered. "When I pulled the trigger on the Evoker, everything rushed back to me at once."
"When Natsuki-chan stood up and walked to the front of the class to say she'd be leaving, everything came back to me," Fuuka said. "As soon as I ran into the others after I remembered, I tried to talk about it but Amada-kun told me that we should discuss these things in private at a special place. So, it's here..."
"Yeah, because Pharos-kun... I mean Ryoji-kun's child form, can't hear what we say while we're here." Minako explained.
"Oh, he had a different name?" Fuuka was surprised.
"Yeah. Since he didn't remember anything about himself, he made a nickname up. He creeped me out a bit in the beginning, but now that I got used to his quirks, I think he's so adorable!" This earned a giggle from Fuuka. "Anyway, I've talked to him a lot, and am confident that we can convince him to help us stop the Fall. I'm really glad that we're managing to change things for better."
"Me too." Fuuka nodded confidently. "Just one more Shadow to go, and it'll be time to stop the Fall. We can do it!"
Minako nodded back. The shattering glass sound played in her head, and the Priestess Social Link shot up to level 10.
X:X:X:X:X
... ... ... ... ...
Minako and Yukari were leaving school together.
"Exams start next week..." Minako commented.
"Yeah..." Yukari sighed. "Speaking of exams, something very weird happened today. Junpei came to talk to me during lunch break and asked school subject questions!"
"Hahaha!" Minako laughed. "Yeah, he's been acting different since the incident during that other full moon operation, when stuff happened between him and Chidori-san. I believe he's determined to change for better!"
"Hmm. If so, I hope it lasts..."
A text message on their cellphones interrupted their conversation. It was Mitsuru, asking everyone to head to the hospital because Shinjiro had awoken this morning!
The SEES members met up at the hospital.
"Shinji!" Akihiko was the first one to speak.
"Aragaki-san!" Followed by Ken.
The others remained silent, but glad to see Shinjiro awake.
Shinjiro sighed in relief when everyone entered. "Are all of you alright?"
"We should be the ones asking you this!" Akihiko retorted.
"I was worried I might've hurt someone again!" Shinjiro justified himself.
"Aragaki, how are you feeling?" Mitsuru asked.
"I'm fine." He paused. "I've thought a lot after I woke up, and it's decided. I'm quitin' SEES."
"Shinji..." Akihiko seemed about to argue.
Shinjiro raised a hand to cut Akihiko off. "No, Aki. This time, it's different. I left the other time because of how wrecked I felt. I felt I didn't deserve to continue livin', and wanted to give up on everythin'. I only agreed to come back 'cause of my guilt, and 'cause I wanted to help Amada. But now Amada's standin' strong, and the only reason why I joined back's gone."
Mitsuru argued. "Aragaki, our mission is a uphill battle. Persona users are hard to come by. We need all the help we can get."
"Yeah, I know you're figtin' an important battle. And I know my reason's selfish, but this is just how I am. Deal with it. Besides, I'm not cut out for this Persona stuff. I caused more harm than good tryin' to use this power. That's not what I want. I wanna go on with my life. From now on, I wanna be more productive, and do stuff I'm actually cut out for. I wanna become a cook. And for this, I've gotta catch up to my life, and make up for this time I lost doin' nothin'. You can argue however you want. This is my decision."
So, Shinjiro had quit last time because he wanted to give up on life. And now, he was quiting because he wanted to continue living. It was quite the change. It brought a warm sensation to Minako's chest, and strengthened the feeling of how she was glad to have succeeded in saving him.
Akihiko smiled. "It's a good decision, Shinji. I'm very glad to know that you've restored your will to live." He turned to Mitsuru. "Sorry, Mitsuru. I understand that you're desperate to have more people helping us, but he has valid points. I think we should respect his decision."
Mitsuru was reluctant, but agreed in the end. "... Very well then. We accept your decision, Aragaki. We wish you the best in your future endeavors."
"Hey, stop talkin' as though we wouldn't see each other anymore! I'll be showin' up at school. I've gotta study a lot to catch up with lost time. And just so you don't say I'm not helpin' you. If I feel like it, I might stop by the dorm to drop some of my cookin' experiments."
"Oh, nice!" Ken said with a laugh.
"If you need to convert metrics again, just ask and I will calculate for you." Aigis offered.
"Senpai, even if you don't have cooking experiments to give us, you can drop by anytime," Yukari said.
"Our doors will always be open for you." Fuuka added.
"If they weren't, I'd break in." Shinjiro joked.
Everyone laughed. Shinjiro's gesture showed that he indeed cared about them, and they realized how these recent incidents had caused Shinjiro and them to get closer.
... ... ... ... ...
That day, Minako began studying for exams again. She studied even during the Dark Hour, but this time, Pharos didn't show up to help her. After three days had passed without him coming to visit her, Minako began to suspect that something was wrong.
"Pharos-kun?" She called out to him. "Pharos-kun, you're there, right? You don't want to help me study this time?"
However, he didn't respond. Minako was getting worried. She tried to recall if something had happened in the other timeline that might have made him upset, but couldn't remember anything. Minako sighed. She wanted to comfort him or listen to whatever he had to say, but she couldn't do anything for him if he didn't show up.
"Pharos-kun, I hope you're okay. If you don't want to talk, fine. I'm here to listen if you ever change your mind. Either way, good night."
Pharos felt bad for making Minako worry and leaving her to talk alone like that. He hadn't forgotten the deal they had made months ago. They had agreed they would confide in each other as soon as a problem arose. In fact, he was the one who had suggested that. Something was bothering Pharos greatly right now. He felt bad about not fulfilling his end of the deal, but he couldn't come out to talk about his problem. He just couldn't...
Since the moment Minako and her friends defeated the latest full moon creatures, Pharos wasn't feeling very well. Even though the defeat of the creatures brought part of his power back, it also brought a nagging, bad feeling.
Pharos had been trying to not think about his nightmare. When the thought surfaced, he immediately dismissed it as nonsense and sent it to the back of his mind. However, with the recent nagging feeling, Pharos couldn't run away from his nightmare anymore. As much as he tried to foolishly tell himself that the nightmare made no sense, he knew that he was only lying to himself. The nightmare made a lot of sense. Actually there were facts to back it up, but Pharos had stubbornly been trying to ignore them. For instance, soon after Aigis joined the group, Minako and her friends went to save some people that Shadows had abducted into Tartarus, and Pharos saw something that shocked him. Aigis used her Persona in battle, and it was the exact same Persona he had seen in that nightmare. Pharos was sure some dreams were based on people's own experiences, and his nightmare could only be one of them. He wouldn't have seen the figure so clearly in the dream if he hadn't known how Aigis' Persona looked like, unless it were a vision of the future, which he was pretty sure it wasn't. The presence of a child Minako in the scene proved that, if the dream indeed had relation to anything, it should be to the past, not to the future.
His nightmare implied that he had met Aigis in the past. Worse, it also meant that Minako had fainted from fear when she looked at him. This made Pharos feel horrible. What if this kind of thing happened again? Those thoughts made him fear that if he kept visiting Minako, he could accidentally hurt her. This was why he was avoiding to come out.
Pharos watched Minako as she went to see that sick guy, Akinari, on Sunday.
"The pink alligator had gone days on without food, because his odd coloration gave his presence away, and all his prey ran off before he had so much as spotted them." Akinari told the story he had been writing. "Dejected and hungry, he slept, joined by his only friend, the bird that could not fly. However, the next time he awoke, he was shocked to find that his hunger had led him to eat the bird. He did all he could to spit the bird out, but his only friend was already dead. So, the pink alligator cried in both agony and despair..."
That story hit close to home. Like the pink alligator, Pharos was different. He wasn't human. He wasn't like Minako's other friends. Pharos didn't know what he was, but the only thing he had ever been sure of was that he wasn't normal, and would never be, no matter how hard he tried. And there was the nagging feeling he had when thinking about the incident from ten years ago which Minako's senpai had mentioned, as well as the bad feeling he began having since the beginning of last week. And that story from Akinari only strengthened his fear of accidentally hurting Minako, his only friend so far, just like the pink alligator did.
However, despite his hesitation, Pharos really wished to talk to Minako again. Ironically, he believed that this was the only thing that could make him feel better. His urge to interact with her grew each day, until he couldn't resist and came out.
Minako went to Club Escapade at night to see how Mutatsu was doing. The old monk had managed to locate his wife and his son, who he had lost contact with. To celebrate, he ordered a strong drink for himself, and a sweet non-alcoholic beverage for Minako.
She cringed. This drink was even sweeter than the one Mutatsu had gotten for her the other time, and gave her shudders. She decided not to complain, though. The monk was in the mood for celebration, and she didn't want to ruin it.
Minutes passed. They kept talking, and Minako managed to get rid of the last of her drink.
"Finished already, eh? That was fast. I'll order a larger one." The monk offered.
Minako's eyes widened in horror. She didn't want to have any more of that drink. She tried to protest, but Mutatsu was quicker and ordered another glass of the stuff, twice as large as the previous one.
They continued talking. Minako didn't so much as touch her new drink. Mutatsu, on the other hand, had three glasses of his alcoholic beverage. He got drunk, collapsed on his chair and fell asleep.
Minako wanted to go home, but she felt bad about leaving without saying goodbye to the monk. She was debating whether to wake him up or wait for him to wake up when the lights went out, the music stopped, and a coffin engulfed Mutatsu as well as everyone downstairs. Only then Minako realized how late it was. It was Dark Hour.
Shortly after the Dark Hour began, Pharos appeared. "Hi, Minako. Good evening."
Minako smiled. It had been a while since Pharos' last visit. "Oh, Pharos-kun! How are you?"
"I'm fine. It's nice to be in a different place again!" Pharos tried to sound cheerful, but Minako could tell something was wrong. "Hmm? Aren't you going to drink that?"
Minako realized he was talking about the second drink Mutatsu had ordered for her. She grimaced. "I'd rather not..."
"Why?"
"I don't like it." Minako answered honestly.
"Hmm..." Pharos eyed the glass for a moment. "Um... do you mind if... if I try it?"
"Go ahead."
"Thanks." Pharos took the glass. He slowly brought it to his mouth and took a small sip of the liquid inside. "This is sweet." He took another small sip, followed by a larger one. "The sweetness is overwhelming...!" And another. "But it's good!" Then, he turned the glass and chugged everything down. Once the drink was over, he left the empty glass on the table. "Sorry. I drank it all! Oh, but you said you don't like the drink, so it's fine, right? Hahahahahaha!" He began speaking loudly and laughing.
"Pharos... kun...?" Minako didn't want to believe what was happening. "No, don't tell me..." She muttered to herself.
"It's so quiet! Why everything has to stop working during the Dark Hour? This is no fun!" He complained, still speaking loudly.
It was true. Pharos drank that non-alcoholic beverage, and now he was... drunk...
Before Minako had time to do anything, Pharos startled her as he abruptly turned around, and ran towards the stairs with a bounce in his step. On his way, he bumped into a chair and almost knocked it over.
"Ah! Pharos-kun! Where are you going!?" Minako shouted after him.
"I want the music!" He shouted back from downstairs. "I'll try to turn it back on!"
Vivid images of the vending machine incident at the Dark Hour in the dorm came back to Minako's mind. This had the potential to be like it, but worse. Unlike that time, Pharos didn't seem to have a grip on himself right now.
Minako climbed down the stairs, but was unsure about how she could get to where Pharos was. If he had indeed gone to check the sound equipment, there were a lot of coffins and cables in the way, and Minako couldn't see much because of the darkness. She resorted to calling out to him instead. "Pharos-kun! You shouldn't mess with the sound equipment! If you disconnect the wires or break something, you'll get the club staff in trouble!"
"I'm not going to break anything!" He shouted confidently.
Minako could hear noises from his direction and began to panic. "Pharos-kun!" She shouted.
Pharos didn't pay her any mind. Minako felt she should go to where the sound equipment was and try to stop him, but her legs refused to move. A few tense seconds followed, and the noises stopped.
"Why...?" Pharos sounded disheartened. "Why doesn't the sound work? I want the music! It's too quiet. Silence is good for thinking. But I don't want to think! I don't want to think about anything... but the thoughts keep coming..."
"Pharos-kun, i-it's enough. C-come back here, please!" Minako's voice shook.
"No!" Pharos shouted and startled Minako. "I don't want to go back there..." He gave a short pause. "You're afraid of me."
Minako was confused. "W-what? What are you talking about?"
"I know you are!" He shouted back.
"No, I'm not..."
"Then why are you panicking?!"
"Uh, I..." Minako trailed off. She didn't know how to react to that strange situation.
"You're afraid of me. It's sad to know. I don't want that. I just want to be your friend, and want you to treat me like all your other friends..."
Hearing that caused a pain in Minako's chest. She didn't know where Pharos' concern had come from, but it made her recall the previous timeline, where she had, indeed, been afraid of him. It was as though the Pharos from the other timeline had decided to open up to her. Was this how he had felt?
Minako took a deep breath and tried to speak in a calmer tone. "No, Pharos-kun. I'm not scared. I was just worried that you might break something in there..."
"I didn't break anything!" Pharos protested as though he had thought Minako was accusing him.
"Then, it's okay. Now, come back here."
Pharos ran out of the corner he had been messing with the sound equipment. When he was halfway to the stairs, he stopped on his tracks. He took a few more steps forward, but stopped. "Minako, Minako..." He murmured. "Minako..."
"What is it? I'm here, Pharos-kun."
Pharos seemed to light up. He resumed walking and approached her. "Please, say it. Say it's true that you don't fear me."
And Minako realized one thing. Drunk Pharos was unpredictable. One moment, he was shouting, and his voice could probably be heard all over Club Escapade. All of a sudden, his demeanor completely changed, and he seemed fragile and vulnerable like a small child.
It was as though the time to make up with the Pharos from the other timeline had come. Minako felt she should be honest. "It's true. I don't fear you. At first, before I got to know you well, I was a bit scared, like in the beginning when you kept disappearing from one spot and appearing on another. But now I know that you don't mean any harm. So, no, I don't fear you."
"Heh heh heh..." Pharos let out a creepy laugh. The fact that he was drunk made it even creepier, and Minako had to resist the urge to recoil, because reacting negatively might upset him. "This isn't a dream, is it?" Pharos asked weakly.
"No. You're awake. And I'm awake too." Minako confirmed.
"Hmm. Yeah, then maybe it's true. You're awake. You're awake!" Pharos startled her and tackled her in a hug. Minako nearly lost her balance and bit her lip to suppress a yelp. Pharos clung to her tightly and kept muttering. "That last night at the beach house, I saw it. You were little. You looked sad and tired. But when you saw me, you froze in fear and fainted. It was so painful to see your face full of fear, then your robot friend appeared, and she came after me and didn't help you and wanted to attack me with her Persona, but I didn't want to hurt her, but I almost, I almost..." He trailed off. "I was so scared and lost and confused, but now I get it. This is another place, and you're here with me, and you aren't little anymore and you didn't faint. That time was a dream, but now is not..."
It was hard to follow what Pharos was saying. But he had mentioned the last night on Yakushima. That was the night he had had that nightmare! And he mentioned Aigis using her Persona to attack him. Could it be that his past had been haunting him in his dreams? No wonder it was hard for him to talk about that nightmare.
"Alright. Pharos-kun, it's okay. Let's sit down."
Seemingly calmer, Pharos slackened his grip on her. But when Minako tried to move, Pharos tightened his grip again. "No, Minako, please, don't leave."
"I'm not leaving." Minako answered. "I just want to find somewhere for us to sit down. Would you let me move?"
Pharos reluctantly let go of her. While Minako looked for a place for them to sit, she held his hand to assure him that she wouldn't leave him. Despite the darkness, she managed to find a table with two empty chairs nearby. She pulled the chairs and had Pharos sit on one of them.
As soon as Pharos sat down and Minako released his hand, though, he blurted in panic. "Aaaaah! Minako, don't go!"
"I'm not going anywhere," Minako said in a calming voice. "I'm right here by your side."
Pharos seemed to have been convinced, and remained quiet for a while. However, not even a minute later, he began to mumble. "Why? So much time passed, and I still don't know... why am I here? Who am I? Why can't I remember?! Why?!" He suddenly raised his voice and slammed his hand on the table in front of him.
Minako wasn't sure whether she should say something or not, but Pharos began to get agitated again, and she felt she should try to calm him down. "You're you. You're Pharos-kun. My little friend that visits me at the Dark Hour, and makes me have fun during this time that's supposed to be scary."
"No... no, it's not... this is not it! What I want to say... i-is..." Pharos seemed to be having trouble to form coherent sentences. "I mean... My identity. My true identity. Why am I here? Why was I born...? Minako, do you know why you were born?"
"Why? You mean, if I think there was some purpose behind it? I have no idea. Actually, I don't think there are many people that can answer this themselves. So, it's normal to not know. I wouldn't worry about it."
"But I want to know!" Pharos insisted. "I'm not normal. It bothers me. I've always known I wasn't, but it's getting harder and harder to deal with it. I tried to summon a Persona the other day, but I've got nothing. I think I don't have a Persona." Pharos sounded ashamed. "Why am I different? I want to understand. But no matter how hard I think, I can't find an answer. I don't know what to do. It's so frustrating. It makes me want to cry. But... the tears won't come out... I think I'm unable to cry, either..."
It was painful to Minako to see Pharos so hurt and distressed. His voice came out shaky and strained as though he were crying, but like he had said, no tears were forming in his eyes.
"Pharos-kun..." Minako gently placed a hand on his arm. "Take deep breaths, and try to calm down."
But Pharos didn't follow her advice and kept rambling. "Minako... people are imprisoned because they did bad things, right?" He spoke slowly and in a low voice. "I got trapped... d-does it mean I'd been bad before? I want to remember my past... but I... I'm scared... what if I had done very bad things? Like hurting someone or..." Pharos shuddered and lowered his head, unable to finish his sentence. "E-even so... can we still be friends? Minako... You're the only friend I have. Please, don't leave me. Please..." His voice cracked as he pleaded.
Minako felt a pang in her chest. Pharos had been pouring his greatest fears right then and there. She wondered whether he had had all these fears bottled up in the previous timeline as well. If he had, then she had utterly failed him back them. She never noticed his problems, and didn't help him when he most needed support.
Minako wanted to comfort him. She had known what he had done... well, not in detail, but he was basically the reason that the Kirijo lab exploded, and so many people died, including her own parents and Yukari's father. Even though he was a Shadow, born from humans' negative emotions and desire for destruction, Pharos somehow developed in such a positive way. He had a very good heart, and actually no desire to destroy anything. To Minako, he was a miracle. He represented hope of changing fate and averting the Fall. Hope for a better future.
"Of course we'll be friends," Minako said firmly. "You're good now, and this is the way I know you. I don't care about what happened in the past. We'll always be friends."
"But..." Pharos paused to gather his words. "I... I keep thinking about the pink alligator from the story, and the way he accidentally killed his only friend, the bird that couldn't fly. I have a bad feeling when I think about remembering my past. I have the feeling that I might be something that you wouldn't accept... that I might accidentally hurt you..."
"Stop worrying. It'll be okay. We'll always be friends. I'll accept you no matter what."
However, instead of settling down like Minako had expected, Pharos abruptly stood up from his chair and raised his voice. "Then, prove it! Prove that you don't fear me, and that you won't leave me." He demanded.
His sudden action startled her a little. "... Prove?" Minako wanted to assure him she wouldn't abandon him like in the other timeline, but she didn't know how. "O-okay. What do you want me to do?"
"Hold me. Take me in your arms."
That was something Minako wouldn't normally consider doing, but the guilt of having neglected Pharos in the other timeline compelled her to do just that. She turned her chair to the side and got face to face with Pharos. "Alright. Turn around."
Pharos obeyed. Minako wrapped her arms around his waist and pulled him closer. She had Pharos sit on her lap and held him gently.
Pharos let out a contented sigh. "Thank you, Minako. You're really kind. Thanks..." He murmured. He rested his head against Minako's shoulder and finally seemed to relax.
Before long, Pharos relaxed completely and fell asleep. Minako held him comfortingly, and occasionally played with locks of his hair. She lost track of time, and couldn't tell how long she had been holding him.
"Hmmm..." Pharos mumbled. "Minako..."
"Yeah?"
Pharos yawned and rubbed his eyes sleepily. He stood up from Minako's lap and turned behind to face her. "I'm sorry. I really bothered you a lot this time, didn't I?"
"No, it's okay." He had been hard to deal with, but Minako thought it was a good thing that he had opened up to her. "Are you feeling better?"
"Yeah, a lot better." Pharos admitted. "I don't remember everything I did, but I remember I ended up saying a lot of stuff I didn't have the courage to say before. I feel as though a huge weight was taken from my shoulders. It must have been a lot of weird stuff to you, but thanks for having listened, and for having put up with me. I hope I haven't caused much trouble..."
Minako smiled in relief. "Good to know that you feel better now, and that you seem to have sorted out your issues."
Pharos took Minako's hand and gently squeezed it. "Minako, thanks. You're the best friend I could ever hope for."
She squeezed his hand back. "You're welcome. I'm glad that I could help."
"I'll leave now. The Dark Hour is almost over." Pharos released her hand. "Bye, and rest well."
Pharos walked away and disappeared. When Minako was about to stand up, she heard the familiar sound of shattering glass, and the Death Social Link ranked up to level 8.
Minako set the chairs back to their original positions and went upstairs. When the Dark Hour ended, Mutatsu awoke.
"Mmmgrrr..." The old monk grumbled and checked the time. "Argh! It's past midnight already! What're ya still doin' here, kid?"
"Uh, you were out cold, and I felt bad about leaving without saying anything."
"Ah ha ha! Thanks for the consideration. Yer really different from the other kids yer age." Imaginary music notes came from Mutatsu's head. "But ya shouldn't walk alone at this time of night. I'll leave with ya."
They left the club. Mutatsu walked with Minako until they had to split ways, but rather than he helping her, she was the one who ended up helping him because he was still a bit drunk and had trouble to walk. The monk tried to appear tough, but Minako was sure he was grateful for her help, and the Tower Social Link ranked up.
... ... ... ... ...
After that,, Pharos came to help Minako with her studies for a few days. He acted normally as though nothing had happened.
On Sunday, Minako went to talk to Akinari again. She found him coughing.
"I stopped taking my medicine." Akinari told her once he had calmed down.
"What!?" Minako was worried. "You stopped on your own, just like that?"
"Yes. It wouldn't fix my condition anyway. It was just to ease the pain and spasming."
"..." Minako kept staring at him with concern.
"My days are numbered, Arisato-san. All I want now is to find the meaning of my life and finish writing that story based on my conclusion. Hopefully I'll have enough time to do it. One more reason to stop taking that medicine. It left me drowsy, and I can't write if my hands go numb."
Akinari's situation was really sad. Minako wished she could do something for him. He was a victim of natural factors. Was there a way to go against that? All Minako was sure she could do was keep him company and help him have an enjoyable time.
... ... ... ... ...
Exams came. After exams, Minako was tired, and didn't stay awake during the Dark Hour.
On Sunday, Minako visited Akinari again. Last week he had given up on taking his medicine. This time he had given up on going to the hospital, which was even more worrying.
On Monday, October 26th, exams' results were posted. Minako had managed to enter the top ten in her class, just below Yukari. Most surprising, though, was that Junpei had scored quite well! Not "top ten" well, but high enough for his standards.
"Ha ha. That's Junpei Iori 4.0 for ya!" He bragged.
"4.0...?" Yukari rolled her eyes.
"I'm giving my best. From my improvements, does it look like less than 4.0 to you?"
Junpei had a good point, and for a moment, Yukari had no response to give him. Then, she gave up and sighed. "Ah, whatever..."
"Seriously, though, I haven't gotten such a high score since elementary school! It feels so good!"
"Nice work. Keep it up!" Minako encouraged him.
"I also hope this really lasts," Yukari said.
"I have resolutions and stuff now, and will keep aiming towards those! From now on, I'll only improve, you'll see!"
... ... ... ... ...
October 27th, Dark Hour.
"In one week, the moon will be full. Only one Shadow. The last one..." For some reason, Pharos didn't sound enthusiastic as he probably should. "Strange, isn't it? I had been waiting for this moment so much. The moment for you to defeat the last of the 12 Shadows and free me from the Dark Hour. But now that it's closer than ever, I just can't feel happy about it. In fact, it gives me a nagging feeling. Maybe I'm afraid that the battle might be too hard for you and your friends, and that something bad might happen to you. Or it might be that I'm afraid of actually remembering more about myself once I'm free. Either way, it means that I'm afraid of something... hahaha." He chuckled sheepishly. "Minako, it goes without saying, but be careful, okay?"
"I will." Minako placed a comforting hand on Pharos' shoulder. "Don't worry, Pharos-kun. It'll be alright."
Pharos nodded, but didn't say anything.
They remained quiet until Pharos broke the silence. "We're here doing nothing. You'd better be using this time to sleep, right? I'll let you rest. Good night."
... ... ... ... ...
That week, Minako managed to max a few of her school Social Links.
The following Sunday, November 1st, Minako went to Naganaki Shrine to see Akinari again. He had given up on his medicine and the hospital. She hoped he was okay.
"Arisato-san. You came." Akinari had a relieved smile. "I have good news. I finished the story about the pink alligator. After he accidentally ate his bird friend, he despaired and cried. He cried so much that he drowned in his own tears. But his tears formed a beautiful lake, and many flowers and a tree with delicious fruit grew around it. The other animals came there often to eat the fruit and relax... but none of them knew that the alligator was the one who had created the lake, or that he was gone. The alligator never found the meaning of his life, but the other animals in the forest did, even though they didn't realize it. And this is the conclusion I arrived at. Everything that we do, no matter how small our actions are, causes an impact on someone else's life in one way or another. So, the meaning of my life isn't something I should worry about. It's the difference I make in others' lives that count, even though I may not realize it."
"It's a pretty deep message. I like it!" Minako praised him.
"I'm glad that you understand the message, and that you like it. I'm relieved that I had enough time to get to this conclusion. It was the answer I had been looking for during my whole life, and I've finally found it. Thank you, Arisato-san. Our talks played an important role in leading me to this conclusion, which already means that you made a big difference in someone's life. Well, I can tell that you're special, and I have no doubt that you're impacting many people's lives, but anyway... I wrote the pink alligator's story in my notebook. This notebook is all I have to leave behind. Since you shared my last moments, I want you to have it. The notebook is under the bench." Akinari stood up. He had a peaceful expression and a wide smile. "Now I have to go. Once again, thank you. And... farewell."
Before Minako had time to say anything, the Sun Tarot card invaded her vision and showed that the Sun Social Link had reached the maximum level. The card disappeared. For a split second, Minako had a glimpse of Akinari's form fading away like an illusion. Then, she startled as though she was waking up from a dream.
"Ka-Kamiki...san?" Minako murmured his last name, but there was no response.
The situation was so surreal. Was it a dream? Minako tapped into her Social Links. The Sun Link was indeed maxed, which meant that the conversation with Akinari just now couldn't have been a dream.
Minako checked under the bench, and sure enough, the notebook was there, just like Akinari had said. Minako's heart tightened as she opened the notebook and flipped it to the end. She read the end of the pink alligator's story, and it was just the way Akinari had described. It was clear now. Akinari was already dead. What happened earlier was just a vision, and his last message.
"Kamiki-san..." Minako whispered Akinari's last name, and tears rolled down her face.
Minako hugged the notebook tightly and cried. Since she had never started the Sun Social Link in the other timeline, she had no idea that Akinari would die so soon. Minako had saved Shinjiro this time around. Once more, she wondered whether Akinari could also have been saved, maybe through a Persona or Social Link-related miracle... but it was too late. Akinari was gone...
... ... ... ... ...
It was Dark Hour, and Pharos came to visit.
"All living beings will die one day. No one can escape it." Pharos was also sad. "Before, I had thought that this was only natural. Well, and it is. But now I think I understand how it feels to lose someone close. It's so sad... but on the other hand, like he said, it means that he caused a big impact on our lives, right? Otherwise we wouldn't feel moved enough to care much."
"Yeah, I guess so..." Minako nodded.
"He has no idea that his words had impacted me too. I'm different, and the pink alligator's story hit close to home." Pharos became lost in thought for a moment. "Minako?"
"Hm?"
"I wonder whether my life has a meaning, and whether I'll ever be important to anyone."
"You're already important to me, Pharos-kun."
"...!" Pharos' eyes lit up, and a bright, non-creepy smile broke into his face. "Y-you have no idea how happy I am to hear this. Minako, thank you."
And the Death Social Link ranked up to level 9.
A/n: aaaaand the Club Escapade non-alcoholic drink strikes again, like in P4! (or, since this takes place before P4, this is actually the first time and not, "again?" Whatever...) The part with drunk Pharos got inspiration from the fic "Winter Pilgrim," by Stealth Noodle (s/9944712), which has a chapter with a drunk Ryoji that's really awesome :D .