Chapter Eight: Hot Time in Hotland

Frisk returned to Hotland via the River Person's boat. With the matter of Undyne settled, he was more at ease, knowing he wasn't going to have her hot on his heels, throwing spears at him every few steps. He looked up at the large building, with the word Lab above the door. With the other way blocked by guards, Frisk had little choice but to head through.

Inside, the lab was dark, but even so, he could see machines everywhere. He walked past an escalator, and was shocked to see what looked like a security console, but what shocked him the most, was the fact that his image was displayed on the screen. Moreover, as he walked, his image on screen moved. He looked up and around, but didn't see a camera anywhere. He looked back at the screen. He moved away, and could see a desk, strewn with papers and books, but it was far too dark for him to see anything clearly. He heard an automatic door slide open. He turned as the lights switched on, and he saw he wasn't alone.

"Oh, my god," she said. The voice was female. She looked like a yellow lizard or dinosaur, wearing a white lab coat and glasses. She was hardly taller than he was, and didn't look dangerous. She looked flustered, fidgeting in place as she looked around. "I didn't expect you to show up so soon! I haven't showered, I'm barely dressed, it's all messy, and-" Frisk stopped her.

"It's all right, Ma'am. I dropped by unannounced and uninvited. I apologize. The fault is mine, not yours." She relaxed at this, but still looked a bit flustered.

"Umm, h-hiya! I'm Dr. Alphys, Asgore's Royal Scientist." She looked a bit scared. "Oh, but I-I'm not one of the, um "bad guys"! Actually, since you stepped out of the Ruins I've been, umm, well "observing" you through my console." This surprised Frisk. "Your fights, your friendships, everything!" Frisk was genuinely surprised by this. He had no idea he was being monitored the whole time. Of course, that made sense. "I was originally going to stop you, but . . ." he watched as she blushed and looked a little sheepish. "Well, after watching someone on a screen, it kind makes you root for them, you know? S-so, ah, now, I'd like to h-help you!" Frisk gauged her for a few moments, and smiled gently.

"I would be grateful for any help I can get," he replied.

"Really?! Oh, uh, of course you would! Using my knowledge. I can easily guide you through Hotland! I know a way to Asgore's castle! I can get you there, no problem!" Frisk gave a sigh of relief. That would certainly help.

"That will most definitely help." She smiled, and then looked embarrassed.

"Umm, there's just one, tiny, little issue . . ." Frisk looked worried. She turned away and scratched her head. "A long time ago, I made a robot named Mettaton. I originally built him to be an entertainment robot. Like, a robotic TV star or something, you know? Anyways, I recently was doing some upgrades, and decided to make him a little bit more useful, give him some small, practical adjustments." Frisk nodded, following, but her tone, and her hesitant nature was giving him a bit of worry. "Like, umm . . . A-anti-human combat features?" She looked embarrassed, nervous, and a bit scared.

"A human-killing robot? Just great . . ." he groaned, arms crossed, rolling his eyes. Of course.

"O-of course, when I saw you coming, I immediately decided to remove those features! Unfortunately, I may have made a teensy mistake while doing so . . ." Frisk stared at her.

"Meaning?" She gulped.

"Uh, that he's . . . now a . . . unstoppable killing machine with a thirst for human blood?" Frisk slapped his forehead with his palm.

"Just beautiful," he groaned. Alphys looked chagrined.

"Um, hopefully, you won't run into him . . ." The room shook as there was a banging sound. Alphys looked around, but Frisk stayed where he was, face still covered by his palm. There was another boom. "Did you hear something?" Frisk didn't reply, staying still as a statue. More booms followed. "Uh oh . . ." The room went dark as the sound of a wall crashing was heard.

"Ohh yes! Welcome my beauties . . ." said a mechanical voice as a spotlight showed a large, rectangular robot. " . . . To today's quiz show!" Confetti sprinkled down from the ceiling and a large, neon sign lowered as multi-colored lights glowed and canned applause played. Frisk groaned and Alphys just stared in a mixture of shock, horror and embarrassment. "I can already tell this is gonna be a great show! Everybody give a big hand to our wonderful contestant!" Canned applause and cheers played as Frisk wiped his face with a groan. "Never played before, gorgeous?" Mettaton asked. Before Frisk could reply, Mettaton went on. "No worries! It's simple! There's only one rule: Answer correctly . . . or you die!" Frisk looked up at him, nonplussed.

"Win, Lose or Die, right?"

"That's right! Looks and brains! I love it! So, let's get started! What's the prize for answering correctly?" Mettaton asked. Four answers, labeled A through D appeared, floating in mid-air.

"More questions?" Frisk asked in a deadpan voice.

"That's correct!" Alphys gave him a thumbs up from where she was standing slightly behind Mettaton. Frisk stayed where he was, arms crossed, looking almost bored. "Now, here's your fabulous prize! What is the King's full name?" The possible answers appeared, but Frisk answered before they all fully appeared.

"Asgore Dreemurr." Alphys looked surprised he answered so quickly.

"Terrific! You're on fire! On to our next question! What are robots made of?" Frisk looked at the answers, and none of them seemed to be correct, but Alphys was making a letter with her hands, a B. He looked, and saw that Answer B was Metal & Magic.

"Metal and Magic?"

"That's right!" Alphys gave him a thumbs up, and he smiled softly. "Too easy, darling? Well, we'll just have to ratchet it up a notch! What was the name of King Arthur's dog?" Alphys looked floored as Mettaton listed the choices: A: Gwynn, B: Merlin, C: Kissy-Pup, D: Cafall. Frisk grinned.

"Cafall!"

"That's right!" Alphys stared in amazement. "Don't get comfy, darling! What was Mozart's first composition?" Frisk smiled as the choices appeared: A: Ode to Joy, B: Symphony No. 5, C: Andante in C, D: Swan Lake.

"Andante in C," Frisk replied confidently.

"That's right!" Alphys stared in shock.

"Oh my god . . . I never even heard of either of those . . ."

"No slouching now! What was the name of the frozen swamp in Dante's Inferno?" Alphys was almost shaking. She had absolutely no idea what he was even talking about. Frisk grinned as the choices appeared: A: Oberon, B: Acheron, C: Infernis, D: The Really Cold Spot.

"B: Acheron!" Alphys could only stare at yet another right answer.

"Oooh! We've got a real live one tonight folks! Okay, let's play the memory game! What monster is this?" He showed a partial picture that looked like Froggit, but Alphys desperately signed shook her head at the choice for Froggit, A, instead urging him to choose D for Mettaton. He frowned, but noticed something was off about the picture, and did as Alphys suggested. The picture pulled back, revealing Mettaton wearing a t-shirt with Froggit's picture on it. "I'm so flattered you remembered!" Alphys beamed and gave him a thumbs up. He smiled at her.

"Keep them coming, Metal Man!"

"You got it! What is the speed of light?" Alphys actually had to think on that one.

"Six-hundred and seventy-one million miles an hour."

"Right again! Ooh, you're just soaring, darling! But, don't get too confident. This next one's a doozy! What is the tallest mountain on Mars?" Alphys stared at him, and looked at Frisk, looking totally lost. Frisk crossed his arms and frowned as the answers appeared: A: Mt. Ebott, B: Mt. Way-Too-High, C: Olympus Mons, D: Mt. Mara. Frisk nodded.

"Olympus Mons is the answer." Again, Frisk was right.

" . . . I didn't even know that . . ." Alphys muttered.

"O ho ho! We've got a budding star here! Well, here's an easy one for you: Would you smooch a ghost?" Frisk blinked at that. He looked, and all the answers were the same: Heck yeah! He looked at Alphys, who shrugged.

"Um, D, I guess?" Another correct answer, but that one threw him a little.

"Great answer! I love it! Now, here's a simple one: How many letters in the name "Mettaton"?" Unfortunately for Frisk, the number of letters began to grow longer and longer. Alphys hurried and signed C for 70, which Frisk gave quickly. "Of course that was easy for you!" The quiz show continued, and while his life was at stake, Frisk was actually having fun. "Now then. In the dating simulation game Mew Mew Kissy Cutie, what is Mew Mew's favorite food?" Frisk's eyes widened and his jaw dropped. That was one answer he didn't know. He'd never even heard of that. Quite luckily, help came from the most unlikely source. Alphys jumped up and down excitedly.

"Oh! Oh! I know this one! It's snail ice cream! In the fourth chapter, everyone goes to the beach, and she buys ice cream for all her friends, but it's snail flavored, and she's the only one who wants it!" She sounded so excited. "It's one of my favorite parts of the game because it's actually a very powerful message about friendship, and . . ." she looked and saw Mettaton with his hands on his hips.

"Alphys, Alphys, Alphys . . . You're not trying to help our contestant, are you?" She looked nervous. "Ooooooooh! You should have told me! I'll ask a question you'll be sure to know the answer to!" She broke out in a sweat, looking like she was about to panic, or faint. "Who does Dr. Alphys have a crush on?" Frisk's eyes widened as Alphys frantically shook her hands at him. He stared as the choices materialized in the air: A: Undyne, B: Asgore, C: The human, D: Don't know. Frisk stared, not sure what to do. He didn't want to humiliate Dr. Alphys, but his neck was on the line. That aside, he really had no idea who she had a crush on. He just met her. He knew he had only a twenty-five percent chance of picking the right one, but he had to try. He was shocked when Mettaton boldly flashed the letter A on his chest. Frisk looked at Alphys.

"Undyne? Really?" She blushed and hid her face in her hands.

"Yes indeedy!" chimed Mettaton, sounding pleased and mischievous. "She scrawls her name in the margins of her notes, she names programming variables after her. She even writes stories of them together, sharing a domestic life. Probability of crush: one-hundred-and-one percent. Margin of error, one percent." Dr. Alphys looked ready to burst into flames from her blush. Mettaton wheeled in front of her. "Well, well, well. With the good Dr. helping you, there's no dramatic tension! We can't go on like this! But, buuuuuut! This was just the pilot episode! Next time, we'll have more drama! More Action! More romance! More bloodshed! Until next time, darlings!" With this, he folded his arms inside, and retracted his wheel, flames spewing from a rocket underneath him. "Mettaton, awaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!" With that, he launched up, crashing through the ceiling, leaving another gaping hole.

Both Frisk and Alphys stared for a long moment at the whole where he had vanished. She turned to him and smiled uneasily.

"Well, that was something." Frisk looked at her, eyebrow raised, arms crossed, head tilted to one side. She chuckled, embarrassed. He sighed gently and shook his head as he turned to go. "Wait, wait!" He stopped and turned back to her as she ran up to him. "I-I still want to help you! Here, let me give you my phone number!" Frisk smiled and brought out the cell phone. Alphys' jaw dropped. "W-where did you get that?! It's ancient! It can't even receive texts!" Frisk looked at the old phone. Sure, it wasn't state-of-the-art, touch screen or any of that, but it had grown on him. "Here, I can upgrade it for you!" Frisk looked hesitant.

"Will it keep the numbers I have saved? They're kind of important." Alphys nodded.

"You bet! I'll just be a minute!" She took the phone and hurried away into her lab. Frisk looked around, but was startled by the sounds of machines whirring, a cat screeching, and other odd noises. Was that a moose he heard? She scampered back in record time. "Here! I put a keychain on it for you, and it can use my special sub-space storage system, too! It can send and receive texts, and it now has a camera!" Frisk looked at the phone in awe. It now had a camera lens on the back, and a few new keys. It looked like she even cleaned it up good, as it looked almost new now. "I also signed you up for UnderNet! The Underground's number one social network! Now we're officially friends!" Frisk looked at her and smiled.

"One does not need some social media site to be friends with someone. Thank you, Dr. Alphys. I appreciate any help I can get." She looked embarrassed at this. She twisted the hem of her lab coat, looking flustered.

"I, um, well. You're, ah . . . Welcome." She chuckled. "I, uh, have to use the bathroom!" she hurried off. Frisk shook his head lightly. She was kind of cute with her shyness. He understood, looking at the upgraded phone before putting it in his pocket. He glanced at her work desk, and saw many empty cups of noodles and soda cans, along with scientific notes on various things. He smiled at the little anime statue of a woman with cat ears. With that, he headed for the back door of the lab.

Frisk had hardly stepped out the door when the phone beeped at him. He brought it up, and it announced that Alphys had updated her status. Whatever that meant. He looked at the small screen, and it displayed windows for a web browser. It displayed the UnderNet, and Alphys' latest post:

I just realized I didn't watch Undyne fight the human. Frisk stared. He was new to social media, having never seen a need or use for it before. He never had an opportunity to use it before, either. He went a few steps, and it beeped again with another status update: Well, I know she's unbeatable, so I'll ask her about it later. It ended with a cute smiley face. Frisk chuckled and shook his head. It was cute, no doubt. Frisk followed the path, and began to see pipes, vents and other machinery everywhere. This was likely where the monsters got their power. Geothermal energy made sense underground. There was another beep, and another status update. Did the thing just keep going like that? For now, I gotta guide the human! I'll call them in a bit! Another cute smiley ended it.

Frisk came to a huge cliff, overlooking a huge pool of magma, giant gears and pistons working, jets of steam and flame everywhere. It was amazing to see. As he moved to go forward, there was another beep and update: I hate using the phone! LMAO My claws are shaking! Frisk blinked at that. He hadn't thought she was that shy. He smiled, and continued onwards. He stopped when he saw some large gaps, and steam vents with arrows on them. Frisk watched, and, having a hunch, he stepped on, and was promptly shot over the gap with a whoosh. He couldn't help a grin. Sure, he was being hurled over boiling magma by steam vents, but it was a bit fun. Frisk traveled through a few rooms like this, not too surprised to meet a few new monsters, but, like most of the others, they were rather nice. Well, most were, but that plane-shaped one was a bit odd, with the way she acted.

Frisk came to a room with a long walkway of pipes and a set orange lasers over it. He glanced at them, wondering if they were merely alarms, or, and more likely, a trap. As he was about to move forward, his phone actually rang. He picked it up and answered.

"Oh, the lasers are color-coded. The blue ones will not hurt you if you stay still, but orange ones, well, you have to be moving, otherwise-"

"They cause damage, right?" Frisk asked.

"Yes. So, umm, that's it. Uh, bye!" With that, she hung up. Frisk was about to walk through the orange lasers, when Alphys updated her status: OMG, I did it! Claws haven't shaken that bad since Undyne called me to ask about the weather . . . He smiled and shook his head as he passed through the lasers, stopping to let a blue laser pass over him harmlessly. Frisk managed to get past without incident, thankfully.

Frisk came to a crossroads of sorts, with steam vents allowing access to east, west and north, but the north one seemed deactivated. He was surprised when Alphys called. He answered the phone as he glanced around. "Okay, the northern door will stay locked until you solve a pair of puzzles to the east and west," said the Dr. Frisk looked back and forth. "I think you should try the one to the west, left, first." Frisk nodded and headed that way. Outside the door, he met a few monsters mulling around, and a blue laser blocking his path. "Hold up, I'll hack into the security grid and disable that laser! Hold on a sec!" There was a pause, some typing keys, and the laser deactivated. Frisk smiled.

"Thanks, Alphys." There was an embarrassed chuckle before she hung up. Frisk saw a pair of flame monsters milling around by the door. One of them dressed like a schoolgirl in a sailor uniform.

"Finally! Someone turned off that laser! It just turned on all of a sudden."

"Yeah! We were hanging out when all of a sudden, lasers and puzzles activated everywhere!" Frisk noted that, and thought it a little odd. He made a mental note of it, and headed inside the door to solve the puzzle. Said puzzle resembled an old arcade game more than anything else, with him having to move blocks out of the way and shoot an energy pellet at a target at the top of the mechanism. It took a few moments, but he was able to figure the solution and solve it easily enough. Frisk exited and crossed the other way, and found a pair of monsters lounging around, talking about Mettaton's show. He went inside, and found this puzzle was even easier than the first, and solved in two moves. He returned to the central chamber, and the door opened when he approached.

Frisk passed through a room of steam vents without incident, and came to a dark room. It was odd, as it felt a bit cooler than the rest of the areas he had been. He also noted that his footsteps on the floor also sounded different. Alphys called.

"Why're all the lights off? Here, lemme just hack into the power grid, and . . ." The lights switched on, revealing Frisk was standing on a set of a kitchen, like those in TV shows. Lights were on, and even several cameras. "Oh, no."

Frisk watched as Mettaton hovered down, wearing a chef's hat.

"Oh, yes, beauties! Welcome to the Underground's premier cooking show!" Mettaton grandly motioned to a glowing title that appeared in the air: Cooking with a Killer Robot. Frisk just stood and watched, somewhere between shocked, embarrassed, and amused. "Pre-heat your ovens, darlings, because we've got a special recipe for you today! We're going to be making a cake!" Frisk rolled his eyes. How original. Mettaton proudly motioned to Frisk. "My lovely assistant will help me by gathering the ingredients! Everyone give them a big hand!" Confetti fell and canned applause played. Frisk lightly huffed, and then thought of a way to make things more interesting, and smiled to himself. "Now then, first we'll need milk, eggs-" began Mettaton

"A cup of cinnamon," said Frisk.

"Yes, some cinnamon," Mettaton said, not at all noticing the sly grin on Frisk's face.

"A quart of peppers," Frisk put in.

"Peppers, yes," said Mettaton, not seeming to pay attention.

"Bologna," said Frisk, trying to keep from smiling or laughing.

"Can't forget that." Frisk suppressed a snicker.

"A bottle of scampi sauce," Frisk said in a perfectly normal tone, Mettaton grabbing everything he listed.

"Just what it needs!"

"Worms and plastic minnows," said Frisk. Mettaton was busy grabbing things from under the counter.

"Yes, we can't-wait a minute!" Frisk fought a grin. Mettaton looked at him, not seeming pleased. "Oh ho ho! You sly dog! I see what you're up to!" Frisk stayed where he was, arms crossed, looking amused as Mettaton adjusted his hat. "This is no cake! This . . . is a quiche!" More canned applause played, Frisk looking a bit surprised. "Beauties, my wonderful assistant has given us an even better recipe! If you think that cake would be something, worry not! Because this quiche will be out of this world! Now that we have everything we need . . ." Mettaton gathered up everything, even the odd ingredients Frisk had suggested, put them all in order on the counter. "We'll just get started-oh, wait! We still need on last ingredient!" Frisk raised an eyebrow as Mettaton brought up a chainsaw. "A human soul!" With that, the robot revved the engine of the death machine. Frisk held up his hand.

"Hold it, hold it, hold it! You can't do that on daytime TV! There's kids watching. Don't want the little tykes to have nightmares, do you?" At this, Mettaton put the chainsaw away.

"You're absolutely right! Darlings, make sure you keep an eye on what your little sweeties watch! Good parenting starts with you!" Frisk nodded his agreement. "Besides, I'm sure some of my wonderful viewers out there might be allergic! So, we'll go back to plan A." Mettaton brought up a lovely cake with pink icing and delicate, doily-like designs in cream on it. "Here we have our wonderful cake, all made up! You can find all the directions on my website, beauties!" There was more canned applause. "A big round of applause to my wonderful assistant and the wonderful Dr. Alphys! Until next time, beauties!" With this, Mettaton once more rocketed off. Alphys called just a few seconds later.

"Wow! You . . . you did it! I-I don't even . . ." Frisk smiled gently as the lights dimmed and he walked off the set.

"I was more playing it by ear, but thanks. But you helped a lot, too."

" . . . I . . . I-I did?" Frisk nodded.

"Yes. You've been a big help so far." There was an embarrassed but pleased squeak from the other side, and she hung up. Frisk smiled and continued on.

Frisk exited the studio, and was greeted by a huge, ominous machine in the distance. It was bigger than most buildings. The bottom, a series of huge pipes and tubes, disappeared into the molten magma. It was a rather impressive sight. Alphys called just then.

"See that big structure in the distance?"

"Kind of hard not to," he quipped.

"That's the Core, the source for all the power of the Underground! It converts geothermal energy into magical electricity!"

"Really? That's amazing. Does it use Elsian reverse-isolation?" he asked. Alphys was silent.

"H-h-how did you-?" he chuckled.

"Call it a guess."

"Um, anyways, there's where we're headed. There's an elevator directly to Asgore's castle inside. And from there, you should be able to . . . go home . . ." Frisk looked at the Core, looming in the distance, before he realized he wasn't just looking for a way out.

"Wait, Alphys! Do you know-" she had already hung up. He sighed, looking back, and made a note to ask her about the mirror later. He put the phone away, and continued on. He came to an elevator for the core, and hit the button. As the elevator hummed and moved, he thought on everything that he had seen thus far. He stood with his arms crossed, thinking on how far he had come, and wondered what was ahead. There was only one way to find out. The elevator stopped with a ding, the doors swishing open, as he was suddenly grabbed by a pair of arms and snatched out of the elevator.