All told they spent the better part of May being flung across the universe in search of Loki's kids. Journey's end finds them latched to the belly of a Cemesian battlecruiser in a stolen atmo shuttle, piggybacking their way home from Shart-elf-hind. Which is the legit name of that realm as far as he is concerned, and Loki can't stop him saying it.
He tried several times during the trip there, but after two months of arguing over Netflix, laundry detergent, and whether or not boar's fat was in any way an acceptable lubricant, Tony's an expert at bickering with Loki. These days he can practically smell a half truth coming off his partner before he even says it, and the little evasions he uses to avoid lying, well he's starting to get the hang of those too.
Sadly he's not the only one showing rapid improvement at boyfriend wrangling. He honestly thought he was going to get dumped the time he lost the Tesseract on Sniffleheim, but Loki decided he'd rather "collect reparations." Which apparently was Asgardian for Tony stealing it back by himself, and then mastering zero gravity blowjobs while Loki read a book. Yeah, not his proudest moment.
Anyway, the point is it's kind of a long time before Tony can do something about he and Loki's communication issues. He's thought about it a lot, and not done all that much. The small size of the shuttle makes alone time rare, which in turn makes serious conversation daunting. If it goes badly, there's no place to hide out until Loki stops fuming.
The situation only gets worse on the planet Molrin, where he discovers Loki doesn't know the word 'rimming.' Practical demonstration seems all-but obligatory. Fun times were had by all, yada yada no big deal. Except that Loki hasn't let Tony top him since. And that's odd because Loki likes to get fucked they way most people like caramel maccchiatos—as often as possible and preferably in the morning. So he assumes he screwed up something and Loki didn't tell him.
Taking all that into account, it's a relief when Loki sits down beside him in the cramped dining booth in the shuttle's kitchen. He's relaxed, or maybe just too tired to be anxious. Still blue and wearing the black tactical suit Tony made for him.
He lets out a soul deep sigh and lays his head back on the seat cushion, careful to maneuver his goat horns between the bench and the wall, and isn't that fucking precious.
It's the little things that get Tony's stomach all gooey. Dumb shit like Loki showing his neck while he's Big Blue or eating peanut butter right out of the jar. Taking-care-of-business Loki is a sight to behold, but now that Fenrir is asleep in the cockpit and the other two are safe in Stark Tower, he's really happy to see the return of feed-me-grapes-like-the-spoiled-boy-I-am Loki. Happy, and horny. Pun intended.
He learned the first time around not to mess with the horns. Or talk about them. Or look at them. They are pretty bad ass though, so now that Loki's eyes are closed Tony can't help but oggle them a bit. He's an opportunist, so sue him. They emerge from the ridge of his eyebrows at a smooth angle, wrapping around his head and circling his ears in sleek curves that remind Tony of a sports car.
He remembers watching Planet Earth a couple nights after sucking off a Jotun for the first time and imagining Loki in a loincloth fighting for dominance. Ridiculous. Also hot.
Tony's a special kind of perv, he's aware, but the idea of Loki ramming his head into some other loser and knocking him around like a rag doll made him smile like a lunatic. Kind of like he's smiling now, caught in the red eyed stare of present moment Loki who is very much not naked and very much not interested in winning Tony's love with primitive displays of manliness. Oh well.
"Problem, sweetheart?" Tony teases. Loki's eyes slide closed again and he grumbles. Nothing coherent, just the usual sour puss don't laugh at me mortal noises. "Yeah, thought so."
The table doesn't give him much room to work, but he isn't about to let an opportunity go to waste. Poking his sleepy boyfriend in the ribs, he lays his head on his shoulder guard and talks into his ear. Loki shivers because Tony leaning on him is one of his kinks. Maybe it's sad that both of them consider loving consensual touch a kink, but that's why it's called a judgement free zone.
"You're tired, I'm horny. Let's make a deal." Tony says.
"I don't recall having to negotiate with you previously." Loki mumbles.
"Yeah, well, you didn't used to have a problem with me taking the lead."
Loki angles another narrowed eyed look at him, like he's considering arguing the point, but thankfully he really is exhausted. Or maybe obliging, whatever, Tony isn't picky.
Loki drags himself up with what looks like a lot of effort and offers Tony a hand. He takes it and does the universally awkward getting-out-of-a-booth-seat wiggle until he's free and, oh, shoved into the kitchen counter. With a hand down his pants. Fuck.
The idea that he is about to turn down a no-strings-attached hand job is unbelievable, but woop there it is. The teenage version of himself will never forgive him, blah blah blah, but come on this is ridiculous.
Loki's just shown him parts of the universe no other human will ever see. He's hacked and twisted and outright broken magic nobody should be able to tamper with. He has fought Beholders, picked through the Marianas Trench lost and found, crossed the fucking river Styx, and climbed the highest mountain in the known universe.
He and Loki have literally dragged each other through stars, around suns, in and out of wormholes like a game of whack-a-mole, and right now Tony just really, really wants to take care of Loki. He wants to tell him it's okay, and well done, and i'm so proud of you, in the only way he knows Loki is willing to hear it. He didn't think it would be that hard. He really should have known better.
Tony maybe allows Loki to rub him off a bit longer than his surprise really warrants. The man has deft hands, fingers just callused enough to drag and warm as bath water in his Jotun form. He knows he's being placated, but Tony never claimed to be a good guy. The man is really intense about it, buttering him up with nice firm tugs and barely there brushes around his balls.
He almost gets away with it too, until he works his other hand in the back of Tony's flight suit to squeeze at his butt and that wakes him up enough to get his brain back online. Someone should give him an award for the effort it takes to put his hands on Loki's chest and push. It's honestly a herculean task, but eventually he pushes hard enough that it would be a little rape-y for Loki to continue, and he withdraws from Tony's pants with a snap of elastic. Huffs like this is all getting a bit tedious for his royal highness.
"You find my services lacking?" Loki growls, face pinched but voice a bit strained. Rejected, maybe. Tony gives him a quick peck on the lips, just because he can't let that stand.
"Almost had me there, but here's how this is supposed to go."
He drags Loki's zipper down and slides his hands back up to grip the collar of his suit. He might make a detour to feel up his chest, but he's not apologizing.
The whole alien gender thing is seriously hot, and after the ice cream he's got a special bond with these boobs. They're broad and flat, not that different from the usual male chesticles, but a bit bigger and a lot softer. Really nice mouth feel without any body hair in the way.
Loki chews his lip when Tony finds the nips and says hello through the stretchy neoprene. Their eyes meet and Loki can't disguise his gasp as anything else.
He pulls Loki back toward the sleeping quarters by the collar, kissing all the way. The suit has loops near the top for just such an occasion, although he might have told Loki they were for holding armor or something. The backwards two-step through the hatch is awkward, but it gets Loki unbalanced enough for Tony to get his back on the mattress, so he'll consider that a bonus.
Ye olde pout makes a comeback once Loki realizes what's happening, so Tony kicks up the momentum and hops aboard the Jotun express. He reaches down to unclip the belt and it fucking disappears, along with all of Tony's clothes.
Curiously, the neoprene tac suit stays lovingly sculpted around Loki's assets, so Tony takes the hint and spreads the front open. His fingers brush symmetrical rows of raised skin as he pulls the fabric further apart, careful to hold it tight so Loki's breasts pop out all cute and needy.
It makes Loki look down, those red eyes strangely vacant as he watches Tony thumbing circles around his nubs. The look might have discouraged him, but after a minute of rather luxurious licking the little buds start going a darker, redder blue and Tony settles in. The last time they did this, Loki's nips morphed to a dusky purple when he was aroused, which is maybe the strangest thing Tony has ever learned about a partner. Mood ring titties, praise Jesus.
Loki seems to know he's lost, because he shrugs the top half of the suit off and puts a hand in Tony's hair, watches him make trips along the roadmap of white lines with his lips. They run from Loki's throat all the way down to the groove of his hips, more of a smooth slope in this form than the cut muscles he has as an Aesir. Tony dances his nails down the middle just to see the way the lines stiffen and rise.
Tony loiters at the waistband a while, deciding whether to venture lower or just leave a hickey as a souvenir.
The growing bulge in Loki's pants makes up his mind. He gives him one hard bite for the road and crawls back up to Central Command. The move earns him a strangled complaint.
"You demand my attention, rebuff my efforts, and now mock my approval of yours." Loki says, "Remind me why I should share this bed?"
"Uh, it's called a negotiation? Offer, counter offer, happy compromise?" Tony blurts out, maybe a little smug with the indigo flush around Loki's ears.
He's ready to carry on bullshitting when Loki plants his hands on Tony's hips and turns them over. He fights it, but Loki pins his arms above his head one handed, and fuck he forgot how hot it is when Loki turns that inhuman strength against him. He's so careful most of the time that it's easy to forget.
"In that case, consider this my counter offer."
And then Loki's free hand starts peeling off his pants like he's George RR Martin writing the next GoT novel. It's barely even an exaggeration, what with the absolutely maddening reveal of Loki's stiff cock, inch by inch until it's hanging there taunting him while Tony's face is so, so far away. Briefly he regrets being a tease, because he adores sucking cock. Especially Loki's cock.
He considers safewording just to get his hands back, but the thought dies along with the rest of his brain at the warm, slick sensation of Loki seating himself on Tony's leg. Fuck he's wet, oh shit, he was not prepared for that. Loki hums, chewing his lips like he's really enjoying himself, and ruts into Tony's thigh.
Dragginh his lower lip between his teeth, Loki uses his free hand to press his dick into Tony's thigh and fucks it. Shit, he wants that hand somewhere else. This is torture, he should have taken the handjob. Seriously, what kind of idiot looks a gift jerk in the mouth.
"Fuck, come on." Tony mumbles, dizzy, trying to think straight despite the constant not quite touch of Loki's leg.
"Make an offer."
"Whatever you want."
"Be specific, love." Loki rasps, and fuck that's the first time. Tony's dazed, definitely a little manic, but he's absolutely positive that's the first time he's ever heard Loki use a pet name without an edge of snark.
"Wanna fuck you."
"Well I wanted to sleep, but now you've gotten me in a state." Loki whispers, "I think I am owed a favor."
"Anything." Tony promises, knowing what an unbelievably stupid offer it is, but finding he's sincere in it. Loki used a pet name, all bets are off.
"We will have to work on your negotiating." Loki purrs and releases Tony's arms.
Loki presses a thumb to Tony's lips, and the smell of both his sexes knocks him for a second. Then Loki shoves the finger in his mouth and all he thinks about is sucking. Maybe it's not the dick he was hoping for, but maybe he can give Loki ideas. Loki's gaze locks on his mouth and he would smile if he wasn't busy being a fucking genius, oh and deep-throating the finger just in case Loki forgot he can do that.
"Open me up with that blasted mouth and you may do as you wish." Loki groans, flopping on the bed. Hands clasped on his stomach, Loki blinks up at him as though he hadn't been humping Tony's leg like an animal five seconds ago. It shouldn't be cute, but ok, it's pretty cute. Bratty, like Loki can be when the mood strikes. Everything about the pose drips confident sex appeal, but Tony notices how he keeps his ankles crossed like he can't quite manage to put himself on display.
"Deal." he says, and seals it with a playful bite to Loki's foot. He shouts, kicking Tony in the neck. They exchange childish grins until Loki nudges him with a toe.
"Go on."
Tony pinches his butt and ducks away before the retaliatory smack can land.
The mattress squeaks when he leans off to rummage through his travel bag. It's an unforgivable mess, so he has to throw bundles of wrinkled clothes out on the floor just to see what he's doing.
He leaves the lube for once, they are definitely not gonna need it tonight, but a condom is probably a good idea. He never did clarify Loki's role in the making of the godlings, and the idea of persuading Loki to pee on a stick in a Planned Parenthood waiting room is deterrent enough.
While he's rummaging for the little square packets that inevitably land at the very bottom of the bag he finds a travel sized bottle of lotion and snags it too, just in case. Tony doesn't actually use lotion, but Loki gets dry skin on his knees and elbows and apparently Tony is smitten enough to toss a bottle in his bag just because Loki might forget. Which is honestly just gross. So domestic.
By the time he crawls back in bed his partner is fidgeting impatiently, his body tense and shimmery with sweat. One hand is soothing his dick with infrequent tugs, but otherwise his whole attention is on Tony, who sits on his feet and shuffles until Loki's butt fits nicely between his legs. He takes in the tempting sight of Loki curled up on his back, his face framed by dark hair and topped off rather majestically by the horns.
Tony almost inhales the condom packet he's trying to tear open with his teeth. Somehow the rubber makes it on his dick, but there is no grace involved. He's too distracted by the feeling of Loki's overheated body to be suave, too entranced by the feeling of his ass rutting against Tony's cock and the sex drunk look on his face.
Shoves Loki's knees to his chest, he folds him almost in two so his hips are at a good angle and his labia spread open and quiver at the sudden cold. The room echoes with Loki's voice as he presses his lips to the the slit and follows the sensitive folds to where they wrap under and around that beautiful cock. He inhales the scent and falls in love.
Loki doesn't have balls in this form, so Tony throws a half second memorial in their honor. It's not a very sincere send off given that they will be back soon, and that they died for a worthy cause. That cause being the inhumanly smooth slip n' slide that he's about to ride with his tongue. He's a pioneer in an alien vagina, and he's about to explore it in the name of bisexuals everywhere. One small lick for man, one giant leap for mankind.
Loki is honestly perfect. Covered in fine, feather-soft peach fuzz and dripping wet. Tony pets him, gently runs a finger along the seam and circles his hole. Loki's dick swells above his opening, right where his clit is when he's feeling feminine, and the meeting of the two is so smooth that Tony can't resist. He licks a wide stripe along Loki's hole and then right up his dick.
Loki keens, curls his fingers in Tony's hair and pulls him onto his dick. It surprises him, but he manages to drag in air through his nose and swallows, allows Loki to guide him deeper until soft pubic hair tickles his nose. He lets experience take over, lets his mouth become a tight, wet hole for Loki to fuck and gets lost in the familiar light-headed rush of sucking cock.
The noises they make are obscene and getting louder as he gags on Loki's erection and massages his entrance with slick, broad fingers. When he tries to pull away Loki lets him, sighing happily and scratching fingers through his hair. He rests his head on Loki's leg and watches his own finger slide ever so slightly in and back out while the pretty white lights dissipate.
As soon as he can see straight he goes back in, runs his hands up and down Loki's legs and stomach while he makes his momma proud. By the time he's done Loki is soaked down there, pliant and so loose that Tony's fingers practically fall in. He gets two fingers in and excavates, curls them up and tries different places.
Loki winces, his hands in the sheets again. Tony pauses. His partner chews his cheek like words are fighting to get out, but he stays still, doesn't safeword. Tony wraps his free hand around Loki's dick and keeps trying, gently presses up and in until Loki jerks, his eyes fluttering shut and his hole clenching around Tony's fingers like a vice.
"Easy, Lokes. Relax." Tony reminds him, keeps his tone chiding because Loki won't accept the reassurances Tony wants to give him.
There's so much he wants to say that he knows will not comfort Loki. Mostly it's the usual stuff, the things anyone would say like 'this is gonna feel awesome' and 'I want to make you come.' But there's also darker stuff that bubbles up from the scant details he knows about Loki's past. Phrases like 'it's okay if you don't like this' and 'you can say no, i won't be mad.'
Maybe one day they'll get there, but it's not tonight. He makes do with a gentle reminder and repeats the stroke, adds a little more pressure and watches Loki roll his hips, watches him process the feeling and inhale deeply. Tony walks his fingers over the bundle of nerves, tries to make it as smooth and sweet as he can and Loki pushes back into Tony's hand.
"There." he says, voice like gravel. Tony curls his fingers on that spot and sets up a rhythm, careful but not gentle and Loki curses long and loud. "Yes, like that, like that."
Tony tightens the hand around Loki's dick and treats him to a smooth, toe curling pull while his fingers brush and grind inside him. It's hard to keep up while lying on his stomach, so he clambers back up to his knees. He has to pause for a bit to get his balance and Loki grumbles at the interruption. That more than anything restores some confidence, and when they start up again it's with a lot more enthusiasm.
Self control isn't really their virtue, so maybe it's not surprising how quickly he reduces Loki to a writhing pool of want, hands clawing at his shoulders and legs clenching around his waist. It's still flattering though, and Tony might preen a bit too much at the way Loki's eyes bore into his and plead for more, harder, there, yes.
He's getting close, Tony can tell, and he lets the hand not buried inside Loki wander up his gorgeous torso. He hisses at the loss on his cock, but Tony doesn't relent. He wants Loki to come just from his fingers, wants to find out what his body can do. Running his free hand over flat breasts, he pinches a nipple and smiles at the way Loki lurches, pleads.
He drags his thumb over the smooth space between Loki's boobs and presses his fingers into the ridged, raised skin around the Jotun lines. Just like that Loki comes, one of those sudden orgasms that seems to shake his whole body apart.
He moans low in his throat and grinds into Tony's hand, shamelessly leaking clear, silky stripes onto his stomach. He soothes Loki through it, massaging his hips and slowing his thrusts as he comes down. Tony pulls out, cups his hand over Loki's mound and presses a little to ground him, maybe help with the feeling of emptiness that Tony always dreads after getting fucked.
"Tony" he pants.
"Yeah." Tony hums, because yeah, that was pretty great.
"More. Again."
"Yeah, yeah okay."
Wild black hair fans out around Loki's face, his flushed neck and half lidded eyes seemingly bright next to the darkness. There are bits of white tangled in his hair and it takes Tony a moment to notice the deep rips in the sheet where Loki's horns shredded it. Jesus fuck that is sexy.
Loki tugs him down by the ears and they kiss. Hips thrusting rhythmically, he grinds sweet little circles that make them both groan and Tony fumbles for the lotion. He had one other thing he wanted to do tonight, and maybe after that rager of an orgasm Loki will let him.
See, he's had a lot of time to think about that first time Loki let him touch his blue da ba dee, and he has some ideas. A hypothesis about the Jotun lines that is really hard to test without Loki going blue again. He asked him about them the first time, and regretted it instantly when Loki quietly admitted that he didn't know their purpose. Or really anything else about Jotuns.
Last time he let that one go, but Loki seems pretty obliging at the moment so Tony figures it's harmless to multi-task a bit and do some science while also giving Loki more awesome orgasms. It's just good time management. Shame he can't use this as an example the next time Pepper decides to lecture him about it.
He squirts a generous pool of lotion on Loki's belly and they both chuckle a little at the gross noise. With two hands he spreads it around until it thins into a dull shine that helps his hands glide smoothly, lets him work his thumbs into sore muscles and sensitive nerves. Loki hums, which Tony decides is his favorite Loki sound. For now. It's hard to choose just one.
He spreads his hands over his abdomen, brushing his thumbs up the grooves between raised white lines and stroking. Loki's breath hitches when he does that, so he starts over at his hip and follows them back up, not touching the peaked edges, just pressing and caressing in between them.
He doesn't make it all the way up because Loki squeezes his legs together and his knees curl into his chest, nailing Tony in the chin. Youch, not cool. Worth it, though. It is so fucking worth it just for the moment of stunned wonder on Loki's face when he puts his legs back down and stares up, panting, bewildered, and turned on.
Before Loki can say something and ruin the moment, Tony grabs his shins and pulls him into his lap. Loki watches, a little shaken, while Tony touches his lines again. Their eyes meet as Loki arches into the feeling and lets out a lovely, deep groan.
"How does it feel?"
"I don't-" Loki says, swallows, "It is strange."
Tony's got a colony of butterflies in his stomach just listening to Loki talk about how he feels. Out loud, in English. He dots more lotion on each thumb and runs them up and back down once more, feeling like his heart is cracked open and bleeding everywhere at the blissful expression it earns him. Loki climbs into his lap and wraps his lanky arms around Tony's shoulders. Kisses him.
Loki trails his fingers down Tony's chest and tugs at his cock, gives it a few spine tingling pulls, and he starts to fill out. He's like a furnace in this form, and his hand leaves a burning warmth everywhere it touches him. Then Loki holds his cock by the base and lines him up and Tony breaks the kiss. He can't stop himself from looking down between their heaving chests and watching Loki sink onto his cock.
Fuck, it's so warm. Tight and absolutely scorching. He can feel Loki forcing himself to relax around it, doing that deep, measured breathing thing that Tony's always giving him shit about. He slides his eyes closed and sucks at Tony's collarbone, licks at the skin and bites when he pushes a little lower.
It's the most tender fucking thing anyone has ever done to him, so good that he feels like the walls are closing in and he's dying. This is it, this is where death finally catches him. Ladies and Gentlemen, here lies the great Tony Stark, genius inventor, who died running like a coward from a somewhat reformed super villain after coming prematurely in his delicious alien pussy. Go quietly, comrad, into that good night.
He's absently stroking Loki's lines while he panics and doesn't even notice he's doing it until Loki shudders, and holds his face like a chick flick. Which is even more alarming than his close encounter of the premature kind.
"I feel you Tony." Loki whispers, wincing like it's a struggle to make audible sounds. "The lines they-" he stutters, licks his lip, "they allow me to sense your emotions."
"No fucking way." Tony rasps, wondering what the hell Loki will make of him, if he'll be repelled by Tony's ridiculous attachment.
Loki's shattered expression gives nothing away, it's just a wash of surprise and glazed eyes, maybe a bit of concern in the tilt of his frown. He wraps a hand around the back of Tony's neck and rests their foreheads together, and it is such a fucking Norse god way of comforting someone that it makes his traitorous heart wrench and flood with affection. Soon Loki's kissing the side of his mouth, pressing his chest flush into Tony's and taking his dick to the hilt.
Clearly they both need a minute, so Tony tilts Loki's chin down and sucks him into a biting kiss that's raw and intense and perfect. He scrapes his nails down Tony's back and moans into the kiss, grabs him roughly around the chin and presses their lips together even harder. Tony's fingers glide up Loki's spine, feeling his quivering muscles and strong bones.
After a moment of hesitation he digs his fingers into the Jotun lines he finds there and follows the winding path around boney shoulder blades and up to silky hair.
Loki moans long, loud alien curses, breaking the kiss and muttering them right into Tony's ear while his body clenches tight around his dick. He fucks himself shallowly, overwhelmed and out of control, angling his trembling hips to get the right friction and grinding hard when he finds it, again and again until he can't anymore. A helpless noise escapes his throat, wordlessly begging Tony to take over and he finds he can't say no.
With a slight bounce Tony rolls them back onto the mattress, throws Loki's knees over his shoulders and thrusts, fast and hard so their hips collide with a wet smack. Loki gasps and arches, grinds up forcefully like he's trying to get deeper. Tony grabs his hips and sets up a punishing rhythm, slams into him and tries to brush against that spot that makes him twist and shout.
Shit, it's so good, so different from the other ways they've done this. It's not tight like his ass, doesn't seem to suck Tony down and rip the pleasure out of him. Instead it envelops him, molds around his cock and takes whatever he gives. It's not even the same as when Loki's female, because he only does that when the memories are too much and he needs Tony to anchor him with something aching and sweet.
He doesn't know why it helps Loki to be certain things at certain times, doesn't know why Loki chose tonight to let Tony do this to him. Because all games aside, this was Loki's choice.
He could have shifted back to Aesir in the kitchen, or in the cockpit, but instead he's laying under Tony in the skin he was born in, accepting thrusts that plow deep, spread him open rough and fast and not at all sweet. He's letting Tony bite his lips and rub his fingers hard into the lines that betray his life's great lie, keening and begging him not to stop.
He is so hard for Loki now, pounding relentlessly even though he's running out of energy, even though his knees are warning him that he's not as young as he used to be. He wraps his hand around the base of Loki's cock and rubs his thumb over the sensitive skin below, a delicate, swollen spot near where they're connected, where his cock is sliding in and out of Loki and lighting him up on the inside.
His other hand plays at the white lines on Loki's thighs, stroking and apparently channeling his lust into Loki's mind. He presses hard, wanting Loki to feel what he does to him, how the perpetual motion of his mind grinds to nothing whenever Loki gasps, the way his gut clenches when their eyes meet.
He slides back down into Loki's gorgeous folds and buries his face in his neck, licking and kissing and sucking on his ear. His fingers dig into Loki's ass, spreading and kneading those amazing ridges so Loki will sense Tony's growing attachment to him, so he'll understand how the fear of losing Loki makes him feel like a tiny spec on the edge of an enormous, unfathomable universe.
Loki moans, squeezes around him and that's it, he can't hold on any longer. He pumps his partner's cock in time with his final uncoordinated thrusts, mimicking the brutal, fast jerks that he always catches Loki giving himself right before he comes. Loki lurches, throws his head back and lets out a choked, broken cry. Tony strokes him through it, squeezes Loki's dick and coaxes as much pleasure as he can while having his own mind blowing orgasm.
His release shakes him down, reduces him to his base components and rebuilds him. He comes back drowning in Loki's sweet kisses, lips against chapped lips, and his consciousness grows from there, a malleable shell wrapped around a core that has shards of Loki stuck in it now. Its raw, unexpected, and when he draws away Loki's eyes are wet, thin tears crawling down his cheeks.
"You enjoy this body." he rasps, "You… you genuinely desire it."
"Of course, Loki." Tony says, blunt, stunned. He likes any version of Loki he can get his hands on.
Loki sobs, curls onto his side and weeps, and Tony's not sure what he did wrong. He's not sure what to do, whether to give him space or hold him down or grab a towel and clean him up. Loki reaches blindly for him and Tony lays along his back, high up on the bed so he can bury his face in Loki's hair and wrap himself over Loki's back and shoulders despite the height difference. He lays the flat of his hand on his sternum, right over his heart, and Loki covers it with his own, laces their fingers and cries.
He talks too, talks like he'll die if he doesn't lance this wound. Tony only understands half of it, partly because Loki's voice is cracking and also because he's switching randomly between languages like he's not sure where he is or who he has to be right now.
He babbles about a woman who loved him, or who thought she did but only really loved a part of him. He recalls the births of his children, confesses with a brittle smile how they came out blue and healthy and perfect and he hated them, called them monsters. The only monster in the room was him, a man who destroyed half a planet of beings whose bodies were created to love, were made to feel and share feelings from one mind to another.
Tony doesn't know what to do about any of it, so he just holds him. He holds him while his skin crackles and changes shapes and he howls in a kind of pain Tony does understand because it's his pain too.
It's Afghanistan and nukes flying through wormholes and Obie standing over him holding his heart, it's the pain of someone trying to be good enough and always falling short. Remaking themselves again and again and again until they're just a shell full of other people's expectations.
He waits for Loki to wear himself out, presses his mouth into his hair and smells his shampoo. When he extracts himself Loki fits perfectly in his arms. Her shoulders are small and her hand is thin and delicate in his, her skin smooth and pale ivory.
He fights the bedding and covers them in the comforter. Grabs the cleaner of the two pillows and lays on his back, pulls Loki under his arm and tucks her head in the hollow of his shoulder. The change in shape did nothing to fix her hair, so he picks at the tangles with his fingers until he can run them all the way through. Manicured nails play with the sparse patch of hair on his chest, and it tickles so he flicks her on the cheek.
"Be nice, or you'll have to beg for it next time." he teases, although it's a pathetic attempt, completely toothless.
"I would enjoy seeing you try." she drawls cooly.
They lay there cuddling for a long minute while Tony mulls over the tangled, amorphous feeling in his gut. Loki snuggles closer and closer until eventually she's just laying right on top of him, pretense gone.
Tony runs his hand down her spine and marvels at the feel of her round, smooth hips, the way she hums and basks in the contact. Finally his thoughts slot together, and he cups her jaw in his hand, runs a thumb over a dark, perfectly angled eyebrow and remembers thick, powerful horns.
"You're more than how you look." he says.
"Astutely observed. Will you next tell me that fish swim and birds fly?"
"I mean it. I don't want to shape you into whatever suits me or, or fucking hell, my agenda." Tony says.
Loki bites her lip, and even if the rest of her face is stoic Tony knows he got through. He runs his thumb over the spot Loki bit, and kisses her lightly. She keeps her eyes closed, answers him from right over his mouth.
"I know, Anthony. I know."
He smothers Loki shamelessly. Lays all over her in his sweaty, pale-assed glory and kisses her until she's tired of kissing him. Holds her until she's annoyed and superior and demanding he take a shower.
Soon they will have to get up. They will have to separate themselves and scrounge for clean clothes. They will eat food, wake up the puppy, and take him to the penthouse. Soon time will move on and new problems will reveal themselves, so right now he soaks up every second Loki will allow him, and that's enough. It's so much more than enough.