A/N: Hey everyone! I'm finally back with another chapter. Sorry it's been so long.

I want to thank each and everyone person who has reviewed: lexieconextreme, DarkFlameFantasy, snowlikestardust, liliDreamer89, la-hija-de-Dios, Sskyblue, LeChick, kagomeinu18, kushina410, Guest MJ, and two other guest reviewers. You guys are amazing! Thank you so much for your comments! Thank you also to all those who favorited and/or followed this fic. I hope ya'll enjoy this new chapter. :D

Special thanks to kagomeinu18 for not only leaving a sweet review but also messaging encouragement. Thank you so much!

Oh and la-hija-de-Dios...you're exactly right that Dr. Cassidy and Dr. Quinn are Dr. Clint Cassidy from the tv show Doc and Dr. Michaala Quinn, Medicine Woman! I figured someone might guess Dr. Quinn, but I never thought anyone would recognize Dr. Clint Cassidy. So a virtual cookie for you! :D

All right, on to the story now.

Disclaimer...not mine, just borrowing.

Chapter 6

It was like he was in a fog. First, he became aware he was lying on something soft. Then there was something making his nose itch. He twisted, trying to make the itch stop. That's when he noticed a strange sterile smell. Pain hit him a moment later, starting from his head and then flaring out to every inch of his body. That's when he put the pieces together. He was in the hospital. Again.

But why?

Edward groaned. Probably because of a fight. But what fight? He tried to bring the memory up but only got a headache for his trouble. Everything was a blur. Though he thought he remembered the colonel being there. And a promise of some sort? Well, he might as well wake up and open his eyes. Maybe Al could tell him what happened…

Wait, Alphonse!

Edward's eyes snapped open as he looked around frantically for his younger sibling. A gray blob appeared in his vision with two red dots that passed for eyes. Alphonse.

"Brother! You're awake." The armored boy cried, sounding relieved. "How are you feeling?"

The initial adrenaline that had surged through the older boy was quickly receding. Alphonse was here and safe. It didn't look like he'd suffered any damage whatsoever. That was good. As the adrenaline faded, Edward became aware once more of the terrible throbbing in his head and body.

"Owww. Ugh, what happened Al?"

"You don't remember?"

Edward tried to bring his hand to his head but stopped. There was something in Alphonse's words that pricked at his mind. Forcing his aching eyes to focus, he studied his younger brother. Alphonse stood over him, looking down at him. His expression naturally could not change, being that he was a soul attached to armor, but that didn't mean Edward wasn't able to know how his brother was feeling or guess what he was thinking. And right now his brother was worried.

He opened his mouth to reassure the younger boy, but a cool baritone spoke before he could.

"Good to see you're awake, Fullmetal."

Edward sluggishly turned his head towards the door beyond his brother to see the last person he wanted. "What do you want, Colonel?"

A black eyebrow arched at Edward's annoyed demand as the man strode into the room. That was when Edward noticed that underneath he long black coat wasn't the usual crisp blue uniform, but rather black pants and a collared white shirt. Had he ever seen the colonel out of uniform? Ed didn't think so. It was bizarre.

"Well, it seems you're coherent this time. That's something."

"What's that supposed to mean?" A wave of dizziness washed over him before the words even fully left his mouth. Edward groaned and pressed a hand to his head.

"You don't remember?" Dark eyes studied him hard, seeming to look right through him. It was a talent the colonel had that the young alchemist had quickly learned to hate. And right now, confused and miserable as he was, the last thing he needed was Colonel Matchstick around. Not when the colonel's question was a direct echo of Al's. What happened? He knew he was in the hospital, but he had no idea how he ended up there.

"I'm sure it will come back to me," Edward said, trying to brush it off. He swallowed hard, trying to maintain a strong front. It wasn't working, but Edward's pride wouldn't let him show weakness in front of the colonel. It was bad enough he had to admit it to Alphonse. He was the big brother! He couldn't afford to be weak like this.

Mustang frowned. The older alchemist looked like his usual annoyed self when Edward caused him trouble, but something in the man's black eyes made Edward uneasy. A fire burned there, and Edward had the sinking feeling that he probably didn't actually want to know what had happened. Mustang turned to Alphonse. "The nurse should be here any minute with the wheelchair. Is he ready?"

"No, he's not ready," Edward snapped, irritated that the older alchemist was talking as if he wasn't there.

"Oh, uh, yeah, I think so." Alphonse replied, hesitantly, also disregarding his brother.

"Hey! No, I'm not! Where are my clothes?"

Alphonse didn't turn to look at him. Looking at his brother's armored back, Edward's stomach bottomed out. Why was Al ignoring him?

"Good. I'll meet you at the entrance." With those words, Mustang turned and strode out.

"Hey Al! What's the big idea? I need my clothes." The last thing Edward wanted was to wander around in the thin hospital garb he wore.

Alphonse sighed. "Your clothes were ruined. They had to throw them away."

That was ominous. Edward bit the inside of his lip, studying his younger brother. The suit of armor seemed hunched and radiated with distress. Immediately, Edward gentled his tone. "I'm sorry, Al. But I'm okay now. Right?"

Two eyes the color or red fire stared down at him. Alphonse didn't say anything, but he didn't have to. Edward could practically hear the younger boy's resounding 'No'. Swallowing hard, Edward looked away first, unable to keep holding his brother's gaze. Silence seemed to choke the room and Edward twisted his fingers in the covers.

That's when a nurse came in with the wheelchair, breaking the tension. She smiled at the brothers in greeting. "Are you ready to go, Mr. Elric?"

"He is. Come on, Brother."

Between the nurse and Alphonse, Edward was easily moved from the bed to the wheelchair. Embarrassed and irritated, Edward crossed his arms and sulked. It wasn't because his headache had increased or he was feeling cold. No, he was just fine and wanted privacy to talk with his brother, that's all.

Alphonse began pushing the wheelchair and soon they were headed down the hall. Edward squirmed, uncomfortable. In the weeks following that day, Al had done the same thing while Edward had recovered from automail surgery. It wasn't supposed to happen again. Edward was the older brother, not Al. He was the one supposed to be taking care of Al.

Reviled one.

A shudder shook him as the words suddenly echoed in his mind. Wha-where did that come from? Something happened, he knew that, and whatever it was had been enough to scare his younger brother and infuriate his commanding officer. But suddenly he didn't want to think about it. Not if it included that creepy voice. Instead, Edward tried to focus on the present. It took a lot more effort than it should have. Stupid aches and pain.

"Where're we going, Al?"

His younger brother didn't answer right away. He kept pushing the wheelchair, his metal feet clanking on the tile floor. Edward twisted, trying to look up at Alphonse and a wave of vertigo washed over him. Biting back a moan, Edward slumped back in the chair, miserable.

"Al?" This time he couldn't keep the pleading note from his voice. He couldn't bear his brother ignoring him like this.

"You're still sick brother. The colonel is taking us home."

Edward had the misfortunate of being in the clutches of doctors far too often, and hospitals particularly since he became a State Alchemist. There was no way they released him from their cold clutches when he was still sick. No, this was wrong.

Before the blonde could demand an explanation, a cold gust of air hit as they went out the hospital's main entrance. With a whine, Ed tried to curl his legs up to his chest. Squeezing his eyes shut, the blonde tried to push aside the feeling and focus on getting answers. There wasn't time for this. He needed to know where Al and the colonel were taking him and why.

"Here, Al. Put this on him."

Something soft and warm wrapped around him, blocking the cold. He sighed with relief. That was better. For a moment he drifted, and in the distance he could hear Alphonse and Mustang talking. Edward couldn't remember feeling this tired in a long time. Still, he stubbornly tried to get his brain to think and pay attention to what was going on. Alphonse wouldn't take him out of the hospital for no reason. And the colonel wouldn't let him, right? Usually, Colonel Jerkface made him stay whenever he was admitted, refusing to let him leave until the doctors gave the okay. It was annoying. Taking him out so soon just didn't make any sense.

Apparently, the two were done talking because the colonel was opening the back door of his car when the teen re-focused. Edward was surprised to realize it was Mustang's car and not one of the military ones. Alphonse lifted Edward and settled him into the seat, tucking the blanket tight around him as the chill made him shrink under it. For the first time, Edward actually wished he'd been able to stay in the hospital. At least in the room he'd been warm!

Alphonse stepped back, and Edward looked up at him. He had to know.

"Why?"

The younger boy made a humming sound, as if he didn't know what to say. Dread was building in Ed's chest, making breathing more difficult. "Al please. Tell me why."

Mustang waved Alphonse around to the other side of the car and the younger Elric obeyed. Edward focused his golden eyes on the colonel, glaring and trying hard to hide the plea with demand. "You're talking in your sleep," the older alchemist explained shortly. Then he shut the door.

Edward blinked, confused. Why did that matter? The hospital was denying him treatment because he talked in his sleep? That was just stupid! Alphonse entered the other side and Edward shrunk away from the cold metal armor. His brother looked at him for a moment. Then, in a hesitant voice, "Are you okay, Brother?"

The colonel had climbed into the front seat and turned the car on. It was the sight of his dark hair and head in silhouette that triggered the memory. Mustang had walked away, declaring he was of no use to him. Mom. Edward sucked in a harsh breath. He'd been dreaming about Mom too. And Alphonse. About them leaving, about his sins, and how worthless he was.

"Brother?" Alphonse asked, sounding more concerned.

No. No, he wasn't okay. He doubted he'd ever be okay again. But he couldn't admit that to Al. Keeping the blanket up so his brother couldn't see his face, he mumbled, "I'm fine."

He understood now why they were taking him out of the hospital. Alphonse had told him before that he sometimes talked in his sleep. If the nightmares he'd been having were any indication, he was probably yelling on top of that. And he could very well reveal his sin to the world and Alphonse would pay the price. Edward trembled, whether from cold or the fear he didn't know. Stupid, stupid, stupid!

The car was silent, save for the rumble of the engine and the whistle of wind as they drove along. Edward stared dully out the window, barely registering anything they passed. Another memory niggled in his mind. He remembered strong, reassuring hands and the sound of a steady heartbeat in his ear as a deep voice ordered him to breathe. Must have still be dreaming. Yeah, he had to. There was no way he'd clung to Colonel Bastard like a desperate little child. There was no way that ambitious bastard had made him feel safe by simply staying with him, by being there. Nope, no way. He was Edward Elric! He didn't need anyone except his brother, Alphonse. He certainly didn't need stupid Colonel Mustang around to reassure him.

Refusing to think about it further, Edward focused his attention on glaring out the car window. Not that there was much to see. There were street lights and shadowed buildings. The occasional other car. Nothing really of interest.

Edward was barely awake when the car finally stopped. It felt like they'd been driving for hours. Distantly, he heard Mustang and Al talking again and the click and thump of doors opening and closing. He curled up further. He was so cold. And yet he felt like he couldn't breathe because the air was as thick as soup.

"Come on, Brother. Let's go inside."

He curled up tighter as a gust of wind swept through the open car door. No, he didn't want to move. He wanted the ache in his bones to go away, to feel warm and not cold. A large leather hand rested on his shoulder and he shrunk away, teeth chattering with cold. No, he didn't want to get out. He was at least somewhat warm here.

"Fullmetal."

Edward knew that stern tone. There was no getting out of this. With a groan, Edward started to unfold. He stopped as another cool autumn breeze blew by and curled back up under his blanket. Why did it have to be so cold?

There was a sigh. "Alphonse, the front door is open. Go ahead and take your things inside. I'll get him."

Wait, Al was leaving? Edward's head snapped up, but Alphonse had already moved away. The colonel stepped up to the door, peering in at him.

"You know the faster you get out of there, the sooner we can go inside where it's warm. Unless you want to spend the night shivering in my car?"

Edward glared at Mustang, not amused. It faltered as a tremor hit and he winced. No, he really didn't want to stay in the car. Finally, grudgingly, Edward uncurled his legs and slid towards the edge of the seat. That was when he noticed he only had a pair of socks on his feet. How was he supposed to walk in socks?

The answer came a moment later when strong arms plucked him up from the seat. Edward gave a surprised squawk as he was lifted and settled on the colonel's hip, the man's arm underneath his rump.

"What are you doing?" Edward demanded, flailing in the man's hold. He couldn't keep it up long. It was so cold and he just didn't have the strength.

"What does it look like?" Mustang had that stupid smirk on his face as he closed the car door with his shoulder. "I'm carrying your shrimpy hide inside."

"WHO ARE—" A cough cut into Edward's furious rant. And then he couldn't stop, he couldn't breathe.

"Easy there, Edward." Mustang sounded somewhat rueful, but Edward was too busy trying to catch his breath to care. Vaguely, he perceived a hand rubbed his back. He was glad for it. Then, as the cough slowed, he realized exactly what was going on. Colonel Mustang was carrying him and patting his back like he was nothing more than a child, not a teenage alchemy prodigy.

Mortified, Edward tried to order Mustang to stop. The words were swallowed by more coughing. When at last it stopped Edward found himself slumping in Mustang's hold, completely exhausted. A hand was still rubbing his back.

"Not…a baby," he ground out, voice cracked and gravelly. But his words were lost in the folds of Mustang's overcoat. He shivered, unconsciously pressing closer to the colonel's warmth. They were moving, Edward realized distantly, and then suddenly the cold evening air was replaced by pleasant heat. He waited, expecting Mustang to put him down. He didn't.

"Follow me," the colonel said.

I can't. You'd have to put me down first idiot, Edward thought sourly.

They were moving again and this time Edward could hear the clanking steps of his brother behind them. Funny, he didn't remember the hallway at the barracks being so short or the stairs being so close to the entrance. He tried to look around but gave up when his head gave a protesting throb. Groaning, he dropped his head onto Mustang's shoulder. This was pathetic. He was pathetic.

Edward was so caught up in his misery he didn't realize they'd arrived. It wasn't until Mustang was shifting his weight and lowering Ed down that the teen became aware of his surroundings. The room was dark, lit only by the moonlight that streamed in from a window across the room.

The bed sheets were cool and decidedly not where Edward wanted to be. Why couldn't Colonel Flamebrain put him somewhere warm? Couldn't he tell how cold Edward was? At least Mustang had finally put him down. Edward really didn't want to think about the future teasing he'd receive after being carried like that. He batted away the man's hands as the older man tried to lay him down, determined not to give the colonel any more ammunition.

Mustang stepped back. "I'll let you get him settled, Al."

There was the thump of the colonel's boots slowly receding. His brother's large leather hands took over, helping Edward settle into the bed and snuggly under the covers. Already, Edward felt warmer. He was more than ready to go back to sleep, but knew he needed to talk to Alphonse. It was wrong for Alphonse to be so worried about him.

"Hey, Al?"

There was a pause before Alphonse answered. "What is it, Ed?"

"Something bad happened, didn't it?"

The younger boy didn't answer. Instead, he fussed with the blankets on the bed. Then at last: "Yeah."

"But everything's okay, now? I mean, I'm sick, but not hurt. That's good right?" Edward knew he was doing a poor job of hiding the plea in his words but couldn't help it. He couldn't remember what happened yet needed to be able to reassure his brother. It was the least he could do.

"Sure, Ed." Alphonse didn't sound relieved in the slightest.

"Al," Edward whispered, but didn't say anything else. What else was there to say?

"Fullmetal."

Growling, Edward glared at the interloper. Mustang had returned to the bedroom, a steaming cup in his hand. Why didn't Ed hear him come in?

"Sit up."

"Why?" Edward demanded, not in the mood for the colonel's orders. He had just laid down for crying out loud! As it was, this was the second time the brothers had been interrupted and Edward's patience was gone. He needed to clear the air with Al.

"Just do it, Ed." Alphonse's dull words cut. Swallowing, Edward meekly obeyed. It was a lot harder than it should have been. His muscles contracted, protesting the movement and he groaned.

"That's the fever. You'll feel better once it breaks."

Edward paused, mind finally connecting the dots. He knew he was sick, but he had not recognized the signs of fever. That was why he felt so cold and hurt so much. It was also why his dreams were so horrible. He was an idiot. Of course, it was a fever! Edward could only vaguely remember one other time he had a fever and he'd been much younger. Maybe that was why he felt like a train ran over him and then done it again for good measure. A cup was held under his nose, interrupting his thoughts.

"Drink."

Edward studied the cup suspiciously. Just what was the colonel trying to give him?

"It's tea with honey, Fullmetal. Now drink."

Scowling, the teen obeyed. He was relieved to find the liquid wasn't super hot, but rather just warm with the tang of the tea and sweetness of honey. When he finished, he handed the cup back to Mustang. The dark-haired man seemed satisfied, taking the cup and leaving the room again. Edward looked at Alphonse who hovered nearby anxiously. His earlier apathy seemed to have passed. It was both a relief and disconcerting. The blond was too tired to puzzle it out however.

"How are you feeling, Brother?"

"I'm—" a yawn interrupted him "—fine."

"You should get some sleep."

Edward hummed a reply, already half asleep as he sunk into the pillow.

Sometime later, Edward 's gold eyes snapped open as cool words slithered through his mind. I have now sent him on where he will no longer be hated.

Disoriented, he glanced around. Where was he? The room was dark and what he could see wasn't familiar. This wasn't his dorm room. Worse, he was all alone. Alone, in a strange room, in the dark.

No one will notice, you see. They never do.

Terror gripped him. "AL!"

The blond tried to scramble out of bed, desperate to find his younger sibling; to apologize and beg Al to stay. He landed on the floor with a thud, tangled up in the blankets. He fought against his prison, desperate to break free. The ground was wet beneath him, warm and sticky. Blood, he was lying in blood.

Surely if you were so well loved you, a child, would not have been here. Not alone. If you really loved this brother of yours, you'd be with him and not here.

Edward screamed.

"Brother!"

"Fullmetal!"

Hearing his name, Edward anxiously looked around. Alphonse knelt next to him, his armored body seeming to vibrate with apprehension. "Ed?"

"Al, where—where were you?"

"I'm sorry, Ed! I was just talking on the phone with Winry. The colonel suggested I call to see if there was anything we could do about your automail because of your fever."

Fever? Oh, right the fever. The fever was what was causing his nightmares to be worse than usual. Edward had not thought that was even possible. Then he wasn't lying in a pool of blood?

"No," Mustang said firmly. "Your sweat soaked the sheets. There is no blood."

Edward blinked. He had not even realized he'd asked aloud. It was a relief however. He slumped back against the floor, all his energy gone. Was this what a wash rag felt like when it was wrung out?

"Oh. Hey Al, what'd Winry say?"

Why'd Alphonse call her? All she'd do would be worry and probably cry knowing her. His automail was fine. So what if it hurt? He was used to it. Nothing to be done about that. He blinked, realizing Alphonse had been talking, but he had not heard a word.

"Huh? Al?"

His younger brother shifted, metal clanking. "I'm here, Brother. Everything's okay."

Alphonse's leather hands pulled Edward up then lifted him up onto the bed. The bed was soft, welcoming after the hardness of the floor. He looked up at his brother and started as a shadow moved out of the corner of his vision.

Reviled one.

Edward couldn't suppress a shudder. Who had said that?

A cool hand on his forehead startled him. He looked up to find Mustang's mouth was pressed into a thin line. "Your fever's still high. Lay down."

Edward was too busy trying to process the fact that freaking Colonel Mustang had just put his hand on his forehead to check his temperature to comprehend his words. Instead, he gaped at the man, confusion mounting. What was this? No one had taken his temperature like that since Mom. He shied from the thought a moment later, his stomach twisting uncomfortably.

Apparently, the colonel was tired of waiting for Edward to listen because Mustang gripped his shoulders firmly and guided him down on the bed.

"Wha—"

"You need to rest, Fullmetal."

No, he didn't. He needed the cold to go away! And for Mustang to stop acting so…so weird. Sure, it was a nice weird, but weird all the same and the idiot needed to stop it! It was just an act anyway. Why was he even bothering? Oblivious to Edward's thoughts, Mustang produced a dry blanket from somewhere and put it over him. It was soft and instantly warmed the teen.

Ed squirmed, trying to get comfortable and not think about the dark-haired man watching him with a worried frown. It didn't mean anything. It didn't. None of it did.

Reviled. Unloved.

His fingers curled into the sheets hard. No, he wasn't going to think about it. That stupid voice could go to hell and leave him alone. Alphonse was here with him. Even Colonel Bastard was here. He was not…unwanted. Shutting his eyes tight, Edward turned over so his back was to the room, determined not to dream anymore.

The clock was chiming midnight and Roy was exhausted. Not surprisingly, getting Fullmetal and his brother to his home had been the easy part. The difficult part was naturally the boy himself. Of course, the fever spiked again. Of course the nightmares were back with a vengeance. The kid could never catch a break.

Edward whimpered, face wrinkled in fear, his flesh hand grabbing at the man. "Don' go."

That was another thing. The kid had been saying things like that since the fever returned. Roy was certain he would never forget the desperation, the sheer terror on Edward's face as he fought the nurses back at the hospital. He also doubted he'd ever forget how the younger alchemist had clung to him and had been so afraid he would leave. Having it repeated, even without the intensity from earlier was unnerving. Just when had his presence become so important to the young alchemist? For that matter, when did Roy start liking that he was?

He shook his head and pushed the questions away. Now was not the time to be thinking about those things.

"I'm not going anywhere, Edward." Roy picked up a fresh rag and soaked it in the cool bowl of water. Gently, he brought it to the boy's sweat soaked face. The blond's nose scrunched, and he whined.

"Easy, kid," Roy muttered, not stopping his ministrations. Once he'd wiped Edward's face, he lifted the boy up and moved to the back of his neck and his shoulder where the automail was. The boy was too hot and despite all the sweat, his fever had yet to break. Roy finished with the cloth and put it back in the small bowl of cool water on the nightstand. Gently he lowered Edward back onto the bed. The child moaned again, hands once again curling into fists and gripping his shirt.

"It's all right."

Silently, he cursed. Great job reassuring him, Roy thought bitterly. Honestly, the colonel was out of his depth. Making the decision to bring Edward and Alphonse to his home had been mostly impulse because of what the doctor said. But now that the brothers were here it had never been more obvious how clueless Roy was around children.

"Coln'l?" His feverish charge blinked bleary golden eyes up at him.

"I'm here."

"Al? Where's Al?"

"Your brother is getting some more tea." Roy quickly reassured him. "He'll be right back."

Alphonse wasn't just making more tea. He was, hopefully, looking through the older alchemist's book collection and finding something to read. There was no need to share that with Edward however. The younger Elric wasn't fairing much better than his older brother. While Al had waited with Edward in the hospital, the older boy's nightmares had continued. He had also woken several times and asked questions, only to forget and ask again the next time he woke. When Roy had asked Dr. Cassidy if that was normal, the man had explained the fever was the cause. It was necessary to closely monitor Edward, but he wouldn't be in any danger unless the fever didn't break within the next twenty-four hours. Roy had hardly been reassured by that. He certainly didn't share it with the upset twelve-year-old hovering at his brother's bedside.

After seeing Alphonse's distress, the colonel had resolved to keep the boy occupied. The older alchemist asked the younger boy to make more tea or bring a fresh basin of cool water. Suggested calling Edward's mechanic to ask if there was anything to be done to keep the automail from overheating too. Alphonse knew what he was doing. How could he not? The boy was just as smart as his brother. But Alphonse did as Roy asked and he could only hope it helped some.

Edward sniffed, oblivious to the colonel's thoughts, fingers curling tighter into the colonel's shirt. Roy was surprised his shirt wasn't ripped yet. With a sigh, he decided to get comfortable. There was no chance of getting out of the teen's grip, not unless he wanted to take off his shirt. He was too exhausted to muster the effort. And there was no need to worry about the embarrassment of being clung to like a security blanket. Roy doubted Edward was aware of what he was doing. Probably wouldn't even remember it.

Shifting the boy over, the colonel scooted so his back rested against the headboard. To his bemusement, Edward twisted and wriggled until he was practically in Roy's lap. Heat radiated from the boy like a furnace.

Absently, Roy let his hand rest on the blond's head, stroking the sweat-soaked strands. He could just see the bruise underneath and it kindled the flame of his anger. While small, it was a deep blue and purple that stood out starkly on Edward's pale skin. Damn, he wished he could bring the Diamond Malum back and kill the bastard slowly with his flames. The kid had been right next to a dead man when he and the team found him. Lying in his blood. Between that and the nightmares where Edward was mumbling something about being reviled, Roy did not think he had hated someone so much.

"Do—do you hate me?"

The question startled the older alchemist from his dark thoughts. He stared down at the blond head, grappling to wrap his tired brain around the unexpected inquiry. Where in the world had that come from?

"Don't be ridiculous, Fullmetal." Roy snapped, anger still hot.

Roy felt Edward flinch, seeming to shrink even further into himself. His anger was swept away by guilt. Damn it, he couldn't let his irritation get the best of him. There would be a time a place to berate the boy, but it wasn't now. Whatever had prompted Edward's question it was clear he needed a honest answer. Roy awkwardly cleared his throat, desperately wishing Hughes was here to tell him how to handle this. Exactly what was he supposed to say?

"Edward," he began roughly, then stopped. Gathering his thoughts, Roy tried again, gentling his tone. "Edward, look at me."

When the boy finally turned and lifted his chin and eyes, Roy had to force himself to keep breathing. The fear and despair in the Edward's gold eyes ripped into his chest, making it difficult to find air, much less words. Swallowing hard, Roy forced his lungs to accept the air before he began speaking.

"I don't hate you. Do you drive me crazy and frustrate the hell out of me with your antics, your disrespect, and your recklessness? Absolutely." Edward cringed and Roy hurried on. "But I do not hate you. I could never hate you. You're my subordinate. Do you understand?"

For a moment, the boy's gold eyes were clear as they searched the colonel's expression for a possible lie. Roy met the boy's uncertain look steadily, making it as plain as he could that he meant it. He cared about his young subordinate, as he cared for the rest of his team. After all, he was responsible for them. But with Edward there was something else, something that stirred his protective instincts in a snap. It led to impulsive decisions like bringing the young alchemist to his home when he was sick with a fever and sitting with the kid when he was too afraid to be left alone. He couldn't explain it to himself, much less to Edward. But, hopefully, what he said would be enough.

At last, Edward nodded, slumping against the colonel again, head pillowed on Roy's stomach. To Roy's relief, some of the tension had left the young alchemist's shoulders. Maybe, finally, the boy would get some sleep.

Several minutes ticked by in calm silence. Roy was having a tough time keeping his eyes open. Edward was breathing calmly against him, the room was dark save for the light of the moon coming in through the window, and he was comfortable. He was asleep within minutes.

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