(A\N: Thank you guys so much for your support! I really appreciate it! I just guessed about the date, so I apologize if I'm wrong. Take care. Love, Ellivia22)

Disclaimer: If I owned Teen Titans the original series would've had more BB\Rae. What can I say, I'm a loyal fan :D

Lost Without You

Chapter 6 Raven's Wish

The sun rose high on January 16th, like any other day. The birds outside chirped their routine, unaware of what day it was. It wasn't just any day. According to his journal entries, today was Beast Boy's birthday. He would've been fifteen.

I had spent most of the morning in deep meditation. I had to, otherwise Rage would resurface again. I was still extremely angry at the other Titans because of what I learned. If I saw them again it would be even harder to keep Rage from finishing them off. They deserve it, but I'm not like my father. I do not kill people. The Titans have been smart to stay away from me since Rage appeared.

This afternoon I planned to visit my depressing cafe for a change then stop by the mall to pick up something to honor Beast Boy's birthday. This evening I was going to visit his grave-something I hadn't done since he was laid to rest.

Knock Knock

I floated to the ground. Which Titan was brave enough to knock on my door? I tried to ignore it, but the knocking persisted, more urgently this time. I gritted my teeth, prepared to let whoever it is feel my wrath (and hopefully not letting Rage out in the process.)

I swung the door open with a bang. "WHAT?!"

Starfire stood outside my door, her entire body shaking in fear. "I-I just wanted to say goodbye."

I noticed that she had two enormous pink bags at her feet, both completely full. It looked like she had packed her entire room in them. Her red hair was messed up, and it looked like she hurriedly put on her outfit. I crossed my arms, but said nothing. I was not in a forgiving mood. She made sure to avoid my gaze. "I am returning to Tamaran. I cannot stay here any longer. It haunts me."

"As it should. You deserve it," I said icily.

Tears fell down Star's face. "I know. I had no right to treat Beast Boy the way I did. You have no idea how much I regret it and wish I could take it all back." She choked on a sob. "I hate myself so much."

I thought about all the nights since Rage's appearance that I would hear Starfire cry herself to sleep. I also thought of the times I caught her crying in her room, or in the kitchen. I knew that of the three Titans, she held the most remorse.

"I want to forgive you, Starfire, I really do. But I can't. Beast Boy ended his life because of your actions. Because of you I lost the one person I truly loved." My cold gaze subsides slightly as I looked at my former friend for the last time. "Good luck in Tamaran." Then I slammed the door shut again.

BBRae

Fifteen minutes later I entered the living room. I was on my way out to start my plans for the afternoon and prepare for tonight. I stopped short when I realized that I wasn't alone. Starfire was standing by the silver elevator doors with her two pink bags over her shoulders. Silkie was under her arm, resting on top of one of the bags. Robin was grasping her wrist tight, extreme distress on his face. Cyborg stood a distance, right behind the couch, also watching the scene before us.

"Starfire, please,'" Robin said in an unnaturally high pitched voice. "Don't go."

Starfire hung her head slightly. "I am sorry, Robin, but I must."

"Why?"

"Because I cannot forget what I have done to Friend Beast Boy, and how my actions had hurt him and Friend Raven. There are too many haunting memories. Especially today."

"What's today?" Robin asked.

"BB's birthday," Cyborg said quietly. Robin glanced at Cyborg briefly, then turned his attention back to Starfire. I stared at both Starfire and Cyborg. I didn't know that both of them remembered what today was. For the first time I noticed that Cyborg's human eye looked bloodshot. Starfire's eyes were growing green as she glared at Robin.

"You had no idea, did you, Robin? Or you just did not care, because you hate Beast Boy. You probably always have! That is why you were so against us hanging out with him when this whole mess started!"

Robin looked as if she caught him off guard. He opened his mouth but no words would come out. Starfire sighed. "It does not matter. The point is Friend Beast Boy is no longer here because of my actions, all of our actions. I shall try to repair my troubled heart by returning to Tamaran. Goodbye, friends."

She pulled herself out of Robin's grip and entered the open elevator. "I love you, Starfire. Please don't go!" Robin pleaded.

Starfire stared at him for a long second. "Goodbye Robin," she whispered. Then the elevator doors shut tightly before Robin could take another step.

Instead of going after her, the Boy Wonder crumbled for the first time ever. He fell to his knees, his head buried in his hands. I was too far away to see if he was shedding tears. His shoulders shook violently.

I felt no sympathy toward Robin. I felt extremely justified instead. I knew I shouldn't, but I couldn't help it. Robin now knew what it felt like to lose someone you truly loved. He deserved it. He was the one who hurt Beast Boy the most.

I glared at Robin coldly, not caring if he couldn't see it. "Now you know what feels like to lose your true love."

Using my powers I teleported myself out of the tower. I had to get everything ready for tonight.

RaeBB

The stars shone bright as I made my way through the Jump City cemetery later that night. It was cold, and the snow was deep. There were countless rows of headstones belonging to the citizens of the city who had passed on before. Since Beast Boy was a hero he was placed in a separate part in the cemetery, near the middle. The lamps were still on in the cemetery, so I had no problem finding my destination.

Beast Boy's headstone was made of a smooth black stone, provided by the city. In the left hand corner was a green dove. It was obvious that I wasn't the only one who had paid respect on his birthday. Countless bouquets of flowers were laid on the grave. It also looked like both Cyborg and Starfire were here too. Right below the gold letters that marked his name was a green book called "The World's Greatest Jokes", along side what looked and smelled like a large Tupperware containing lots of tofu and a bottle of barbecue sauce.

Slowly I went to my knees and placed the wrapped video game beside Starfire and Cyborg's gifts. I read the headstone.

Garfield Mark Logan

born: January 16, 1990

died: November 7, 2004

A true hero

A tear slid down my cheek, followed by another. I hadn't cried in two weeks. It felt good to let a little emotion out. "I miss you," I whispered, stroking the smooth headstone gently. "You have no idea how unbearable the tower is without you. I understand why you left. To be honest, I don't blame you."

I squeezed my eyes shut tight. I sighed miserably. "I wish I could see you again."

"Then open your eyes, Raven."

The voice rang out in the silent cemetery. I thought it was just my imagination at first, because it was so soft. Then it spoke again, a little louder this time. This time I recognized the voice.

"It's all right."

I opened my eyes, then shut them tight again. It wasn't possible. When I opened them a second time I realized that what I was seeing was true. "B-Beast Boy?" I stuttered.

It was as if I was staring at Beast Boy through a misted window, but he was there. He was standing beside his grave, right in front of me. His skin was still green, but extremely pale. There were dark stains on his purple and black uniform. My heart pounded, still unable to believe what I was seeing.

"You left me," I said, still staring at him.

His ears dropped slightly. "I know. I'm sorry."

I wanted so badly to wrap my arms around him and kiss him, but I knew that there was no point. My fingers would go right through him. "I don't blame you for ending your life. The others were so cruel to you. I wish I knew sooner. Worst of all, I wish I had told you how I felt sooner."

"But you did tell me, and it comforted me greatly in my last moments. Because of your confession I had the ability to remain close to you."

I smiled as I remembered all the times I felt his presence. "I bought you a video game. You know, for your birthday."

His face broke into a toothy grin, something I hadn't seen in forever. "Wow thanks. Things really have changed."

"Yeah," My eyes lowered to my hands. "The team hasn't been the same. I know Star and Cy are really missing you and feel very remorseful. Robin is still a cold bastard, probably always will be."

Beast Boy knelt in front of me. His face turned serious again. "You need to forgive him, Raven. The others too. I have."

"I don't know if I can. They're the reason you're-." I couldn't bring myself to utter the word 'dead.'

"If you don't, it will destroy you in the end. I know what's going on with your emotions. The only way to save them is by moving on. Go on with your life. Then when the time comes, we will be together again."

I swallowed the large lump in my throat. He wanted me to forget about him. There was no way I could do that, nor did I think I had the strength to forgive the others. I promised myself to try; for Beast Boy. "I'll try."

DING!

The clock tower that was located in the middle of Jump City started to strike loudly. I glanced at my communicator. Midnight.

"I have to go. Now that I have finally seen you one last time I can journey to the afterlife and be with my parents. It's time." I knew that Beast Boy wasn't going to be with me forever, but I wasn't ready for him to leave yet. He looked at me seriously once more. "Promise me something, Raven."

DING!

The clock continued to strike, but I ignored it. "Anything."

"Promise me you won't end your life just so you can be with me."

I nodded, a tear spilling down my cheek. "I promise."

DING!

Beast Boy's already almost transparent form started to fade. He reached out and touched my cheek. Even though I couldn't feel his touch, my insides felt warm. "Goodbye, my Raven. I love you."

"Goodbye Beast Boy. I love you, too."

DING!

When I blinked again, he was gone.