5.
She tried not to give him a bona fide hand-job, she really did.
It kind of helped that they weren't actually skin-to-skin, thanks to her gloves.
What didn't help was the way his dick practically leapt into her hand when she reached for it. Or how, when she set about removing the sparse hair scattered along the base of his shaft, its turgidity seemed to increase.
The thing was, she did have to grip his cock firmly, and rotate it in all directions to make sure she didn't leave any stray hair behind. She even had to tug on it a little, this way and that, bending closer and examining it carefully.
With a sharp breath, his hand shot out and gripped her wrist. Bella was stunned for a moment. She really hadn't taken this guy to be the kind who would try to harass her.
Before she could voice some kind of protest, though, he opened tortured eyes and raised his torso half off the bench with an impressive play of abdominal muscles.
"Please," he whispered. "Could you stop a moment? I need…"
She followed his line of sight and gasped, hurriedly straightening. How had she not realized that she was standing there with her face practically in his lap? Clearly, his dick was happy with all the attention, if the glistening precum was anything to go by. It looked one lick or a couple of tugs away from erupting.
"Ohh r-right," she stammered. "I'll just step out and you can … there's a washroom through there if you need it, or, oh here, I have tissues."
She took a slight step back, but couldn't quite bring herself to let go.
For a beat, their eyes met and neither of them breathed. It felt like time slowed down. It felt like nothing else existed except for the two of them, the deep green of his eyes, and the warm weight of his cock in her hand.
Then he cut the connection between them, laying back with a suppressed groan, and Bella hurriedly unhanded him.
Without another word—not that one was needed—she rushed out of the room.
"What happened to you?" Alice asked, pausing on her way to the stock room.
Bella blinked. "I'm not entirely sure, but do you think you can come by later? This has been by far the freakiest work experience I've ever had. I need you to hammer some sense into me."
"Freaky? Like, how freaky? Does he have piercings in his piercings or something?"
"No!" exclaimed Bella, making shushing motions. "Nothing like that, just… weird for me. Weird how I've been reacting to this guy. That kind of freaky."
"Oh, ok," Alice relaxed her stance. "That's alright. The usual human condition. Attraction, the tension… don't you see baby, this is perfection," she sang out the last line before wriggling her hips in a very Shakira way.
Laughing when Bella tried to swat at her, Alice skipped away nimbly.
…
Fortunately, there really wasn't any way to sexualize a hairy ass.
Upon returning from her little break, she was relieved to find that her client had once again draped the small towel over his crotch, and more importantly, that his cock had once again retracted into the other dimension or wherever it was that it usually disappeared to.
She quickly positioned him on all fours facing away from her; then got straight to work before any other wayward thoughts could derail her concentration.
She didn't even stop to admire his muscular glutes, though she may have sent up a prayer thanking the Lord that he didn't appear to have eaten beans in the recent past.
He sat up when it was done, long legs dangling off the side of the bench, his towel still strategically kept in place with one hand. As she stripped off her gloves after going over the aftercare routine, she finally allowed herself to look at him again.
He looked far more relaxed than when he had walked in less than an hour back. His green eyes smiled at her, though his lips were noncommittal.
"Thank you," he said. "You've got magical hands. You made it a lot easier and definitely less painful than I'd anticipated."
For some reason, his words made her blush. "I'm glad I could do that, sir," she finally managed.
"Please call me Edward," he said, and this time his lips smiled right along with his eyes. "I think after all we've been through, that kind of formality is a little redundant."
…
"And then?"
"Then he went and paid. And left." Bella shrugged, pouring some more wine into her glass.
"That's all? That's your story?" Alice pouted. "Bella! I thought he asked you to be part of his harem, or like, some sex orgy at his local swinger's club, or something really freaky."
"But it was freaky!" Bella protested. "This wasn't normal, Alice. I'm a professional, and I'm good at what I do, and I do not go around molesting my clients."
"Ah come on, he wasn't complaining," Alice muttered around the rim of her glass.
"That's not the point. What was wrong with me, sexualizing him the moment he walked in? Judging his cock?" Bella shuddered.
Alice shook her head. "Nothing wrong with you. Human nature, I told you. I went out with that dick I waxed, remember? The ten inch dick that I didn't get to try out?
Bella giggled. "Oh yeah, how did I forget that? This guy was different, though."
"Because he didn't ask you out? I think he missed his chance 'cause he was embarrassed," Alice said airily.
"No, not that… I was thinking of the way his dick just grew and grew. I was thinking, he could be one of those dudes on dickstagram."
Alice spit out her wine. Wrinkling her nose at the mess, Bella tossed a paper towel at the mess.
"Whatsta-gram? Is that even a thing? Wait, how do you know about it?"
"I'm assuming it's a thing. You know, for the guys who grew up texting dick pics, it's the logical next step… post their weenies on social media with filters and cartoon arms and moustaches and who knows what."
Alice gave that the serious consideration it deserved, then nodded. "Yeah, like that guy with the cartoon-ified dick on tumblr. What was it called, again?"
They stared at each other intently, before Bella snapped her fingers and sat back. "Things my dick does."
Alice reached out to high-five her. "Yes, that's the guy. Didn't it get pulled from there, though? It was definitely the highlight of 2015."
"Maybe," Bella shrugged. "Tumblr is weird and exhausting with all the porn content that disappears and reappears. I mean, after a point, I stopped searching because I didn't know what to search for."
"What did you search for?" Alice asked, curiously.
Bella opened her mouth, then shut it with a snap. "It doesn't matter. Thing is, these days instagram is the place to go for all kinds of hotness. Oh come on! I know you follow all those tattooed hotties on insta, so don't look so shocked."
Alice giggled and nodded. "Alright, I think I get the point. All the wannabe dudes who love their dicks will obviously make the most of it."
"Precisely! I knew there was a reason you're my best friend."
They clinked their glasses and drank deeply.
"So, you thought he was a dickstagrammer, huh?"
"Well, yeah!" said Bella in a tone that implied it was all very obvious. "Hello, magical dick that can go from zero to like, sixty in thirty seconds! Just think if you had boobs that could do something like that."
"Oh, you mean, like if they were this sized," she presented her modestly proportioned bust, "when I wanted to wear a tank top or a strapless dress, but grew to like, here…" her hands stretched out to mime generous watermelons, or perhaps her idea of double Ds, "when I want a cleavage in a v-neck, or if I wanted to try tit-sex, or something."
"Exactly!" Bella nodded enthusiastically. "Expandable, super convenient, hot without the under-boob sweat."
"Buy the pretty bras in whatever size is available," exclaimed Alice.
"Never have to suffer backaches because the girls are too heavy."
"Girl, you're a genius!" Alice said, appraising Bella in the light of true admiration and more than a little inebriation. "You just single-handedly solved the problems of thousands of women around the country. Not just the country… the world!"
"Thank you," Bella nodded bashfully, before poking a finger inside her glass to make sure the wine was all gone. "I do what I can." A small hiccup. "Saving the world is hard work. You carry on. I'll be there," she waved in the general direction of the bedroom.
Alice nodded sagely. "You go on."
Ten minutes later, both women were passed out, comfortably tucked into Bella's bed.