Author's Note: For some reason I was really struggling with this chapter but hopefully you will like it :)
You know the drill, all mistakes are still mine :)

CHAPTER 19

Elizabeth tried to pry out any details about Kate but Neal remained silent and just smiled at her.
It was obvious that Neal had a crush on this Kate, perhaps his very first crush and Elizabeth couldn't stop smiling at that adorable thought.
When they stopped at a red light, Elizabeth could hear Neal shuffling a bit before finally breaking his silence.

"'Lizbeth?"

He said, struggling to pronounce her name.
He waited until she looked at him in the rearview mirror before he managed to wipe the smile off her face.
"Why was there a man watching the house?"
Elizabeth frowned, the boy hadn't looked out the window yesterday and the only time he had been outside he had been in the midst of throwing a temper tantrum, had he still managed to spot the FBI agent guarding their house?
It actually didn't surprise her, the kid seemed pretty observant after all.
She sighed, trying to find any explanation for the man's presence that the boy would actually believe, but she came up short.
So instead of driving home, she took a turn for the bureau.
Maybe Peter would have a better lie to tell the boy, or if they were forced to tell Neal the truth she didn't want to do it alone.

Neal was puzzled, Elizabeth didn't answer his question and when he brought it up again, she told him to just hold on.
Next thing he knew they were parked outside the bureau, what was going on?
Before getting out of the car, he placed his flower on the seat next to him so it wouldn't break or get lost while he was away.
Elizabeth grabbed his hand and together they walked into the building, riding the elevator up to the 21st floor.
Peter was standing by Jones' desk, his back turned towards them, and whatever Jones was telling him it didn't seem like good news.
Neal could read body language enough to see that the man was tense and also very tired. He felt guilty about that, he hadn't exactly made it easier for the exhausted adults.
Neal broke free from Elizabeth's grip and ran towards the agent and threw his arms around his legs and hugged them tightly. Neal looked up at Peter and flashed his most adorable smile at him.

"Hi Peter!"

The agent couldn't hold back his smile and he immediately seemed slightly more relaxed.

"Hi Neal"

He answered before ruffling the boy's dark curls.

"What are you doing here?"

Neal shrugged while Elizabeth caught up to them and gave Peter a serious look.

"I need to talk to you"

Neal had been confined to Peter's office while the adults were standing outside, speaking to each other in hushed voices.
Neal plopped down on Peter's chair, and since he had nothing else to do he started to spin around.
Neal had always wanted to ride a carousel but he had never been allowed to go, but he imagined that this is what it felt like except better.
His spinning was suddenly interrupted by someone placing a hand on the back of the chair.
Neal giggled as the world around him was still spinning, but when he could finally focus on the adults' faces, his giggles died down. They looked serious and uncomfortable as if they really didn't want to tell Neal what was going on.
They seemed to be struggling with words, which caused Neal to become anxious. Elizabeth was the first one to speak.

"We've been trying to keep this from you because we didn't want you to worry"

Neal almost scoffed at her words, they didn't want him to worry? He had done nothing else since they started acting weird.

"Keller escaped from prison"

Elizabeth continued while Peter crouched down in front on the boy, forcing eye contact.

"That's why there's a guard outside the house. Keller's not going to get you okay?"

Neal nodded, he wanted to believe that they could keep him safe from Keller but at the same time he feared the man with all his might.
He tried to blink away his tears so that no one would notice them, but apparently he didn't succeed because Peter stood up and then lifted the boy off the chair and gave him a comforting hug.
Neal threw his arms around Peter's neck and buried his head in his shoulder while trying to collect himself. Then he suddenly remembered the event that took place this morning and he lifted his head again to look at the adults.

"I'm sorry about before"
"It's okay, sweetie"

Elizabeth answered, giving him a sweet smile.

"Why were you so angry, bud?"
"I was angry and scared. You were acting weird and I thought-"

Neal interrupted himself and looked down, biting his lip. He wasn't sure if he should tell them his fear, what if they were actually thinking of it or what if they would laugh at him?

"You thought what?"

Peter's voice was soft and kind and it made Neal's doubts go away. They wouldn't laugh at his fear, right?

"I thought you got tired of me. I thought you were gonna give me back"

He admitted before tensing as he waited for laughter but it never came, instead Peter hugged him closer to his chest while Elizabeth rubbed her hand on his back.
She gently grabbed Neal's chin and forced him to look up at her.

"Listen to me Neal. We are never, NEVER giving you up, alright?"

Neal nodded before he once again hid his face in Peter's shoulder, this time to hide his tears.

None of them wanted to tell Neal about Keller, it should be an adult thing that only they had to deal with, but Neal wasn't a normal child.
You couldn't shut him out from this without him realizing that something was wrong and they wanted Neal to trust them, how could they expect him to do that if the kid knew they were lying to him?
Besides eventually they realized that Neal would probably find a way to figure it out anyway, so after a lengthy discussion they both decided that they had no other choice.
The boy handled the news pretty well, he tried to seem calmed by the FBI's protection but the fear was evident in his eyes.
She thought it was bad enough that the boy was scared of Keller but then he revealed the reason behind his tantrum and her heart broke.
Neal honestly thought that they were acting weird because they decided to return the child. They had been so tired and so occupied with Keller that they hadn't even considered how their behaviour affected Neal.
Elizabeth hated herself for not saying 'We're going to look at the school' or something like that so that Neal knew that she wasn't driving him to the social worker.
It was a big reminder of how damaged and insecure this child really was, it seemed like he always expected the worst and that he always assumed that everything that was wrong was because of him.
Elizabeth made a vow to do her best to prevent Neal from ever feeling like that again.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

As Peter left the bureau he was frustrated, there were still not even a sighting of Keller anywhere, even if both the FBI and the NYPD was involved.
Peter returned home and felt some of his worries disappear when he saw that there was still an agent watching the house and nothing seemed to have happened.
This was confirmed when he walked inside and he was met by a delicious smell from the kitchen and the sound of cartoons from the TV.
Neal was snuggled up in the couch, clutching a flower tightly in his hands. Peter frowned, normally the boy would be clutching a toy, not a flower.
He walked into the kitchen and greeted his wife.

"So what's up with the flower?"
"Kate gave it to him"
"Who?"

Peter wracked his brain trying to remember who this Kate was but he came up short.

"A girl at school. He wouldn't tell me about her, but I think he has a crush on her"

Elizabeth told him, smiling lovingly. Peter chuckled, he could clearly remember his first crush when he was in Neal's age.
He returned to the kid and sat down next to him, looking at the flower.

"I heard you might have a crush on Kate"

He said causing the boy to blush and look down before he shook his head.

"So what's she like?"

The boy remained silent. He could remember his own father coaxing him to talk about his crush and he had been so embarrassed but at the same time he had really wanted to talk about the girl.

"You can tell me, I won't tell El. It will be a secret between us men"

Neal giggled at that and it seemed to work because he looked up again.

"Kate is tall, really super tall"

He answered sounding amazed by the girl's height.
It wasn't hard to be taller than Neal, he was pretty short for his age so most of his classmates would be taller than him.

"Taller than me?"

Neal giggled again and shook his head.

"She has brown hair like me and blue eyes like me and she's really nice"

It seemed like Neal really liked this Kate.
Just as Neal was about to talk about her more, Elizabeth showed up to tell them that dinner was ready. Neal immediately put his hands over his mouth while giggling, because that was not obvious at all.

"What are you boys up to?"

She asked but Neal just responded by giggling again before getting up and running over to the table.

Neal eventually forgot about Keller being free, he got distracted by drawing, playing with Satchmo and watching a movie with Peter and Elizabeth.
It wasn't until Keller visited him in his dreams that he remembered that the criminal was on the run and what Keller had done to him.
Keller wasn't alone, his father was there too. They were both laughing and taking turns hitting Neal.
Then his mother showed up and he thought he was safe until she handed him a bottle of pills and told him to eat them all so that they could be together.
Neal closed his eyes and screamed, hoping that it would scare them away. The laughter died down and was replaced by whimpering and whispering.
He opened his eyes and instead of seeing Keller or his parents he saw Peter's face.
A hand touched his head and he flinched and looked up, relaxing as he saw that it was just Elizabeth.
He was placed on her lap with Peter kneeling in front of them and Satchmo whimpering next to the man.
They tried their best to calm the child down but it didn't work, Neal didn't want to go back to his dreams.
Eventually they gave up and he was allowed to sleep in their bed.
He had never been allowed to sleep in any adult bed before, not even when he had the worst nightmares. He was always told to suck it up and go back to his own bed.
Lying there between the adults with Satchmo on the floor and the FBI agent outside, Neal had never felt safer.
Keller didn't scare him now and he could easily fall asleep, this time with a smile on his face.