Disclaimer: I don't own Tom and Jerry.

Okay, it's time for a new chapter. Please review!

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Insanity Chapter 6: The Chapter Without a Plot

After the 'Tyke and Spike Go Missing Incident', also known as the 'Santa Claus Turns Evil Incident' and the 'Tyke Acts Like a Fool Incident', things were back to normal in the Tom and Jerry household.

Tom was in the living room the next morning, drinking his coffee. He was simply minding his own business.

Then, Tyke ran down the stairs. He jumped to the bottom and ran to Tom. Tyke jumped up in the air, and hit Tom with a baseball bat.

Tom was knocked the ground, spilling coffee everywhere.

Butch, who had witnessed this, started laughing out loud.

Tom looked up at Tyke in disbelief, before his shock turned into anger.

"What the heck is the matter with you, brat?!" Tom said.

"I'm hungry!" Tyke said, unafraid of Tom's angry stare.

"You're…hungry…" Tom repeated in disbelief.

"I WANT FOOD!" Tyke said.

"I don't give a darn. You can starve for all I care" Tom said.

Tyke used his baseball bat to hit Tom between the legs.

Tom spent the next few seconds jumping up and down in pain, while muttering some particularly nasty curses.

"I…want…FOOD!" Tyke said dangerously.

"Alright, alright. I'll fix you something to eat." Tom said reluctantly.

Tom went into the kitchen.

Butch giggled.

"It's funny how Tyke is the only person in this household who can control Tom." Butch said.

"I HEARD THAT!" Tom yelled.

"I WANTED YOU TO HEAR THAT, STUPID!" Butch yelled back.

Then, Jerry walked in the room.

"Alright guys, we've got a busy schedule today. No time for playing around" Jerry said.

"Oh, that's right! Today's the day that we start filming the Tom and Jerry Tales theme song" Butch said.

"Yay. That makes me so excited. I can not begin to express how happy I am to do this." Tom said.

"I'm glad to see that you're enthusiastic about this, Tom. It fits you much better than your usual grumpy mood." Jerry said.

"Do you have an inability to detect sarcasm?" Tom said, while handing Tyke a bowl of cereal.

Butch was giving his pet turtle some food.

"There you go, Stewie." Butch said.

"I said I wanted Froot Loops!" Tyke said to Tom.

"We need to get ready to go to the studio! Come on, people" Jerry said.

"I WANT FROOT LOOPS!" Tyke said.

"Aren't you just the cutest little turtle in all of existence? Yes you are." Butch said.

"Jerry, will you shut up about the studio! Tyke, eat your cereal before I make you. And Butch, can you please stop talking stupid to that stupid turtle!" Tom demanded.

"Hey, watch what you call my turtle! Stewie doesn't need to hear all of that" Butch said.

"It doesn't matter what it hears. It's a stupid turtle and it can't understand any of us anyway!" Tom said.

"All the more reason to watch what you say." Butch said before walking off.

Tom was seething.

"Butch, stop your inane foolishness right now!"

"What are you so mad about? All I'm saying is that…"

And then the living room blew up, and they were covered in a massive explosion.

Tom gave Tyke a peeved look.

"Tyke! What did I tell you about playing with my bombs? They aren't toys!" Tom said.

"Sorry" Tyke said without any look of remorse on his face.

"And where's your fool of a father?" Tom asked.

"I think he's still sleeping." Tyke said.

"Is that so?" Tom said.

Then, Tom walked up the stairs to Spike's room.

He kicked the door down and saw that Spike was sleeping on his bed.

He dragged the sleeping dog out of the room and threw him all the way down the stairs.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!" Spike screamed as he hit the ground.

"It's time for you to wake up, fool." Tom said.

"Ouch. What'd you do that for?" Spike said.

"Don't be a baby. That wasn't even close to painful." Tom said.

"You threw me all the way downstairs!" Spike said.

"Quit your babbling, unless you want me to do worse." Tom said.

"Nope. I'm good." Spike said.

Tom made his way to the kitchen, shoving everyone in his path.

"Man, you're crabby this morning." Jerry said.

"Hn." Tom hummed distractedly while sipping his coffee.

Tyke turned on the TV and began to watch Looney Tunes.

Butch, having nothing better to do, sat down and watched it with him.

When the movie was over, he scowled in anger.

"I hate this movie!" Butch said.

"What, Looney Tunes: Back in Action?" Spike asked.

"Yeah. I hate that movie with every fiber of my being!" Butch said.

"Why do you hate it so much? It seems alright to me. I mean, sure, it's a little cheesy, but it's a kids movie. What did you expect? Blood and gore?" Spike asked.

"Yeah, but that's not the reason I hate it." Butch said.

"Then, why do you hate it?" Spike asked.

"Well, the plot makes absolutely no sense! First of all, why would a multi-million dollar company hire babies to make all their inventions? That's not just dumb, that's a whole new level of stupid! Second, turning people into monkeys won't increase production! It'll just make the production worse! And that ACME chairman is just so annoying. The only reason I kept watching this movie is because I was waiting for someone to come in there and assassinate him!" Butch said.

"The movie's not that bad. It's actually pretty good" Spike said.

"GOOD?!"

"It's a story about courage, bravery, and redemption in an epic struggle against an unstoppable and seemingly undefeatable force in a spellbinding adventure packed with breathtaking drama…!"

"It's a story about two loser characters teaming up with two loser Looney Tunes that have to go up against a loser villain in order to get a loser diamond." Butch interrupted.

"Well, I suppose that summary works too." Spike said.

"Will you fools stop arguing about cartoons and move your butts?" Tom asked.

"Hey, we're having a serious philosophical conversation…!" Butch started.

"About cartoons." Tom finished.

"It's still a philosophical conversation." Butch said.

"Yeah, well get ready to go before I decide to have a philosophical conversation about why I shouldn't dump you in a lava pit" Tom said.

"Alright, alright, let me just…wait, you have a lava pit?"

The room exploded again.

Tom, who was so black that he looked like his brother, turned to Tyke.

"Tyke, I swear if you don't stop messing with my bombs, I will deep-fry you in a vat of lava and fire!" Tom said.

"Isn't that the same threat you used on me? You're being redundant" Butch commented.

"Do you honestly think I care? Tyke! Get your backpack ready for school!" Tom said.

Tyke ran up the stairs. Several seconds later, an explosion could be heard. Then, he ran back downstairs with a backpack on his back.

Tom decided to finish drinking his coffee, while Butch looked at it distastefully.

"Why do you drink that stuff anyways?" he asked.

"It helps me wake up in the mornings" Tom answered, in a better mood than he was in a few moments ago.

"You know, you can do that by going to bed earlier." Butch said, "You don't have to drink coffee all the time. In fact, I'll even help you set up a schedule so you can get more rest at night." Butch said.

"Will you stop sticking your ugly nose into my business? What I choose to do is my business." Tom said.

"Since I'm your brother, it WOULD be my business if you kill yourself." Butch said.

"Please. You're overreacting. I'm not going to die just because I let some caffeine into my system. It's not like your any better" Tom said.

"Guys, can you stop arguing for one minute so we can leave?" Jerry asked.

"Fine. Let's go." Butch said.

XXXXXXX

"We're leaving!" called Tom, slipping on his shoes. "Come on, brat! Grab your backpack and let's go!"

"Weeeeee!" Tyke came shooting down the stairs with a crazed look on his face. This was a common occurrence.

Jerry turned to Butch and said, "Can you take Tyke to school?"

"Why should I take the kid to school?!" Butch asked.

"Because you're not going to be in the theme song so the director won't kill you if you show up late." Jerry said.

"That's right, Jerry. Go ahead and remind me of the fact that I have no part in this. How come SPIKE gets to be in the theme song but not me?!" Butch asked.

"Because I'm better than you and always will be" Spike said with a smug look on his face.

"Jerk…" Butch muttered under his breath.

"Will you slowpokes hurry up so I can get this day over with?" Tom asked.

Tom, Jerry, and Spike got in their car and drove off. Meanwhile, Butch got into a separate car and opened the door for Tyke.

"Alright, kid. Get in." Butch said.

"WHEE!" Tyke said as he jumped into Butch's car.

Then, they drove off.

For a while, the drive was quiet and kind of awkward. It wasn't often that Butch and Tyke were completely alone. Butch wondered how to start a conversion.

"So, how has your day been?" Butch asked.

"Shouldn't you ask me that after school? I haven't even gotten 2 hours into my day yet" Tyke responded.

"Um, are you enjoying school?" Butch asked.

Tyke looked at Butch like he was stupid.

"Of course I don't! What kid does?" Tyke said.

"Right…" Butch said.

Having a decent conversation was going to be harder than it looked.

Eventually, Butch gave up on small talk and just drove silently.

However, neither Butch nor Tyke noticed the evil set of eyes that watched them from the shadows.

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The evil shadowy figure had the Tom and Jerry characters in his sight. They would be carefully watched from the shadows. Oh yes, they would be very essential to his evil plans. He would make his move once the moment was right.

The evil figure laughed very hard. In fact, he laughed so hard that he began to cough uncontrollably.

"HA HA (cough) HA (cough) (cough) HA HA (cough)"

XXXXXXXX

The three toons made their way to the Warner Brothers studio, home of many different cartoon characters, superheroes, and crazy people.

Tom, Jerry, and Spike made their way to Stage #45 which was the Tom and Jerry set.

"I've always wondered," mumbled Spike to himself.

"Always wondered what?" asked Tom.

"How did you and Jerry ever get roped into making cartoons with each other?"

"You want to know this because…?" Tom asked.

"I'm just curious. I mean, you and Jerry are so different and you obviously hate each other. I doubt you two decided to make a cartoon together on your own free will" Spike said.

"You got that right." Jerry said as he glared at Tom.

Tom glared back.

"So, I smell a story in all of this." Spike said.

"My past is none of your concern" Tom said.

"Come on, Tom. Don't be like that. I want to know the story"

"No"

"Please?"

"No"

"Please?"

"No!"

"Please?"

"NO!"

"Please?"

"Alright, alright, I'll tell you the story. Just stop annoying me" Tom said.

"Yay!"

/Flashback/

It was springtime in the grand city of Cartoon City. Since he had nothing better to do, Tom had decided to take a walk.

Tom strolled in the beautiful and peaceful park, scowling at everything he saw.

So basically Tom was scowling at everything, turning the happy atmosphere into a quite depressing one.

Everything that met Tom's gaze got scared away. The birds flew away after seeing Tom's scary gaze. The squirrels ran off. The little children ran back to their mommies.

Yes, everything was as it should be.

Tom enjoyed being able to scare off everything that lived, moved, and breathed.

Almost everything.

In the center of the park was a little mouse that he had never seen before.

The mouse was sitting on a blanket and having a picnic.

Tom scowled at the mouse, but the mouse ignored him. He shot the mouse a scary glare, but it didn't faze him. He put on the scariest glare he could manage, but the mouse wasn't getting scared off.

For some reason, this agitated the gothic cat.

Why wasn't the fool getting scared off?

Tom tried everything he could but the mouse simply ignored him.

He scowled at the brown mouse. He could almost feel the mouse sneer back at him.

His eyes narrowed.

That mouse was going down.

XXXXXXX

"So, how did this lead to you and Jerry making cartoons with each other?" Spike asked.

"I was getting to that, you obnoxious bag of dog-breath." Tom said.

XXXXXXX

In a normal situation, Tom might've left the mouse alone. He didn't know why, but that mouse was getting on his nerves.

Tom just felt this overwhelming desire to get rid of the mouse, but he didn't know why.

It probably had something to do with the fact that he was a cat and cats were naturally born to chase mice.

With that in mind, Tom emptied his pockets and grabbed some weapons.

XXXXXX

"Wait a minute. Why would you keep weapons with you during a stroll in the park?" Spike asked.

"Will you just listen?!" Tom snapped.

XXXXXX

Tom stood before the mouse, grinning wider than the Cheshire Cat. He held his weapons, a rather mean looking chainsaw along with some firearms, high above his head. Then, he charged toward the mouse, guns blazing.

The mouse screamed and ran off, Tom following him.

With a maniacal laugh, Tom began shooting rapidly.

The mouse (Jerry) ran off screaming as Tom fired a flamethrower.

Tom laughed insanely as he blindly threw some grenades at the mouse.

The mouse, in an incredible display of acrobatics, dodged every single weapon.

Meanwhile, some cartoon producers for Turner Entertainment were sitting on a bench. They were trying to think of a new TV show they could create.

They wanted to make a kids cartoon that would be really funny and exciting to watch.

They just didn't know what to make.

So, they looked for inspiration in the world around them. It was then that they saw the strangest thing.

It was a cat who was trying to catch a cute little mouse.

Eventually, Jerry ran towards a tree and Tom, who was holding a cannon, followed him.

Jerry quickly ran into a little hole in the tree, and Tom slammed into the tree bark before he could stop himself.

The cartoon producers were laughing out loud, and before anyone realized it, they had their new cartoon!

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"So, then the producers came up to me and Tom with an offer that we just couldn't refuse. We got a job at Warner Brothers and the rest is history" Jerry said.

Spike looked thoughtful.

"So, basically, the 'Tom and Jerry' franchise was started after some producers saw Tom chasing Jerry in the park? Wow. I kind of thought that there was a bigger story behind the 'Tom and Jerry' cartoon." Spike said, "Still, it's a fascinating story"

"Not really" Tom said.

"That's because you're bitter." Jerry said.

"When am I not?" Tom asked.

"You should at least make an effort to smile every once in a while" Jerry said.

"The only way that would happen is if you threatened me at gunpoint. Even then, it wouldn't be a real smile" Tom said.

"Argh! I don't know why I put up with you! Why can't you be more like your brother? He smiles every time he gets the chance" Jerry said.

"My brother is a psychopath." Tom said.

"And you're not?!" Jerry asked.

"Touché" Tom said.

Then, Tom, Jerry, and Spike made it to Stage #45 and walked in.

XXXXXXX

Butch continued to drive in silence. Eventually, he made it to Tyke's school. Tyke got ready to exit the car.

"Don't blow anything up today," said Butch as Tyke got out of the car.

"Okay" Tyke said as he left the car to greet his best friend, Tuffy 'Nibbles' Mouse.

"Hi Tyke" Nibbles said.

"Hi Nibbles." Tyke said.

Tyke's best friend was Tuffy Mouse, but everyone just called him 'Nibbles' because of his tendency to eat a lot.

He also happened to be Jerry's nephew.

"So, you ready for school?" Nibbles asked.

Tyke glared at him.

"Sorry. Standard question." Nibbles said.

"I don't see why I have to come here. I don't need no school! I learned everything I know from the streets" Tyke said.

"I know. That's what I told my mother. But she said that I have to go to school anyway" Nibbles said.

Butch stayed there until he was sure that Tyke was in the building. That was because of Tyke's tendency to cut class and go somewhere that was away from the school.

Once Tyke and Nibbles were inside, Butch pushed the pedal as hard as he could, and he drove…straight into the back of a school bus.

"(Groan) you have to be kidding me." Butch groaned as he honked his horn.

This was going to be a long day.

XXXXXXX

"Where the heck have you three been?! You're both late!"

"Nice to see you too," said Tom.

"Don't give me any of that! I hope you have an excuse for why you're so late!" screeched the director.

Jerry looked at the clock on the wall.

"According to that clock, we're 30 minutes early" Jerry said.

The director looked nervous before changing the clock's time.

"That clock is 45 minutes slow" the director said.

"But my clock said the same thing as your clock before you changed it. So did the clock on the hallway, as well as the clock in the lobby, and the clock…"

"Look! You're late and that's all that matters! So, unless you want something bad to happen to you, I suggest you get to work!" The director said.

Our favorite cat-and-mouse duo got into place on the set.

"All right! Now, get ready to play your parts! I want genuine work ethic today!" the director said.

And so Tom and Jerry began acting out their scenes in the theme song.

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Lunch hour finally came for Tom, Jerry, and Spike. Butch was also there, although he arrived late due to an incident with a school bus that he refuses to speak about.

"Ugh," said Tom, "I hate this job."

"Will you quit complaining?" Jerry asked, "At least you have a job. A good paying job at that."

"That's the only reason I haven't blown this dump" Tom said.

"Mm-hmm" Jerry mumbled as he ate his cheese sandwich with a side of cheese fries along with cheese juice.

"Okay, I know that mice like cheese but this is pushing it. I mean, come on! Who makes cheese juice?" Spike said.

"Hey, I don't insult you when you suck on bones, bone-sucker" Jerry said.

"What? It's what dogs do. We suck bones" Spike said.

"Am I the only one who thinks that kind of sounded wrong?" Jerry asked.

"What do you mean?" Spike asked.

"Come on, you said that you sucked on bones (If you know what I mean)" Jerry said.

Spike's eyes widened.

"Oh, heck no! I didn't mean it like that!" Spike said.

"You didn't say that you didn't mean it like that." Jerry countered.

"Are you saying that I'm gay?"

"I never said you were gay," Jerry said, "I simply said that what you said sounded wrong"

"Speaking of wrong, have you looked at the Tom and Jerry FanFiction Archive? You won't believe how many stories show you and Tom as a couple" Butch said.

Tom choked on his lemonade. Jerry grew pale.

Tom glared at his brother.

"Well, my appetite has officially been ruined. Thanks a lot, brother" Tom said.

"You are very welcome, Tom." Butch said.

Tom glared at him.

"Oh wait. That was 'sarcasm' again, wasn't it?" Butch said.

"Ugh, me and Tom…" groaned Jerry, "My life would be better if I had not been told that"

Spike decided to change the subject.

"How's about we change the subject to…"

"Wars?" Tom inputted.

"Yes, wa…TOM! We are not talking about wars!" Spike yelled.

"Why not? I like wars" Tom said.

"I think World War 3 was my favorite war" Butch said.

"There was never a World War 3" Spike scoffed.

"What do you mean? We went over this…oh, right, you were chasing Tyke while we were discussing World War 3 (See Chapter 4 for details)" Butch said.

"Well, basically World War 3 went like this…"

XXXXXX

After lunch break was over, the director had them work on the Tom and Jerry Tales theme song. Eventually, the director let them go after they did about a thousand takes for the theme song.

After picking up Tyke, the Tom and Jerry Crew was just hanging out at the Tom and Jerry Mansion.

Tom was on the couch reading the biggest source for misery and depression: the newspaper!

Jerry was eating some X-Treme Nacho Chips. Spike was slobbering for no apparent reason. Tyke was taking a nap, and Butch was nagging his brother.

"I'm bored, Tom," sighed Butch.

Tom didn't care.

"I don't care."

"I'm bored, Tom"

"Shut up. I'm trying to read." Tom said.

"Seriously, we should do something. How about we play War of the Whiskers again (See Chapter 5)?" Butch asked.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't you and Tom get into a big fight that nearly brought the house down the last time you played War of the Whiskers?" Jerry asked while munching on nachos.

"Come on, that only happened once, and it was Tom's fault. He started it" Butch huffed.

"No. YOU started it. Remember?" Tom said.

"But you finished it" Butch said.

"Humph" Tom huffed.

"So, uh, what do we do now?" Jerry asked.

"I don't know. This chapter doesn't really have a plot, does it?" Spike asked.

"Well, it HAS to have a plot. All good stories have plots. This story is just setting itself up for failure without a plot" Butch said.

"Well, the main genre is 'humor' so the plot should be centered on that." Spike said.

"Yeah, except the author doesn't always have a good sense of humor. Sometimes, his sense of humor can run dry." Jerry said.

"Then, he shouldn't have started a fanfic based on 'humor'," Spike said.

"He didn't start a fanfic based on humor alone. He also made 'Family' a subgenre so during the times when he runs out of humor, he can just have a chapter with family bonding. That's it! We should bond with each other in some way" Butch said.

"Ugh. Bond with you guys? I'd rather die" Tom said.

"Yeah, I'm not feeling too good about the whole 'family bonding' thing either." Spike said.

"That's because this family is pretty dysfunctional." Jerry said.

"Does this even qualify as a 'family'," Spike asked.

"Well, you're Tyke's father. Tom and Butch are brothers, and we've been living in the same house for almost 20 years. I guess that's a family" Jerry said.

"I suppose. I can't really imagine living without you guys anyway." Butch said.

"Except for when you get married" Jerry said.

"You mean 'if' he gets married. The poor fool can't catch a girlfriend to save his life" Tom interjected.

"Hey, that is not true! I can too get a girlfriend. Heck, with my looks and charm, I'm practically irresistible to the ladies" Butch said.

"I see. That explains why you're still single" Tom said.

"Shut up! There's just no one I'm interested in at the moment" Butch said.

"What about Tootles?" Tom asked.

Butch's face turned red.

"What about her?!" Butch demanded.

"You like her, don't you?" Tom asked.

"No…n-no, I don't know what you're talking about." Butch stuttered.

"For a TV show actor, you're pretty horrible at acting. I know you like Tootles." Tom said.

"Wait, back up! Tootles? As in the woman who lives across the street from us?" Spike asked.

"Yeah, the same. Butch has had the hugest crush on her for the longest time" Jerry explained.

"I do not. All of you should shut your traps!" Butch said.

"He totally does like her" Tom said.

"Yeah, Tom and I figured it out while we were filming the episode 'Springtime for Thomas' (That's a Tom and Jerry episode in which Tom and Butch are fighting for Tootles' love).

"Really? That's interesting." Spike said.

"Can we get back to the topic at hand?!" Butch asked.

"Um…what was the topic again?" Jerry asked.

"THIS CHAPTER HAS NO PLOT!" Butch screamed.

"Well, it kind of does have a plot when you think about it. Tom, Spike, and I filmed the theme song, while you took Tyke to school. That's kind of a plot" Jerry said.

"What kind of a lame plot is that?! We did nothing exciting. We need to do something really amazing that defies all the laws of physics and contains lots of explosions!" Butch said with a determined look.

"How are we going to do that?" Spike asked.

"I have decided. Guys, we are going on a quest!" Butch said with a determined look on his face.

- end of chapter -

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Uh-oh. Looks like the Tom and Jerry Crew are going on a quest! Will they be able to survive their journey? Will they make it out alive? What does the evil shadowy figure have in store for Tom and Jerry?

So many questions.

But don't worry, they will be answered in the next installment of Insanity!

Please review!