Disclaimer: I don't own Tom and Jerry.
Alright guys! It's the chapter that you have been waiting for! Get ready for 'The Quest'.
Don't forget to read and review!
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Insanity Chapter 7: The Quest Part One
Tom and Jerry never knew what happened. One minute, they were going on a quest, and the next thing they knew, they were tied up over a vat of lava. They didn't even know where Butch and Spike were.
In front of them are the two evil shadowy figures and they had malicious grins on their faces.
"Let us go, you twits" Tom said.
"Sorry, no can do," the first shadowy figure said, "We have big plans for you. And by big plans, I mean dropping you into that lava down there and watching you burn"
"Besides, we wouldn't tie you up in the first place if we were just going to let you go" the second figure said.
"Gah. I'll get you for this" Tom said.
"I can't believe our day turned out so bad," Jerry said, "and to think it started out so well…"
Flashback…
It had been one day since Butch announced his big plans to give this story a plot.
Spike and Tyke, being the adventurous ones, had immediately agreed. Jerry thought it would be interesting and he didn't have anything better to do so he agreed as well.
Tom was the only one against it, but he was outnumbered 4 to 1 so he reluctantly had to go along.
He would've just stayed home but after a torture session that involved flames, boxes, grenades, knives, and chocolate rabbits, he had to come along.
And so, there they were, off on a quest.
Tyke was sitting next to a campfire while singing campfire songs.
Specifically, The Campfire Song Song from SpongeBob SquarePants.
"Let's gather around the campfire and sing our campfire song! Our C.A.M.P.F.I.R.E S.O.N.G song and if you don't think that we can…" Tyke was singing.
"Tyke! Stop singing campfire songs! We're not even at a campfire!" Spike said.
Tyke was in the very backseat of their minivan. He had decided to burn the seat next to him and call it a 'campfire'.
Spike turned around to look at Tyke.
"And furthermore I want you to… (gasp!)…what the halibut are you doing?! Put that fire out!" Spike said.
"Put what out?" Tyke asked.
"The fire!"
"What fire?" Tyke asked.
"The fire that you need to put out!" Spike yelled.
"What do I need to put out?" Tyke asked.
"The FIRE!" Spike yelled.
"Oh, for Pete's sake. Give me that!" Butch said.
Butch tore the burning seat off the ground and threw it out the door. The burning seat had landed on the grass, which started to catch on fire.
"There. Problem solved" Butch said.
"Um, you know that the burning seat is going to make the grass catch on fire which eventually will make the trees catch on fire which would spread and cause a forest fire that would kill off most of the animals in the forest, right?" Jerry asked.
"That ain't my problem. I'll let the Fire Department deal with that. For now, let's focus on our quest" Butch said.
"Yeah, speaking of that, do you even know where we're going?" Jerry asked.
"Of course. We're going on a quest!" Butch said.
"I know that but where are we going?" Jerry asked.
"Um…we could go to McDonalds?" Butch suggested.
"There's a McDonalds 5 minutes from us! How does that count as a 'quest'?" Jerry asked.
"We could go to one that's 4500 miles away" Butch said.
"Why would we travel 4500 miles to go to McDonalds when there's one 5 minutes away?!" Jerry asked.
"Hmm, alright then, how about we look for buried treasure?" Butch said.
"We don't have any treasure maps" Jerry said.
Butch smirked.
"Oh, but I do." Butch said.
"You do? How'd you get it?" Jerry asked suspiciously.
"I got it from President Obama. He and I used to be best buds when we were growing up, and before we got our current jobs, he and I used to be pirates!" Butch said.
Jerry almost exploded.
"Okay, first of all, this fanfic takes place in 2006! Obama didn't become president until what-2008? That's a continuity error! Second of all, you did not become friends with him and YOU WERE NEVER PIRATES!" he shouted.
"Of course he was!" Butch shouted childishly, "He used to come over to my house and we would watch the big game!"
"Bah, he's making this up" Tom said after brooding darkly.
"See? Tom said that you were making this up!" Jerry said.
"Bah. My idiot brother knows nothing. He was always asleep whenever Obama came over" Butch said.
"Obama never came over to our house!" Tom shouted.
"OF COURSE HE DID!" howled Butch, "He would come over and we would venture out into the great unknown and loot towns and plunder villages and fight space aliens!"
"Prove that you know Obama!" Jerry said.
"Prove that I don't!" Butch countered.
"Will you buffoons stop arguing and shut up?!" Tom said.
"What's your problem? Don't just snap at me for no reason. I did nothing to make you mad at me." Butch said.
"It's your fault I'm even traveling with you on your stupid 'quest'," Tom said.
"So? I had no ill intentions towards you. I was trying to help you. You needed to get out more, anyway. All you do all day is fester inside that house like a disease" Butch said.
"What's wrong with that? If I want to mope then I'll mope." Tom said.
"At least be less of a jerk than you usually are. This is a day to have fun!" Butch said.
Tom raised an eyebrow.
"Going on your fantasy adventures where you face preposterous nightmare creatures and certain death around every corner is considered more fun than lying around in our secure and cozy mansion?"
"You know what I mean!" Butch said.
"No I don't"
There was silence for a moment.
"Tyke's being unusually quiet" Butch said.
"If we're lucky, maybe he fell out of the car and injured himself" Tom said.
"You're incredibly cruel, you know that?" Butch said.
"I try" Tom said.
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Meanwhile, a shadowy figure watched the mini-van that Tom and Jerry were in. It was almost time for the trap.
And then, the shadowy figure and his partner would finally have their revenge on Tom and Jerry!
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"Bah, I am really hating today" Tom said.
"You hate every day" Spike said.
"I hate today even more" Tom said.
"Come on, Tom. Stop being so dark and miserable. If you do that then maybe you'll actually enjoy yourself" Jerry said.
"Go jump off a cliff" Tom said.
"Butch, help me out with this. Tell your gothic brother that he can have fun if he just lets himself." Jerry said.
"That's what I've been trying to tell him. But he never listens. He usually just says mean things…" Butch said.
"Go burn yourself" Tom said.
"…and he totally blows me off." Butch finished.
"Yeah Tom, you're totally cramping our style!" Spike said.
"Tom, maybe you should have fun once in a while"
"Yeah, just stop moping and enjoy yourself."
"Be happy for once, Tom"
"Tom, maybe you should…"
"ENOUGH! You maggots have succeeded in dragging me with you on this stupid quest, so can you please leave me alone before I change my mind?!" Tom yelled.
There was silence for a moment.
After a while, it was quiet until the silence was broken.
"I WANT A UNICORN!" Tyke yelled.
More silence.
"…What?!" Tom said.
"I want a unicorn!" Tyke yelled.
"As funny as it would be to see you get killed by a unicorn, you're not getting one" Tom said.
"Do unicorns even exist?" Jerry asked.
"Of course they don't!" said Spike.
"Sure they do!" Butch said.
"Wait…what?" Spike said.
"Of course unicorns exist! Are you stupid?" Butch said.
"Butch, are you on something?" Spike asked.
"No, I'm not on something! I'm telling you unicorns are real! Oh sure, people think that unicorns are just a myth, but that's what they said about peanut butter and jelly sandwiches! They thought that peanut butter and jelly sandwiches were just an urban legend that didn't exist. But look at us now! We eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches all the time! So, of course unicorns exist!" Butch said.
There was more silence.
"Butch, I loathe being your sibling" Tom said.
"And I loathe being yours" Butch responded.
The car continued to drive.
Tom narrowed his eyes in suspicion.
"Why do I get the feeling that we are all going to die in the next few seconds?" Tom asked.
Before anyone could respond, a small mini-missile impacted their car and exploded. Everyone in the car was blasted to unconsciousness.
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The blast wasn't very large and was only powerful enough to knock them unconscious with only a few minor burns. Tyke was blasted into a different location but Tom, Jerry, Butch, and Spike were in the same location.
Two shadowy figures walked out from the bushes. One of them was holding a bazooka.
The first shadowy figure was tall and skinny while the second figure was shorter and plumper.
"Looks like we got them. What should we do now?" the shorter one said.
"All I care about is Tom and Jerry. I don't care what happens to other two. Let's load Tom and Jerry into the truck and get out of here" the first figure answered.
"Gotcha" the shorter one said.
The two figures picked up Tom and Jerry (Jerry was easy to carry since he was so small) and dropped them into their trunk.
They got in their car and drove off.
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A half-hour later, Butch opened his eyes as he regained consciousness.
"Ugh, my head hurts. I feel like someone hit me with a bazooka" Butch groaned as he looked around.
He immediately spotted a big gray dog that was unconscious.
"Hey, Spike. Wake up!" Butch said.
Spike groaned before he opened his eyes.
"Ugh…Butch? What happened?" Spike said.'
"I'm not sure. Something hit us and we were blasted out of our car" Butch said.
"Well, that sucks. Maybe we should've gone to McDonalds" Spike said.
"Hey, shut up!" Butch said as he helped the dog get to his feet.
Spike looked around.
"So, where are Tom and Jerry?" he asked.
"I don't know. I looked around here but I don't see them. And our car got destroyed so it's not going to be easy to look for them out here in the wilderness where we could get hurt, killed, or eaten."
Spike looked around and gulped.
They really were in the wilderness, alone and exposed to any wild carnivorous animal.
This was definitely scary.
He turned to find Tyke, so he could give him comfort but quickly found that he couldn't find him.
"Uh, Butch, where's Tyke?" Spike asked with a worried expression.
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Tyke didn't know where he was, and he really didn't care. The explosion from earlier had barely even fazed him and although most 6-year-old kids would be shivering in fright by now, Tyke was sitting in the grass playing Super Mario Bros. on his Nintendo DS as if he was still at home.
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Our favorite gray cat opened his eyes.
"Ugh…what the heck?" Tom groaned as he looked around.
He looked around and found that he was in a lair of some sort.
He could tell that it was an evil villains' lair because of the aura that it radiated. Or maybe it was because there was a sign above him that said 'This is an evil villains' lair'.
Whatever.
Tom silently cursed as he looked around. Those jerks. They dare kidnap Tom Cat?! He'll make them pay!
He began to walk around before he came upon a familiar brown mouse that was unconscious.
Tom sighed.
"Of course I would get stuck with this loser…" he groaned.
He shook Jerry's body.
"Wake up, you twit" Tom said.
Jerry groaned but he didn't wake up. Tom, being quite upset and rather cranky, wasn't about to let his cartoon co-star attain a greater span of beauty sleep.
"I SAID WAKE UP!" Tom said as he stomped his foot on Jerry's body, causing him to wake up screaming in pain.
"Tom! Do you think you can stomp on me again?! I think there are some ribs that you haven't cracked yet!" Jerry said.
"Bah. Your ribs will mend. In the meantime, I suggest you take a look around" Tom said.
Jerry looked around and his anger faded as he took in his surroundings.
"Wait, where are we?" he asked.
"Does it look like I know the answer to that question?" Tom said.
"Well, you don't have to be so mean about it…" Jerry said.
"Sorry. I'm just having a little trouble coping with the fact that we've been attacked, kidnapped, and dragged here where we're probably going to get tortured and violently killed; so excuse me for being angry!" Tom yelled.
"Well, do you know where Butch and Spike are?" Jerry asked.
Tom shrugged.
"Who knows? They're probably dead or something" he said.
Jerry stared at him.
"What?" Tom groaned.
"You say that as if you don't care if they die or not" Jerry said.
"Of course I care (surprisingly), but I care too much about survival to care about them right now. Even though we're probably going to die in the first place" Tom said.
"You're such a heartless jerk, you know that?"
"According to you."
"You're being of no help."
"Neither are you as far as I can see it."
Suddenly the door opened and the two villains came out.
"Aha, so the fools are finally awake."
"FOOLS?!" Jerry yelled.
Tom ignored Jerry's outburst and addressed the villains.
"Who the heck are you?" Tom asked.
"You can call us…Tom and Jerry" the villains said.
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Butch and Spike walked through the forest. Spike was on edge. There were a lot of animals here, and some of them were dangerous. He already narrowly escaped the clutches of a hungry panther, and he could've sworn that he saw a lion nearby.
Butch also saw the animals and he was currently singing a song about them.
"Animals. Animals. They go round and round. Animals. Animals. They make lots of sound! Animals, animals…!"
"Will you stop singing?!" Spike yelled.
"Why? I'm just trying to lighten the mood" Butch said.
"Well don't! You're just annoying!" Spike said.
Butch pouted.
"What's your problem?" he asked.
"Oh, nothing. Just that we're about to die." Spike said dramatically.
"You need to lighten up. Nothing is going to happen to us. We're perfectly fine." Butch said with a calm voice.
"'Perfectly fine'! Our car got destroyed in an explosion, we nearly died, we don't know where Tom and Jerry are, Tyke is missing, and we're in a forest with a horde of wild animals that won't hesitate to eat us if they get hungry! Does any of that register at all in your feeble brain?!" Spike yelled.
"Chill out, homie. We need to look at the bright side!" Butch said.
"What bright side?!" Spike yelled.
"I'm not sure. In any case, we can't lose hope! We must remember the reason why we are fighting!" Butch said.
"We're not fighting anybody!" Spike said.
"What do you mean? Of course we are. Do you not see the army that we are fighting?" Butch said.
"I don't see any army!" Spike said.
"Unless, it doesn't want you to see the army…" Butch said.
"What do you mean 'it'?" Spike asked.
"You know the thing?" Butch asked.
"What thing?" Spike asked.
"You know. The thing that does the thing with the thing" Butch said.
"I don't know what you're talking about"
"Unless, it doesn't want you to know what I'm talking about…" Butch said.
Spike groaned.
"Now I can see why Tom loathes having you as a sibling" Spike said.
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Tyke was getting bored. And hungry. Where was his father? He had not seen him in a while. Come to think of it, he hadn't seen Butch, Tom, or Jerry either.
He lay back on the grass, and looked at the sky, counting the clouds as they floated along.
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Tom and Jerry looked at each other, and doubled over laughing like fools.
The two figures looked at them and the first one said, "What's so funny?"
They continued to laugh.
"First, you attack us, then you kidnap us and drag us to your lair, and now you want to steal our identities? That's just sad," gasped Tom between fits.
"Yeah, we're the only Tom and Jerry around here" Jerry said in between laughs.
"Well, actually…" the figure said.
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Jerry laughed.
"Um…"
"Make it stop!" laughed Tom, clutching at his stomach.
"Er…"
"Hey, Tom and Jerry! Guess who we are! We're Tom and Jerry!" Jerry mocked making Tom laugh harder.
Our favorite cat-and-mouse duo spent the next few minutes laughing their butts off.
Tom was the first one to settle down.
"Darn. So that's what it feels like to laugh. It kind of hurts…" Tom said as he clutched his sides.
"You…would…think that" Jerry said in between gasps.
"Are you quite finished?" asked the Pseudo-Tom.
"Yeah"
"Pretty much"
"Good. In that case, I believe that you are now our prisoners." the Pseudo-Jerry said as they pointed their guns at Tom and Jerry's faces.
"Jerk…" Jerry muttered.
"Now, I believe this is the part of the story where we reveal our evil plot" said the figure that claimed to be 'Tom'.
"What if we don't want to hear your evil plot?" Jerry asked.
"Then, we'll just kill you and get it over with" answered Pseudo-Jerry.
"Never mind. Lets hear your evil plot" Jerry said.
"Right. Anyway, our evil plot is simple. Me and Jerry, the REAL Jerry, will kill you fakers. Then, once you die, our TV show will be put back on the air and we'll be famous again!" said the man claiming to be 'Tom'.
"Your TV show? What are you talking about?" Jerry asked.
"Wait a minute…I thought you guys looked familiar. You wouldn't happen to be…the original Tom and Jerry?" Tom asked.
"Original Tom and Jerry? What do you mean 'original' Tom and Jerry? I thought that we were the ONLY Tom and Jerry" Jerry said.
Tom shook his head.
"Do you remember the time between the 1930's and the 1960's when cartoons were still in black and white?" Tom asked.
"Well, yeah" Jerry said.
"Well, before our show came along, there was another show that was also called 'Tom and Jerry'. The stars of the show were two humans who had the same name as us and they went on many adventures and quests and stuff" Tom said.
"So, what happened to the stars of the show?" Jerry asked.
"We're looking at them" Tom said.
"You mean- Oh, man. Good grief, we've been kidnapped by has-been cartoon stars?!" Jerry asked.
"Hey! We resent the insult!"
"It appears that we have been kidnapped by has-beens. Embarrassing, isn't it?" Tom said.
"We are not has-beens! We were famous" Original-Tom said.
"Which explains why your show was canceled" Tom said.
"It was all your fault! But we'll get our show back!" said Original-Tom.
"Let me guess, you intend to get rid of our show and find a way to get your own show back on the air?" Tom asked.
"Precisely" Original-Jerry said.
"That's not going to happen." Tom said.
"Yes, it will! Your show is awful and anyone who it appeals to doesn't deserve to live on the Earth as well as the rest of the human race!" Original-Jerry said.
"That's true" Tom said.
"Tom!" Jerry scolded.
"If your show is taken off the air, then that will just be one less bad cartoon to worry about" Original-Tom said.
"That's also true. I like the way you guys think" Tom said in approval.
"TOM!" Jerry said, upset that Tom was siding with the bad guys.
"Of course, in order to get your show off the air, we will have to kill you" Original-Jerry said.
"That's where I draw the line!" Tom shouted.
"Well, you sure can't do anything about it since you're tied up and dangling over lava" Original-Tom said.
"But we're not tied up, and we're not dangling over lava" Jerry said.
The Original Tom and Jerry threw a rope around them and tied them up over a lava pit.
"You are now!" Original-Jerry said.
Tom and Jerry struggled as they dangled over a lava pit. The Original Tom and Jerry chuckled as they watched the Modern Tom and Jerry struggle.
"Let us go, you twits" Tom said.
"Sorry, no can do," Original-Jerry said, "We have big plans for you. And by big plans, I mean dropping you into that lava down there and watching you burn"
"Besides, we wouldn't tie you up in the first place if we were just going to let you go" Original-Tom said.
"Gah. I'll get you for this" Tom said.
"I can't believe our day turned out so bad," Jerry said, "and to think it started out so well…"
"Now I'm feeling déjà vu." Tom said.
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A wild animal was walking through the forest. It was hungry and it had not eaten all day.
It was searching for food now.
Suddenly, the animal heard a noise and it turned to see a small dog on the grass. The animal's eyes narrowed at the sight of Tyke rolling around in the grass.
He had just found his next meal.
- to be continued -
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Alright. So basically, Tom and Jerry are about to be dipped in lava, Butch and Spike are lost in a forest, and it looks like Tyke is about to get eaten.
Will the Tom and Jerry Crew survive?
Find out in the next chapter of Insanity!
Next Up: The Quest Part Two
PS: I didn't make up the Original Tom and Jerry. I was watching some really old cartoons on a DVD collection and I found some very old Tom and Jerry cartoons that dated back to when cartoons were still black and white.
If you don't know what I'm talking about then try looking up these episodes on YouTube or somewhere where you can watch old cartoons:
Tom and Jerry (original) episodes:
A Fireman's Life
A Swiss Trick
Rocketeers
In the Bag
Pots and Pans