I'm sorry for the delay!
Anyway, one of my friends complained that Tom's comment about eating his brothers' hearts was too graphic for kids under the age of 12. I'll tell you guys the same thing I told my friend.
This fanfic is rated K+. Not K. That means it's rated for everyone 10 and up. It's basically rated PG and in some cases, it's close to PG-13.
Besides, I got the idea from the Sonic: Lost World videogame, where Dr. Eggman said that he was going to eat the hearts of his enemies. If Eggman is allowed to say that in a videogame rated E +10 (Everyone 10 and up) then surely Tom can say something similar in a K+ rated story.
At least I'm staying honest to my ratings.
I've seen K rated fanfics where the characters were cussing like sailors.
Now it's time for some festive Tom and Jerry!
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Insanity Chapter 14: Family Reunion Part 4
Ariel held the recipe book open with one hand while the other stirred the dough. She was in the kitchen of the Cats' Farmhouse and she was making the cookies for dessert. She already had some cookies made, but apparently someone had eaten them all up. Now she had to make more cookies.
If only she could find out who ate the original batch of cookies in the first place. Ariel nodded to her cousin Garfield, the orange cat, who was also in the kitchen.
Funny, why did Garfield have cookie crumbs around his mouth?
Then again, maybe that question is better left unanswered.
Sugar, butter and eggs blended with flour and chocolate chips as Ariel rechecked the recipe. She took out a wooden spoon and began to stir. Garfield hopped in the chair by a table where the dog Odie was sitting.
"I am so hot. It's like I'm on fire. I'm so hot that I could melt any second" Garfield whined.
"It's not even all that hot in here. What are you talking about?" Ariel asked.
"I wasn't talking about the heat! I was talking about how handsome I look." Garfield said.
"Oh." Ariel rolled her eyes as she added the baking soda.
Just when she was looking in the refrigerator for the eggs, the oven started to smoke.
"Oh no! The turkey!" Ariel said as she ran to the oven and opened it. She took the turkey out and the turkey was as black as the darkest area of blackness (no, that is not a racist comment).
She threw her hands in the air in frustration. Of course, since she was holding the eggs in her hands, they flew up into the air and hit the ceiling before falling on the ground. The eggs were ruined.
"This reminds me of Jon's last thanksgiving" Garfield said to himself in a thought bubble.
"Crud! I needed those eggs!" Ariel said as she tried to search for more eggs.
Meanwhile, Odie jumped off the table and ran off with drool dripping from his mouth. Garfield just watched him with half lidded eyes.
Ariel found some eggs and was about to put them in, but she slipped on Odie's drool. She fell on the bowl of cookie dough and the dough was splashed in her face. The eggs fell to the ground and were ruined.
"Yep. Just like Jon's last Thanksgiving." Garfield said.
Ariel was ready to scream.
"Great! What else can go wrong?!" she said.
"TOOOOOOM!" Meathead said.
They could hear the cruel laughs of their gothic relative as he had just put honey in Meathead's seat.
Meathead grabbed his tail and tried to wring the sticky honey out of it. Instead, it only made the honey sink in deeper. Tom was on the floor and was laughing his eyes out.
"I'm gonna get you for this!" Meathead said.
"You deserved it, you half-witted toad!" Tom said.
Ariel sighed.
"And here I thought this family reunion was going to be dull." Garfield said.
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Meathead could feel the honey stick to his bottom. Tom was on the ground laughing. Butch was chuckling at Meathead's fate.
"I have to hand it to Tom. Putting honey in Meathead's chair before he sat in it was a pretty good idea." Butch said.
"Whose side are you on?" Meathead asked.
Butch ignored him as he started to laugh.
"I mean, it was just so funny when he sat down on that honey. You didn't see that coming, did you Meathead?" Butch asked.
Lightning was sneaking up behind Tom with a bottle of toothpaste. When he was right behind him, Lightning squeezed the bottle and the toothpaste came squirting out.
With super fast reflexes, Tom dodged the pink toothpaste and the paste landed on Butch's body. Butch screamed as he now had pink polka dots on his fur.
"No, and I didn't see that coming either…" Meathead said.
Tom stared at the pink spots on Butch's body in shock… for all of 2 seconds.
Then he burst out laughing.
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Tom fell to the floor.
Butch's eyes were twitching dangerously. He stared at Lightning with hatred in his eyes. Lightning winced.
"Just so you know, I was aiming at Tom…" he said.
Butch said nothing as he inched closer to Lightning while cracking his knuckles.
"Um… I-think-I-hear-Mom-calling-me-goodbye!" Lightning said in a fast tone as he dashed away from Butch.
"You're a dead man, Lightning!" Butch said as he chased after him.
"AAH! Someone help me! I'm being chased by a maniac!" Lightning screamed.
Butch chased Lightning all throughout the house.
Meanwhile, Spike had finished driving Tyke to the hospital. Spike took Tyke out of the backseat as he ran to the hospital and Tuffy followed him. Spike barged into the hospital as if he was carrying a dying man.
"WE NEED HELP OVER HERE!" Spike said.
Droopy, one of the doctors, heard the commotion and walked up to them.
"What's the trouble? Are you dying?" Droopy asked.
"No." Spike said.
"Are you hurt?" Droopy asked.
"No." Spike said.
"Are you pregnant?" Droopy asked.
"What? What kind of question is that?" Spike asked.
"I don't know. I just thought that you might be in labor or something." Droopy shrugged.
"Do I look like a woman in labor to you?! I'm not even female!" Spike said.
"Then what's the problem?" Droopy asked.
"It's Tyke. He's sick and he needs medical attention!" Spike said.
"Ok then. Follow me to the hospital room and we'll take a look at your daughter." Droopy said.
"He's a boy." Spike said.
"Are you sure? He looks really feminine." Droopy said.
"Just go!" Spike said as he pushed Droopy.
Tuffy didn't say anything as he was worried for his best friend.
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Meathead slowly tip-toed as he walked toward Tom. The badly tempered goth cat was on the couch as he watched the television and drank his tea. He giggled to himself as he fingered the stick he had in his hand.
The prank he had in mind wasn't a very good prank. In fact, it wasn't a prank at all. He just wanted to get payback for Tom putting honey in his seat. And there's no better payback than by whacking Tom across the head with a stick.
Meanwhile, Butch had his own plan ready and prepared. He was going to get Lightning back for making his fur pink!
When Meathead was behind Tom, he pulled the stick back and…
"Hit me with that stick and you're a dead man, Meathead" Tom said without even turning around.
"H-h-how? I was perfectly quiet! Are you psychic or something?" Meathead asked in wonder.
"No. You're reflection is in the window." Tom said.
Meathead looked up and indeed, he could see his and Tom's reflections in the window glass.
"Oh" Meathead said.
Meathead threw the stick at Tom and ran for his life. Tom threw the tea cup down and ran after him. Meathead screamed as he ran into the hallway. He looked for a room to hide in. He jumped in the bathroom as Tom came walking down the hallway.
"Where are you?" Tom wondered as he looked for his prey as if he was a creepy monster in a horror movie looking for its next victim.
He looked at Meathead's bedroom door and heard a noise inside. He opened the door.
"Wait! Tom! DON'T!" Butch jumped out and said but it was too late.
Tom's fate was sealed as he opened the door and an anvil that was on top of the door came falling down on his head.
BAM!
Tom groaned as he held his head. He could feel a large bump rising up.
"Um, oops?" Butch said as Tom looked at him with a murderous look in his eyes.
"I hope you know that I hate you with every bone in my body!" Tom said.
"Sorry! That prank was meant for Lightning!" Butch said.
"Then why did you put it in Meathead's bedroom?" Tom asked.
"Oh, I did? I hadn't noticed." Butch said, genuinely surprised.
Ariel walked down the hallway just in time to hear Tom's scream.
"I'm going to kill you, Butch!" Tom screamed.
"Just keep walking, Ariel. Ignore them… and keep walking." she said to herself.
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Jerry stood before Tom's mother with a nervous expression. He tried to explain that the Triplets had attacked him, but she didn't believe it. Then, Jack opened the basement door and threw a stick of dynamite at Jerry, who got out of the way.
He realized too late that his mother was in the room and the explosive exploded in her face. The mother screamed about having bombs in the house and began to chase him. Zack and Black got mad at Jerry and began to chase him. Jack joined in the chase and the mother chased them as they ran out of the room.
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Butch now had a new way to get revenge against Lightning for making his fur pink. Currently, Lightning was jogging on the track outside of the house. When he came back inside, he would surely need a drink.
He would come inside for a bottle of water. Only, instead of water, he would be drinking mud.
Butch cackled maniacally as he poured mud into the water bottle. Now, all he needed to do was wait.
Butch sneaked out the room and waited for Lightning to come back inside. Unknown to him, Meathead had walked in the kitchen and was very thirsty.
"I… need… a drink." Meathead said.
He saw Lightning's water bottle and grabbed it and drank the precious water from the bottle. But it wasn't water. It was mud.
"BLAH! Who put mud in the water bottle?!" Meathead asked angrily.
He looked at the name that was on the water bottle.
"Wait a minute… this is Lightning's water bottle! He did this! LIGHTNING!" Meathead said as he walked out the kitchen.
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Droopy was examining Tyke in his hospital room. Spike and Nibbles were watching.
"Well, doc? Is Tyke going to be okay?" Spike asked.
"Well, he is sick. But he'll be okay soon." Droopy said.
"That's good." Spike said, relieved.
"I still can't believe that chili dog made him sick." Tuffy said.
"But it didn't. His sickness isn't the cause of anything he's been eating recently." Droopy said.
"It's not?!" Spike asked.
"But… the stomach aches… and the vomiting…" Tuffy started.
"Were caused by a stomach virus that Tyke seems to have caught. I'm afraid that Tyke has picked up a stomach virus that has been going around recently and it's causing her to throw up." Droopy said.
"Hey! Did you just call Tyke a 'her'?" Spike asked.
"No. I said 'him'" Droopy said.
"Did not."
"Did too"
"Did not."
"Did too"
"The important thing is: he's going to be okay. Right?" Tuffy asked.
"Yes, so long as he takes this medicine for his stomach, he'll be a-okay." Droopy said.
Spike and Tuffy were relieved to hear this.
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Lightning was finished with his jog as he walked back to the house. He opened the door and greeted his family.
"What's up, guys? I-"
A pie suddenly slammed into his face. It slowly slid down to the ground as Lightning touched his face and saw lemon cream pie filling on his finger.
"What is the meaning of this?!" Lightning asked.
"That's for squirting all this pink stuff on me!" Butch said as he pointed to his stains.
"I already told you! I meant to hit Tom!" Lightning said.
"Don't forget about the mud you put in my drink!" Meathead said.
"What are you talking about? I never did that!" Lightning said.
"Then why was the mud in your cup?!" Meathead angrily asked.
"Wait. I did that! That prank was meant for Lightning!" Butch said.
Meathead turned to him.
"You mean you're responsible for the mud in my mouth?!" he asked.
"It was meant for Lightning! All my pranks were meant for Lightning!" Butch said.
"If that was the truth then why does my head hurt like heck right now?" Tom asked with narrowed eyes.
"It was meant for Lightning!" Butch said.
"Look what you did to my face!" Lightning said.
"And you're responsible for the honey sticking to my bottom!" Meathead said as he pointed to Tom.
"That was just a harmless little joke! If you couldn't take it then you shouldn't have dropped me down that trap door!" Tom said.
"What about my fur? It's pink!" Butch said.
"Oh, get over it, snot-rag! What are you, twelve? You're not the one who has an aching head right now!" Tom said.
The four brothers stared at each other in silence.
Lightning was trying to wipe the lemon cream pie off his face. Meathead had honey on his tailed backside, he also still had the taste of mud in his mouth. Butch looked at the pink poke-a-dots that was dyed into his black body fur, and Tom glanced at the bump that was on his head.
Each of these were the results of a long and brutal prank war.
The four brothers glared and growled at each other with deep loathing.
"You are SO DEAD!" they all yelled at the same time as they jumped at one another. They started fighting by wrestling each other down on the floor, where they began punching, kicking and biting as they piled up on top of one another as well as hitting and smacking each other by using their tails like whips, they were also beginning to rip the carpet with their claws while grunting and hissing.
They were now starting to brake and smash random objects by crashing and slamming into things like flower glass vases and the television set with their tailed backside furry bodies as they turned, twisted, held and rubbed their fur against one another, by moving around in a circle.
Meanwhile, Jerry was still running away from the triplets who were being chased by Tom's mother, who despite her older age, could still run very fast.
Ariel was shaking her head as she watched this display of savagery, while some of their cousins were making bets on which one would win the fight between the four brothers.
The four brothers were scratching each other like wild mad cats, punching and screaming as they fought their way out of one room and into another one. They were throwing each other into random windows or walls and putting large and/or small body sized holes as well as body slamming one another. They were at their worst!
Their body fur now had a real dirty, stinky wet matted and ruffled look to it as they sharpened their claws by scratching each other even more as they destroyed the rest of the house along with them.
"I'll crush you like bugs under my foot!" Meathead said.
"I'll rip you apart!" Lightning said.
"I'll tear you to pieces!" Butch said.
"I'll rip out your lungs and carve out your eyes! I'll rend your flesh and burn your remains as I tear out your hearts and eat them!" Tom said.
The three brothers stopped and looked at their brother Tom, while paling at the vivid imagery, "Tom. Are you aware that kids are reading this?" Lightning asked.
"Yeah. Why?" Tom said. While Butch and Meathead were just staring at each other in total shock.
"No reason. Just checking."
Meathead then turned to Lightning and punched him in the face. Tom and
Butch locked their clawed hands together in a test of strength like contest. Both of these were the signal for the fight to continue between the four brothers.
And fight they did!
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Now that Spike knew that Tyke would be okay, he was able to drive home in peace. Once they entered the mansion, Tyke seemed to be back to his normal self. Tyke ran and screamed like a mad-puppy as he ran upstairs with Tuffy in pursuit.
Tyke would still have to take medicine, but as far as Spike was concerned, everything was A-okay.
Spike lied down on the couch and turned on the television. Surprisingly, it was a Tom and Jerry cartoon that was on, and Spike watched as Tom and Jerry got up to their usual antics in the episode.
It was funny how Tom and Jerry seemed so different in the television than in real life. Jerry seemed smarter and less timid and more athletic in the cartoon, while Tom was clumsier, happier, and nicer (Tom is still a jerk in the cartoon, but compared to the Tom in this fanfic, the cartoon-Tom is the paragon of happiness and love).
Spike continued to watch the television and he laughed at some of the jokes. These cartoons that they made really were funny. It almost made it worth it to come to the studio and listen to the Director yell at them all day.
Speaking of yelling, from the sound of it, Tyke was almost completely back to normal. Funny, it only took less than 2 hours for Tyke to heal from the effects of that virus. It takes most kids longer than that to heal from a sickness like that.
Then again, Tyke's immune system had always seemed to be ten times stronger than the average immune system.
"I WANT MORE CHILI DOGS!" Tyke said.
Spike chuckled.
"That's my boy" Spike said.
Once the cartoon was over, Spike walked to the bookshelf and looked at the selection of books.
"Let's see if there are any good books here." Spike said as he looked at the titles.
'A History of Gothic Artifacts'
This was undoubtedly Tom's book.
Spike looked at another title.
'How to Get Taller in Less than 2000 days'
The only one who would be interested in that was Jerry as he was the shortest one.
'The Dummies Guide to Wooing a Pretty Girl… for Dummies'
Butch.
'The Adventures of Captain Potato-Head'
No doubt, this is Tyke's book.
'The Book of Pretty Pink Unicorns and Sugar Fairies'
Spike didn't want to know how that book got there.
Randomly deciding on the 'History of Gothic Artifacts' book, Spike sat on the couch and read.
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Ariel was looking on in horror as her four brothers were fighting in the playroom as if they were acting out scenes from King Kong vs. Godzilla. The toys that were meant to be used by Jack, Black, and Zack were now being used as weapons. The death threats were uncountable as the cats fought attacked each other.
Their screams were so loud that they could be heard from outside the house and the un-pleasantries were even worse.
"I'll knock you into next year!" Lightning said as he grabbed a dollhouse and slammed it on Meathead's head.
"I'll break off your arms and legs!" said Butch.
"I'll tear out your spines!" shouted Tom.
With each passing minute, their threats got more and more violent until eventually, they had to be censored by the author.
"I'll (beep) your (beep) and shove them down your (beep) until you (beep)!" Tom shouted as he used a Barbie doll as a club.
"Your (beep) will be (beep) when I (beep) your (beep) into the (beep) and (beep)!"
And so the threats continued.
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Spike yawned as he took a nap. Tyke had begged him to make him some chili dogs, and since the only chili dogs they had were the rancid 3 year old ones in the refrigerator (someone should clean that refrigerator out eventually), he had to travel to the store and get some fresh chili and some hot dogs and cook them himself. Afterwards, Tyke and Tuffy went outside to play tag and Spike figured that he might as well take a nap.
Spike yawned as he stretched out from under his blanket.
This was the most peaceful day that he had had in the last 2 years. Ever since Spike had moved in with Tom and Jerry (Butch didn't move there until 3 months later), his life had been filled with chaos, explosions, acting, gun fire, fighting, screaming, yelling, bullet dodging, rocket launching, racing, running for his life, monsters, aliens, teaming up with superheroes, evil Christmas idols, chasing, evil robots that were disguised as his son, sugar, food fights, bad tacos, rancid chili dogs, quests, hungry lions, evil doppelgangers, zombie ninjas, out-of-control school buses and more.
The idea of going through one day without any of that stuff made him feel as if he was in Heaven.
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Ariel felt as if she was in Hades as she looked at the mostly wrecked house. They were now in the kitchen and the four brothers were staring daggers at each other. The kitchen was a mess. The only thing that wasn't utterly destroyed was the turkey.
Meathead grabbed the turkey and began to use it as a club, but then Tom grabbed the turkey. The others grabbed it and the scuffle evolved into a full blown tug-of-war.
The brothers threw insults at each other as they pulled.
"Lard face!"
"Garbage breath!"
"Scum sucker!"
"Weasel mouth!"
They kept going until the turkey was ripped to shreds.
And they kept fighting.
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Jerry had finally lost the Triplets and the angry mother. With a relieved sigh, he walked back inside, only to find that the house was utterly ruined.
Jerry sighed.
"Do I want to know?" he wondered.
He heard an explosion.
"No. I definitely do not." Jerry said as he walked outside.
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Spike had woken from his nap and was now playing with Nibbles and Tyke on the Game Cube.
It was Pikachu vs. Link vs. Mario on the Super Smash Bros Melee game. Afterwards, they played Tom and Jerry: War of the Whiskers where they played as themselves.
Later, they went outside and played tennis with Spike being the referee.
Spike sighed in content.
"I hope this day never ends." he said.
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"Please let this day end." Ariel and Jerry both had their hands over their eyes as the brothers took their fight to the backyard where they began to wrestle.
"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" the brothers shouted at each other.
On the sidewalk, some people were walking when they turned to the wrestling match that the brothers were having. They began to walk just a little faster.
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Spike, Tyke, and Tuffy were eating dinner.
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The brothers were on the ground and they were out of breath. They had fought each other for the last hour and they needed a breather.
Meathead got up.
"I don't know about you but all that fighting has made me hungry." he said.
Lightning got up and rubbed his stomach.
"Ouch. Your kick is stronger than I remember it, Tom."
"I act in a cartoon where I run all the time. Of course my legs are strong." Tom said flippantly before he winced.
"That right hook of yours is what got me." Tom said as he held his head.
They each began to attend to their injuries.
Jerry walked up to them.
"Is it over?" he asked.
Butch looked at Jerry and then at his dress.
"Uh… do I want to know what you were up to while we were fighting?" he asked.
"It isn't like that! This dress was forced on me!"
"Now I REALLY don't want to know." Butch said as he walked to the house.
Jerry took his dress off and left it in the dirt as he ran to the house.
Lightning sat at the table.
"I guess this is the part where we sit down and eat! Where's the food?" he asked.
"Why don't you ask the walls and the floor and the ceiling?" Ariel asked.
The four brothers looked at the walls and the floor and saw that there was food on the ground. The turkey was in shreds, and the rest of the meal was splattered on the walls and floor.
"Oh" they said in unison.
"So, there's nothing to eat?" Jerry asked.
"Nope. Not a thing! UGH! You guys just had to ruin the whole reunion with your fight! This whole day has been ruined!" Ariel said as she sat down.
"Don't be like that, Ariel. I thought the day was great. And who cares about the food anyway? At least we have each other. And at least we were able to spend time together." Butch said.
"That's the sappiest thing I have ever heard." Tom said.
"Shut up, Tom! You're not helping." Butch said.
"So, what do we eat?" Jerry asked.
"You know what? Eating a big home-cooked feast on a day like this is too traditional. How about we just order a pizza?" Butch said.
No one disagreed with that idea so they ordered some pizza.
The pizza arrived and they set it down on the table, along with the breadsticks, hot wings, and the lasagna (for Garfield), and the drinks.
Each of them took a slice of pizza and put it on their plates.
"Now then, let's say grace, shall we?" Ariel said.
After saying a prayer of thanks to the Lord, the family began to eat.
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It was 8:00 at night and the family members were beginning to leave. Tom, Butch, Meathead, and Lightning were among the last ones to part ways.
"It was great to see you guys again." Lightning said.
Ariel walked up to them.
"I'll be sad to see you guys go. We had a lot of fun today." Ariel said.
"I guess this is goodbye, then." Butch said.
The five siblings hugged for a long moment before they separated.
"Well, I guess we'll see you later." Meathead said.
"Bye." Ariel said.
After saying their good-byes, they parted ways.
Tom, Butch, and Jerry got in their car and drove to their mansion.
"Glad that's over" Jerry said.
"Yeah. I really am sad to leave though." Butch said.
"Why are you crying about this, anyway? We'll see them again soon enough. Thanksgiving is in one week, remember?" Tom said.
"Oh, yeah!" Butch said.
"You mean we have to do that all over again in one week? Good grief! Who's dumb idea was it to have a family reunion one week before Thanksgiving?!" Jerry asked.
Butch laughed.
The car made it into the driveway and Jerry and the two brothers walked out of the car and got in the mansion.
Spike was reading Tyke and Nibbles a bedtime story when the guys walked in the door.
"Oh, hey guys, did you enjoy the reunion?" Spike asked.
"I don't want to talk about it." Jerry said as he walked away, mumbling about monkeys, and dresses, and bad kids.
"What's with him?" Spike asked.
"He had a bad day. It's best not to bother him." Butch said.
He yawned.
"I'm going to bed." he said, "Night."
"Goodnight."
And so, the residents of the Tom and Jerry Mansion went to bed and fell asleep.
- end of chapter -
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First off, let's give a round of applause to Dark Fox Tailz who had came up with several of the ideas for this chapter and he is one of the main reasons that this chapter turned out this way. I WAS going to put Santa in it until I realized that his presence would have made this chapter longer than should be and I really didn't want to make a Family Reunion Part 5.
Anyway, I have NO ideas at all for what I should do for the next chapter. None at all. I've kind of hit a writer's block.
It's like the plot bunnies in my head just went into hibernation. So, if you want a faster update then you should either
A) Give me some ideas on things that you think should happen
Or
B) Hope like heck that I can come up with something.
See you next time (if there IS a next time).