Write date: 12-04; 12-30
Welcome to the 'unlucky' chapter 13! :)
Firstly, I deeply apologise for the long wait, guess you could call it lack of inspiration, besides school.
And despite myself saying 'cut to the chase' here's a fun fact:
Name meanings: Soubi's mother's name is Akio Agatsuma, according to the wikia anyway, but in vol 11( I think) Ritsu called her Chouko.
And appearantly it means:
Chou- butterfly
ko-child
(other kanji combinations are available)
What gives Ritsu? Coincidence? o.O
RECAP: Ritsu-sustained multiple injuries (gouged eye, wounded shoulders, arm) before found, stabbed in the garden, right now in rehabilitation. Minami Tomoko-Ritsu's mother- a haunting memory to him.
-X-X-X-
-A month before-
A grave, borded by a headstone.
It was overgrown with grass, the flowers had long wilted upon their arrival as well. It was obvious to anyone who would come accross it and instantly wanted to get away from such a melancholic view, this grave wasn't taken care of in the least...
The stone was left to decay, the grass will sleek down like freshly combbed hair too. That would be the end, that the grave could witness in the near future.
The old, corroding name on the stone informed, that the eternal rest belonged to the Minami family. Minami Kizuru-Ritsu's former father...
Now the headmaster stood infront of it, with a devious, maybe disgusted smirk going down his lips. Ritsu seemed like taking punishment, or being scolded like a child for not washing his hands or something similar. Guess a person will always remain as a kid in his parents eyes...
"Can we go already?" Soubi perked up, walking closer to his teacher from the other side, as the pebbles crunched below his feet.
"Yes. I'm done."
The next grave looked even worse... No, Soubi would be making a joke out of himself calling that thing anything near to a memorial.
It was a few good kilometres away from the cemetery. When Ritsu finally shut off the car's engine, motioning his head to Soubi like a sign:' We're here.' The blonde stared at it for atleast a whole minute, trying to comprehend what was that and why was he there anyway.
The only thing that had cought his attention in the never ending horizon of grass and occasional woods, were glass and cement remains poking out of the thick grass.
Soubi shifted his gaze to his sensei, who slowly walked closer to the significantly big pile of rubble. Again his face was quite clear of any pain, or memories... It just seemed blank or shutted off. Wandering somewhere?
In so his expression was uncomparable to the broken, nearly shaking from hurt Ritsu, he witnessed.
It was a few days prior, when lost-in-thoughts Soubi stumbled into his sensei, learning to play piano in the Seven Voices backyard garden, their chat roamed into the subject of Ritsu's parents.
And now, the headmaster asked the former student to tag along, if he wished. On one side of the coin, spending more time outside was beneficial for Soubi, who still lingered over the thought of dead Ritsuka.(The past-Soubi didn't knew Ritsuka lived and had personality dissorder.) Though, being with the person, who abandoned him and stole his virginity was something else... Damn. He could've skipped this trip.
"Sensei, I've noticed something," Soubi broke the ice of the quiet, that grew rather eerie.
"Hm?"
"Was this used to be a town?"
"What make's you say that?" Sensei wondered absentmindedly, when the man began walking around, keeping his head low.
"Ah.. I can see the other houses in the distance." Soubi pointed to the road up ahead. Indeed homes could be seen far away." And there are some unused buildings on the left. Normally one would assume..."
"And you're wrong. Soubi-kun." Ritsu snickered, making the blonde frown at his teacher. Then the silver-haired male picked up a glass shard, inspecting it from every side just to throw it to the soil yet again.
"This was just a small community, it had been a village at first, but then people moved away... That's how my father afforded this." Ritsu kicked a wooden plank, whilst Soubi watched his movements intentually.
"This was your home?"
"No. More like a country house... Since people started to fly away, the prices fell tremedously. We even had a separate guest house with a sauna and a pond."
He kept his hands in pockets and motioned his head behind himself, where another pile lay.
Soubi stayed quiet, not prolonging the conversation, while rubbing his hands together, as the cold Auttum's breeze began to echo. The cold air finally kicked in, showing it's fangs as a warning to get ready for Winter.
In the meantime, Ritsu began reminiscing by himself, not caring if his former student listened or not. Maybe he just needed to voice out what was kept inside and locked for so many years.
"The reason for the sudden abandoning is still covered stories..." The man sighed, slowly striding between the maze, that the debris created.
"As I heared this village was uncommonly religious and it's people had close bonds...But one year their head priest just vanished into thin air. And a devoured body was found days after..." Ritsu exhaled, avoiding glass shards
"But the catch was..." He gave Soubi a deep glance.
"It was atleast two year old remains-murdered... As things got weirder and weirder, with occasional rumours from the villagers, this place was tagged as cursed for no reason."
Sensei shrugged. And the blonde looked back up at him, remembering Ritsu'-sensei's previous story about his mother. Suddenly he murmured, so Ritsu wouldn't catch it.
"But there actually was something... Wasn't there?"
"What?"
"No. Nothing. Continue your ramble."
"Oh?" The silverette widened his eyes at his student, walking back to him and bursting out suddenly."Hahah... Soubi-kun, I wouldn't be standing there if I were you."
"What?"
"Somewhere around there... I can't recall correctly... We burried my mother... Who knows... It was said, she had been cursed by a demon, you might catch the same disease..."
"Wha...?" The blonde whirled his head frantically, but Ritsu's laughter just increased. Soubi paused, then gave him a glare.
"Oh... I lied... You actually believe we burried our mother in front of our house?"Sensei raised an eyebrow at his angered student. He forgot how fun it was to toy with the younger's head, messing up his thoughts and beliefs, leaving him weak and vulnerable. Easy to contaminate and control... Ritsu exhaled, closing his eyes. How he missed those days when Soubi had been a stupid, unexperianced child.
"Actually, her grave is somewhere near the forest..." The teacher pointed at the blurry woods after a moment. The trees covered the far horizon, as much as the eye saw.
"Something... Something's not right."Soubi stated with a dry throat, instantly.
"Hm?"
"Yes... it's wrong... Something's wrong with you sensei."
Ritsu side-glanced at him quite surprised, hiding his shock with a devious smirk. After a second, he walked closer to the younger.
"Ah. You're worried about me again?" He haulted, being only a few inches away from his student and leaning his head to the side.
"When did you became so caring anyway? I wasn't the best father to earn your love... You finally warmed up to me?"
"Firstly. No, I still despise you and I have plenty of reasons for it." Soubi countered coldly, whilst his Sensei slid his feet to the side, planning to walk away.
"And as I said. I lived with you for far too long to see through your mask... Ritsu-sensei, you never touched the fatherly subject. You never cared... You had treated me like a property..."
"That's not true... You were the person I cared for most. Besides your mother of cource." Ritsu purred behind his breath, not sparing him a glance. The blonde cought his arm though, preventing sensei's escape.
"More like obsessed over."
The silverette didn't shot anything back, nor spat any false excuses at Soubi. He closed his eyes, wishing to not see the other's face and waited.
"Ritsu-sensei..." Soubi faced down, feeling embarassed."You've changed... You're not acting like you used to... Not that I miss those times... And I doubt the age could've affected your personality... But I know what can..."
He finally jerked his hand away from the silver-haired man as if it was burning... Seemingly noticing the grip was too long.
"Sensei... Did something bad happened to you?"
"Stop blabbering nonsense, Soubi-kun."
"I'm serious. You never told me about your parents before, but... When you did... You were drenched in fear."
The headmaster haulted at those words, recalling the noon in the shed, when the headmaster unconsciously let it slip...
"And then this visit speak's for itself."Soubi crossed his hands on his chest." Why did you suddenly felt the need to drag yourself here, if you hadn't cared for more than ten years? Face it Sensei, you let your true feelings and secrets slip."
In truth, the former student noticed some years ago, that besides how cold, sometimes affectionate Ritsu acted, he kept his true emotions intacked, as if afraid to let them loose from their cages. The most noticible moments were, when the headmaster would begin to make weird, or simply unfitting for himself actions, that appeared out of thin air.
That was a sign, that something hidden inside of him breached out.
This sudden 'parents visit' or the want to indulge oneself in music after so many years of not practising, was the hugest evidence that led Soubi to... What exactly?
"Where are you heading?" The blonde wondered, seeing Ritsu walk out of the scene.
"You can stay here, Soubi-kun. I have one more visit to make."
The younger watched his Sensei go for a moment, Ritsu's back arched forward as if he was an old man...
X X X
The memorial rock lay on the side of the forest, near a small parting of bushes, that hid a quarter of it. The other side was decorated by golden leaves, that still kept falling so ever silently.
Ritsu dragged his feet closer, as they made a sweet crackle from the stepped and crunched petals...
His mother died from a disease, a virus to be precise. Then the head priest claimed, that Minami Tomoko had been possesed by a demon-that had been their reason for not burrying her... In conclusion, the remaining family had to bury her in secret, by themselves... As if that wasn't enough, the memorial got demolished by a fierce storm. In the end, the stone was the only thing left standing. Their summer house had taken an unexpected fire outbreak too... It appeared that misfortunes had trailed their every step that horrid year, destroying every memory and hope itself...
Ritsu gazed at the lonely rock with deadpan eyes, not actually mourning.
His thoughts roamed free and he let them linger far from today, far into the once ignored and forgotten past:
'Stop... Please stop... I'm scared...'
The hollow eyes didn't cease... It didn't stop...
'Please mother!'
She watched him greedely. The apparition still followed...
'StOooOOP!'
Again. Again. Again...Today and tomorrow. It didn't cease...
"Ritsu-sensei!" A well known voice snapped the teacher halfway back to reality. He didn't moved an inch nonetheless, as Soubi came closer calling him again.
"Sensei, you look pale." The blonde remarked, glancing at his face once, then back at the gravestone, the former was standing in front of.
"So this is the rumoured grave you told me about?"Soubi spoke up, when the silence coming from his Sensei polluted the atmosphere.
"Have to say I expected something better than this if your father was relig..."
"Let's go." Ritsu stated dryly, spinning around and cutting the younger off.
"What?" The blonde looked confused, catching up to the headmaster's fast pace after a moment." That's relevantly short... You haven't visited them for years, you should take your time. The school won't die in a couple of hours..."
"Soubi-kun, we're going!"
X X X
-Three weeks ago-
Another gloomy morning rose, when the rain scraped the soil for a few good hours already, causing numerous puddles to form in the garden.
Soubi knocked on the door, he knew all to well. He was carrying a folder in his left arm and didn't bothered for the man on the other end to permit entrance.
"Sensei, this is from Nagisa, she said she wanted you to take a look at the forms." The blonde splurted out hurriedly.
The principal sat at his table, raising his eyes at the light-haired man for a second, upon hearing Nagisa's name, he went back to his scribbling again.
As Soubi heared no answer, he just walked closer to his Sensei's desk, slamming the folder down. However a smooth, female hand snatched it away after a short second.
The blonde frantically turned to the unexpected guest, his body convulcing for an instant, as a response too.
The teenager appeared rather short, compared to Soubi. She wasn't a virgin either. Her hair were white as snow and short-nearly reaching her shoulders, the skin was even paler. The thick ivory strands covered her right eye fully and she wore spectacles,while being dressed in a white nurse's dress.
"Oh, the same problem again..." The teenager mused to herself, flipping through the folder. However that soon ended, when an annoyed Ritsu took it away right before her eyes.
"Thank you, Yune-chan."
When that was done, the silverette glanced at Soubi, walking back to his seat. He nodded to him in a tired manner, inspecting the new fresh cut near his student's throat.
It seemed the new bruise irritated him. Well atleast, he made itbhimself yesterday night. It was a mark left by their struggle, when Soubi wished to commit suicide, attempting to slash his own throat, luckily Ritsu's foot collided with the blonde's stomach just in time before Soubi ended his life that night... He vowed to protect his student from that unsighty fate.
"I... I'm fine."
"Good..." Sensei appearantly took it as an answer."Now vacate my office, both of you."
That's how they were ushered out and with door slammed behind them...
"Well, now..." The ivory-haired female mused lightly. "I think it would wise to get to know each other, seeing how we're kicked out."
She jumped in front of him, bowing slightly.
"Call me Yune, I'll be a new nurse at this school." She extended her small pale hand to him. Soubi took it gently, afraid as if he could crush such a fragile palm.
"Agatsuma Soubi, a former student of Seven Voices."
"A former student?" Yune blinked in confusion, beginning to walk down the corridor sideways to her new companion."Well, should have expected that, you look older than me... But the way you talked to the principal, I thouht you were a colleague of his."
"No." Soubi shook his head."I suppose you're new to this place. Maybe a tour?"
X X X
-A week before the incident-
"God, what happened? Are you alright headmaster?!"
Minami Ritsu stood in front of the infirmary with a dull expression... Even though his previous emotionless mask was fractured in the middle. As his right eye had been messily wraped up in a roller bandage, that was diyed in dark crimson from the dryed blood, it's sides tucking out...
Ritsu looked quite pained and irritated by it. He only got the injury yesterday night and couldn't even escape Soubi's watchful eye. He was the first to witness the wound, when they were in bed. And now, even more unnecessary drama had leaked out into the highlight. Which just rose turmoil in Ritsu's brain, nothing else. Panic never granted fortunes to anybody.
"Sit on the bed." Yune ordered lightly, emptying a drawer with medical equipment." Have you cleaned it?"
"No..."
"So how long had it stayed... Like this?" The ivory-haired girl motioned her head to the man, trying her hardest to sound polite and steady.
"Since last night."
"Are you for real?!" She shrieked, but then quickly covered her mouth with her long fingers, bowing."Gomen. Forgive me headmaster."
"Agh... Just do something already..."
"You're right it need's treatment urgently. Painkiller time!" She beemed, while holding a syringe.
"... You're satisfied with the job atleast."
"Of cource. Why wouldn't I?"
Yune walked closer, while Ritsu layed down on the infirmary bed. She began rolling up his sleeve, though paused soon, giving a concerned eye to the man.
"It's alright... Don't mind...Those were just... I had to numb some pain before..."
The silverette's inner elbow had been decorated in needle pricks a lot of them. Numb some pain? Would be accurate to say a lot. The scenery was unpleasant. So the teenager swallowed hardly, still keeping her voice nice and warm.
"Had you done it yourself?"
"Stole some painkillers from Nagisa...Ah... S.She won't notice any time soon..."
"Did those other... Injuries healed yet? I could take a look if you want, sensei. What if there's an infection?!"
"Then it's an infection." Ritsu shrugged apathetically, taking his glasses off.
"I know it's not my place to say, but how did this happen? It's not like a trip could do this."
"Exactly. It's not your buisiness." He grunted, watching her uncover the bandages, hiding his eye." You need to know what happened not how or why."
Eventually, Yune began cleaning his wound with a cotton diyed in ointment, not asking anymore questions. However leaned to his face, when she was done. The girl laced her fingers on his cheeks, gazing into his eyes. Ritsu showed no emotion nonetheless, he still felt numb. While the teenager stared into his only eye as if trying to guess his inner thoughts or secrets.
It wasn't possible. It never will. No matter how well a person will get close to Ritsu. They will never guess his true heart, true feelings and the immense pain he locked away, somewhere beyond, somewhere where he'll never open... Although it'll creak the door for a wide entrance itself...
The malice crept out...
It saw what he saw...
It felt what he felt...
It lived how he desired...
It was alive and breathing, though he'd wish it wasn't...
He escaped her gaze forthwith. It wasn't her right to know, it was his own problem. And he'll take care of it himself. This damaged eye marked one thing though... It'll all be over soon. Very soon.
"HyaaAAH!" A shriek invaded the small infirmary.
The headmaster didn't even had to point his head at the intruder to know who came in. The ear killing racket was proof itself- Nagisa.
"What the hell are you doing, Ritsu?! Disgusting pervert!"
The male just then noticed, that Yune was half lying on the edge of the bed next to him.
"Ah... Hi!" The ivory-haired girl with glasses slowly got up, still keeping her palms on Ritsu's cheeks. She smiled akwardly.
"She was fixing my injury." The silverette shot back.
"Well that's why I'm here!"
"Did someone call you, Nagisa?"He cocked an eyebrow."No."
"Your Soubi literally stormed my office in the morning!"
"Oh? So is Soubi-kun responsible for my life then? No."
"Idiot! He tried to help you! We all do!"
"So you're worried about me? How nice."
"Don't change the subject!"
Yune watched the bicker from the side, not knowing what to say, or to just waltz out, leaving them to solve their problems by themselves. The matter didn't touched her anymore.
At that time another figure shown up by the doorway. The teacher cut his sentence in the middle, spotting Soubi leaning a hand on the doorway and panting from running.
"There you are sensei!"
The silverette only glanced at his student, though his eyes bit down annoyance, burning inside of the man, along with his thoughts:'Who in the world asked you to gossip, Soubi-kun?'
"Guess what, Soubi?!" Nagisa instantly piped up in a teasing manner, turning to face him. Ritsu could only hope for the worse. There was no telling what poison might leak out from her lips.
"Your sensei's hitting on a teenager!"
"Ah..." Was the only sound coming from his student, as the blonde frowned his eyebrows, whilst darting at his sensei with disgust. The same old, bitter disgust he kept on for years... So it didn't pass, figures. Ritsu did took his ears by force. The blame did solely fall on him, he didn't regretted nonetheless.
"Thank's Yune-chan." The silver-haired male grumbled silently for her to hear after a silent minute had passed."I'll be leaving now."
He climbed off the bed, planning to walk off, hearing a thousand of obligations reaching his ear.
"Hey, sensei wait up! You can't just leave like this!"
"Ritsu!"
"You need a surgery! This kind of wound it..."
They kept echoing in his ears, though not reaching his mind. The pleadings and atrocious yells seemed distant, hollow, not here, not at that time. Somewhere far, far away. Beyond. Imaginary and false.
The endless hands belonging to no one, it seemed to him, tugged at his shoulders and arms, forcing him to stop.
Bodies, just empty vessels, that Ritsu had the gift to witness, borded his path, fading and standing in front again. Did they had any meaning? Or did he lost the meaning himself?
He just wanted to get out of there, be alone, compose himself. Why couldn't those false images and noises abandon him?
X X X
"Finally. Found you."
Ritsu exhaled, recognising Soubi's voice in the distance. He didn't cease to play the piano, sitting in the arbor however. Well, atleast trying. The headmaster was practising the same melody for over a month now, whenever he got the chance for a free minute, which didn't accure often. He was better at it actually: making lesser mistakes, feeling the melody, not falling off rhythm.
"Sensei, I want to speak to you." Soubi proclaimed, coming to stand behind his teacher."Could you stop for a minute."
No answer.
The student sighed, tapping closer and grabbing Ritsu's shoulder to gain some attention.
The teacher released a hurtful wail, as a protest, making Soubi jerk off.
"I-I'm sorry. Forgot there was an injury there."
"Well... Speak." Ritsu growled, rubbing the sore shoulder, that soon became diyed in crimson from the harsh pull.
"Why are you doing this to yourself?" Soubi finally gritted out after a short pause.
"Doing what?"
"Don't act as if you don't know what I'm on about. Sensei, we all see there is something wrong with you. We saw the injuries, one or another. Don't deny it, saying that they don't relate to anything."
He paused staring into his sensei's tired, healthy eye, that constantely followed the paths or bushes, breaking any eyecontact.
"Listen to me. We just want to help you."
He walked closer, then slowly and timidly layed a hand on his sensei's cheek. The blonde was cautious of that action as if Ritsu's cheek could burn his hand.
"I want to help you."
"You're waisting your time."
Soubi frowned catching only a glimpse of the silent murmur, a soundless minute took over, not even the wind terminated the solitude.
"These wounds..." The blonde began quietly, lacing his hand on Ritsu's forehead, softly caressing the edge of the bandage, hiding his damaged eye." Why, sensei?... What's happening to you?"
The silverette only blinked his pupil tiredly.
"We'll talk later." He muttered, spinning around and eventually leaving Soubi's palm free from the touch."Leave me alone for now."
"B.but..."
"Don't you understand?!" Ritsu side-glanced at his student with a darting gaze.
"I don't need your help! Or anyone else's at that matter. There's nothing you can do, so leave me be, Soubi-kun."
"I..." The blonde stammered.
Before the silver-haired man emitted a heavy sigh, looking over at Soubi for the last time. And it seemed the blonde finally got the message, when he slowly spun his feet on the tiles with a defeated, saddened face, exiting the arbor. And leaving a deafening silence, lingering in the eerie atmosphere. He left...
Left a sore shoulder as well.
When that was settled, Ritsu gently pushed an ivory key, that released a high, pleasant note, which drifted along the silence as if being the only sound capable of perfecting the harmony this garden once held.
Soubi couldn't understand, he wouldn't, even if Ritsu chose to tell him everything. About the haunting past, his dark hidden mind. And insanity-that beast, that followed him day and night. The wounds, that led after, the meds, that put it to rest, numbing his senses, with a bigger doze injected every day. It was easier this way, better to stay quiet.
In fact, the man had already lost hope for his survival. He will die, Ritsu knew that atleast. At first he still clinged to that thin thread, scratching at every possibility, until they a proved to be useless.
The silverette glided his fingers through a couple of notes, hitting a semitone.
If only Soubi could have come sooner...
Back when the headmaster still fought for every chance. Soubi could've helped, finally eliminating the threat. Then the silver-haired man wouldn't have had been in this helpless state. If only Soubi had come earlier, when hope still lived...
Now, it was... Too late...
The man finally rose his eyes from the keyboard, to peer at the arbor's opening, as he played the piano. A white, naked figure stood in front. Eyes hollow and face shifted akwardly to the side, shouting at him. Soundlessly.
'Another mind game.' Ritsu convinced himself, shaking his head to eliminate the fear, that caused his body to shiver and clouded his thoughts.
'Too much meds, that's it.'
Despite his beliefs, another one appeared from the side looking the same, minus the face defect, but adding a skinny body with the breast bone, practically shinning through.
Ritsu exhaled staggerly.
There were more standing behind him now... Just like in the dream he once had.
They surrounded him...
Watching him...
Shrieking at him...
Threatening with the same disgusting fate...
He burried his head into the piano, trying to hide from the demons. A stiffened groan escaped his lungs as if an opposition to the insanity, his eyes regarded as truth.
Where was his salvation?