The Chronicles of the White Dragon Part 2: The Crossroads of Time

by Blackshadow999

When things of history thought lost begin to be seen once more; fear grips many, none can choose how events will turn out in the end. What is left from an ancient war is rediscovered by Saber, but he finds more than he bargained for. An enemy long forgotten returns! and intends to finish wha they started. A tale traversing and transcending even the bounds of time itself. Part 2of3

9. 9 Path From Regret to Serenity

A/n

Here it is! The last chapter that I needed to revise! … so much work, but well worth it in the end. Now If I could finish school work this well I would be set. Sorry getting side tracked; so readers chapter 9, Saber's… full reaction to the events of the Ethereal Archives and it isn't going to be all neat and pretty! I have also received from some that I should update my profile so that my list of character bios are accurate and nice. Well guess what I am doing that! It isn't done completely yet but, many of the characters are better and the whole thing is more uniformed. So yeah me getting work done and on with the story!

Chapter 9: Path From Regret to Serenity

-Recap-

"A couple you say? Try multitudes of them screaming in my head! Then do not get me started on all the images that flashed through my mind."

"That is not supposed to happen."

"Oh it did; then had nightmares every night since then, rarely the same memory at any point."

"That is interesting as well as unexpected."

"You are telling me."

You know there is a phrase that comes to mind at a time like this, 'I used to have a handle on life, and then it broke'! Why might you ask, do I think of that phrase for my current situation? Well… I have been told possible facts that have brought much of what I know into question. So much so, that parts of my world have crashed down and horrible the fall was and then there are other areas that are badly shaken! Overall my 'personal view of the world' or my perspective of it has been forced harshly to change and I'm not fond of forced change.

Back to the analogy I have chosen to use for my current standing. The handle I mentioned before, it may have been squeaky in the way of not working smoothly and perfectly. It often didn't work well a good amount of the time. Hell, sometimes that handle would be abstinent to the point I would wonder why I bother trying to use it as it gets stuck in place, but most of the time it worked even if it was not the best. That's how it was before I went to the Archive; then my handle on life didn't just break, oh no, it broke off entirely and got lost forever-freaking-more!

The cause of this perspective degeneration and decay? That would be meeting and talking with the other white dragon named Bahamut! I can't say I… liked the conversation with Bahamut… I had been a part of it. In reality, I don't know what exactly to think with that chat. I'm having difficulty deciding whether the source is worse than the subject matter or vice versa… I could go either way. I'm so lost and confused right now; I don't know how to take anything that I have heard.

Anyway, the good thing for me in my view was the conversation with Bahamut didn't last very long. Yet it was much more awkward for me than when it began in more ways than I want to count. I wouldn't doubt that it felt as awkward for Bahamut as it does for me. I pretty much stated that I am not pleased with him at all. I mean, I in essence told him he failed being a parent without actually saying that directly. I still don't want to admit Bahamut could and is likely my male biological sire… that being part of the painful topic that involves Bahamut and myself.

The subject of parents… has always been a hard one for me. I haven't had anyone that I can honestly call a 'parent' in my life at all that I can remember. What's worse, I have a lack of a good parental role model! The one who I'm referring to with this subject, would be the douchebag of a man who I have called 'uncle'… who is unlikely my real uncle. In fact I have for the last couple of years called my uncle 'Uncle Douche Bag' as a term to portray my feelings towards him… in whispers under my breath and behind his back. If he heard me referring to him like that, he would use it as an excuse to beat me more, I would bet. Although it was unsurprisingly a comforting knowledge that he isn't my uncle; I could now dislike the man freely and not have to tolerate his crap as he isn't family to me.

Back to the previous subject. The majority of the conversation's subject matter after my… outburst like reaction; concerned more of the specifics from the time of 'the great war'. It was a far more extensive matter than I had ever imagined! 'War' by its technical definition; is basically a state of conflict between two or sometimes more groups, normally two opposing sides. Granted, there is usually much more to war that just that one statement; but it is the simplest and broadest way of saying what war is. I comprehend the idea even though I haven't participated in anything that can be considered as war before myself. I have gotten into fights and brawls on occasions, but those are more bouts to settle things; never would be what I would say is war. Still, to hear about just how bad things had been during that time; made my blood flow cold as the arctic area of the ocean is supposed to be. The numbers of those that died in a single day during the time; were as horrifying as they were staggering! And I don't just mean dragons; I'm including cheetahs moles and even apes in the death toll count! Learning this even put my greater than steel constitution I have, to the test and pushed it hard!

My view and understanding of the Ancient Enemy had increased tremendously from this conversation. As I was expecting they were seriously out to kill me and as quickly as they could; any info was helpful! One of the few good things that came out of it in my personal yet humble opinion! There are few words that can describe how terrifying and sickening, the methods that the ancient enemy used during the great war on a regular basis! Most of those words would be considered profanity and curses. I would say that those who were killed outright by being stabbed or some other simple way of ending life were the lucky ones. Those who were not; they weren't as lucky as those were normally killed slowly and painfully, a little more than fifty percent of the time they were tortured until they died. Either way a very unpleasant idea to imagine in any way!

From the tale I was told by Bahamut, I found I had been right in my suspicions. The enemy being cunning and ruthless from the memories that I have witnessed so far yet now I knew there was more to them than I had known. One of the fact that stuck out to me when I had been listening I began to see some of the reasons why they were so gosh darn meticulous in what they do. They had nearly lost everything they had been working for once… whatever their goal was. It had been due to their impatience and dependence on someone that wasn't with them originally… I'm referring to the traitor Bahamut had implied previously. They had also underestimated those they had been fighting… white dragons in particular.

Apparently, or according to Bahamut; white dragons weren't originally a natural occurrence in the dragon race before the Great War, which kind of surprises me in a way. They were created artificially by means I didn't really understand the explanation that was given. Something to do with a weird alchemy or something of the like and magic… the explanation doesn't make sense to me at all. However, the fact I found interesting, was that white dragons were specifically 'made' or created to fight the ancient enemy. We had the means to do major harm to them which others didn't. I would guess from that fact alone that actually fighting the ancient enemy face to face was not easy and also unpleasant! In laments terms, they are a pain to fight and are hard to injure by conventional means. But since I haven't fought one yet, I can't say if there is any truth to my theory based on these assumptions.

During the time of the Great War and afterward, the ancient enemy had learned many lessons. One specifically they had been strict to adhere to from then on; white dragons are dangerous and shouldn't be underestimated without dire consequences following that decision! That was a big lesson number one; lesson number two would be rushing the steps in one's plans, doesn't go or end well for those concerned. Since the Great War, the ancient enemy hadn't been taking any chances and had been killing every white dragon that came along. Their reasoning was so that they didn't need to worry about such being a questionable variable that would be needed to be taken into account in the work towards the end goal in mind. I didn't get any more information about this 'traitor' that has been inferred… which worries me a bit. Those who break the trust of others, it becomes hard to trust them again; even if they were forced in some way to do the betrayal that they did. However, I do not see the need to concern myself at the moment about the subject as they are likely dead and gone.

After the talk, my mental state was improving to an extent by the time I left that room. My focus on the use that the information could provide had helped me quite a bit. It helped me to focus on the thoughts that were occupying my mind and keep my attention off the other things that weren't helping me right now. Nevertheless, as much as I tried to focus on the facts and logic from the things I learned, I couldn't ignore the negative effects that the chat between Bahamut and myself had on me. My emotional state… wasn't doing well… really at all… honestly it had only leveled out temporarily after the earlier near crashing nose dive it had taken at learning… the hypothetical viability of a patriarchal relationship that Bahamut had with me… I have trouble even saying that there is a possibility of a relationship! I am resorting to my habit of coping by being vague… the more of a problem something is for me to deal with the vaguer I tend to be! But I would rather not dwell on the subject of a figure that is supposed to take care of another that they're responsible for, at the moment at least. It is already doing extensive damage to me!

I don't know how bad another nose dive in my emotional state would be for me; I would surmise it would be worse than the first dive at a bare minimum! I don't want to have an emotional 'crash' occur when there are so many others around me… those kind of outbursts are horrible and something that others can't simply look the other way about. I mean, even if those who are here are dead yet not dead… that still makes no sense to me, but it doesn't make the difference! This place is just so dang confusing!

Anyway, the first emotional dive I took; I had done things… cause me to do things… I am ashamed of and would love to forget and pretend never occurred! I had gotten frighteningly close to losing complete mental control I have with myself. On the way to the entrance to which I had entered the archives; I was in glum spirits and Koren had tried to engage me in talking, which wasn't helping me. My state of control was volatile and I was having a great deal of difficulty from having the state become worse!

"Hey Saber… are you okay?"

I was silent; I didn't want to answer. Koren was either blind or trying to be nice. Obviously I wasn't doing well! I don't want to blow up at my first true friend.

"I mean, this is a lot to take in… all the things you have heard."

Ya think Koren?! I would have never guessed that I would be dealing with all the great load of crap I'm now attempting to TAKE IN! … No calm down… it isn't worth it… it isn't worth losing it! Remember… picture your happy place… and what comes when I try thinking of a happy place is a lot of nothing for me… okay rephrase… a place you weren't experiencing as much of a living hell as others! The dojo! … Yes that was a happier place for me most of the time! Ah practicing martial arts… Unhindered and encouraged stress relief via sparring... training with Master Kai… Ah such wonderful memories of nicer times! Koren's voice brought me out of my attempts to calm myself.

"So it would be surprising if you were taking this like nothing was wrong… kind of like you are appearing to right now."

I stopped and looked at Koren. I exerted most of the mental discipline to hold myself in firm check so that I didn't blow up again, but it was a difficult thing to do right now. DANG YOU REALITY! CAN'T YOU LEAVE ME BE FOR FIVE FREAKING MINUTES?! IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR MY PEACE OF MIND?! NO! … I will not have any kind of a mental or emotional break downs here… today… thank you! I am better than that; to let myself crumble under this pressure! I came close to doing a prat fall and face plant with his question, but caught myself. Ah hello bad luck; thank you for getting me back on task. You have always been extremely good at that, if nothing else good that you do among the bad!

"Am I okay you ask? … No… but I do not know how to put those feelings into words… without spouting a great amount of profanity and cursing… in multiple languages, knowing me. So I will for all others' benefit, not put my current feelings into words!"

Koren smiled at me.

"You will find a way to do so without saying… whatever those things are. You never let anything, no matter how difficult it may be, stop you."

I literally, did a prat fall followed by an amazing face plant hearing that. I was twitching as I was processing what Koren had said and implied! Is Koren… serious?! The dragon race doesn't have profanity or curs… this… is… one of those times… I have to wonder… how dragons are able to express feelings… accurately! Why am I not only going through, but also being forcefully shoved into this stinking pile of foul crap?! What have I done to deserve this?! I picked myself up after stopping the tears of frustration from leaking out of my eyes. I took a moment to collect myself before I answer Koren.

"Normally I would agree; however, I have no idea what to think of this… all of this… in anything, other than using… a lot… of… foul… language… that I have strived not to use in my normal speech patterns. It comes from an old habit that comes back to haunt me from time to time; sometimes at rather inconvenient moments!"

Yes, I used to have a much fouler and dirtier mouth than I do now! It may be hard to believe, but it is true. I used to get dirty looks at the very least from teachers and adults most of the time for the things I used to say. I had a mouth, which any mother… if I had one; would have long ago washed out with copious amounts of soap… for a long period! How long? …Um… days, weeks, months; who knows? I however, got myself 'clean' of my… extremely common use of profanities and cursing years ago; during the time I began to acquire my mental control and discipline. It wasn't much longer before Koren and I were back in the first room with the desk. I parted from my friend. Before I had left Koren had said to come back and visit and I said I would… at some point.

-Scene Change—

After I had come out of the tunnels I ascended out of the canyon and just kept flying. As time passed; I didn't know how long I had been flying nor in what direction after leaving the Ethereal Archive. I, just kept going. The world, the night skies; none of it registered to my senses beyond anything being in my path right in front of me. I would just turn when something came up in front of me. My movements were being controlled by reflex that have been developed years ago and did so wonderfully. I was having an internal battle of my emotions versing my logic and discipline and it was a messy and bloody battle to be sure!

It didn't take all that long after I had come out of the canyon, when my emotional state then took a second, more dangerous nose dive. That last dive, as I said was a crashing nose dive… this one was more like a vertical plummet downward in comparison. It was taking all the remaining mental control and self-restraint I had, to keep the chaotic emotional storm that raged in me from bursting out of me right then and there. The storm of feelings were gaining strength every passing second. The words that Bahamut had said to me, the implied meanings echoed and bounced around in my skull. I couldn't ignore them as they kept going and repeating in my mind.

"A parent? That is what I am… my offspring."

With hearing that particular line again I knew I needed to land NOW! It didn't matter where I landed at this time; I just had to! I plummeted down and landed softly; I looked around where I was to see if this would be a safe place for me to unload. I found myself in a glade that was surrounded by trees that looked similar to oak trees. On the side opposite of me was a tree that had fallen and the place a couple of feet up the trunk it had split where the rest of the tree had fallen. There was a small pond in the center of this glade and the pond was still, like a surface of newly made glass. The glade was quiet and peaceful… well that is about to change in a hundred and eighty degree kind of way!

When I found that I was indeed alone, which I am adamant in having when I vent my emotions. I let go of the firm control and lid I had put on my emotions, which were slipping. With nothing to keep the feelings in check like I have over the years, they poured out of me like a flood released! It came out in a shout of raw emotion.

"DANG IT!"

I struck the water of the pond with the anger that I was feeling. I was enraged; I was in torment over the things I had learned recently. My world had been turned upside down and thrown down so that it could shatter and it was tormenting me in ways I have never experienced. I wanted scream until I couldn't physically do so any more. I wanted to rip things apart to vent my rage. I had never felt so mad, yet so hurt before in my life that I could remember. That's saying something in my case; when your life is hell most of the time… just a matter of figuring out which tier of Hell I was on! Even when I would get beaten up by others on a frequent basis I didn't feel like this. The times that Uncle Douche Bag had abused me; physically and mentally, it hadn't been like this. The scars I bare will never let me forget what that man did to me, yet the emotions I was feeling now were different. I was mad back at those times, but I had never felt this agonizing torment I was now. Due to the reasons; I couldn't deny possible validity of fact I have just learned. The pain I felt from the denial I had always faced and now having met the one who possibly responsible to an extent, wracked and tortured my soul.

"WHY?!"

I couldn't change the volume of my voice, which was shouting at near my maximum volume. The cries that I had buried and kept myself wouldn't be silenced, but broke forth from me! I haven't felt heartache this bad before, hell I haven't gotten close to this! I had developed the habit and mechanism to not show much a reaction outwardly to anyone. The only time close to this was when I had opened up to Master Kai for the first time and that… well I'll just say that I'm forever grateful for Master Kai's understanding and patience with me.

-Flashback years ago-

I just kept hitting the practice dummy over and over. Master Kai hadn't said one word when he had assigned me this exercise. I was using this to vent my anger of the events of last night. Like many nights my… uncle had come back to the house in a drunken state; he shortly after walking through the door started to say just how much of a waste of his time I was. I tried to ignore him, but that didn't work long. … The cuts and bruises on my back from the literal whipping my uncle gave with his belt still hurt badly and served as a constant reminder of my dislike of him.

At some point in this routine I subconsciously began to imagine that the practice dummy was my uncle! My hits got harder and more anger filled. After a while Master Kai spoke.

"That is enough my young student."

I stopped and turned to face my master.

"That is all for today."

I stared at him.

"But I can keep going master!"

Master Kai raised his hand to silence me.

"I do not doubt you could, however pointless it would be. Your mind and heart are not working together. As long as you fight yourself and your feelings then you will be unable to progress."

"I am not fighting myself."

Master Kai smiled sadly at me.

"A lie that is, young Saber. What is it that troubles you so?"

I clenched my jaw.

"I am fine master!"

"Your fists would say otherwise."

I looked down at my fist to see they were cut and bleeding from the punishment I had been giving them in beating that dummy. My anger increased at this sight. … It was all his fault!

"If you wish to talk about something, as always I will listen."

I felt tears forming in my eyes. I had never admitted to anyone, the things that my uncle did to me. I felt that if I did, it would be like admitting defeat to him and I wouldn't give him that satisfaction! I bowed to Master Kai and started to make my way for the door.

"Young student, a question before you go."

I stopped and turned back to Master Kai.

"What happened to your back for you to struggle to carry yourself like you normally do?"

I held my tongue to keep my angry tirade from coming out.

"I… I slipped and fell."

Master Kai was silent for a moment.

"You have good enough balance to prevent major injuries."

The simple answer from Master Kai perturbed me; for it completely destroyed my attempt to get out of the room without getting into my… 'home life'. Plus the way in which Master Kai had said it irked me for it went against the usual idea my uncle would state to me almost every day. I started shaking with fury at the thought of the man who was my uncle.

"You want to know how I got like this. I got to know what a leather belt feels like when it strikes you! It is all his fault!"

Master Kai sat quietly and listened to my venting tirade as it began.

-End flashback-

I still remember the experience as that was when I found out how good it is to vent and Master Kai also began to help me learn mental control and self-restraint. That alone was a saving grace and the most valuable life lesson; had I not learned the mental control, I don't know where I would be now! However even, with all the control and restraint; this ache in my heart hurt more than a dagger stabbing me. … The apes had done me the service of showing me how that felt. It wouldn't go away. It was clawing away at me from within and no matter what I tried it didn't lessen or leave me.

"WHY… DID I REACT LIKE THAT?!"

I was so ashamed of how I had acted in the study with Bahamut. I have lost my temper before now at times; nonetheless it hasn't ever been to this extent! I have always managed to calm myself down before my emotions broke free of the control I have, much like an animal breaking free of chains binding them. All of the years I have taken, all the time I practiced and meditated to help develop the mental control and self-restraint I have… all that work and then I do that! In this one situation… all that work was hurled out of the window and I had acted like a child throwing a freaking temper tantrum! Where is a rock to hide my face from the light of day when I need one?!

I am appalled with myself… no I was disgusted with the way I had acted! I am not a child; I am better than that… to let myself lose it like that! The years of work, the strides I had made in those years that had passed, in my mental, physical and emotional standing… If I could have taken a second to calm down and assess the ideas of the situation, it could have gone smoothly! But NOOOOO I blow up and act like a little brat of a child! With the help that Master Kai had given me… I can't face him after how I had acted with Bahamut!

"HOW COULD I HAVE BLOWN UP LIKE THAT?!"

I swiped a forepaw as hard as I could at a medium thick tree trunk and I left deep grooves from my claws raking the trunk. My strike didn't end after I gashed the trunk of the tree; my forearm kept going and it hit the ground. When it had my middle talon on that paw broke off, though I was in no mood or state to care. I was blinded by my emotions. I was lost between my anger and self-disgust; going from one to another, switching from one, then a second later to the other. I scraped the hard ground with my talons, wearing them down. The majority of my muscles were tensing up and were in spasm of their own accord. I was so mad; at the world around me and mostly at myself! I was losing the discipline I had over my body… and that was infuriating me all the more! I let lose a frustrated roar!

"RAHH!"

I hated what was happening to me as I hated what these emotions were doing to me. Yet most of all; I hated myself at this moment for how I had acted! I felt depressed with the way I had held myself… no I was outraged with my conduct! I began to sob in anger; tears flowing from my eyes. It didn't help that the voices had started whispering in the back of my mind; I was giving them none of my attention at this point. I was too busy chiding and criticizing myself.

"WHY WAS I SO STUPID?!"

Well… the quickest way I know to rid myself of emotional pain is to replace it with something else that is similar until I forget what is troubling me so much. All I can say is thank goodness for my high pain tolerance; it's times like this I have need of it! Without hesitation, I proceeded to slam my body into the ground and the trunks of trees. This due to the methodology of ridding myself of this stupidity through pain; this done by punishing myself. It was in my view, to forget and move on after the foolishness I had committed back in the archives. I haven't found a better way to attempt to rid myself of the pain that my heart was giving me. This was a method had worked in the past; that was to give myself something else to pay attention to. So involved in the application of my method; I didn't notice when another had come into proximity. The only way I became aware of the other that was there was physical contact. That contact came when something collided with me, settling on my back and held me from doing further punishment to myself. … She shouldn't have interrupted with my VENTING!

-Lara's POV-

-Hours earlier-

When I had woken up from my dreamless sleep, I found Saber was gone and had worried a little at first. However, I calmed the panicked feeling by reassuring myself that he often went on walks during the night to calm himself from the things he saw in his sleep. I am still worried about Saber, he was acting tense as of late. It had been getting bad this last week; I do not know what to do! I want to help him; I just do not know how. Maybe talking to him would help, but he rarely likes to talk about what is bothering him. Nevertheless, my worry returned as an hour passed and I still saw no sign of him. I know he takes walks to clear his mind, yet this is a little longer than he takes. I glanced around at the others to see they were all still asleep. I stared for a minute at Sen as he was… snoring louder than I have heard from another dragon. I thought about waking them up to help me go and search for Saber, but then thought I could do it without them and let my friends sleep.

With my decision made; I got up and began to wonder around looking for Saber. Shortly after I set out, I caught his scent faintly as I went into different sections of the ruins. I could catch his scent in some parts stronger than others, but he had been all over in the ruins. It was quiet as I kept following what I could smell of Saber's scent. He had walked through much of the ruins; some were around places we had seen and had been shown as his scent said. Yet after following the trail for a while, Saber, scent led into an area that we had not been shown earlier. Strangely though, I the signs of my mate were faint, saying that he had been here, but had kept going… wherever he had been heading. After about what I think was an hour, I found nothing and my feelings of worry were rising, but I was not giving up in my search! Saber was here in this area and I will find him no matter what!

Well, as I have not found Saber anywhere around the ruins, it is probable that he might be outside of the ruins themselves. What I could not figure out; was in which direction he could have gone. He rarely just disappears… for long at least anyway! I kept searching for a long while. The next time I looked up to check the time of night, I saw that the moon was not too far from setting in the west. The dawn of the coming day was not far away; hours away maybe. I have still not seen or smelled any clue as to Saber's whereabouts are currently. I have only been able to tell where he has been and that was starting to scare me!

By this point, I began to look outside the valley for Saber, my mate. My worry was swiftly becoming terror and fear that I might not see Saber again, I was getting more frightened with the more time that passed by. I was seriously thinking about going back to the others to ask for their assistance on finding Saber. It was when I was about to turn back when I caught something in the light breeze that was present. It was a scent I knew; it was my mate's! It was fresh and that meant he is not far! It was coming from the forest below me, which was outside the valley; on the other side of the canyon behind the ruins.

I landed on the ground where the trees were thin and inhaled deeply to find out where Saber was by his scent. When I picked up his trail; I honed in on it, picking up my pace to hopefully sooth my nerves. I wanted to see Saber to comfort the worry in my mind. I know he is going through a lot, even if I do not know what he is experiencing. I have asked him to try and explain it to me, but the things he says just confuse me. I really think he needs to talk about what is bothering him. I want to be able to be there for him and for him to know that he can trust me. But Saber has shown that he does not like to do that… or rather it is more like he does not know how to open up to others.

Still with all that he is; I love him so much! Even with all the odd things Saber says or does that do not make sense… I assume that it comes from being in the human realm. I love him all the same. I want to help him and to be by his side for the rest of our lives!

I came into a hollow that beyond was what appeared to be a clearing and by the strength of his scent, Saber is in it ahead of me. I smiled with the expectation of being able to see Saber sitting and thinking or something like that as he tends to do when he is out on these… what did he call them? Strolls, I think? The word sounds interesting… even if I do not fully understand what it is supposed to mean. Once Saber and I have a talk about what is bothering him so much everything will be okay going forward… I hope.

I still thank my ancestors that I was fortunate enough to find a dragon like Saber to have as a mate! Not to mention how handsome he is, even if he does not flaunt it like some dragons do; actually that is one of the good qualities he has. I mean, Saber is very attractive and is graceful as well which just adds to his good looks. Yet, Saber is also humble, does not flaunt or boast of things he does; instead he says it was nothing out of the ordinary. The more I get to know him as the dragon he has become, the more I love him!

I saw a lot of plants underneath the trees ahead of me and beyond that was an open space that the trail of Saber's scent led. What a happy thought, I have almost found him! Maybe if it is just us and since we have the time, we could strengthen our bond. We haven't mated since that first… well, second time before going back to Warfang. I have wanted to do that again, but with Saber as troubled as he has been lately. I do not want to seem like a bother to him; so I have left him alone. Still, if we could mate again; that would be wonderful! Suddenly, there was a sound was heard in the night that scared me.

"RAHH!"

That snapped me out of my thought and facing forward from where the sound had come from. I ran the rest of the way to the plants that covered the path I was on that went into the clearing and I looked ahead. My smile instantly turned to a grimace of horror as I took in the scene before me. I saw Saber and he was pacing; he has done that before at times, but this is different than how he does it in the times before. He was pacing rather fast and his paws were hitting the ground hard. I kept staring on and noticed that he was shaking in a way… kind of like how he was before we mated the first time… that we can remember. It was then I got to see his face… I have only seen that type of face once… when we had the argument the day before we became mates. I will never be able to forget that expression.

"WHY WAS I SO STUPID?!"

I snapped back to attention as I locked my gaze on Saber as he yelled again. Stupid… what is Saber talking about?! Then I witnessed him begin to slam his body into anything he could find and use! I shook my head and came to a decision; I had to stop Saber. Whatever his reasons he is doing this to himself, he should not do so! Saber had been hurting himself for about a minutes while I had been coming to my decision, before I burst through the foliage and hit him, aiming for his back and once I got to where I wanted, I hugged Saber for dear life to stop him from hurting himself.

"Saber what are you doing?!"

He struggled against me, yet I held fast to him. The way he was acting was scared me! I was very worried about it as he was trying to hurt himself. Whatever his reasons were, they were wrong and he needed to stop! After a few minutes Saber stopped struggling under me. I heard a sigh from the dragon I loved under me.

"Lara… let go… of me!"

His voice sounded unlike himself as he is normally, so I ignored him as not too long ago he was hurting himself. I hugged him tighter. I was not going to let him do that again! And Saber has not given me any sign that he would not continue injuring himself, if I let him go!

"No, I will not!"

Saber Shook under me.

"LARA I SAID GET OFF OF ME!"

If Saber thinks that raising his voice and yelling at me will scare me into doing what he says; then he will be surprised! I am not just a dragoness with her appearance; I can be assertive when I see a need to be!

"I SAID NO, I WILL NOT LET GO IF YOU WILL JUST HURT YOURSELF!"

-Saber's POV-

"Saber what are you doing?!"

I didn't need her to speak to know it was Lara on my back. With her clinging onto me and holding me in such a way I couldn't move much at all, without falling that is, it's kind of hard not to know she was there. I could tell by the feel of her underbelly scales, which I have become very familiar with and her scent was also an obvious indication to her being here. I'm not surprised she found me; I'm wonder why she is here at this time of night more than anything, but her finding me is a foregone conclusion to me now. However… most of all… WHY IS IT SHE IS INTERRUPTING MY VENTING TIME!

I struggled against Lara; I didn't want be around her or deal with her. Not with me in the emotional state that I am right now! No one has seen me during a venting here in the dragon realm and I would rather keep it that way! After a minute I realized my struggles were futile as Lara wasn't letting go. I took a moment to breathe deeply in and out; finding the mental clarity to calm down a margin. This state of calm was temporary, I admit; but it was the best I could muster right now. It was amazing that I got even that much having been smack dang in the middle of a serious emotional venting… emotional ventings are a tad worse than a normal venting is, yet they take a great deal longer to get out! I sighed and tried to be nice and asked first. It would end far better for both of us, if Lara left by her own choice; granted it is unlikely that she will, but I can hope can't I?! I don't have my usual optimism at this moment… ancestors help me in this!

"Lara… let go… of me!"

I was barely able to control my voice as I was still extremely mad and emotional. I was still in the middle of a major emotional venting as I mentioned before; I really prefer not to be disturbed while I do such things until I'm finished… completely. Yet, I didn't want to hurt Lara as she had nothing to do with what had put me into this unstable state. I care about her so I don't want her to see me venting or get hurt by it… especially an emotional one like this is! I like to unload in peace and privacy as it goes much smoother for everyone, including me. However… like always, Lara didn't listen to me. No, her response was to stiffen her hold on me. Well, that doesn't help me in this current debacle! Is it too much for me to ask on my part, to be left alone with my misery… without anyone to interfere while I deal with it? I wouldn't think so!

"No, I will not!"

The little control I had on my emotions, which I had temporarily to try to convince Lara to leave; slipped and I lost myself once more. WHY ISN'T SHE LEAVING ME TO WALLOW IN MY OWN MISERY?!

"LARA I SAID GET OFF OF ME!"

Why won't she just give me the time and the space to deal with the things that happen to me?! I don't want anyone to see me like this. Lara specifically, she really doesn't need… actually, I will rephrase that; she shouldn't see me like this when I am venting and unloading… normal venting is bad enough, emotional ones are worse! WHY WON'T LARA LEAVE ME TO THIS?!

"I SAID NO, I WILL NOT LET GO IF YOU WILL JUST HURT YOURSELF!"

AAAAHHH! She frustrates me so at times like this! Can't she see… I'm in no state to be… around others right now?! … Her included in those others! What I do to deal with things and cope is my decision and business, to be handled by no one else but me as I see fit! Whether I wish to cause myself physical injury and pain or not; is my choice! It is for punishment that I feel is necessary! So why won't Lara leave me to do what I see is needed *sob* *sob*?! I struggled some more for a few minutes, but our positions didn't change. … This girl sometimes… she just… how does she get to me… this dragoness… gets on… my nerves… *unintelligible grunts and sound of anger and frustration ensue*! I fumed for a bit before I was able to calm down enough to see how this was going.

*Sigh* Okay, I get it… even I can see the 'writing on the wall'. Lara wasn't going to let go of me any time soon nor leave me alone for a while. She must see this as trying to help her mate a.k.a. me. Preventing me to use my normal methods of dealing with the problems I seem to acquire. It is not helping, but it is the thought that counts, isn't it? I could do without the thought for more, but… Lara wouldn't be herself if she didn't worry about me, would she? I exhaled heavily in defeated acceptance before I plopped down next to the pond where Lara and I had ended out at this point. I would have to finish this venting session later it would seem. I had calmed down a small margin, but though my anger had deflated to a degree; I was still mad. I had lost the interest and the compulsion to injure myself.

"Lara you mind getting off my back; it is good manners to face and see the one you talk to."

Lara didn't move for a moment after I said the comment I did. I waited as patiently as I could for a bit. When a few minutes had passed she got off my back and went down on her haunches on my right. My usual mental discipline and self-restraint had begun to reassert themselves and take charge. When that had happened, the rest of my hurt and horrible feelings started to drain away for the time being. I turned to face Lara who looked very worried about me.

"Saber why were you hurting yourself?!"

Well, direct and to the heart of the matter; that's Lara for you, I was learning this in the recent months that had past. Not to say I mind that kind of approach or attitude; I like it and prefer it, but in times like this it doesn't help. That's because I really don't want to talk about the subject that put me into this state or even admit it.

"Well… I was… contemplating difficult things. What are you doing out here at this time of night... I mean it is not too far from dawn… should you not be sleeping?"

"I could say the same about you and you are avoiding the question by being vague."

… This is what I get for having a smart life companion; Lara is able to prevent me from getting out of explanations she want. Oh the things I get to look forward to for a long time to come; yea for me! … Do I tell her? … Would she even believe me?! … I likely already seen as a crazy lunatic or a troublemaker by other dragons, so what the hell; why not!

"Saber, whatever it is; you can tell me."

As she said this line she rubbed her cheek against mine. I felt a shiver go through me followed by a desire that was fueled by a primal drive that had been making its presence known over the last few weeks; I WASN'T in the mood for right now! I easily pushed the draconic instincts away; slammed the door on them figuratively speaking and ignoring them entirely. It is scary at times as it is like Lara is reading my mind like is the case in this instance.

"You would not believe me, even if I did tell you Lara."

She leaned up against me and nuzzled my chin with her snout softly.

"I have believed everything you have told me so far. I may not know how you did some of it, but I still believe you. So tell me."

That threw me for a loop! I keep underestimating Lara it would seem. … Well no point in delaying this… idea then.

"Um… so then…"

Lara was giving me her full attention, while I was trying to think of how to explain what had happened to me in… now that I am contemplating on this; I have no idea how long I was in the Ethereal Archives. I looked above myself to see that dawn was nigh… but it had been early evening when I went for a walk and… I guess that does answer the question to an extent of how long I was in the Archives. I took a deep breath and began.

"For the last few nights…"

I started to tell her about the visions I had been having for the last few nights… multiple times a night. Going on to mention to Lara that I had begun to wonder when we arrived here at the ruins. If they weren't related in some way; the feelings of familiarity had, when we had gotten to the ruins made sure of that. I of course, gave a summary of my midnight stroll and then I went into the journey through the underground maze. I don't remember the complete route off the top of my head; nonetheless I believe I could get to that cave it I had to again.

I hesitated slightly before I mentioned that I had met Koren once more. That took Lara understandably by surprise; our friend, in her view disappeared fifteen years ago along with myself. The truth is Koren died all those years ago... in the effort of saving me by buying time for me to get away. I now know that he doesn't blame me for his death. That brought a small modicum of comfort and ease to my soul. To break the awkward silence that had settled when I had told Lara about the meeting of Koren, I kept going without really thinking how Lara would understand what the archives had been like. I continued on about what the Ethereal Archives looked like as Koren dragged me through some of it. I gave a brief description of some of the other beings I saw there in the Archives. Her response to many of the descriptions was an expression of confusion as I would assume she hasn't seen anything like elves and many of the others; so she had nothing to reference to, couldn't blame her.

I, then got into the part of this particular experience I wasn't... exactly happy with. No, that would be putting my feelings of what had occurred back in that study or whatever kind of room that Bahamut had been in mildly. The talk with Bahamut was okay… except for the majority of the subject that involved me and him! One could say that it could have gone so much better… The information on the Great War was intriguing and helpful. If only Bahamut hadn't started off the conversation with the unexpected and unknown emotional nuclear bomb he did… I don't know how things would have proceeded. I mean, I doubt anyone appreciates having what's a figuratively akin to a tactical nuke dropped into your lap! I certainly didn't! Anyways, still by to my telling of this tale…

"Wait, this white dragon looked like you?"

I thought about how to answer her question. Did Bahamut look like me? That depends on if I want to be honest and forth coming with said info… I can't say at the present moment. Technically yes, to an extent Bahamut did look like me or as he put it, I look like him. Given how many years that separate our ages, let that pass and there was a high possibility that I would likely look almost exactly like him. So much so that it would be uncanny. It was due to… unfortunately, apparent hereditary genes and features, I would look similar to him whether I wanted to or not! I don't right now! I would rather not say so out loud either, but Lara will most likely be insistent.

"Yes he did look rather a lot like me just older in age."

I happened to skip over the line that Bahamut said that irked me so much right now... I may have just decided to conveniently forget to mention the implication of him being my... possible sire. I summarized much of the information on the Great War; I didn't go into great detail. It was history that the dragon realm at this time has no idea about as no record exists that I know of. I finished up with my leaving the Archive with a little small talk with Koren.

I was silent after I had finished the tale. Lara appeared to be thinking over the story I had told her. I sighed at the ludicrousness of the things I have explained to Lara. If I were her, I would think I was off my rocker!

"So you saw Koren again?"

I nodded.

"Yes, a little hyper active, still he is ever my friend."

"… and this dragon Bahamut… you sound like you have a problem with him…"

If only she could understand my problems with the subject of parents and figures of the like! Can anyone blame or criticize me? I don't think so with Uncle Douche Bag as a standing example of the parental figure I have had to grow up with! Because of him I have grown to detest such an idea!

"Oh I do, just have not sorted it out fully."

I was surprised as Lara nuzzled the underside of my chin against my jawline. It was one of the little tokens of her affection for me.

"I believe you, though your story is unlike anything I have heard; I know you are not lying."

… Well I'll be darned! I have again underestimated Lara, more so than I have ever before! I have to wonder how on God's green earth or in the dragon realm as is the case, I got me such an amazing dragoness for a life mate, as I have many times and will likely keep doing so in the future. It doesn't make sense that I would get one in the first place and on the slim chance I would get a spouse… I would've never expected to get one like her in my wildest fantasies! I mean, finding a girl or female of any race that is like Lara comes once in a lifetime if you're extremely lucky! I'm not that lucky or have that kind of luck really at all. So I have a hard time fathoming why she would spare me a glance or I should say waste even a minute on someone like me. Yes I'm belittling myself; but if I'm honest with myself, I certainly don't deserve her… with all my faults and quirks that come with me. I could only stare at Lara.

"Okay… you are either very trusting or extremely gullible. I guess I should not complain with either reason. I am just grateful for you listening to me."

Ah, fault example number one, being blunt to the point of being rude and many times insulting. I expected Lara, like most of the others who I would say something along these line; to be offended. Yet, Lara merely smiled at me. I felt my heart speed up after skipping a beat. I was still getting use to that bodily reaction that happened when she smiled at me. I didn't know exactly why such reactions had started getting more frequent lately when I saw Lara… along with other… less mentionable things coming to mind too. I shook my head to clear my head of the thoughts that was clearly from my instincts.

"I think trusting is a good way to say it Saber."

… And Lara just shrugs off my blunt manner of speaking; that's rather rare for me to receive. She really is something else; I'll give Lara that. Most others I am around are put off or insulted by my bluntness and manner of speaking… actually they take offense more often than not. However, Lara doesn't have a problem with the manner of speech I use and the way I see things. In fact, Lara's response after she had made the reply about trust; she had already snuggled against me by now and she somehow closer than she already was. It felt like Lara was glued to me before she had cuddled closer to me!

… Now I'm not against this… closeness to someone… especially Lara; it's just the change in the air that worries me. It might just be me but the atmosphere really feels like it has changed from a somewhat friendly to a romantic one in a short time period? I looked up at the sky that was beginning to brighten with dawn's approach imminent. The urges from before return once again and they were stronger than it was the last time and far more insistent!

… *Sigh* can anyone blame a guy like me for having such thoughts and urges as I was having right now? I mean come on! I have a gorgeous dragoness cuddling up against me; perhaps she isn't meaning to tempt me, but she is! What heathy warm-blooded male wouldn't have fantasies of getting it on with her and mate right here and now?! I would state for the record; I am a healthy warm blooded male whether I'm a dragon or human. I may not come off like that in the view of others, but I am one. I have a sex drive just as all males do; it's in the nature of living beings. The difference from other males and myself; I can control and restrain those urges and the drive that when there is a reason to. In other words, I am not ruled, led, driven or controlled by my libido or lust! The difficulty in this is I haven't had an active interest, so my sex drive hasn't come up, until a few weeks ago; since then, my libido has been trying to get me to do things with a vengeance! I won't allow that urge take over me!

Back to the matter at paw, Lara was prostrating herself against me, almost on top of me and she was gently using her body to caressing my own! She was practically begging me to mate without voicing it! It was fueling my sex drive to new levels! If that wasn't temptation enough to drive me mad with desire, her scent made it much harder to resist the urges to get it on with her, I get those with her sometimes! Lara's natural scent was still something I couldn't understand why it affected me as much as it did.

It was a mixture of vanilla, cherries and a hint of a smell of a flower that I had been around at the dojo. Master Kai had a tree in the yard of the dojo that was unlike any tree I have ever seen. The tree from about three feet from the base of its trunk twisted to the side and then grew in a near perfect circular arc, until it made a three hundred and sixty degree circle. Then it put out branches and on those branches grew amazing white flowers. The flowers had a smell that was pleasant and gave me a feeling of peace and serenity. Still haven't gotten Master Kai to tell me where he got the seed for this tree, though I wonder. So Lara's scent was something I couldn't ignore without great effort! It smelled amazing to me! This was increasing the strength of my libido, which Lara seemed to affect.

It isn't like Lara would be opposed to mating with me. She would be all for it, if I brought the question up! … Wait, I've a thought on this. Technically she is my mate, so what is the issue in this?! There is nothing wrong with me wanting to spend time… intimately bonding with Lara; so why am I against this?! In fact, as we are a 'couple' and by draconic cultural practice compared to human standards; we are as good as 'married' and so can enjoy all the rights and benefits that come with such a position. So spending time alone together and making each other happy is a natural thing to do right? I don't know much really about this kind of thing other than what I have heard and read. But in theory, we have to get to know one another better to become more intimate; physically, mentally and emotionally. Not so interested in the last of the three, right this moment; but that is the package. Who knows? Perhaps the activity of mating will help relieve the emotional stress I acquired from the Archives. Yes, I already felt the liquid miasma that was my instincts pulling me down; yet right now… I don't care enough to fight it. I rubbed my head on the top of Lara's to get her attention.

"Hey Lara… as it is just you and me right now. I was thinking that… well, we have not had the opportunity like this one except at night for the last few weeks. We have both been tired by that time and so we tend to go right to sleep."

Lara looked at me with a shocked expression; like she couldn't believe I was asking something like this of her. I was having a hard time believing I was asking this, but that's how it is. I sighed; apparently I would have to say this straight out. Not my normal style, but that's how it goes some times.

"What I mean to say… is… as we find ourselves in this position… *sigh* am I really going to say this out loud? … Do you… want to… um…"

I was struggling on getting out what was on my mind. Nevertheless, I think many guys have a hard time asking their significant other if they want to do an activity that you don't… you shouldn't do around others, out of a matter of decency and curtesy! I may be old fashion, but I see nothing wrong with that!

"Do you want… to… deepen our bond… by mating?"

Well I said it! … But what if she isn't up for it? I don't want to push this if she isn't! That would be ungentlemanly of me.

"I mean if you are not up to it right now… I can completely understand and that is fine. It is just… The last time was before we found Sen, so I thought…"

I was silenced by Lara's lips pushing against mine. I'll take that as a Hell Yeah! Note to self, SCORE! After a long minute our lips parted. Lara then leaned in and whispered into my ear.

"Of course I would wish to mate with you. I love you, more than anything else. I am happy being with you. So, shall we get to it?"

… You know, I get the feeling that she had something like this planned from the start! Perhaps not the method of getting to the point of me asking her if she wanted to mate, but I suspect she had mating in mind before finding me. I have been played and played well, I admit it! She can be cunning when she wants to be, I just happen to serve as the motivation factor for her. Lara is good! I can't say I will likely be unsatisfied with how this activity will go if the last experience is anything to go by! I sure picked a winner for myself! I swallowed and prepared for the plunge.

"Let's get busy then!"

A/n

Again I see no reason to write a lemon as in my view; it doesn't move the story along. So those with a need to have dirty scenes… you will find none here! Move along!

After I had gotten my breathing rate back to a calm pace, though it was still deep and long; I glanced over at Lara.

"So… did I perform up to your expectations, Lara?"

Lara took up her 'normal' position that she does when she cuddles against me. The said arrangement was her snuggling the majority of her body against my front and placing her head just under my jaw. That's how she lays against me or rather that is her preferred way to do so. I will say that when Lara does cuddle up to me like that… it is pretty dang comfortable. She sighed contentedly as she got settled comfortably into her cuddling position.

"More than performed up to them… you outdid them… mmm... I love you."

I felt the nice pull on my heart strings at the last three words Lara had said. I secured her in an embrace with my forepaws going around her shoulders. I leaned us back to lay against one of the trees by the pond; spreading my wings and encircling Lara with them, covering her with them like one might a blanket in bed. How we got there with all the moving we did; I will never know! I was more concentrating on enjoying the feeling of contentment I was having as I hugged Lara; a feeling that I was still getting used to.

I have found since gaining Lara as my mate; that she is very huggable. Or rather it feels nice to hug her to me, especially if it is against my body. … However, I have no real frame of reference to compare this to; never got to do anything of that sort in my life until recently. This feeling of contentment I have been getting; has increased in strength over the short few weeks by degrees. Still, I was so tired… I think we both were. Whatever worries or woes were to come; they could wait for now. We fell asleep in one another's embrace and drifted off to the realm of dreams and impossible things. I for the first time in a very long while didn't see memories of others, but slept peacefully.

-Scene Change-

I cracked my eyes open and squinted with the light coming down; filtered as it was by the leaves of the tree I was under. At the moment I was trying to process where I was and why. I began to go over what had happened last night. I blinked and opened my eyes to their normal amount. It took a minute for me to recall my experience of the previous night and the following… amazing high that Lara and I got to. I glanced up at the sky to figure the time of day that it was currently.

The sun was up now though it wasn't noon yet; so we had slept through the early morning then. I became aware of a source of warmth that covered my front. I flicked my gaze downward after tilting my head to get a view and what a wonderful sight I got! Laying there on my chest and underbelly was a vision of beauty; I'm of course referring to Lara. She was still snuggled against me and appeared to be very comfortable where she was. Her head was slightly lower than where she placed it before, though she was still on the upper section of my neck. I still had my wings wrapped around her back, preventing her from breaking our embrace accidentally.

I laid there for a few minutes basking in the sunlight and the warmth I was feeling from Lara who was still fast asleep. She is… cute when she is sleeping… Did I really just… never mind. However, I knew we couldn't stay like this for all that much longer; our other friends would worry and would start searching for us. I stretched and shifted hoping that my movement would wakeup Lara. Thankfully my movements had the desired effect; Lara began to stir and awaken. It was then I had an amusing idea, which I immediately put into action. I lowered my chin to my neck and then my tongue darted out and gave a long smooth stroke. That stroke went from Lara's top lip upward between her nostrils continuing to end between her eyes that were unopened. I retracted my tongue back into my maw and gained a smirk. My actions did what I wanted to as Lara instantly snapped up and alert; her eyes wide open and staring at me.

"Good morning Lara, are you awake now?"

"W-why did you do that?!"

I shrugged slightly.

"It seemed the best and quickest way to get you up and I thought you would enjoy it; am I right?"

I opened my wings, and then retracted and folded them to my back. Lara though reluctant at first, after a half a minute picked herself up and got off of me. When she had I got to my paws did a quick check of my muscles and seeing they were fine, took a few steps forward.

"So shall we get back to the ruins, to quell the fears of our friends of course?"

Chapter end

A/n

I debated whether I should go to this point or go to when Saber and the rest get back to Warfang. I think it just leaves off at a good note where I ended at the moment. You liked the chapter? Follow the story, favorite it or… my personal preference, write a review. It doesn't need to be long though I like those as they give me good ways to improve.

Okay serious note now! I am issuing a challenge to you readers! Yes, I need a particular kind of 'oc' that I am not the best at designing. … *drumroll* I need me (forgive the language as I rarely use foul language without censoring) a Bastard! In other terms I want a character that is a snobbish asshole and flaunts it with pride but is still, likable by most! Someone who is such a covert son of a bitch that Saber can't ignore it, aka a complete freaking douchebag! One of those kind of guys that to most of the characters around them appears to be a nice and upstanding guy, though to the main character and some others is… well… a bastard an asshole, a douchebag; don't know how to be any clearer. In short this character will end out being a rival to Saber. There are a few things I will need to be specific on this character I will require and will have on the form to make this character.

Name:

Race: Dragon (currently, if you want to have him to be a different race then give a short explanation as to how he became a dragon)

Age: (between 18 and 21)

Gender: Male

Height:

Length: (remember to have this measure 11 to sixteen inches more than the height)

Build: (if it is different than average)

Eye color:

Body Color: (Scales and underbelly for dragons; fur color and pattern for cheetahs as examples)

Appearance:

(for dragons; horns, tail blades or/and anything else about them of note)

(For others clothing if applicable, or any feature of note)

Personality: To most he is… respectable; To Saber he is a total Bastard; (Some other basic traits that make them who they are)

Skills/element(s): (things they do well; I don't know how else to say it)

Other: (Anything else of note about them)

Reviews are in the reverse order in which I received them.

Torchstar

Element would fall under Skills; thank you for bring that up.

Draconet

I have accomplished my aim then if that is your view.

HolyCorss9

Yes to an extent, though I like the name in general.

Guest

Glad you liked it. I hope that I can keep up that level of work.

Guest

… well. I like the idea, but correct me if I'm wrong; with the personality... it feels like you kind of took parts from Saber and Sen and put them together. So you might want to look at the personality and do some polishing. I mean for instance, 'tells jokes that others won't understand'; in what way would they not be understood? Does he do really bad puns or something? Is it due to the culture he is a part of like Sen? Another would be, 'he doesn't snap or get angry easily'; why? Is it due to conditioning like Saber and if so what reason was that needed? If it is natural for him then what kind of tolerance does he have or what triggers the snap to occur? It is things like that I would question; I have found that with character design, it is all in the smaller details that affect the big things that make a character lovable and believable.

ArcticDragon Rider

Glad you enjoyed the chapter and hoped you like this one as much.