How the Lunatic Found Love... and almost died for it.

In which Furno Moxley goes out his way to woo "The War Queen" Rayleen Barnett. Title says it all, though. Based on some conversations I had with JJ and Lucha Warrior

Since the divorce, Furno Moxley has been in an all time low when it came to romance. Nyx was quick to move on to Jack Cunningham of Cobra Club, but then there was a certain someone who distracted the Ohioan so much he kept forgetting stuff he was supposed to do with the roster like plan spots for matches.

The War Queen, Rayleen Barnett.

Literally, out of all the women he fancied, she was the only one who didn't budge to his affections.

He needed help...

"Hello?" Furno is shown knocking on Seth Sullivan's hotel room door. No response from the Gravedigger. He knocks again, then just opens the door. The room is really dark, until a lamp suddenly turns on, revealing the Cobra Club leader, sipping tea.

"I've been expecting you." he says.

"Aiden told me that you knew Rayleen before." Furno starts.

"Which Aiden?"

"Black."

"Okay. Anyway, yes, I trained her. Have a seat."

Reluctantly, Furno sits on a chair near Seth's bed and even pours himself some tea.

"So, how's that going?" Seth asks.

"Every single thing I tried, shot down." Furno groans. "Flowers? I get an Ankle Lock. Chocolate? Instant Sleeper Hold. An arm around her neck? Tries to rip my arm off."

"I know what's going on. You're going full Furno."

Furno tilts his head in confusion. "Huh?"

"It means you're being too direct and straightforward." Seth explains. "Kinda like that one guy in Brooklyn 99."

"I... I guess... On a random side note, on a scale of one to ten, how fucked am I in the ring with her dad?"

Seth blinks twice. "Seriously?"

"Ten, right?" Furno asks.

"More like ten times ten."

"Hmm... I'll take my chances.

(Two days later...)

Seth is flabbergasted when Furno comes back to the hotel room, ice pack on his head, bleeding, and bandaged.

"That was fun." he says weakly.

"How much teeth did you lose?" the Gravedigger asks.

"Still have all of them, though he almost crushed my skull." Furno smiles like a buffoon.

Someone suddenly walks into the room. It was Nyx Rosewood.

"Furno, Jack and I ar- WHAT THE FUCK?! WHY ARE YOU SO BLOODY?!" she screams.

"He went up against Rayleen's dad in an MMA fight. We all know how that's gonna end." Seth explains. The Mad Angel facepalms.

"Furno, I'm sure this is because you were successful in wooing the first three girls you were with, which were Noelle, Nikki, and I. The difference between us and Rayleen is that we are open to relationships. Rayleen is that one girl who's shy around the thought of being in a relationship. Instead of being too direct or letting your ass be whooped in a fight, why not be honest with her and ask what she thinks?" she suggests.

"Yeah... what she said." the Gravedigger agrees.

"I would... but I'm sore as hell." Furno groans. "By the way, I still have this." he hands Nyx a poorly crafted love letter. "Was going to give that before my doom, but never did."

Nyx, confused, goes ahead and reads the letter. A minute later...

"Shakespearean sonnet and you sound like an angsty teenager. What is this? A suicide note?"

"Let me see." Seth swipes the letter off Nyx's hands and reads it himself. He bursts out laughing and clapping afterwards.

"Y'know what," Furno swipes the letter off Seth's hands. "-I'll go give it to her myself."

He walks out of the room, ice pack and all.

WFA Gym...

We see Rayleen Barnett, hitting a sandbag with some stiff kicks while working out alongside other WFA wrestlers. Afterwards, she wipes herself with a towel. Furno suddenly walks in the gym, alerting the War Queen. Rayleen is about to get in a fighting stance only to see the Ohioan's ice pack and bloody bandages.

"What the hell happened to you?" she asks.

"I... may or may not have battled your dad in an octagon." he replies.

"Why would you do that?!" Rayleen exclaims. "He would've killed you!"

"I tried to be cool around him, okay?" Furno retorts. "I tried to be cool in your eyes by getting into the shit you love. And apparently, it almost killed me."

Rayleen facepalms. "You don't have to get into the stuff I like just to be cool in my perspective. You're already cool enough as this lunatic with a shit eating grin."

Furno blinks twice at her statement. "You think I'm cool because I'm a crazy bastard?"

"...Yeah..."

"...Thanks..." Furno grins a little. "By the way, here..." he hands Rayleen the letter. She raises an eyebrow at how it looks.

"What is this? A kindergarten project?" the War Queen asks incredulously.

"Just read it."

Rolling her eyes, Rayleen opens the letter and reads the sonnet.

"I'm surprised you even know what a sonnet is, let alone how to write one." she remarks.

"Internet." Furno adds.

"Hmm... flattering... I'll accept this..."

"Do I get an A for effort?"

Rayleen just walks up to Furno and quickly hugs him, much to his surprise (and slight pain from the bandaged parts of his body).

"That good enough for you?" Rayleen asks.

"Okay... thanks..."

With that, Furno leaves the gym as Angelica Rhodes walks up to Rayleen.

"At least it didn't end with you trying to rip his limb off." the American Princess tells her. "Did you really mean it when you said he was cool?"

"I actually did." the War Queen replies.

"Don't tell me you're into the guy who's been wooing you for the past couple of weeks..."

"Maybe..."

Later...

"How'd it go?" Seth asks.

"She accepted it, gave me a hug. Done." Furno replies, making the Baltimore native facepalm.

"Are you trying to put yourself in the friendzone?"

Furno shrugs. "Maybe I was in over my head, pursuing her affections."

"Kinda, but can't blame a man for trying." Seth replies.

"Question, you think she's hiding something from people? Like... secret feelings for someone that she's too shy to admit?"

"At first, yeah it was difficult for her to cope with "feelings," but I assume as she got older she began to have no feelings what so ever."

"I'm no scientist, but isn't that the time where a person longs for a partner?"

"Unless your last name is "Barnett.""

"Well'p, maybe she's hiding shit from us, and that's my conclusion. See ya around." He stands up and is about to walk out of the room and stops. "By the way, have you ever... loved Rayleen by any chance back in the day?" Furno asks again.

"Nah, I just helped train her." Seth replies.

"Cool." Furno walks out the doorway.

"...But we did make out a bit in the back of the Dojo."

"Wait, wha-"

"Just kidding. If I did, I wouldn't be alive." Seth tells him as the lamp turns off and the door closes on Furno's face.

"...True."