DnD: The story no one knew about

by Katie Woods

What will the poor wizard do? With a thieving elf, an ice mage who can't handle the cold, a Dragonborn too kind to fight, a dwarf with anger management issues that could make the best therapist quit, and two lovebirds that could give anyone a headache, how will this wizard save the one family she has ever known?

2. Chapter 2

Hey, so um...the story from before was an old campaign that I was in a while ago but we all broke up because of personal issues and I joined a new group. So um yeah...THIS IS THE STORY NO ONE KNOWS MARK TWO

Now, this is a real DnD group I have joined and I will introduce our characters or at least the ones I can remember so far because I am still fairly new to this group and we've just kinda gotten started. So yeah.

First up we have Ashanti Paige Book, a...decent(?) little elf with a mysterious past literally no one in the group knows about(they do know just that their characters don't know). Ashanti isn't even her actual name, it's a fake name she made up so no one could figure out her true identity. She's very smart but she's also not(you know, like those people who know sh*t about stuff but not the full thing). She's actually a very funloving character and loves her mates and wants to keep them safe no matter what! But she is useless in elf populated villages(where the population is elf dominat or just full elf). She gets so nervous that she poofs away into the shadows(and if I can't during my turn I wait until the next one to try again).

Next, we have Dad(yes that's his name). He's a wizard(or cleric I forgot) who is pretty good at what he does. He's very calm and collective at times too. He made a dad-joke once to these goblin guards where he went 'knock knock' and the guard went 'who's there' and he left.

Next up is E.B. (or Elf Boy), he's one of our bards who is...okay. He's new like me so we're both kind of learning the ropes with this new group and E.B. is learning the ropes(his player is new to DnD). He's a very funny guy and has no idea what to do at times(or at all). He tried to play Smash Mouth for the goblin guards from before(the ones Dad told his joke to) but...that didn't go so well.

Next is our other bard, he has ideas but...they don't work out so we tend to just go 'I'm listening but no'. Like these are seriously bad ideas he comes up with on the fly. We tried to follow one once and it took us most of the campaign to get anything done before we killed it. We ended up shooting, stabbing, poisoning and throwing a javelin straight through the chest at each other. Our cleric Fluffy cut his strings once but we soon regretted that because we needed a little ditty only he could play because E.B. wasn't there.

Now for Fluffy, our cleric. He's a chill guy but is violent to our poor bard whose name I can never remember. He's normally very serious but we're all a bunch of idiots so the seriousness doesn't last. He shot one of us at one point when he rolled into a river and tried to get this goblin we fought.

Our barbarian is a very violent dude too but I'm not so sure if it's bad luck with throws and our DM is evil or he does it on purpose. He once shot a javelin straight through our bard's chest just to shut him up. I try not to provoke him because I don't have a high amount of hit points and I'm pretty sure if you slap me I'll die.

We have another member but he's not very vocal or there much so I don't know much about him or his character. We have another member who is jokingly Ashanti's wife but I'll get to her next time.