Prince of Heart- After the rant last chapter, (and a little bit of a personal revelation where I basically said I'm completely emotionally unstable) I'll keep this short and sweet: I will never accept any other fact other than Eridan being really fucking short.

"No way!" Vriska told Eridan, turning around to face him. The two stood in the middle of a large ship, recently conquered by the caliginous couple after a short naval battle in the middle of the Alternian Ocean. The battle hadn't taken long for the two, though that was no surprise; after they had found their ancestors belongings just days before, they had been unstoppable in their FLARPing conquests, especially with Eridan's newfound rifle. It had quite easily pierced the vessels wooden hull, with the two throwing hooks onto the mast and railings to keep the ship from sinking and the inhabitants drowning in the harsh waters.

The two had quickly boarded, rounding up the three trolls on the ship- a boy, and two girls –and tying them together in the middle of the deck, then proceeding to steal all the gold and divvy it up between the two. Now the two stood above the prisoners, squabbling between themselves as the waves crashed against the ship and the cloudy skies threatened rain at any moment.

"wwhat do you mean 'no wway?'" Eridan argued. Along with the weapon, he had found his ancestors clothing, which he had immediately recreated and donned with haste. The outfit was fairly swanky: a sleeveless black shirt with his sign on it with an equally long-sleeved violet overcoat over it, a pair of striped black and violet pants, black boots, and heavily complemented by his purple, flared cape.

"I mean no. Fucking. Way!" Vriska reaffirmed. Like Eridan, she was equally as dressed up, also decked in a costume replica of her ancestors clothing. She wore a grey T-shirt with her sign, denim jeans with red boots, and a completely cerulean un-buttoned overcoat. She had managed to tear herself away from her normal FLARPing partner to raid the seas with her new-found Kismesis Eridan, which the pair had been doing for three days straight. "These are my prisoners, I need them for my lusus!"

Eridan scoffed, bearing his pointy teeth, "you alwways get them though!" Eridan stomped his foot onto the wooden deck, creating a soft thump. "wwhy cant i take just one?"

"8ecause you always take their lusi for your little Moirail!" Her frown turned to a condescending smile, and she laid a finger on Eridan's chest. "I know a8out the little red crush you got on her, it's painfully o8vious."

Eridan slapped her hand away. "wwho i havve red feelings for is none of your concern! dont change the subject, vvris. youvve got enough trolls to feed that dumb lusus for weeks!"

"Why would you even want them Eridan? What the hell would you do with them?"

"force them to wwalk the plank! havve a little fuckin fun!"

"That's it?" Vriska sounded almost hurt at the statement, though it was hard to tell if she actually was or was just over-dramatizing like she usually did. "I thought we were having fun."

Eridan wiped his face with one hand. "I didnt mean it like that, i swwear. im just tired of you alwways dictatin our advventures."

Vriska chuckled, playfully flicking her long, wavy, messy hair. "Well may8e you should try 8eing dominant instead of following everything a lowly 8lue 8lood says. You can't 8lame me for your secret su8missive side."

"you better wwipe that stupid grin off your face before I do it myself!"

"oh my GOD!" One of their prisoners complained; a sapphire blooded male of a scrawny body, and with a pirate hat covering his slicked back hair. "w!ll you two just throw us off th!s sh!p so ! don't have to l!sten to your !nfernal squabbl!ng."

"La-me-o-n!" The chubby mint blooded girl beside him pleaded, the eyepatch covering her one eye and wrapped around her half shaven head. "Do-nt a-nger the-m fu-rthe-r!"

"oh yeah, yureen, because be!ng n!ce to the deadly pirates !s gonna conv!nce them to LET US GO!"

"what's happenin?" The last ruby red blooded girl asked, her short stature and pigtailed hair not adorned by any pirate gear. "turn me ar()und, i wanna see!"

"Oh my god, how rude!" Vriska exclaimed, sauntering up to the trio with an exaggerated hip sway to frustrate Eridan. She grabbed a hold of the mint blooded girls chin, lifting her head up to face her. "As you can see, me and my douche of a 8oyfriend are having a little… de8ate as to what to do with you guys. If you could may8e, I don't know, shut the fuck up while we sort it out, that'd 8e juuuuuuuust swell!"

"wwell fuck vvris, maybe youd like to just let them go? just fuckin kill one of them to provve howw fearsome wwe are."

Vriska rolled her eyes, and cocked her head to face Eridan. "My lusus doesn't like them cold."

"i d()n't like y()u c()ld!" The ruby blood called out.

"fucking got her, muthur. keep !t up and they m!ght put me out of my misery."

"see, theyre talkin shit about us! make them wwalk the plank."

Vriska groaned, letting go of the girls chin and beginning to walk over to Eridan. "How a8out, you stop telling me what to do!"

Vriska stopped right in front of him, crossing her arms as she waited for an answer. "then dont call me fuckin submissivve."

"I'll call you whatever the hell I want, 'Dualscar'."

Eridan pushed the spider girl, harder than he intended to, and she stumbled back, but managed to keep herself from tripping over. She regained her stance, and pushed him back, even harder than he had her. Eridan grew angry, and replied with a jab into her ribs, which sparked the two into full-blown wrestling. Vriska grabbed onto Eridan after pulling his cape over his head, and used all her strength to throw him across the deck, eventually sliding to a stop when he hit the wall. He quickly, and unsuccessfully, tried to get up before Vriska could make it over to him, but Vriska's athletic figure made quick work of the distance between the two. Just as Eridan got to his knees, Vriska grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him up against the wall, using both arms to pin him by the neck.

She smirked at him, a very triumphant smirk that Eridan always hated, and poked her cerulean tongue out between her equally cerulean lips. Eridan made a low growling noise, and prepared to wrestle out of the two inch taller trolls grasp, but before he could, she leaned her head down and began to kiss him on the lips. Eridan, initially caught off-guard, felt the aggressiveness of the action, and returned it, and the two continually tried to out-kiss each other.

"A-wwww!" The mint blood sighed.

"what the fuck do you mean 'awwww?'" The sapphire exclaimed.

"we-ll, lo-o-k how a-do-ra-ble- the-y a-re-, wi-th the-i-r li-ttle- Ki-sme-ssi-tu-de-."

"yep, totally. glad we get to watch them make out before we d!e. d!nner and a show, ! guess. but the d!nner !s us getting murdered because SOMEONE wanted to go ra!d!ng for p!rate loot, MURTHUR!"

"h()w hard are they g()in at it? why can't i watch them make ()ut. especially the cute blue bl()()d."

"dont be gross, murthur."

"argh!" Eridan cried out, pushing Vriska away in a fit of anger. He placed his hand to his lips, and pulled it in front of him to reveal a stain of violet blood. "you bitch, you bit me!"

Vriska shrugged. "All's fair in love and war."

"wweird. i feel like youvve said that before?" Eridan shook his hand a couple of times to get the wet blood off.

"Really now?" Vriska asked, surprising undramatically.

"yeah, like a wweird case of de je vu." Eridan rubbed his forehead in frustration. "like… ivve done this before. we captured these pathetic land dwwellers, and then wwe started makin out, then you took them after I went to wwipe my lip of blood on my ship." Eridan narrowed his eyes, and pointed an arm at her. "you… you broke up wwith me. i remember now. you broke up wwith me. wwhat the hell is going on here?"

Vriska smiled sweetly, an unusual sight for her, and she chuckled slightly, "I was wondering when you would come to."

Eridan watched as, almost instantaneously, Vriska was switched out for a similar looking girl, her athletic and taller figure changed into a shorter and curvier one. Her long, messy hair had been exchanged for shoulder length, wavy hair, and her normally rounded glasses had been replaced by ones with pointed ends. Her clothes, formerly pirate like, now consisted of a cerulean blue dress that reached just below the girl's thighs, showing off her thick legs, with a black belt tightened around her waist. The outfit bottomed off with long white socks and black dress shoes, and the entire get up made the troll look quite attractive. But the freakiest thing about her, was her completely blank eyes, which didn't allow Eridan to gauge where she was looking, much like Terezi.

The girl perked up, her height now equalled to Eridan, and she crossed her arms behind her. "It's a pleasure to meet you finally, Eridan. My name is Aranea."