Chapter Four
"WHAT IT MEANS TO BE A GUARDIAN"
As my body leaned back against a large boulder, keeping watch over the sleeping survivors in their tents, my eyes couldn't help but lift to the stars above. There were so many, painting, illuminating the galaxy.
It is hard to believe all those little dots are planets and suns with more hidden planets around them. A vast universe with life and territory that still remains uncharted, belonging to darkness and perhaps little light.
It was strange, thinking like this without the whispers of said Celestial's conquering my mind and perceptions. I was relaxed, free to astonish and gape at the world's beauty.
The night was silent, minions of the darkness no where to be seen, yet my right hand held tightly to the scout rifle I found upon scavenging through an abandoned camp for supplies. My body was exhausted, for I haven't rested since we left the city, which was approximately two weeks ago, maybe more. I needed rest. I no longer had the Traveler's light to heal said exhaustion upon my command. The thing is, I could, for we have not ran into any harmful enemy's since day two of travel when we were hunted and I had to fight off a pack of Red Legion mercenaries and hounds. Every once in a while, I would spot a Devil or two, but they never approached, only fled, knowing of their disadvantage in numbers and they were still terrorized by Ghaul's invasion on Earth. And I never harmed them either. There was no need to if they had no harmful intentions.
The Fallen and my group, we were both survivors. And in that period of recovery, there was no reason for combat, we both knew that. So we carried on.
My eyes soon faced back forward, gazing into the heat of the fire I sat near. For a moment, I sat my rifle down and leaned forward, extending my hands to feel the heat, hoping it would radiate through the rest of my frame. I was so cold, a feeling I was not used to and have no memory of ever experiencing before. All I knew was solar from my Gunslinger aptitude. With such warmth, I could effortlessly survive in the cold of Northern Old Russia, yet suffered in the scorching heat of the summer. Pros and cons, I suppose.
There was a broadcast that sent coordinates of some camp called "The Farm" to all living ghosts, so right now, that was where we were heading. The journey has been hard, for all the survivors are humans who have human needs. They need food, water, and require stops to rest. It was as if I spent more time searching for these things for them rather than actually leading them to this Farm. There was also that newborn, but luckily, there was a woman in the group that could breastfeed and care for it. It was hard, yes, but we were managing okay. The civilians had more strength than I thought. Then again, when I was a guardian, I never had the chance to actually venture through the city and interview and chat with some of them to learn of their lifestyles or see how they were doing. I was too busy completing missions, bounties or patrols. I stayed active.
Everything that we worked so hard to build was destroyed in one day. The City evolved tremendously, from mere tents to solid walls and skyscrapers. Life was normal, safe, and the children slept soundly at night without fear.
That was so long ago, when the Titans rose the first wall. About two-hundred years ago if I had to estimate, I don't know. More or less.
I am old, after all. Ancient to modern society. Yet, my legs still hold immense strength to carry forward. I wasn't as strong as I was all those years ago when I fought for the city. I could be, I don't know if it's because of my loss of the Guardian title or that I just don't have motivation anymore. I'm old news. The Celestial Nighthawk is dead in the eyes of modern humanity. History. Has been for, what, twenty-four years now? Twenty-five? Six? How long ago was I exiled?
My hand raised to pinch the bridge of my nose. I couldn't remember anymore. My memory, and brain in general was a lost cause, damaged, scorched by the bird from using it for all these years.
All anyone cares for anymore is the guardians resurrected around the time of the Black Garden incident. The one's who slain Crota and Oryx, who put an end to SIVA.
No one remembered the infamous Gunslinger who wielded the venerated Celestial Nighthawk, the only one since the Collapse. No one remembers the war hero who saved hundreds of civilian lives in the Battle of Six Fronts. No one knows Ren, a member of the Six Coyotes who was among the first to scout the Cosmodrome or who escorted thousands of refugees to the city. No one remembers the brave hunter who followed and endorsed Shaxx's decision to attack in the dire last-second moment of Twilight Gap.
The Guardian who signed off on the Faction Accords alongside Andal Brask.
The Guardian who fought in the Battle of Burning Lake, and being among the first to discover the Hive species.
No one remember's the Guardian who launched the audacious offense on the moon, precipitating The Great Disaster, no matter their failure.
Or the Guardian who was among the six who killed the last Ahamkara in the Great Ahamkara Hunt.
It didn't matter what all I have done.
I was dust in the Last City's history books, crammed between thin pages.
No matter my accomplishments or sacrifices for that wretched city, the amazing Commander Zavala proceeded the make the decision to exile me. And no one knew why. Not truly. Only him and I know the real reason he sent me away.
I hated myself for loving someone like him. He is no leader, but a coward in a mask.
So, why do I think of him as I stare into this dreary fire, desperate for warmth? My hands shook with immense fraught as my eyelids lay half-closed, features holding nothing. No emotion.
Will I ever be accepted? I couldn't help but think as my eyes drooped more.
My body shifted, and upon hearing a soft reverberation of the Nighthawk mask, my concentration altered. I moved to take hold of the skull, unclasping it from the chain on my waist and raising it in front of me for scrutinizing. My thighs were bent to touch my chest in the tight sitting position, chin being set on my knees as I stared.
Holding it with my left, my right hand caressed the hard texture and material that made up the shell. So many scars were forever etched into the framework, telling its history of war. The fire and red in the background shown through the eyes, naturally setting the picture of its true, menacing appearance. A shiver roved up my spine.
"You're her, aren't you?"
The sudden vocalization precipitated an extortionate flinch to radiate through me. In a hurry, I descended the mask of the helmet and shoved it beside me, extending my legs and removing myself from the weak position.
A child, a young human boy, exited his tent and stood. I stared at him, head tilted.
"The Celestial Nighthawk. I've studied so much about you, even outside of school." They mention my name in schools?
My eyes widened at the child. He approached and sat beside me by the fire, back against the rock. His expression was dissimilar compared to his astonished statement. His eyes held sadness, frown formed on his lips as he looked down, I did as well, not saying a word in response. My actions indirectly confirmed his assumption.
This child wasn't too young, but he wasn't that old either, it was surprising he knew who I was. Not even modern civilian elders know or care to know about someone like me. They are too busy focusing on their own lives.
"They don't talk about our history much, but those who do thought you abandoned us or were... dead." My eyes raised to the boy again. No matter his age, he held a strong vibe of intelligence and care for the City and it's history. Suddenly, his eyes moved and lit up with joy, smile coming to his features. He pointed at the mask on the ground. "Can I...?" He couldn't even finish his question, so much exhilaration was surging through him, but I knew what he wanted.
Raising my right hand, I extended it beside me, picking the bird up, and handing it to the boy.
The lack of weight seemed to surprise him, but his delight remained evident as he traced his fingers over the skeleton. But eventually, his smile faded. "The only one of its kind... I've heard so much about it... and it's dead..." My eyebrows furrowed at his words. How could he be so upset about this? Does he not acknowledge the damage it brings to those around it? To it's wielder? No matter the good it brings.
What I didn't know was that it wasn't despondency the boy held, or at least that wasn't all; it was envy.
His small, human hand rose to my face, and surprisingly, I didn't shy away. His thumb softly caressed the burns surrounding my eyes, and I flinched, but soon eased into it, watching him. It has been awhile since I've experienced flesh-to-flesh contact.
After a moments silence, the boy retreated his hand quickly after realizing what he was doing, shaking his head and apologizing. He let his curiosity get the best of him.
"Thank you," he said after a minute in a hushed whisper, "For everything you have done in the past for us... and everything you have done the other day."
I remember saving this boy. He was all alone, weeping, mourning for the loss of his parents. It was how I found a lot of them, grieving for their lost loved ones.
"I want to be half as strong as you are one day."
Guardian's often receive praises such as this from city inhabitants. Thank you's, and gazes of worship. I never had the opportunity to experience this often, really, for I was always out here, in the wild, doing what guardian's once did. I was known for it. No civilian has ever truly conversed or met the Celestial Nighthawk, most even think my whole story to be a myth. Unfortunately, it was not.
And so, I couldn't help but smile. My first one in years, perhaps. I don't remember. It almost hurt, the strange feeling and activation of multiple facial muscles to produce such a simple, yet significant, thing. He was so young, yet he recognized me, from the stories and, apparently, mentioning's in history classes at schools.
But when I turned my head to again look at him, he was looking down, and his eyes were teared, fists clenched. Within seconds, he transitioned from joyous to saddened once again.
"I want to become a Guardian..." He spoke after a minute, voice cracking as he fought to hold back his tears and weeps. In a swift move, he turned to look at me, tears in his eyes mixed with determination. It broke my heart. "Do you think... I could ever be like you?" Not broke, shattered.
I almost grew emotional myself, feeling the upmost sympathy for this child. He looked at me with that familiar envy as I did to him.
I would give anything to be normal.
And he would equally give the same to be a Guardian.
To simply put it, the answer was no. To both of our wishes. I could not be normal, and he could not be a guardian. But I would not tell him that, no. It would crush him, more than he already is with his grief. Instead I proceeded to stay silent, but I could not conceal the look in my eyes that clearly stated a solicitous NO.
A tear fell from his eye. He looked away, unclenching his fists.
My eyes moved back forward, gazing into the fire, determined to fix this. "Having the ability to wield the Traveler's light does not make one a Guardian," I finally spoke to the boy, voice avoiding emotion, for the first time. I couldn't see it, but I could feel his eyes being placed back on me. "To be a Guardian, you must be valiant, even when you are afraid. Especially when you are afraid."
"Guardians fear?" He asked, voice seeming clear and interested. His sadness must have softened. I sighed, relieved.
"I do," I admitted, looking down at the blazing log. The boy fell silent. "I'm afraid. Always have been." I told myself I would never speak like this to anyone else again, but I quickly realized that it wasn't all about me. I was saying these things because it is what the boy needed to hear. I wasn't a Guardian anymore, but he did not seem to know that. And he didn't have to. "It is almost as if fear is what makes guardians so strong. They fuel us, so in the end, we can conquer and make peace with them."
I finally turned to him once more to see him staring at me with so much veneration, eyes clean of any sign of woe. I continued.
"To be a Guardian, you must fear everything. Fear the death of loved ones. Fear the death of yourself. Fear the destruction of humanity. Fear these things, so that if it happens, you will be prepared, and you can do what you can to defend those lives and the city."
"Did you fear the fall of the Last City? Did you fear this attack?" He suddenly asked.
I hesitated, but decided to answer honestly. There was no reason to lie anymore. "I did not," I admitted. I had the complete opposite state of mind. He furrowed his eyebrows and tilted his head at me. "And because I didn't, I wasn't prepared."
"But you saved so many of us!" It was almost as if he sensed my woe and was trying to cheer me up with his positivity, but the truth of the matter is, two dozen people was not a lot in the overall city population. Don't get me wrong, I refuse to take my accomplishment of saving these people for granted, but...
"I could of done better," I stated, more stern than I probably should have. Not too loud, though; I couldn't wake the others up. The boy flinched, shocked at my outburst of emotion. I was angry, my own fists now moving to clench by my sides. I wanted to rant about my exile, how the Nighthawk forced so much hatred and rage on my mind. If I was still at the Tower, if I was still a Guardian, I could of been more prepared. I could of tried to fight back Ghaul, and if I couldn't, I could of saved so many more people.
If I never met him that one day after Twilight Gap... If I never fell victim to love... I would of been prepared. I would still be a Guardian.
Not moments later, I felt a small hand being placed on my own. My eyes again snapped over to the boy in shock. He had that same smile on his face that I once held.
It was then that all the words I had said to him, and that one delicate question of his consumed my thinking. My immediate response, was no, he couldn't become a Guardian, but after contemplating my own words, that wasn't the case.
The truth is, he could be a Guardian if he wanted to, he just wouldn't have the light. My eyes held so much sympathy in that moment, holding that answer of no, but it wasn't for him.
It was for me. I would never be normal.
I am trapped in this prison of naught until the Traveler dies or I myself perish into the black and white of history.
"Your question from earlier...," Like a true Guardian, I pushed back my emotions, concentrating more on the boy than myself. My facade returned solemn as I gazed at the boy with utmost authenticity.
His eyes seemed to gleam. He was nervous, scared of my verbal response.
"Yes, even you can become a Guardian."
FLASHBACK
Six years after Ren's Tower departure
"A DISCOVERY AT BURNING LAKE"
"Target spotted. Two-hundred meters," my voice was hushed. A mere sniper rifle was shoved into the crook of my shoulder, head lowered, and right eye piercing through the scope. Ghost was vanished, but I could hear his movement beside me. "What is that thing?"
The cross hairs of the scope focused on the beast as I studied it with emphasis and intense curiosity. The creature was large and covered in a natural, maroon-colored set of armor, appearing exceptionally formidable. "It seems to be standing at approximately 9-feet. Female, I think... Maybe genderless?" The helm was sizable and it had three green eyes that glowed, sharp teeth baring.
In conclusion, it was terrifying, not only because of it's appearance, but also because it is unknown to me. That being said, it is unpredictable, and uncertainty is dangerous.
Ghost spoke, "Let me search the forum."
Two seconds passed.
"Ah!" He vocalized, "Just recently actually... Rezyl Azzir spotted a creature similar looking to this beast on the moon. A 'Hive Wizard,' he called it. He killed the Wizard's consort and took his 'chitin' to adorn the Rose hand cannon."
"Hive, huh?" I lowered the rifle, lifting up my head to stare at the beast with my bare eyes.
"But... that is the only interaction recorded with these 'Hive'. Nobody took Azzir to be serious, thinking him mad, so the city just disregarded this. Should I alert the Tower?"
I've only been to the Tower five times after the Twilight Gap Remembrance ceremony. But only stayed for a few minutes each time to return engrams, and organize my vault, never visited unless it was with Brask. One time I stayed for a day because he consulted me on the Faction Accords. Those factions, always causing trouble with each other. It has been a while since my last visit.
"They better regard it soon, looks like they are invading Earth now," Ghost stayed silent. I placed the rifle back on my shoulder, leaning down to gaze through the scope. "Not yet, I wish to study this thing longer... The question is, is it hostile?"
It was quiet out, and that one Hive creature appeared all alone. I watched it walk, studying its movement and weapon in hand. "Strange weapon," I commented. The day was fading, so as minutes pass by, the atmosphere grows darker. Ghost protests, saying we should retreat to my ship and return to the city to report this at once, but I ignored him and stayed still, trying to learn more about this creature. I could very well be one of the first Guardians to discover one of these things. I wasn't going to abandon this after spotting it so soon.
As it turns out, that was an amateur mistake.
I heard movement, but I ignored it, merely thinking it was the wind blowing a few weeds against the crust. I was too late when Ghost suddenly shouted my name, and something stepped in front of my view of the hive beast.
When I lowered my rifle and made eye contact, a loud screech came from it, piercing my ears and most likely gaining attention from it's allies.
I, myself, fell backwards and shrieked in shock, curses spewing from my lips as I struggled to sit myself up.
This creature was similar looking to that of the other, but smaller. Possibly the grunt of the species, like a Dreg is to it's Captain.
Suddenly, my sniper disappeared from my hand and was replaced by a hand cannon, thanks to my ghost. Immediately, I raised the weapon and shot it. I didn't even aim, but managed to get a head-shot, instantly killing the thing. I watched the body wither and collapse to the floor in an ash-like matter.
"Shit..." I cursed, sitting myself up. Ghost appeared in front of me, looking me over for injuries, but I raised my opposite hand and pushed his shell away. "I'm fine, I'm fine. I guess that answers my question. The Hive species should be labeled as minions of the darkness. Precision is the head. Note that."
When I stood up and dusted myself off, I heard more noises similar to that of the Hive minion. When I looked up, I froze. Coming from behind hills, rocks, and caves, dozens of Hive came out of hiding, putting their attention on me, screaming to alert everyone in the proximity.
"Ghost, start recording—"
"But, Guardian!"
"I'm about to fight a newly-discovered species, the data you can collect will be more significant to City history than you know. Do as I—" But I couldn't finish, for a beast alike the one I was originally spectating quickly ran to my side and took a swing at me with some strange sword-like weapon. I instantly tossed myself forward, performing a successful dodge before turning, grasping hold of one of the throwing knives attached to my belt, heating it with my solar, and throwing the blade at the creature.
I watched for his response. It wasn't smart, really, waiting for even just a second before attacking and putting an end to the thing, but I also wanting to learn more. And that can only be found through battle and spectating.
A scream of agony came from the beast as the fire penetrated its frame, I then finished it off with a head-shot from the hand cannon. "It's armor withers underneath my fire. A weakness, perhaps?" Ghost watched me, his "eye" being that of red instead of blue, signalling that he was, indeed, recording.
Solar must be their weakness, like Arc damage is to the Fallen.
There was no time to think about it, though.
The mass of hive began approaching expeditiously, I almost had no time to react. It was made up of three types or forms of hive enemy; There were the large formidable beasts, the grunt-morphs, and the smaller, weaker-looking enemy. They didn't have any visible eyes and appeared to have a more skeletal-like appearance. And they were fast, traveling in a large pack and approaching very quickly.
I tried to disregard the need to observe, forcing my body to act. Cupping my left hand, I formed an Incendiary Grenade, throwing it to the group of brisk-hive. As it explodes, the fire spreads to the body, instantly killing them all.
They were so weak, it took almost nothing to kill them. I managed to take out almost a dozen with one grenade. I suppose they weren't bred for resilience, perhaps for distraction and damage, at least when they were in packs such as that. I can only imagine being swarmed by a group of them, their sharp, long claws digging into my skin.
Again, there was no time to fret. The fighting continued as the grunts and large beasts approached me with no hint of hesitation. So far, not a scratch was on me, and the exhilaration and adrenaline scuttling through me, precipitated my light to quickly build up, and before I knew it, I felt the immense amount of light in my frame spark. My super was ready.
And so, I wouldn't waste not even a second. I raised my hand cannon in the air, allowing the flames to conquer all. My flesh was set ablaze, but it was not painful, for I have grown used to the solar aptitude after much training. It is a strong element, but easily managed by those destined to wield it.
Counting down the seconds I had left to use such a power, I turned and aimed the weapon, killing off the three major-ranked, formidable enemies, including the one I was studying earlier. With each shot, I felt a wave of relief overcome me as I released that light. After my primary ability faded away, I did not falter, yet continued at full speed, knife in my left hand, hand cannon in my right. I've mastered my weapons, therefore I was more than capable to hit precision after precision. With every melee kill, I felt the rotting armor and flesh of the hive make contact with the cloth over my hands and arms. I wanted to take a sample, but such an enemy is not like the fallen, where the body remains after death, but instead withers into thin air. Such a shame.
I eventually lost track of time, there were so many of them and it was as if they never stopped coming. I was exhausted, and injured, yet my light proceeded to heal me. But eventually, the waves shortened, and soon, there was nothing.
My body panted in absolute exhaustion, as I sat down, awaiting another wave.
"Guardian, me must go! You can not continue like this!"
I turned to see Ghost protesting to me in a desperate manner. The red of his eye changed to the original blue, disobeying my request of recording the fight for data due to his great worry.
He was right, technically. My body ached and required genuine rest, yet I stayed, refusing to move as my eyes glared into the pit the hive initially descended and revealed themselves from. I felt the earth shake beneath me.
"We are not done here, yet, Ghost," I turned to him and smiled, even though he could not see my face underneath my helmet. The crust shook in a manner like something was walking. Step after step. "Something is coming," I said abruptly, lowering myself to the ground. I watched the blackness of the hole.
It was dark now. I had night vision programmed into my helmet, of course, but it was still dangerous nonetheless. Minions of the darkness thrive in, well, darkness.
Sure enough, something did eventually exit and showed itself, and what it was actually made me gasp and curse in absolute terror. "What the hell is that thing?" I cried out in fright, louder than intended, therefore, catching the monsters gaze. The creature had the same skeletal appearance of that of the brisk, smaller hive I encountered that traveled in packs, but was larger, much larger. It's precision spot was not visually perceivable. It appeared to lack eyes and its teeth were bared, countenance and armor thick.
I've never witnessed anything more stronger or terrifying in my entire existence, more than Fallen Barons. I didn't know what it was going to do, so I watched it reluctantly. Soon, though, it began it's assault, shooting at me relentlessly with... void energy? From its "eyes". How does this morph of hive have the ability to fire that of a specific element from its own body?
I shrieked and lowered myself behind the hill. Ghost vanished to prevent being spotted and shot down, but still spoke intensely. "Guardian!" I ignored him, reaching for my hand cannon to reload. "Ren!" But with the loud vocalization of my name coming from him, I finally looked up at him. Ghost never calls me by my actual name unless he was genuinely distraught and serious. "Please, we have to leave. You can not win—"
But he could not finish, for another loud shriek came from the monstrosity behind us and the small mound of earth. With that, I transitioned my focus back to reloading my weapon, but upon opening the cylinder to my revolver, and seeing it empty, I panicked. My hands patted over my belt, but no ammunition could be found.
"Shit," I cursed, my heart skipped a beat. I was screwed. I was out of primary ammo, and my energy weapon that was currently equipped was a sniper rifle, I could not get a proper shot at such a close distance. Even if I instructed Ghost to switch to a shotgun, I would have to find new ammunition.
"What's wrong?!" Ghost was freaking out for my sake.
I didn't answer him right away, only asking, "Do I have ammunition for heavy?"
But he didn't answer, which gave me my answer. I was completely out.
"Damn it!" I cursed loudly, not caring for the necessity of hushing my volume. I could hear the beast getting closer. Gunslinger wasn't ready and I only had one knife left.
Anyone who was in my position would typically give up, but I couldn't. There was no chance that I could survive this thing, but I could not give up.
I quickly lifted my head, turning to peak over the mount of dirt, watching the beast come closer, scanning the ground for ammo that any of my previous kills could have dropped. And I did, a primary ammo crate sat a few yards behind the creature. My eyes narrowed.
"Ren, don't—!"
I ignored him, I almost didn't even hear him, I just started moving, static conquering my perception. My hand reached for my final knife, heating it with my fire, and abruptly throwing it to pierce the beast where the eyes would be, where it was shooting it's beams of void. When it screamed in agony, I took the opportunity, running at full speed towards it. The monsters hands reached up to its face as the knife continues to burn into its skull, clawing at itself to rid its body of the daggers effect.
I, on the other hand, took advantage, sliding myself in between its legs to quickly grab hold of the box. I grabbed my hand cannon, using the grip of the gun to break open the crate and collect the ammunition, loading my gun in seconds.
But as I was expeditiously reloading the gun, not even a few feet away from the struggling beast, something managed to catch my eye. One by one, I quickly inserted the solid bullets into the cylinder, hands shaking, but, for some reason, my head lifted momentarily, shifting to gaze to my right. Sitting there, hidden among the long-deceased bushes, behind a compact boulder where I could not see before, was an exotic engram.
Time seemed to stop for a moment, static congesting my eardrums. My eyes would widen and marvel at the sight that I have been given an exotic, my first actually. I was so astonished, that I completely let my guard down unintentionally, hand extending to reach for engram.
But it was too late.
I do not know what happened after that. All I remember was the static, and sudden, alarmed shout of my name coming from my Ghost. All I remembered was the abrupt darkness that took over my visualization that I was all too familiar with, yet the gold of that one engram remained. Such a silly thing, really.
Then, I never truly knew how much that small, tediously-colored box would change the rest of my life, and the life of the city forever.
Author's Note:
I was simply so into writing the past scene that I lost track of how much I was writing. I wanted to minimize the detail, so I could add more story, but after reading over this, I actually quite enjoy it, and I hope you guys do too! I was wanting to add more, but I suppose that will have to wait until next chapter.
Nonetheless, I hope you guys enjoyed Chapter Four!
Make sure to favorite, follow, and REVIEW! I'd love to know what you guys think of Celestial so far!
Stay tuned for Chapter Five!