Chapter Six

"A NIGHTMARE"

The events that played after occurred slower than what I desired them to be.

As I went to pull the trigger, I viewed out of the corner of my eye as Andal's frame rose, leaping himself in the air to actually bring his super to life. The barrel of the gun I boldly held pointed straight at Zavala's skull, and he was frozen in place. I watched as Brask called his void forth and revealed his bow. Pulling back, he hesitantly shot his arrow.

Whatever force controlled me then was not fast enough to acknowledge what was going on outside of demolishing its target.

And so, as I pulled the trigger, I did not feel or hear the sound of a brawny gunshot.

No.

Instead, I felt the arrow of Brask's light pierce into my frame, extinguishing my fire from the foundation of my heart.

In that moment, all scorching heat from before disappeared, the lethal migraine vanished, my hearing and vision was restored, and I was once again in control of my body and heedful of everything happening around me. But not completely, for the affects of Brask's deadly shadow-shot remained, and I found myself collapsing to my knees, gasping for breath as the hand cannon I previously held hit the concrete with a hefty plow. Instinctively, my hand raised to my heart, the source of the pain, looking back up at Brask.

His features were conquered in grief and sorrow, hating himself for using his super on his friend, and for doing so in such a risky manner, but still understanding of the necessity of said actions. The only thing that can cancel out a super in action is that if a Hunter's void. He knew what he had to do, but was so congested with woe that he literally had to turn to avoid any contact with me, hating the sight of seeing my staggering frame responding to his shot.

My eyes then traced downward, seeing the arrow stick out of my chest and how his void covered my entire body to destroy any light. Eventually, though, the arrow disappeared as well did the purple hue, signalling his super was up. Struggling to breathe, my hand rose to my chest, feeling my blood-soaked suit and looking back down at my fingers, seeing the red paint my white.

The last thing I remember was watching Zavala shouting something to the soldiers and Speaker behind me and back at his fireteam members, ushering them to come help me. Ikora didn't hesitate, but Brask was frozen, back facing me, he as well soon dropping to his knees, head in his hands.

And then, death. Succumbing to the dusk.

"Starlight will be your guide, now," said the voice as my body collapsed in demise, "No vacuum will contain you, for you are the Celestial Nighthawk."

TWO DAYS AFTER DEATH AND REVIVAL

I don't remember a time I was dead for that long. Most of the time, it's merely for maybe thirty seconds, sometimes a minute at most if a teammate isn't around to revive me with their own light. Revival was a heavy task for a ghost and requires an immense amount of light and concentration on their part. So one can only imagine the surprise I felt when I finally opened my eyes and read a wall clock that revealed a date two days after the day of the... situation.

"We apprehended you would never wake up."

Looking to my left, I saw Zavala situated beside me, gazing at me with a soft smile and tired eyes. My eyes fluttered awake, searching and soon finding the immobile frame of my ghost sitting on the small table to the side opposite to that of Zavala, the blue light that signaled his life was gone, my eyebrows furrowed, tears coming to my eyes. Was my ghost...?

"Do not fret," I quickly shifted back to Zavala, "Your Ghost is just resting, restoring his light. It took a lot out of him to revive you, out of all of us. I have never seen someone require so much out of so many Guardians and ghosts for a single revival." Remembering everything that happened, my hands quickly raised to my face, only to feel flesh. In shock, I felt my body jump up and to my feet. "Ren, don't, you shouldn't be—," of course, he protested, but I only continued to briskly move to the mirror.

I saw... my face, back to normal, like nothing happened, like that helmet never even existed.

"It's not gone, if that's what you're wondering," Zavala stood and followed me, standing behind me and staring at myself with me. "We just... couldn't get it off of you. It's still equipped now, but before Ghost went to sleep, he managed to make it appear clear and invisible, as if it was unequipped, but not."

Brask came to mind.

"Andal, is he—"

"Andal has been absent from his post. He feels... responsible." From the low and sorrowful tone of his voice, I could tell that this was serious and Brask had been exceptionally affected. "I had my ghost notify him as well as Ikora Rey, of which I assume you heard is our new Warlock Vanguard, and the Speaker of your awakening."

I turned away from the mirror, facing him. "And you... you are..."

"Vanguard Commander?"

I nodded.

He laughed, "You predicted it, not me, remember the day we initially met?"

I chuckled as well at the memory, only to end up having a coughing fit. Zavala put his hand on my back and led me back to the infirmary bed so I could sit down again.

"From Greenhorn, to Commander... not bad," He helped me get back in bed, covering me and raising the back of the bed so I could sit up. "So, Commander, what are you doing in a place like this when you obviously have other things to be doing?"

"It hasn't been the same ever since what happened, well, happened. The whole Tower saw you then and it really concerned a lot of people. But overall, things are in order."

Actions such as using your light or general super and abilities is strictly prohibited at the Tower or inside the walls. You aren't even allowed to use your secondary jump. You are allowed to have your weapons visible but usage is banned. Safety precautions, I suppose, and both I and Brask broke those rules. But then again, I never had control. That wasn't me, and he was using his toprotect the city. I just hope the Speaker sees it that way when he finally approaches us about it, which should be very soon.

"What of the Hive invasion?" I almost completely forgot about it.

Zavala hesitated, "We will discuss that later in the Vanguard hall with the others. You are now a very important piece in this puzzle, Ren, I hope you are prepared for everything that is going to be heading your way."

I am aware that the exotic I found had everything to do with what happened, but I didn't know what it was, therefore I didn't understand it. I need to speak to Brask.

I looked away from Zavala and down at my lap, twiddling my hands together as they shook rapidly. I was terrified of everything that was currently going on.

Dozing off, I almost didn't realize the sudden warmth that swarmed my frame, stronger than that of my own. Opening my eyes, I looked at Zavala upon seeing his hand latched to mine. It was an act of comfort, but the moment I made eye contact with him, I couldn't help but feel tears come to my eyes again, remembering everything I have done in my moment of falter. I remember the look in his eyes, the fear, I remember aligning the iron sights of my hand cannon with the center of his head.

His smile turned into a frown upon recognizing my despondency.

"I'm sorry, Zavala, I never meant for—"

But he only hushed me, and spoke for himself, "It wasn't your fault."

I felt his thumb caress up and down my hand to console me. You'd expect his hands to be cold due to the fact he is a wielder of not only arc, but void, which was considered rare. Brask is always complaining about how cold he is, but I suppose the combination of them both cancels out and equals to that of solar, if that makes any sense. I don't know, but all I can say is that I truly felt enhanced by his touch.

"I could have killed you," my tone was solemn, attempting to extinguish any sign of sorrow.

Zavala laughed, making me look up again in surprise, "I have lived through many battles, Ren. It will take more than a single Gunslinger shot to take me down."

I know he was trying to make a joke, and get a laugh or some expression of happiness out of me, but the reality of it all overpowered any humor. It wasn't a joke. I don't think Zavala, or anyone present at the time understands how much light was actually surging through my body at the time. It was possibly enough to kill a Guardian and demolish all of their light, meaning no revival. Zavala could have forever perished by my hands.

And if that had of happened, I would never forgive myself and persistently doubt myself as a Guardian.

But instead of pushing the topic, I decided to reach forward and actually embrace the man in both apology and thanks.

Astonished, Zavala hesitantly hugged back, but eventually relaxed. He had his armor on due to him coming to visit in his moments of free time from working as a Vanguard and Commander, so it wasn't the most comfortable embrace, yet still warm nonetheless.

"Thank you for being here," I mumbled, cheek pressed against his neck.

He was warm.

He didn't say anything in response. The hug didn't last long, but I am assuming he understood the gesture.

Hearing the door open, we quickly separated and Zavala cleared his throat, standing as I myself, actually blushed, and sat back. The first person who entered was Ikora Rey, followed by... Andal. He managed to push past the others, taking me in with a tight, almost too tight, embrace. I felt his hot breath on my neck as he exhaled in relief. I felt scruff, meaning Brask had let himself go these past few days. He typically remains freshly shaved at all times. And there was a decent amount, meaning he must of been exceptionally stressed.

"Ren," he breathed out, pulling away. "Ren, I'm so sorry—"

"Don't," I said quickly, smiling at him. "Andal, you saved me."

His eyebrows furrowed, but soon he nodded and straightened his posture to appear professional. Brask knew he did the right thing, but the results, meaning the chance of survival, were unpredictable.

I looked back and forth to everyone standing in my infirmary room, "Can someone explain to me what is going on?" Honestly, I was nervous. I knew everyone very well, except for Ikora, but it was still pressuring being in the same room as all three Vanguards, and being the center of attention.

"Do you remember much about the other day? When you discovered the Hive on Earth," Inquired Brask, crossing his arms and returning his attitude to a more stern one.

I thought and then shook my head, "I mean, I guess."

Ikora took over, "Your Ghost recorded it all. When the Ogre killed you, the exotic engram you found managed to... decode itself." Ikora spoke slowly as if she was surprised at her own words. The only thing that can decode a wild engram is a Cryptarch. It is a very precious process, so to hear such a thing is, well, unbelievable. "It also managed to equip itself without the usage or permission of your Ghost. Guardian, the exotic revived you on its own. You. . . killed the ogre and passed out. Around this time, reinforcements were on their way in response to your Ghost's distress signal."

That's impossible. I don't remember any of that happening. I was dead. That "ogre" killed me.

Brask pulled out his own ghost and ushered it to my own as Ikora spoke. Though what she was saying was important, I concentrated on Brask's ghost as it scanned mine, actually transferring some of its light. Eventually, his blue little light slowly came on as he was compelled to awaken from his slumber. The room fell silent upon ghost's awakening. He rose into the air and immediately shifted to me. His shell relaxed when seeing me awake.

"Guardian," he said weakly, yet relieved. I smiled at him.

"Sorry to wake you up so abruptly, Ghost, but I'm afraid we need to see the data collected from Burning Lake," Brask stated sternly. His own ghost vanished.

Ghost looked at him, then slowly back at me. He was obviously hesitant. Nonetheless, he proceeded, flying forward to cast the video on one of the plain walls. Brask turned to turn off one of the lights in the room so we could see.

What was playing right now was where I first asked for ghost to begin recording. It showed me repelling the hive with substantial skill, casting my super, and also audio was enabled, so that included our dialogue exchanges. It was slowly growing more dark, so the video soon shifted to night vision colorations.

The Vanguards have already seen everything, but as the video proceeds, I personally grew more and more anxious. When the Ogre originally came out, Ghost stopped recording. I remember turning to see this as he tried to convince me to retreat, but of course, I refused.

When the video resumed, it was after I had been killed as a result of one of the Ogre's melee attacks. My body laid flat, withered and crushed, blood spewing out of my dead frame. It was a truly devastating sight, one that could make one vomit in response to the sight of gore. The video was of course in the point of view of ghost, and he was trying to get to me, spewing out many "oh no's" and shouts of my title. I don't even think he realized he was recording this. But as soon as he began the reviving process, the ogre shot his beams of light at him, so he had no choice but to fall back. Ghosts can go invisible, sure, but when they do tasks such as scanning equipment/areas, or reviving their Guardian, their camouflage gets cancelled out.

My deceased arm was outstretched, so ghost ended up following it to find the exotic Engram. Waiting until the patrolling Ogre turned his back to him, Ghost scanned the Engram only to witness it disappear. Disappointed, he turned back to me, only to see movement.

I was moving, bones snapping back into place as a scream of pain escaped my lips. It wasn't as smooth as a typical revive. I looked like I was suffering.

I brought my legs to my chest in the bed, chin sitting on my knees as I watched the video intently. The others began to get uneasy.

"Guardian! But I didn't..." he dragged, only able to watch as my body painfully revived itself, light visibly surging back into my body. "How..?"

Unfortunately, the stentorian sound of my shrieks once again attracted the attention of the Ogre. It quickly turned, roared, and stalked toward my staggering frame.

Ghost quickly flew to my body and managed to heal me. The video showed me grabbing my weapon, rising, and evading behind a large boulder in just enough time to avoid the Hive monster's void.

"Guardian, I don't understand..." The video showed my cloaked backside facing him, intently waiting for the Ogre to show its face again. "I've alerted the city of everything and reinforcements are on their way... We need to get out while we can. There is no way you can fight in this state—"

"You think me feeble? A sheep?" The recording showed me turning to ghost, and revealing that of the helmet of which automatically equipped itself. The face of a hawk. The glowing, red eyes of the Devil.

Ghost went quiet momentarily, obviously shocked at not only the helmet, but of my voice.

It was me but, it wasn't. My tone was laced in anger and venom, a tone I never before heard from myself.

"That's not what I—"

"I will not yield, Ghost!" I shouted, turning back forward as the Ogre revealed itself again. Standing, flames exploded from my frame, signalling super initiation.

"Ren, no!"

I rose the weapon, aiming, and walking forward at the same time.

And shot.

One bullet. And then it was over.

The video showed the bullet detonating within the Ogre's head, making it explode, and ultimately killing it. I watched as the thing withered away to nothing.

The fire surrounding me soon extinguished itself. Ghost said nothing, but turned upon seeing the bright light of a Vanguard ship. When turning back to me, my body collapsed, passing out.

It was then the recording concluded. Ghost turned back to me. Everyone turned to look at me.

Tears begged to cloud my eyes.

That wasn't me. It couldn't be.

Who am I?

And yet, I chose to remain strong.

"You've been chosen," Brask said. It almost sounded like it pained him to say that, "to be the next Celestial Nighthawk."

"Exotics don't choose people," Even though I knew it was true, I had the need to continue fighting that truth. "Exotics aren't 'living'."

"Then I'd really like for you to explain what the hell we just watched," there was a hint of hostility in his voice, but it wasn't intentionally hostile, it was more of a "You need to admit this to yourself" tone than anything.

I went silent. I lowered my legs to sit in a crossed position, slouching, and again twiddling my fingers. Brask approached me with a hand-mirror, holding it in front of my face. I looked up, seeing my plain, tired features, but as Ghost moved to me and scanned, skin was replaced with metal and exotic material.

"Your fire," said Brask as my armor replaced my infirmiry gown, "will never be outgunned."

My hand rose to take the mirror from him and study the helmet myself. Features of a bird, but an overall force to be reckoned with. I had a slight headache, but it wasn't as bad as the other day. My hand rose to feel it. It was warm, but not scorching.

Suddenly, we all turned when we saw the door to the infirmiry open. The Speaker entered.

"Guardian," he greeted, "It is relieving to see you awake. I hope you are adjusting well to this... change."

I nodded, placing the mirror on a bedside table. Ghost then unequipped my armor and I was again back in my gown.

"The Nighthawk had been comatose since the beginning of the Collapse," the Speaker stated. Suddenly, I felt afraid. "But... awoke in response to your light." He was clearly surprised. "I have witnessed another Guardian be chosen by it many cycles ago, but he did not survive it's trial of will. We were afraid you would face the same fate." The room fell silent for a moment. Brask's eyelids fell. "I scold myself now for ever thinking you could not. I doubted your strength and for that, I apologize. And though I am disenchanted over the other days actions performed by both you and our Hunter Vanguard, I am forgiving to the circumstances. So, do not take it for granted when I say, wield it with your coherent appetite for vengeance, Guardian."

It felt like I was just given a new title, a new job or responsibility; Granted, I was, kind of, but it was strange to think about.

I didn't feel any different, not really. I feel like I just woke up from a nightmare and things were okay, but ever since my suspicions were confirmed, there is an increasing fear within me.

I couldn't say anything, for I was still taking in everything. The Speaker clearly understood this, because he soon departed having said what he needed to say.

"We would like for you to meet us in the Vanguard Hall when you think you're ready to move," stated Ikora, looking back and forth between Brask and Zavala. "This changes... everything."

With that, the Warlock and Hunter left as well.

Zavala stayed for a second longer.

"Take your time with everything," he said softly, again reaching for my hand and giving it a comforting squeeze. I smiled, made eye contact with him, and unintentionally blushed.

He is so warm.

We gazed at each other for a moment before Zavala furrowed his eyebrows and looked away, coughing as if he felt awkward and standing in a professional manner. "See you soon."

I frowned as I watched him leave so abruptly, suddenly feeling a huge wave of loneliness scuttle through me.

How I'd love to have such a warmth.

Authors Note:

Okay, so I obviously exaggerated some of the facts about the Celestial Nighthawk exotic in this chapter and will proceed to for plot. No, the exotic doesn't actually revive the Guardian, but hey, it makes for a good story.

Also, I felt kind of awkward when writing how Ghost was equipping and unequipped armor, imagining the scene in my head and how strange it must look, but it really do be like that in the actual Destiny Universe, haha. Guardians get dressed and undressed in a matter of a mere second if they use their ghost.

AND, the next few chapters will be focused on Zavala and Ren as they grow closer while at the same time showing Ren adjusting to the Celestial role. YES, I KNOW, FINALLY. I did warn this would be slow burn, though. I hope you all are excited because I definitely am. It's only chapter six, but since I make them SO long, averaging about 5,000-6,000 words a chapter, I can imagine all those that are here for the romance and fluff are thinking "ABOUT TIME."

If I don't update again by Christmas, I hope you all have an excellent holiday season!

Remember to favorite, follow, and review if you are enjoying!

Stay tuned for chapter seven❤️