Toxic Rose
Chapter Six: I Wish I Could Change the Past
When Bella came to she was lying on Alice's bed, thankfully clothed now. She sat up, her head throbbing, and looked to see that all the Cullen's were in the room, whispering amongst each other. They looked none the worse for wear after the party and Bella wondered why they were all here when she remembered why she had fainted in the first place. She felt a mixture of disgust, self loathing, shame, embarrassment, guilt, sadness and anger swirl around inside her, making a toxic and self destructive concoction. They now knew the real her and that hurt. She hadn't wanted them to know that part of her; she'd wanted to spare them from it. And now she was fearful of their reaction, although it should be something she was used to. It was always the same-repulsion.
Oh god, how many people knew besides them? Did the whole school know? I can't go there anymore, I have to transfer out, I can't stand the thought of everyone knowing and bullying me again.Bella had made the mistake of telling one of her best friends at home that she was gay and within a week the whole school had known. She was bullied, ignored, but worst of all, lost her best friend who was disgusted by her. The moment that Bella had confessed she had seen a look of extreme revulsion cross her face and knew she had fucked up. She just hadn't known how badly until the end.
Bella let out a groan and put her face in her hands. She didn't want to start over again. Everything had been going fine and now she would be friendless again.
"Looks like sleeping beauty is up." A loud voice announced and Bella picked up her head to see that the Cullen's had noticed she was awake.
"How are you?" Alice was the first to ask and sat down on the bed next to Bella. She tried to hold onto Bella's hands but the girl shrunk back and pulled up the covers, like a frightened animal. Alice frowned at this action. "Bella sweetie, what's wrong?"
"You know what's wrong," she whispered. "You guys hate me now, I know it."
"Hate you?" Alice asked offended. "And why would we?"
"Yea if anyone is hated here, it's Edward and his weird taste in music," Emmett joked to which Edward frowned. "My music taste is not weird. You guys just don't know how to appreciate good music."
Seeing that Bella didn't laugh at his joke Emmett forced his face into a more serious expression. "Seriously, Bella, no one hates you. What brought this all on?"
"Was it Rosalie? She can be a bitch sometimes," Alice asked and Bella shot the blonde a look, remembering what had transpired in the bathroom. The blonde stared back impassively at her before rolling her eyes and going to examine the nails on her hand. Even though the blonde was now clothed, with a gray shirt that covered her stomach properly and long red pants, Bella still remembered the softness and warmth of her body and her mouth got dry.
"Bella? Earth to Bella?" Alice called and Bella realized she had been staring awkwardly at Rosalie for a while now. Blushing she turned and shook her head no, in answer to Alice's previous question.
"Is this about the whole gay thing?"
Bella nodded her head slowly. Alice let out a laugh. "Really, Bella? It's not that serious of a matter that we know. Honestly, we don't care. You like who you like and that's your business. We wont judge you for it."
"Besides its kinda hot," Emmett added to which Alice shot him a scolding look. He put his hands up. "What? It's true."
"You don't understand," Bella felt her throat tightening on her with the threat of tears. "People bullied me cause of it, I...I can't trust others with this knowledge."
Alice shook her head. "Bella, none of us would do that to you. Only we know and we're going to keep it that way. If it makes you feel better, I'm bisexual. And I've experimented with both sides. The kids at school know but I don't care. I only care that I am happy and with the one I love."
Yea, but you're pretty and cool, Bella thought bitterly. Anyone would be glad to have a chance to date you. I'm just an ugly little dyke.
Seeing that Bella still looked downtrodden Alice turned to the other Cullen's in the room. "Right guys? We don't care that she's gay, she's still our friend."
"Hell yea," Emmett said without hesitation. "And if you ever wanna kiss a girl, make sure to invite me."
"Emmett," Alice hissed but the big man just laughed.
"I don't have any particular issue with you on that point," Jasper spoke up, tipping his head respectfully.
"And I don't really care about romantics and the likes," Edward added. "You fuck who you wanna." Bella winced at his harsh language.
All that was left was for Rosalie to say something. She glared at Bella, their eyes meeting before she looked at Alice. "It's not like I care what she does with her life anyways."
Alice smiled at that. "Of course you don't Rosalie." Rosalie stiffened at that but didn't say anything more and Bella could swear she saw a hint of unease on the taller girl's face.
Alice turned to Bella. "So you see, we don't hate you, and we're not going to tell the others. Please take it easy Bella. This doesn't change anything between us. In fact it makes us closer."
These warm words of acceptance were what Bella had craved for so long. Tears that had built up behind her eyes during this conversation finally burst and she threw herself into the pixies arms to cry."There, there," the pixie soothed as she patted Bella's back. "It's all going to be okay."
That phrase turned out to be one of the biggest lies that Bella ever heard; not that she knew it at that moment.
The following day it was time to go back to school and Bella dreaded it. Despite her friends assurances she still felt awkward and on guard now that her secret was out. She was contemplating skipping school as the very thought of going and finding out that the Cullen's had spilled her secrets and everyone knew was enough to make her sick. She let out a sigh and pulled herself out of bed. No, she had to trust her friends. Maybe they really bore her no ill will. Besides, her dad would be pissed at her if she didn't go to school today. He was mad at her when she came home the next day from the party as opposed to the night of. Thankfully Alice had called her dad previously before and let him know what had happened. With her charm, and using the fact that Bella's dad had a soft spot for her, she manged to get rid of the worst punishments. So he was less angry than originally. But he had still not completely forgiven her and so she didn't want to anger him more.
So she got ready for school and was downstairs eating cereal when a honking noise made her look up. She arched a brow confused. What was going on outside? The honking continued. Was it Alice? Had she come to check up on Bella and make sure she went to school? Bella checked her phone, but there were no texts from Alice. Frowning, she decided the car must be for someone else. She went back to eating her cereal only to have the honking continue, more incessant than before. Letting out an annoyed sigh she got up to look out the window. She and Alice had been texting a lot over the weekend about her big not so secret secret and Bella had told her that she didn't want her to check up on her. She had made it explicitly clear. Of course Alice had a penchant of thinking she always knew best and disregarding others opinions.
Pushing aside the curtains she almost choked on the last bits of her cereal when she saw who was standing outside her driveway and honking their horn. It was Rosalie. Letting the curtains fall back she stepped away from the window as if it was on fire. What was the blonde Cullen doing here? Was she still here for revenge on Bella for whatever had happened Halloween night? Bella still had not found out what had warranted the blonde's erratic actions the day after the party. Bella touched her neck where her mark from Rosalie's bite still was. Another loud honk rang through the air and Bella decided she had to go tell the blonde to stop before she woke up the whole neighborhood. Nervously opening the door to her house, Bella peered out before calling Rosalie. The blonde looked up from her phone and scowled. She had the driver's door of her car open, one leg on the seat and right hand on the horn, left side of her body planted outside the car. Once she saw Bella she fully got out of the car and approached the brunette, who shrunk more into her house but didn't close the door.
"Took you long enough," the blonde said and glanced at Bella who only had a sliver of her face visible through the crack in the door.
"What did you want Rosalie?" She stammered clutching the door frame. The blonde snorted at Bella's apparent fear of her.
"I'm picking you up for school."
"What?"
"Are you deaf? I said I'm picking you up for school. Now hurry and get into the car."
Bella nodded her head and closed the door before grabbing her backpack, her heart and mind racing. Why was Rosalie picking her up? Was this Alice's doing? Since Bella had told her she couldn't pick her up, she had sent Rosalie? But Alice knew that Rosalie had bullied Bella and that something in general was not okay with her, so she wouldn't intentionally send the blonde.
What could Bella do now? How did Rosalie even know where she lived? Not wanting to anger Rosalie by making her wait anymore she pulled open the door again and followed Rosalie into her red Mustang. Her hands shook the whole time and when she tried the handle for the back seat Rosalie made a tsk noise. "You're sitting in the passenger seat." Bella gave her a worried look but when she saw it wasn't up for debate, or that Rosalie wasn't kidding, she gulped and headed into the passenger seat.
The inside of the car was gray leather and smelled overwhelmingly of roses, so much that it hurt Bella's head. After she had buckled up she set her bag between her legs and watched from the corner of her eye as Rosalie buckled up as well and then threw the car into reverse, the powerful engine rumbling under Bella's feet. As they drove to school, Bella could feel the tension in the air suffocating her. Sweat gathered on her palms and she looked out the car window, watching the trees blur past as Rosalie poured on the miles. Bella wondered how fast they were going now. What was it with the Cullen's and driving fast?
"So, how was your sleep?" Rosalie's voice shocked Bella who had not been expecting any conversation. She glanced warily at Rosalie whose hands were gripping the steering wheel hard, her gaze on the road. Was Rosalie actually asking her a question? And her tone was even...conversational. Had Alice put her up to this? Bella did want to be treated as humanely as a straight person, but that didn't mean she wanted people to force themselves or others to be nice to her.
"It was okay. But you don't have to force yourself to be nice to me." Bella pushed a strand of hair behind her ear and turned to look at the road again, afraid of Rosalie's reaction.
The blonde didn't answer for a while and Bella felt a stab of anger as she realized Alice was making them all treat her like a charity case. Suddenly the blonde let out a laugh. "Is it really that shocking when I am genuinely being nice?"
Bella snapped her neck so fast towards Rosalie that she hurt it. The blonde was looking at her now, an emotion on her face that Bella couldn't understand. Was it...regret?
"It's fine you don't have to answer my question. Let's listen to some music. What station do you like?"
Bella shrugged, unable to form words with her mouth. This was all so odd. It was like a complete 180 of the older girl's previous behavior. Although if Bella thought back, Rosalie had acted this way before, on Bella's first day of school. The brunette had been staring at her for too long so the blonde had threatened her and then acted super cheery afterwards. Was her nice behavior an act, or was it the bitchy one that was? Could it be, she was bipolar? That would make sense.
Rosalie registered Bella's shrug and flipped through some stations. "I like the indie station, although rock is really my fav." She stopped on a station that was playing a song Bella had never heard before. It's words were dark and the singer was singing about a girl that had been changed into a vampire. Bella didn't peg Rosalie for the type of girl to listen to this kind of music. But then again she had dressed up as a vampire for Halloween.
Call me the end of your world, call me your genocide
Cuz I'm a venomous girl, just like a spider bite
"You like vampires," Bella's mouth blurted out before she realized she had spoken up.
Rosalie smirked. "Yea, I do. They interest because thy're such...tortured creatures of the night. They have the option to be good and more humane or throw themselves into their evil nature and conquer whatever lays before them. And they can so easily give into their desires." As Rosalie said this she looked right into Bella's eyes, voice dipping low on the word desire. Bella felt a bolt of electricity go down her spine and she quickly looked away, a blush forming on her face. Had she just imagined it or did it sound like Rosalie was speaking about herself in a sense, as if she had some unfulfilled desires of her own. But what could the stunning blonde want that she didn't already have?
The trees were thinning out and buildings coming into focus. The school was just on the horizon and Bella couldn't be more glad to see the school. She felt weird, not knowing what to make of Rosalie's words and actions. Thankfully Rosalie didn't make any more conversation as they pulled into the parking lot. The space was still relatively empty and this was thanks to how fast the car was. In Bella's old truck she'd still be halfway to the school, by which point the parking lot would have filled up.
Bella grabbed her bag with her left hand and unbuckled herself quickly before grabbing the handle of the door. "Thanks for the ride," she uttered out before with a sharp click the car door locked. She tugged at the handle uselessly, knowing that no amount of tugging would now open the door. Feeling her heart start to race she turned around to look at Rosalie. The blonde had her head resting on top of her hands on the steering wheel, one cheek pressed against them as she gazed upon Bella with a cruel distant expression; watching the smaller girl struggle with the door handle. The music had stopped, the song turning into a white static that mimicked the buzzing Bella felt in her ears as fear filled her body. Rosalie let the static play, her eyes unblinking in their gaze and smug smile increasing.
Shit, shit, shit! I knew things were going too smoothly. Bella drew her whole body against the door, thinking that if she pressed hard enough against it, maybe she could melt through.
"Rosalie, could you open the door?" Bella croaked out, her throat dry like sandpaper. She placed the bag on the seat between her and the blonde, in an attempt to protect herself, but from what, she didn't know yet.
"R-Rosalie..." Bella trailed off as the blonde pulled her head off the wheel still not responding. She reached for her seat belt unbuckling it, before reaching up to ruffle her hair, all with such languid motions that Bella couldn't help but stare. Stare at how her manicured and slim fingers slide the buckle out, how her gray shirt hitched up over her stomach revealing her tone midriff, how her hair shone in the morning light coming through the car windows. Bella momentarily forgot her fear as she was thrown under the spell the Cullen had on her.
Taking her time, and knowing the effect she was having, Rosalie looked over at Bella, with a hungry expression and began to slid over on her seat towards the brunette, knocking the bag aside. She crawled across on her knees, almost catlike in her actions. Her shirt hung away from her neck, the deep neckline giving way to a perfect view of her black bra and the top of her breasts. Bella tugged more frantically at the door handle, forcing herself out of the spell as she realized with trepidation that the Cullen was getting awfully close to her.
"R-Rosalie" the blonde grabbed Bella's cheek in her left hand and pulled down the neck of the turtleneck the teen was wearing to cover her bruise with her other hand. Drawing a gentle circle on Bella's cheek with her thumb she lowered her head slowly to Bella's neck, causing the other girl to tense up in anticipation. Bella was sure the blonde could feel her scared heartbeat through her neck, and she let out a shaky breath. Why was the blonde doing this?
Rosalie's hair tickled against Bella's face and she caught the whiff of rose, tinged with a darker spicier scent. Rosalie's lips descended upon Bella's bruise and the teen knew what the blonde was going to do before the older girl did it. She bit down on Bella's bruise, and she held back a hiss of pain as the blonde ravaged her flesh before moving from the mark and brushing her lips gently and tortuously slowly up the side of Bella's neck to the lobe of her ear. Goosebumps arose following the trail of Rosalie's lips and Bella couldn't help but shiver internally as Rosalie's parted mouth finally descended upon her ear.
The blonde's warm breath paired with her soft, wet lips sent another shiver, this one stronger than the last through Bella's body. Rosalie kept her lips there for what felt like eternity, as if she knew exactly what she was doing to Bella. Bella squirmed in her seat, legs clasping closed only to find that Rosalie had slide a leg in between Bella's own and was now moving it closer to Bella's crotch, her pant material making a whispering noise as it slid against the leather tantalizingly slow. Bella placed both of her hands against Rosalie's thigh to stop the other girl from moving it any closer. However, the sensations from having Rosalie's mouth so close to her ear was making her arms feel like spaghetti and a part of her welcomed the thought of the blonde's leg there.
Rosalie's mouth began to move against Bella's ear, sending small goosebumps down her neck, accompanied with shivers that ran to the tips of her fingers. Dully Bella realized Rosalie was now whispering something into her ear, her breath pressing deliciously against her ear but it was like she was elsewhere, the words distant and unrecognizable. Only the sensations were currently registering in Bella's mind. The static in the radio hissed loudly helping cover up Bella's failed attempt to stifle a moan as Rosalie's leg reached the apex of her thighs and gently ground against it. Bella's hands from earlier, when she tried to stop Rosalie's leg, now instead of pushing away, were gripping the seams of her pant leg in an effort to stop herself from feeling like this.
Now Rosalie's lips were moving down from her ear to her jawline and leaving little kisses along the way making Bella arch her neck back so that the older woman could reach more, which she did, greedily. She began to pepper kisses up and down Bella's jawline and neck while simultaneously grinding her leg harder and harder. Bella's body was hot and she was tingling from Rosalie's touches, requesting for more simulation. But her lips tingled the most, wanting to press against Rosalie's own but not daring to out of fear of angering the blonde. Bella let out another groan, not even trying to stifle this one as it was too much work to do so. Damn it, she was acting like such a virgin. She should have better control over herself. She couldn't let Rosalie do this to her. But she was a virgin and it felt so nice to have someone touch her in this way.
Rosalie eventually slowed down in her kisses and went back to Bella's mark where she bit down once more. With the pain came a clarity and Bella felt her face burn as she just realized how she had been acting. She couldn't believe she had let the blonde do this to her, again. Where was her own self control?
Once the blonde was done she sat back into her seat, fixing her hair in the rear-view mirror before turning off the radio, pocketing the key to her car and flicking a switch to unlock the car doors. Bella sat stilly in her seat, her body burning from where the blonde had touched her, as she watched the other girl move around the car.
"Why did you do that?" Bella asked breathlessly, at last managing out the burning question that rested on the tip of her tongue. Her neck tingled more from Rosalie's light brushes than it did from the bite.
Rosalie threw a glance over her shoulder, as she angled her body towards the open car door, and rolled her eyes as if the answer should be obvious. "Marking my property," she said and then she exited the car, leaving the door open. Leaning down to look into the car she said "Come one, I don't want to see the sight of you in my car one second more. " Then she slammed the car door shut and marched across the parking lot to class.
Bella grabbed her neck and swallowed in the silence of the car. Her property? What was Rosalie going on about now?
A/N: Song I am referencing to in this chapter is called Like a Vampire.