Toxic Rose
Chapter 26: The Truth Comes Out
"Where's Bella?" Rosalie couldn't keep the edge of panic out of her voice as she ran down the stairs and into the kitchen where the rest of her family was. It was currently two in the afternoon and everyone else was up, chatting to one another casually as if last night an explosive revelation hadn't befallen them. Maybe they just hadn't digested it; it hadn't sunk in. Or maybe they were so used to their lives being out of control, of crazy things happening that they just didn't care.
But Rosalie cared because Bella was her girlfriend.
"Well, good morning to you too," Emmett chuckled and raised a steaming mug of coffee in greeting at Rosalie's disheveled state. The blonde's hair was mussed up and she was still in her pjs. She had just woken up, too anxious last night for sleep to touch her. Only when the sun had come had she been able to get some rest but even then her sleep had been pitiful. She had been worried what the future of her and Bella's relationship was going to be. Would Carlisle break them up? Who knows.
"It's not a good morning," Rosalie growled and eyed Alice who was trying to hide her smirk behind a morning muffin as she sat on Jasper's lap, playing with his hair. "Where is she? Did you do something to her Alice?" Rosalie rounded on the girl, her anxiety increasing. Where was Bella? Was Bella mad at her? The girl was nowhere in the upstairs, her bed made and suitcases gone. And neither was she downstairs in the library. Rosalie had checked each location neurotically, running back and forth.
"Why do you accuse me first?" Alice batted her eyes and pretended to look hurt.
"Because you can never keep your mouth shut," Rosalie retorted.
"Rosalie," Esme turned away from where she had been tending the stove, moving the pancakes around. "There is no need to be this rude to your sister. She wasn't in any way responsible for your reprehensible actions."
"Because of her, everyone knows!" Rosalie pointed accusingly and childishly at the pixie. "They weren't supposed to know."
"You know you can't keep secrets in this household," Edward grumbled from where he was sitting at the counter eating cereal.
Rosalie grit her teeth, flexing her hands. A sudden thought hit her. "You. You talked to her last," she rounded on Esme who only arched a brow at the accusation.
"What did you tell her? What did you say to her? And where's Carlisle?" Rosalie just noticed her father was gone.
"He took Bella home."
"Why?"
"Because she didn't want to stay here any longer after I told her about Marie."
Rosalie paled at this. "You...you.." She couldn't even make her tongue work, so upset she was. She felt like she was going to lose control. Her vision blurred in and out. She grabbed onto the kitchen counter, Edward rising from his seat, concern and fear on his face. "Are you okay?" he touched her gently on the shoulder. She took in deep shuddering breaths, barely aware of his presence.
The happy relaxed mood in the kitchen had gone sour and all the Cullen's were on alert for Rosalie's next reaction. Jasper slide Alice off his lap and placed her strategically behind him. Emmett set down his mug and got up from his seat by the couple. Esme was the only one who didn't fear Rosalie's reactions. And that was because she knew she was top dog in the house.
"You told her...about me and Marie..."
"I told her how you abused her. I had to warn Bella. You may be my daughter but I will not have you ruining someone's life who is such a sweet individual."
At this Alice let out a sharp bark of laughter and Rosalie's body reacted in anger, grabbing the bowl of food Edward had been eating and flinging it at Alice's head. No one had been expecting her to move this quickly and the bowl struck Alice square in the face with a crunch followed by a smash as it broke on the floor, milk and cereal going everywhere. Red drops of crimson mixed in with the milk on the floor as Alice grabbed her broken nose and dropped to her haunches a wail of pain coming from her. There was a moment of stunned silence before the Cullen's sprang into action. Jasper knelt down by Alice, rubbing her shoulders as Alice cried.
"That bitch broke my nose! She broke my nose!"
Edward grabbed Rosalie's hands and pinned them behind her back but she wasn't planning on doing anymore. Emmett loomed in front of her, in case Edward couldn't hold her.
"Why'd you do that for Rosie?" Emmett asked in a hurt voice.
"Why did Esme tell Bella. Why?" Ripped out of Rosalie, the level of hurt and panic swirling inside her making it hard for her to tell if she wanted to break something or if she wanted to sit down and cry. Hurting Alice hadn't taken the edge off of her own pain.
"I'm sure there was a good reason. Now please try to calm down," Emmett insisted softly as Rosalie glared at him from under messy blonde strands.
"You didn't tell it right. You didn't tell her the whole truth! She doesn't know, she doesn't know why that happened." Rosalie threw this at Esme now, the caramel haired woman turning off the pancakes which she had calmly continued to make during this time. She slide them onto a plate. "So you'd rather I told her the whole horrific truth of the matter? You really think that would be more favorable than this outcome?"
"At least she would have all the facts. Whatever choice she made then, I could accept. Because she would be doing it fully informed. But like this...like this she only has a bad opinion of me."
Esme and Rosalie stared at each other silently, deciding what else needed to be said, only Alice's quiet sniffles breaking the glare.
"She needs to go get her nose set," Jasper urged, having pressed a towel to Alice's face, it soaked with red.
"Carlisle can do it when he comes back," Esme said softly, not even looking at Alice. Then with three quick strides forward she backhanded Rosalie across the face hard. Rosalie felt her lip split open, felt the heat of the hit. "And don't you dare raise a hand against your sister again," was the warning.
Rosalie righted her head, looking into her mother's eyes, letting the blood dribble down her lips. Esme's eyes were hard, daring Rosalie to challenge her.
"Of course not," Rosalie purred. "I wouldn't dream of hurting your precious angelic Alice." Alice never did any wrong in Esme's eyes. She was her perfect pretty little angel.
And Rosalie was the family blemish.
The Cullen's were going to spend three more days up here for vacation but for Rosalie those three days dragged on for months. She texted Bella every hour, asking her if she was okay, what was going on, that she missed her and loved her. But there was no response and it infuriated Rosalie. She was going out of her mind with worry and she would have already been in her car on her way to Bella if Carlisle hadn't taken away all the car keys. So she was stuck here until she could go back.
She wasn't able to enjoy the holidays, Christmas celebrations blurring past her in a haze. And Alice was a constant reminder of Rosalie's current position. She wore a plaster on her nose that made her look funny, and she would send the blonde nasty glares whenever she could, or stick out her tongue at her mockingly. This pissed Rosalie off more and she warned Alice that if she didn't stop that, her perfect teeth would be next.
Eventually the vacation ended and Rosalie bounced in her seat all the way back home. As soon as they pulled up to the Cullen mansion, she raced out of her car and threw all her belongings into her room and then rushed back out before anyone else had so much entered the house. Carlisle noticed her frenzy and placed a hand on her shoulder, stopping her.
"Rosalie," he spoke gently. He had been her biggest support during the wait, apologizing to her and helping her talk about what had occurred. "Do not be hasty. Give Bella some time. Don't act violently towards her."
"I'm not going to. I'm only going to tell her the truth. Because I think it's time she knows." Rosalie had never divulged to anyone outside of her family what had happened to her but she figured if she wanted Bella's trust...wanted her love...wanted a positive relationship than she owed her the truth.
It was possible that the truth could completely scare Bella away and if that was the case than Rosalie didn't know how she could deal with that. When the time came she'd think about it then.
Carlisle nodded his head. "A very mature decision. I'm proud of you. But please call me if anything goes wrong." He patted her on the shoulder and then let her get into her car. She drove out, tapping her thumbs nervously on the wheel. This was it, the make it or break it moment in her relationship.
When she got to the house she circled around to the back in order to climb up the drain pipe into the girl's room. Bella was sitting on the inside, reading a book at her desk. Rosalie's heart soared in nervousness and affection at the sight of the brunette, studiously peering at the text. She looked...normal. Like she was okay, like perhaps Esme's words hadn't ruffled her as much as Rosalie supposition they had. So maybe the talk would go normal. But only one way to find out...
Rosalie cracked the window open and slide in. Bella immediately bolted up out of her seat, eyes wide as Rosalie shut the window behind her. Rosalie felt hurt at the scared expression on the brunette's face. Hadn't she vowed that she would never terrify the brunette like that again? Hadn't she? But it wasn't my fault this time. But Esme's!
And now Rosalie had to amend the mess that she hadn't even made!
Rosalie held out her hands in a calm down gesture as she noticed the brunette slowly edging backwards to the door, her eyes furtively glancing at Rosalie then bouncing back to the door. She wet her lips, possibly debating if she wanted to scream or not.
"Bella, don't," Rosalie said in a soft voice. She hadn't moved from her spot by the window. Her figure blocked out the light, casting shadows all over Bella's face. "I just want to talk to you. And explain things."
"What more is there to say? It's all been said. I think it's pretty clear what you intend to do to me in this relationship."
"That's not true at all!" burst out of Rosalie a bit too loudly for Bella flinched back and took another two steps towards the door. Tsking angrily at her own inability to control the volume of her voice, Rosalie settled down once more, lowering her level. "I know it sounds all horrific. But Esme told you all this with breaking us up in mind. I promise I'm not going to hurt you. We've already gone through that cycle before even getting into the relationship, so there's no way I would make you go through that again."
"And how can I be so sure," Bella stated, pausing in her movements. It seemed she wanted to listen for now, but Rosalie knew that if she said so much as the wrong thing, Bella would head straight for the door and for her dad Charlie.
"You'll just have to trust me," Rosalie said, knowing there was no way the brunette would in this situation.
"I don't have any reason to right now. Did you know your mother gave me a taser to use on you? To protect myself?" Bella said this, almost looking revolted at the idea to the point of being sick.
Rosalie wanted to let out a long swear word but instead leaned against the cold window pane and crossed her arms over her chest. "She doesn't trust me like Carlisle does. She trusts me the least out of everyone. Because she loves Alice, adores her above the rest and she listens to Alice's toxicant words. So I'm sure Alice had some part in this, in manipulating Esme's increasing distrust of me. It's a pain in the ass, honestly," Rosalie sighed heavily and rubbed her eyes before continuing on. "But I'm not here to talk about my family. We both know how fucked up they are already. I came here to talk about me. To tell you the...truth at last." Rosalie swallowed at this, feelings nerves begin to make her hands shake.
"The truth...about you?" Bella seemed uncertain at the prospect.
"Yes. You know all of the Cullen's past, except for mine. So I'm going to tell you. Going to tell you what happened. I've never told anyone outside of my family this, as it pains me to do so, as I don't usually trust people outside of my family with such secrets. But I'm going to trust you, because I want you to trust me."
Bella nodded her head, urging Rosalie to continue.
The blonde cleared her throat and rolled her shoulders back, trying to imbue bravery into herself. For no matter how often she revisited this tale, it didn't make it easier to tell.
"Me and Jasper, who happens to be my biological brother, lived in an orphanage for most of our young lives. Our parents had abandoned us because they were dirt poor and couldn't afford to feed us. So they figured the orphanage would be a better place. A place where they could keep us safe until they made enough money to be able to raise us properly. But the place was horrible. A true nightmare. There was never any food to go around, never enough blankets or water, or toys. All the kids would always be turned against each other, be forced to fight for the bare essentials; for survival. It was a cut throat place, and I thought it had been bad. But the orphanage was going to be a luxury compared to what was going to happen next." At this Rosalie took a deep breath, her eyes having lowered to the floor unconsciously as she told this tale. She brought them back up, leveling them at Bella's face. So far the brunette looked calm. No doubt she had heard of this part from Jasper so it wasn't much of a shock.
"I was eventually adopted, as it became clear that my parents wouldn't ever be back, and this...man," Rosalie couldn't help from snarling, her body revolting at even addressing him as such. He deserved to be called a monster, a beast, a stain on humanity! She struggled with the anger and revulsion that swirled inside her. "He was the one who adopted me. At first I was fooled by what I thought was the twinkle of kindness in his eyes, of the warm smile he wore. But he was just a snake. And he was doing some of the most vile things on Earth."
"Like what?" Bella softly blurted out, curiosity and a look of impending doom on her face.
"He ran a child fighting ring," Rosalie said in one long breath before she gave a humorless chuckle. "I know, it sounds ridiculous, funny even. Insane perhaps. You wouldn't expect such things to exist, but they do. He ran an underground fighting ring where he would have scores of kids fight each other for the entertainment of scum who would come and watch. A lot of money was bet, between fights. He got very filthy rich off of it. While the kids all suffered.
"All these kids that he found, were poor, unloved by anyone else, abandoned. So no one would care if they died or if they lived. All that mattered is that they won the match no matter what, so that he could reap the benefits of it."
At this Rosalie's mind started to slip back into a flashback. Her first day seeing the ring for the first time, as he gave her a tour around the place. It was dark and damp and it smelled heavily of smoke and blood. There was a crowd of roaring men who were screaming at the kids in the middle of the rink, as the two young boys circled each other around, looking for a good way to put an end to the fight. Rosalie had been mixed with a feeling of intense horror and disgust. This was where she was going to go next, this was what she was going to have to do, as the man not so kindly pointed out to her.
A loud roar filled the air as one of the boys lunged forward and hit the other in the face, blood splattering all over the mud of the inner ring. She cringed at the loud volume of it before a hard grip on her thin shoulders steered her away.
Rosalie forced herself out of her thoughts when she realized Bella had asked her a question.
"Who would even go to see such horrid things?" her face looked pale.
Rosalie shrugged. "Sick people. There's plenty of them in this world. Just wanting to watch small kids beat each other up to fulfill their sick desires."
"I had to go into that rink many a time. Too many times. I received some basic training from the man so that I wouldn't be completely useless in the rink but it still didn't make it anymore painful or scary to go in there. Each fight was a fight for survival, because if I didn't win then he would get mad and reduce my food rations, or make me do some sort of punishment task that he concocted. And each fight was different. Some kids were out for the kill, wouldn't stop pummeling until you were dead. Other kids were a laugh, not even worth the breath in my lungs to beat. Eventually I got used to it, to the feel of bones under my hands, to the jeers of the crowd, to the taste of blood, to the ache of bruises and bites. They became my dearest friends. My companions. For I had no friends in that place. We were all just fuel for the fire and we couldn't trust each other because we could never know if the other was trying to sabotage us for the battle. I remember one kid tried to take out my eye with a rusty spoon," Rosalie gave a wry smile at this, watching Bella's face turn a bit green.
"But...Marie was different. She came into that hopeless world and she gave me hope. She was my friend," here Rosalie's voice cracked a bit with emotion and she took a breath to regain stability. "She didn't care if we had to fight each other. She didn't care about winning. Whenever we faced each other in the rink, she would let me win, heedless of the consequences that awaited her for doing something like this. She was unfailingly optimistic. And she made me get out of my depressed runt. She made me realize that there was hope. That I could escape. Could get my life back from this horrid place. We planned our escape together.
"But...we never made it. Because we were found out. And...and they made us fight each other. With knives." Rosalie's voice dropped down at this, refusing to let sadness infuse it. She was done pitying herself. It wouldn't change anything in the past anyways. "It was the fight of the night. Everyone came to watch it. I was either to kill her, or she to kill me. But I couldn't do it. I couldn't. So she did it for me."
Numb. Rosalie felt like she was going numb. She couldn't meet Bella's eyes anymore. Yet she intoned on. She had gotten this far. She could go further. The flash of dim arena lights filled her vision and screams and chants of excitement assaulted her ears. The glint of knives shinning brightly. Rosalie's hands sweaty and feet cold, chest heaving up and down in dread. And Marie in front of her. Serene. Because she had just made a life changing choice. One that would alter both of their lives for good.
"I'll save us both the pain. I hope you make it out of her alive." Those had been Marie's last parting words before she had lifted the knife on herself.
Rosalie could only remember screaming and screaming until her throat was sore, the man dragging her off the stage and shaking his head in disappointment at the lackluster battle. Marie's body lay forgotten in the dust. Just another kid who had fallen victim to the rink.
"So Esme blames me for that girl's death. As well as blames me for all the other kids in the rink who I hurt. I went mad with grief. Had to funnel my pain out some way. And if I couldn't get my hands on the man, then I would get it on my opponents. I became quite feared in the rink. Because I wouldn't stop going no matter what, until I won. My only friend was gone. My only hope was gone. I had no home to escape to, so I might as well make it large in the only future that awaited me. A life of the rink.
"And you, Bella. You reminded me of that girl. And I took out my anger at her on you. Because I had loved her but she had done this to me. She had robbed me of her presence in my life. We could have found a way out of that death battle. We could have made a life out there in the world if only we tried hard enough. But she had no hope because she had given all of it to me, so I could be somewhat happy in that abysmal world. And it had ruined her in the end. I had ruined the only thing I had ever had that was good to me, and I hadn't even known it.
"So I was very upset. Upset at her. And I projected that on you. But while I was mad, I was also...happy. Happy to have her back in a sort of twisted way. In the form of you." Now the words came more easily to Rosalie. The hardest part was over. She could breath easy. "For I still loved her. And that's why I pursued you in such a sick and twisted way. It was wrong of me to do so, but I've never been the most stable of people. And I know you must think that I'm only using you to fulfill some childhood crush that ended cruelly. But that isn't true. Not at all." Rosalie said this vehemently, for she truly meant what she was saying. "I love you for who you are. I love you for all your silly little quirks. I am no longer infatuated with her. For you have replaced her in my heart. You're different than her. You're Bella," Rosalie concluded with finality. She looked up to see that Bella was entirely frozen, tears having streamed down her face. She looked horrified and upset and sad and pitying all at the same time.
Rosalie didn't want to see pity. She really didn't want to.
She got up, having somehow ended up sitting on the windowsill. "So that's the true extent of the story. Esme didn't tell you anything because she figured it wasn't important to. She just wanted you away from me because of who you reminded me of. And she thought I was only going to take out my issues on you." Rosalie shook her head in disbelief at this. "Anyways, I'm going to go now. I'm going to give you time to think this over. To decide if you still want to date me. If you don't then..." Rosalie sucked her bottom lip into her mouth. "Then that's fine. I'll live." With that she turned her back on the still silent Bella and opened the window and was gone.
A/N: Hadn't really meant for this chapter to be from Rosalie's POV entirely but it sort of wrote itself like this. And I guess it makes sense; makes it more suspenseful and uncertain if Bella will accept her or not. And Rosalie is talking about her past here so its easier to write it from her view.