"Oh I'm so excited to be here," said the Doctor, giddily running down Main Street to peer into every window. "I haven't been here since I was a man."
John and Sara looked at each other, eyebrows raised in confusion. This Doctor woman was certainly an odd character, and neither had quite figured out what was going on.
"Mind you, it's awfully quiet," said the Doctor, looking around. "Place like this, day before it opened, it should be swarming with people."
"Maybe they're on a lunch break?" asked Sara.
"All at the same time?" replied the Doctor. "No, whatever is affecting history is clearly a powerful entity."
"What do we say if we do meet someone?" asked Constantine. "A couple of Brits walking around is surely going to raise a few eyebrows."
"Oh I'm sure I'll come up with some sort of brilliant lie," said the Doctor cheerily. "I always do. Say, do you think we can get some candy floss while we're here?"
"So what are we looking for exactly, Doctor?" asked Sara.
"Oh, you know," said the Doctor. "Anything, you know, odd."
"Like an angry man stomping towards us, ready to give us a piece of his mind?"
"That would be literally the perfect thing in this situa-oh," the Doctor turned away from admiring a shop window to see the man standing in front of her.
"Roy Disney," she said with a smile, grabbing the man's hand and shaking it. "Oh it has been too long. I think I was... no, wait, don't tell me, I was definitely taller, with curlier hair. Am I right?"
"Who are you people?" Roy asked angrily.
"Well I'm the Doctor, obviously," said the Doctor. "And these are my companions."
"Charmed," said Constantine, tapping his head.
"What's going on here?" asked Sara, trying to get to the point.
"Oh that's what I like about you Sara," said the Doctor. "Keep note John, you could learn a thing or two from her about proper companioning. Yes, what is going on here Roy? Where is everyone?"
"They're indisposed," said Roy, trying to gain a hold of the conversation.
"Are they now?" said the Doctor, eyeing the man carefully. "Here we were thinking they were on some sort of lunch break. I think you better let us see them, since we're doctors, and they might need our help."
"Doctors?"
"Well I'm more a dabbler," said John with a smirk.
"So where are they all, hmm?" said the Doctor, walking behind Roy, lost in her own mind. "Operation this big, they must all be somewhere. Can't be dead, that'd have made the news. And why are you the only one walking around? No, this is all very unlikely."
"I think you better come with me," said Roy testily.
"In a minute," said the Doctor, waving her hand dismissively. "I'm trying to work out what's going on. Always helps to figure out the bad guy's evil plan before doing anything rash."
"Doctor," Sara said warily, as suddenly costumed characters started to exit the shops and stalk towards them.
"Hmm? Oh, that doesn't help matters," said the Doctor, before pausing. She suddenly spun round and, without warning, kissed Roy Disney square on the lips. She stepped back, licking her own lips, before breaking into a smile.
"Well that certainly clears a lot of things up," she said happily, before looking apologetic. "Sorry, that was rude of me, it was just the easiest way of checking short of just outright asking you."
"Asking him what?" asked John.
"Oh, Roy here is made of plastic," the Doctor said casually. "Lack of sweat, slight jerkiness of the motions, not to mention the smell... Still, one shouldn't go round making presumptions without first checking."
"Doctor!" Sara said more urgently, drawing her batons as the costumed characters got ever closer.
"So if you're plastic, that could only mean... Oh, are you Autons? Autons in Disneyland? Oh that'd be brilliant if not so awful."
"Take them," said Roy angrily, his own hand morphing into a flat blade.
"Oh, you're the lead one, are ya?" the Doctor asked, backing up. "Took special care when it came to making you it seemed. Oh, heads up gang, I think we should be running."
"First thing you've said that's made sense," said John, backing away from the costumed characters. The fake, seemingly frozen faces of the characters suddenly morphed and changed into twisted, somewhat demonic images, as they opened their mouths to let out a roar.
"Oh, they're Autons too," said the Doctor. "That's actually pretty clever, got to give them props for that."
"So they're not human?" asked Sara.
"More of a living plastic controlled by a central consciousness," replied the Doctor.
"Excellent," said Sara, twirling her batons, facing the nearest one. "Sorry Mickey," she said, before swinging her baton, knocking the head off the creature.
Unfortunately this did little to stop its advanced, as it clambered forward. Sara, undeterred, continued to keep fighting the approaching horde.
The Doctor, meanwhile, was attempting to protect John from the approaching Roy Disney while he continued to incite his spell. This protection, for want of a better word, mostly consisted of her distracting the robot by waving her sonic screwdriver around and keeping out of arm's reach of his blades.
"If you could hurry the incantation up," said the Doctor, ducking under a swing by the Auton, glad of all the time she'd taken boxing lessons from Muhammad Ali.
"I could also use a hand," said Sara, ducking under Donald Duck's grasp and kicking him to the curb.
"Get near me," said Constantine. The Doctor and Sara called off their battle in order to stand next to the man, bodies poised to fight, as he continued to recite.
"Any moment now John," said the Doctor, as Sara blocked a blow from Roy and kicked him backwards.
"Dissipati peribunt!" concluded John Constantine. An orange circle filled with strange runes suddenly appeared around them, before there was a blinding flash of white light.