Disclaimer: Me no own Harry Potter yet. Someday. Highly unlikely, but a girl can dream.
Author's Note:
HELLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, EVERYONE!
On a scale of 1-10, I was a full blown 11 when it came to writing that scene between the Twins and Hayden. I was so gosh damn excited the whole time. PHEW. I almost gave myself Anxiety as I was working on it last week.
Future chapters are going to be so TENSEEEE. AOWEIBFONASJBFIPBGO{NDBN
Also a warning: SWEARINGGGGG. I know in the Harry Potter series there was very little swearing, but I feel like girls can say some very nasty and disgusting things to rile up another person when they're angry enough.
On another side note: I recently started watching Tokyo Ghoul at the desperate request of my best friend and oh my God. I cannot believe this anime was created. It horrifies me, but I really really like it so far. Uta is my favoriteeeeee. *Hearts* I immediately started looking for stories on him on this site and was disappointed by the lack of them. I've been seriously contemplating creating a story with him and Hayden later on once this story starts wrapping up. *Hums thoughtfully*
Please enjoy this new chapter, everyone! ONWARD!
No Promises.
Chapter E.I.G.H.T
_"Permission"_
"Ever-changing shapes, showing us our endless possibilities, as waves we come and go, as waves we expand and flow, be the ever-changing wave that always carries the ocean of love within." -Roxana Jones
Call it cowardly of me, but I wasn't prepared to look at the Twins after what occurred Saturday night. I knew I was more than likely overreacting. I was the only one here blowing that whole incident out of proportion compared to the Twins, who were their normal selves, but that didn't stop my thoughts from going back to behind the tapestry, the two warm bodies that had been pressed far too intimately against me to be entirely platonic, and the rush of emotions that had flooded me.
I was never a girl who was interested in relationships or boyfriends. It seemed like I never had the time to give someone else my attention when I can barely keep myself out of trouble. I quite frankly didn't care for it, but if a guy admitted to showing an interest and wanted to go on a date, I'd give the poor bloke a chance. I was a bitch, but I'd give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he had seen something in me that I didn't, which was something I had trouble believing. However, a part of me knew what was going on with the Twins and what I was feeling
I knew, but I wasn't ready to totally analyze it yet. I wasn't ready to confront those feelings and admit them. I firmly believed I was just overthinking and needed some space to forget. Hence why the Twins hadn't seen not even a strand of hair from me since Saturday, which, according to Lavender and Parvati, was driving them crazy because they've been trying to hunt me down and have had no luck finding me.
I spent four years off their radar. I had no problems disappearing off of it again when I needed space. But I felt guilty for doing it. For all I know, they could just be wanting to talk or make plans for pranks or tease me. They probably weren't even overly concerned about Saturday because in their minds, we were just hiding from a Professor to avoid getting in trouble for being out past curfew. They weren't coming to the conclusions I was and they most certainly weren't acting childish like I was. It was all just one big gigantic headache.
In short, I was losing my mind over this and it was making me immensely frustrated.
I skipped breakfast entirely, hiding out in the girls dorm for all of History of Magic. Binns rarely took attendance anymore and he could never remember my name anyway. I wasn't too concerned with skipping his class since we were focusing on the Giant Wars all of this year, which wasn't hard to study. Potions, however, wasn't something I ever intended to skip, so I took secret passageways all the way down to the dungeons to avoid being seen.
"You will notice," Snape said in his low, sneering voice, "that we have a guest with us today." Said guest was entirely unwanted in this particular class, but there she was, sitting in a dim corner of the dungeon with her clipboard on her knee. The other Gryffindors were probably struggling to decide who they liked best, Umbridge or Snape, but I had no trouble picking Snape as the better option since he was civil to me and definitely not an obstacle to me learning Defensive spells in a class.
"We are continuing with our Strengthening Solutions today, you will find your mixtures as you left them last lesson, if correctly made they should have matured well over the weekend. Your instructions," He waved his wand, "are on the board. Carry on."
"Poor Neville," Lavender muttered. Parvati nodded solemnly, casting small glances at the stony-faced boy who sat at the table diagonally from us with Dean and Seamus. "I wonder what got him so riled up with Malfoy like that? I've never seen him look so angry."
While I was silently wondering the same thing, I could only conjure up loose ideas that mainly centered around the last thing Malfoy had said. I had been right beside Neville before he had charged at the blond and he had looked unfazed by everything he was saying until he got to the part about St. Mungo's. That had gotten a nasty snarl on Neville's normally kind face. It wasn't the prettiest thought, but if my conclusions were true, Neville had someone in St. Mungo's who had been magically hurt. And it had to be someone he was close to for him to react like that.
"Snape's coming," I said, distracting them from gazing at Neville and quickly turning to their work. Snape stopped close to my cauldron as I held a small vile of Salamander Blood over the potion, checking the book before tipping a couple drops into the liquid, promptly turning it turquoise. I could faintly hear Hermione growling at Harry behind me for almost making a mistake and held back a laugh. Someone was distracted today.
"Very good, Miss. Walters," Snape praised quietly, dark eyes critically looking over my potion as I stirred it gently, "though a thought for next time you brew this potion: three drops is adequate, but four makes it stronger and more effective."
Taking the praise and the critique gracefully, I replied, "Yes, sir. Thank you." A Gryffindor getting a praise out of this man was like pulling teeth, but I was proud none the less. I was doing something right with him at least.
"Is this a difficult potion to brew, Miss. Walters?" I nearly faltered in my counter-clockwise stirring switch when Umbridge's sweet voice came from behind me.
"No, Ma'am," I said as truthfully as I could. The only difficult thing about this potion was the picky stirring directions, but that was about it. "Everything is in the book and it's a step-by-step instruction. It's not that hard to follow."
She sidled up to my side, beady eyes narrowed on my potion and clipboard poised at the ready. I saw Snape narrow his eyes at her and nearly flinched. I did not want to be in the middle of these two Professors. "Is that so?" She demurred thoughtfully. "Do you think the curriculum is too hard for a fifth year?"
"No," I denied pointedly. "Professor Snape is right to challenge us with these types of potions if we want to be prepared for our exam and for our sixth year." I couldn't stop my mouth from moving some more. "If we can't handle what Professor Snape gives us, then we don't deserve to be in his N.E.W.T. class next year." Parvati inhaled sharply, dark eyes staring at me curiously and obviously wondering what was going through my head.
Umbridge leaned away from me, thankfully, with pursed lips like I had said the complete opposite of what she had wanted. I probably had and felt no shame for it either. "Well, the class seems fairly advanced for their level," She said briskly to Snape, who was standing stiff on my other side. "Though I would question whether it is advisable to teach them a potion like the Strengthening Solution. I think the Ministry would prefer it if that was removed from the syllabus."
Irritation burned brightly as she disregarded everything I had just said. It felt like she was purposefully trying to nail Snape for being incompetent, which, despite his attitude and cold words, he was far from. Snape blinked slowly at her and didn't deign her with a response.
"Now, how long have you been teaching at Hogwarts?" She asked, quill poised over her clipboard.
"Fourteen years," Snape replied with his usual sneer tempered down somewhat. Umbridge barely even noticed, meticulously circling the tall man as her quill scratched across parchment.
"You applied first for the Defense Against the Dark Arts post, is that correct?"
"Yes." Only I seemed to notice the barely there twitch in Snape's confirmation, like he was holding back from full on sneering at the toad. Lavender gave a small cringe and shrank closer to Parvati, who was watching the scene wide-eyed.
"But you were unsuccessful?" She asked with a simpering tone, sounding sympathetic.
"Obviously." Someone held back a snigger from behind me, barely suppressing the noise that seemed to echo in the now suddenly silent dungeon. I almost turned around to hiss at Ron, knowing it was him who found enjoyment in this. It was far from funny to me right now.
"And you have applied regularly for the Defense Against the Dark Arts post since you first joined the school, I believe?"
"Yes," Snape said quietly, barely moving his lips. He looked very angry.
"Do you have any idea why Dumbledore has consistently refused to appoint you?" Umbridge asked. She was treading into more personal territory and I wondered if she was really within her rights to question Snape so familiarly like this.
"I suggest you ask him," Snape said jerkily, dark eyes glinting.
"Oh, I shall," She said sweetly, not looking up at him.
"I suppose this is relevant?" Snape asked with narrowed eyes.
Umbridge finally looked at him, smile still firmly in place. "Oh yes. Yes, the Ministry wants a thorough understanding of teachers'...well, backgrounds." Snape was stiff as a board as he glared at the smaller woman, lips curled unpleasantly. Did Snape have some bad history with the Ministry? The nosy part of me was curious and wanted to know, but I mercilessly stomped that urge away. No way was I going snooping into Snape's history. The man was way too scary to try and do that kind of background digging.
But I can't just sit here and let her use Snape's history against him. It was far from my business and while the man would scorn the help, I had no qualms with calling her out on her bullshit.
I gently placed down my stirring rod, casting a Stasis Charm on the potion to keep it from ruining. "If that was true, Professor, then why didn't you do the same to Professor Trelawney and Professor Grubbly-Plank?" I had overheard Dean talking to Seamus a while back about Umbridge's inspection of Harry's Care of Magical Creatures class and was far from amused.
Umbridge looked at me like I had just spouted off a foreign language to her. "I beg your pardon, dear?"
"Why didn't you do the same for Trelawney and Grubbly-Plank?" I repeated slowly. "I was in Divination the day you came to inspect us and you never said anything to Professor Trelawney about why and how she was hired. It seems unreasonable and unfair to grade our Potions Professor like this when you didn't do the same for the others just because you have some dirt on him."
Snape gave me a very blank stare, pinning me in my seat with the force of his stare. Umbridge was still for a whole minute before she leaned close to my face with narrowed eyes and a frown on her toad-like mouth. "Are you the Hogwarts High Inquisitor, Miss. Walters?" She asked carefully.
I gave her my best sneer, not really caring if I was being highly disrespectful to a teacher. "No, but I'm sure I could do better than you." This time, a chorus of gasps echoed in the room. Out of the corner of my eye, blond hair and a pale pointed face was staring holes into my cheek.
Umbridge stood up sharply. "Detention, Miss. Walters," She snapped. "My office. Tomorrow night at five. Don't be late." That said, she stormed out of the classroom in a flurry of pink, slamming the door behind her. No one in the class dared to speak or even breath loudly until I huffed and crossed my arms, scowling at my cauldron full of turquoise Strengthening Solution.
This was just fucking lovely.
"Get back to work," Snape ordered, thankfully tearing his gaze off of me. His hand slid over my Potions book, long fingers latching onto the edge and taking it with him as he silently glided past me. Black robes had barely gotten past my peripherals before a resounding smack was heard and loud laughter from the Slytherin tables was heard. Seems like Snape had heard Ron's poor excuse of muffled laughter earlier.
"No marks again, then, Potter," Snape snapped maliciously as a strong smell of burned rubber wafted over to me. I gagged and hastily covered my nose with my sleeve as Lavender and Parvati's faces turned green and their noses wrinkled. They hurried to follow my example. "You will write me an essay on the correct composition of this potion, indicating how and why you went wrong, to be handed in next lesson, do you understand?"
"Yes," Harry growled furiously. Snape slipped the book back beside me as he marched by, the book falling back open to the page for brewing the Strengthening Solution.
"What was that about?" Lavender hissed at me once Snape was out of earshot. "Since when do you defend Snape of all people from Umbridge?"
"Who would you rather be stuck with, Snape or Umbridge?" I snapped out. "I don't know about you, but I'd rather have Snape here than Umbridge. At least with him, I know I'll be able to ask questions without getting a detention for hinting at something he doesn't want to hear."
An hour later had everyone rushing out of the classroom after bombarding Snape with their vials of potions with me being in the back and still in a horrible mood. The vial barely left my hands before Snape spoke.
"I never took you to be the impulsive type, Miss. Walters," Snape said, examining me shrewdly as he levitated my potion to sit with the rest on a shelf behind him.
I gritted my teeth, but I forced my tone to be somewhat polite. "I'm normally not, sir."
"Then what made you act out so childishly today?" This felt like 21 Questions and I hated it. Hailey loved this game, but it only served to irritate more than amuse me.
"I don't like her," I admitted gruffly, scowling mightily at the black-haired man. He rested his chin on his interlocked hands and waited. He didn't have to wait long before I caved and elaborated some more. "She's hurting the students, sir," I said angrily. "She refuses to teach us Defensive magic and just expects us to go into our O.W.L. with just the theory down. She's being completely unfair—"
"And why are you under the assumption that she was going to be fair from the beginning?" Snape interrupted. I blinked at him.
"I never assumed that she—"
"You're contradicting yourself, Walters," Snape snapped sharply. I cringed. "By far, you are one of the more mature students in my fifth year classes that I've seen, but after today, I think you need to open your eyes some more and face the reality that's in front of you. Getting a detention for sassing a Professor is immature and beneath you."
This was a talk that I should be hearing from McGonagall as she was my Head of House. Sure, I'd get a revised version of it from other teachers, but ultimately, McGonagall was the one who is supposed to be putting me in my place for the stunt I had just pulled in a classroom full of gossiping kids. Instead, I was hearing it from Snape, who wasn't my Head of House, who wouldn't hold back to insult my behavior and who, in a roundabout way, is telling me to do better.
Feeling embarrassed, I bowed my head. "Yes, sir."
"Good. I expect better in the next class lesson from you."
I had somehow managed to convince Terra to skip dinner with the promise of raiding the kitchens with her later to make up for it. I could hear the Twins over the roar of the dinner crowd and still wasn't feeling comfortable enough to go in an act like everything was as fine as can be. She wasn't very happy, knowing my reasons for it after spilling my guts out to her Sunday afternoon as we were working on the Summoning Charm again, but quickly got over it when she heard Roger Davies march past, loudly proclaiming to his friend that he was somehow going to convince Umbridge to reinstate the Ravenclaw Quidditch team.
"It's just Quidditch. What's the big deal? It's not the end of the world if there's no Quidditch for a year."
"It's not just for a year. Umbridge could ban Gryffindor for Quidditch for life if she stuck around."
"Semantics. It's just Quidditch. They're not going to die if they can't fly around throwing balls at each other and catching a flying, gold, golf-sized ball every couple weeks."
"Don't let any of them hear you say that."
The whole school was in an uproar over Umbridge's Educational Degree. There were many complaints and many meetings with Heads of Houses to see if this could actually be happening or if it was fair. I snorted when I heard that excuse from a Ravenclaw third year. It didn't have to be fair. Umbridge had that power and she was exercising it well. Many clubs were scrambling to get reinstated, but if you were a particular annoyance to the woman, said club would be held over your head while she "took some time to think over reinstating it". Angelina was a mute corpse after that specific meeting.
Tensions ran higher when Malfoy proclaimed, quite loudly, before Potions this morning about how Slytherin's Quidditch team was already back in business because he got express permission from her at breakfast. The nasty gestures Harry and Ron sent him after restraining Neville from attacking Malfoy earned them both a detention with Snape and twenty points lost for both boys.
"Besides that, who do you think told her?" Terra leaned closer to me as we idled outside the Great Hall. Dinner was coming to a slow end as students trickled out of the Hall, weighed down by heavy bags and full stomachs. She glared at a nosy Ravenclaw fourth year, who had looked interested in our talk, until he hurried up the stairs to Ravenclaw Tower.
I arched an eyebrow. "Told who?"
"Umbridge, you dolt!" Terra hissed, aggravated. "This can't just be coincidence that she passes an Educational Decree banning clubs after we've just had a meeting about forming one!"
"Calm down," I soothed her, detaching her hands from her robes as she wrung the fabric tightly in her fists. "You give Hermione too little credit. If I know her style as well as I think I do by now, she would have probably been notified if someone had went to Umbridge by some handy spell she randomly memorized and she'd have told everyone by now."
Terra breathed a sigh, running a hand through her hair. Normally straight hair was messy and had snarls from no doubt running her fingers through it all day. "I don't want to get caught in this," She whispered. She suddenly looked more tired than I had ever seen her. "My Mom's not in the Ministry, but she will be furious if she hears I was part of some resistance." I noted how she never mentioned her Father, but didn't press that subject.
"Trust Hermione to have a backup plan," I said, trying to reassure her. "Everything will be fine so long as we're careful."
"And what," Terra's eyes widened and I felt my heart instantly pick up speed as I turned, "would you have to be careful about, Miss. Walters?" Snape slowly looked between the two of us, clearly expecting an answer. He still looked to be in a mood after Umbridge's inspection this morning for his class. Not that I blamed him. Umbridge had been delving a bit too close to home when she had interrogated him.
While we had our little heart to heart earlier, Snape was still someone who was very low on the list of people to know about the Defense group we were trying to form.
"Practicing the Summoning Charm for Professor Flitwick, sir," I lied as smoothly as I could, hoping beyond hope that he had only heard the latter part of our conversation. My stomach turned at the lie, but I forced my face to remain honest and open. I should've had Terra do the talking. She was a better liar than I will ever be. "I've been struggling with it for awhile and Terra said she'd be willing to help me get the hang of it."
Snape slowly arched an eyebrow and I feared he didn't believe me. "I see," He said. I almost relaxed, but stopped when he continued. "Take care that nothing of the school is permanently damaged, Miss. Walters, Miss. Blanc." I stepped to the side as he breezed past us into the Great Hall, a crowd of students parting like the Red Sea for him as he headed straight for the Headmaster, who was sitting at the staff table in robes of sparkling blue and green.
"That man is way too observant," Terra muttered, watching him go.
I nodded in agreement, heart still racing, but slowly going back to normal. "I agree."
Terra's face suddenly lit up and she turned to me with urgency. "Is Finny okay?"
I blinked, confused. "Yes? I sent a short letter to my sister yesterday morning, so he's out right now. I don't see why he wouldn't be, though. Why do you ask?"
Terra grabbed the sleeve of my robes, tugging me around the corner and into an empty classroom. I sat on top of one of the desks while Terra copied me, sitting across from me. "Potter tried hiding it, but I saw him making a break for the staff lounge this morning during first core with his owl in his arms."
"Was Hedwig hurt?" I asked alarmed, nearly toppling myself off my desk in shock.
"I couldn't see her very well," Terra said, face scrunching up. "She was on his other shoulder, but it looked like her wings were bent weirdly."
"That's awful," I whispered, suddenly fearful for Finny. Sassy owl that he was, he was still just an owl and if something was attacking the incoming owls, I feared for his safety. "I hope he'll make it back during tomorrow's mail rush. He's always been a fast flier and I'll be worried if it takes him more than a day or two to get back to me."
Terra sat up straight, eyes flashing confidently. "I think it was Umbridge."
I didn't rebuke that accusation, merely glanced at her curiously. I had my suspicions that Umbridge would be suspicious of what the students were sending and receiving from home, though I had expected it to be later on when she had a firmer grasp on the school. If she hadn't been here, my next guess would've been the Thestrals, but Hagrid had those gentle creatures trained very well and I didn't doubt the man when it came to his magical creatures. "You believe it was her?"
"I do," Terra said adamantly, daring me to say otherwise. "Filch has taken to that vile woman and follows her around like a lost dog looking for its owner. I wouldn't put it past her to have him check all the owls before the students get them." Her expression darkened. "I've also seen him haunting the upper floors of the Owlery the past couple days I've gone out there to loan a school owl."
"Hedwig must have given him a bit of a fight," I said thoughtfully, accepting her thoughts readily, "especially if you say her feathers were bent." I looked up. "What do you suggest we do if we can't send out mail so readily anymore?"
Terra bit her lip. "Why not instruct Finny to come to Ravenclaw Tower to deliver your mail?" She asked. I gazed at her in surprise and she quickly said, "I'm just saying that since Umbridge is watching Harry so closely, that also means she might be watching Gryffindor in general just as closely. She'll know if owl post is coming and going from the Tower sooner or later. Not many of my House has been on her radar so far, so I think it'll be safer for Finny to slip into my room until morning so that Filch won't grab him."
I didn't hesitate with my answer. "That's wonderful!" I exclaimed, grinning. "That's a great idea, Terra. I would really appreciate it if you don't mind any, especially since I'm now on Umbridge's hit list for the year and might be getting detention for awhile."
She snorted, but her cheeks were bright pink in the fading sunset light that streamed in from the open window. "You dolt, I wouldn't suggest it if I thought it would hinder me. Pay attention more." She paused before she rounded on me furiously. "You got detention?!" She hissed. "For what?!"
"I insulted her," I said simply, not really wanting to recall everything that had happened this morning in Potions. I didn't really want to talk about the talk Snape had given me and I didn't want Terra to jump to conclusions on why the Potions Professor was suddenly being all buddy buddy with a Gryffindor of all people.
Terra groaned, covering her face exasperatedly with her hands. "You need to keep your mouth shut," She bemoaned. The scars on her hand, completely healed, shone back at me mockingly and my stomach clenched when I realized I would quickly have something similar on my hand by tomorrow night. "I wouldn't push a Black Quill on anyone, not even Malfoy. It's awful."
I shrugged my shoulders in an attempt to diffuse the tension in my body. "I'm not going to apologize for it. Someone had to call her out."
She dropped her hands and glared fiercely at me with stormy blue eyes. "Your Gryffindor bravery is what's going to get you killed one day." I couldn't stop the shiver that tracked down my spine. I didn't like how ominous she had made that sound. "You're a student. Leave the calling out shit to the Professors. If you want to get back at her, do it discreetly."
I waved my hands at her in a placating manner. "Yes, Mother."
"Why would you do that?"
"I was trying to fix what that fool almost ruined for us."
"You almost exposed yourself."
"But I didn't. Isn't that all that matters to you?"
"It's more than that, you little fool. Do they suspect us?"
"No."
"You're positive?"
"Of course I am."
"I expect better next time. Make no more mistakes. I don't tolerate such failure from you of all people, Bright Eyes."
"You don't have the right to call me that. Don't worry about me. Worry about yourself and what's with you."
"You gave us quite the show there, Walters." Pansy was waiting for me around the corner of the intersection Terra and I usually separated at. She was leaning against the wall with one ankle crossed over the other and arms folded over her chest, attempting to look cool and nonchalant. I thought she looked ridiculous and completely uncomfortable.
"What are you talking about now, Parkinson?" I asked, not really in the mood to trade words with a Slytherin. Bulstrode and Davies were hovering behind her, Tracey looking this way and that as if expecting a teacher to come storming towards us and Bulstrode looking for all the world like she was searching for a fight. Pansy straightened herself, arms still crossed and shoulders pulled back. She looked taller than normal and I cursed my short height.
Of course, someone like Pansy couldn't intimidate me with just her height. Having height on me didn't mean jack shit. I already knew I was faster than her if she tried pulling punches and that was especially true when it came to magic. She knew I had her in both areas, so I wasn't sure what it was exactly that she was trying to pull.
"Potions, you filthy commoner," She insulted, rolling her eyes like I had just asked a stupid question. My eye twitched violently and I resisted the urge to send a nasty Leg-Locker curse at her.
"It's almost curfew, Parkinson," I stated sarcastically. "You waited until now to ask me about a class from earlier this morning? What's your motive for waiting so long?"
She ignored my questions, which stroked my irritation to no end. "I should be asking you that. You have no reason to defend Snape like you did."
"You're cornering me because you're suspicious why a Gryffindor is favoring the Head of Slytherin House?" I snorted derisively. "Get your priorities straight, Puginson. The real question here is why none of you Slytherins were taking the initiative that I was."
Memories of Elliot flood back and I found that it was hard to keep that same mindset for him with Pansy. To me, Elliot was the more innocent aspect of Slytherin. He was innocently ambitious, seeming to want to reach for greater things without doing harm with that knowledge and knowing where to go to get that knowledge even if it wasn't easily in his reach. With Pansy...she took the self-preservation aspect of Slytherin to a higher extreme than should even be necessary. Selfishness was a common human weakness, but she had way too much of it in this instance if she was questioning my loyalty as a Gryffindor.
Being Gryffindor didn't mean I couldn't take pity on a Slytherin or sticking up for one even if he didn't want it.
Her lips curled into a snarl. My wand was wrapped around my fingers in seconds as Bulstrode took some steps towards me, looking furious as I pointed the tip at her threateningly. "Our Head of House doesn't need help from children against someone like Umbridge," Pansy said shortly, words laced with venom.
"I was hardly helping him," I retorted, eyes firmly latched onto Bulstrode and Davies. Pansy was hardly the threat right now since her back up was more keen on attacking me than she actually was. "Umbridge needed to be put in her place."
"You're out of line!" Bulstrode growled harshly, teeth bared. "You filthy Mudblood, watch your mouth on who you're insulting!"
"Watch your own mouth!" I bared my own straight teeth at her, anger coursing through my veins. I hated that word with an absolute passion. "You Purebloods seriously need to learn some manners if you can easily go around saying such shit as readily as you girls do!"
"Filth like you can't compare to our prestigious upbringing!" Pansy hissed, stomping loudly towards me. I let her get closer and closer to me until she was right in my face, watching her hands and the way her dark brown eyes seemed almost black in the weak lighting the torches gave off around us. Having my wand in my hand and ready to go didn't seem to faze her at all. I mentally sneered. Stupid bitch. "People like you shouldn't even be allowed into the school with your magic stealing ways!"
I'd heard enough. "Get out of my face, Parkinson," I said lowly, full on glaring at her. I very rarely got truly angry, but Hailey once compared my real anger to a volcano. It was quietly simmering beneath the surface, seeming almost nonexistent until one day, something just set me off and I blew up. I knew I was at that point and it was time to leave to cool down, but Pansy was making that very hard with her persistence to push me for answers I didn't have for her.
"I don't have to do anything you say," Pansy said just as dangerously. A whole thread of my patience snapped within me and I tried to take a discreetly deep breath to stay calm.
"Get back, Puginson," I insulted, hoping the insult would at least cause her to lean back at the wretched nickname that she hated so much. It didn't.
"I don't want to," She said in a normal voice, fury burning in her eyes. She hated how I was ordering her around. Another thread snapped.
"Get away from me, Puginson," I snarled in a louder voice, sliding my wand back up my sleeve so my hand would be free and raised both my arms and shoved Pansy back at step.
She immediately shoved me back angrily. "Disgusting Mudblood, how dare you touch me with your dirty hands!" That last thread gave a resounding snap. I reacted instinctively.
Everything came surging forward. The stress I was feeling with all of my assignments in my classes despite how well I've been able to keep up with everything. The restless nights of little to sleep. The Defense group being formed. My confusing feelings for Fred and George. Worrying about my parents and my sister and Echo. The anger that was just resting within me that was directed at myself. The prospect of Finny getting hurt. Concern for Terra and her obvious decline in health as she worries herself sick over something I wasn't privy to.
All of it came forward and seemed to settle over the rational and common sense part of my brain, blanketing it in a cloud of red. Anger and frustration and irritation led me into moving. I didn't stop my fist from lashing out in a sharp arc and nailing Pansy in the cheek, snapping her head sharply to the side, and I found that I didn't really care for stopping the violent motion to another student.
Part of me was impressed with how Pansy instantly retaliated, cheek reddening, her lip split, and snarling like an animal as she lashed back at me. While I was never trained properly how to fight, my Father had at least given me some ideas and taught me some basics on how to punch someone and how to defend myself if I was being attacked. How to curl my fingers so I wouldn't break my thumb punching someone. Where to settle my weight and how it should be distributed. How to twist my hips to add more weight and speed to a punch.
All of that disappeared when Pansy tried to hit me back.
"Pansy!"
"Stop it, you two!" That was Tracey, sounding horrified. Why she would be horrified was beyond me.
Everything my Father had shown me went flying out the imaginary window. Pansy's fists and my own were a flurry of limbs as we hit and scratched and screeched incoherently at each other. This was purely what a girl fight felt like to me. Dirty and without technique or skill or comprehension of where to hit to cause the most damage. Fingers tried curling around the long strands of hair that fell freely down my back and I retaliated with yanking Pansy's once flawless ponytail.
Knees became involved. One of us tripped the other and suddenly we were both on the floor, Pansy on top of me and trying to furiously scratch long and sharp nails at my face. I grabbed her wrists tightly and rolled, shoving her away from me and landing a vindictive kick to her hip. Animalistic snarls escaped both of our lips as both of us tried to latch onto a limb.
Magic was completely forgotten between both of us as we tried to cause as much damage as we could to the other before someone undoubtedly heard our scuffle and came to separate us. A very small part of me was disappointed with Bulstrode and Davies, who hadn't once thought to use magic to freeze Pansy and I in place or to separate us somehow. Both girls were attempting to get in between us, though Pansy's flailing legs made it difficult. I vaguely realized that she had kicked Davies down to the ground and felt mild pity for the girl.
Something ripped loudly.
"Hayden!"
I ignored the voices that had shouted my name from down the hall, too focused on Pansy as she violently kicked my side and knocked the breath out of me for a second. My fingers curled desperately around the sleeves of her school robes, giving a harsh yank and causing the Slytherin to lose what little balance she had from being in a crouched position. She fell to the floor with a mighty thump.
I snarled angrily when hands underneath my armpits, pulling me off the floor and away from the scrambling form that was Pansy as she attempted to follow after me with single-minded determination. I dug my nails into the strong forearms wrapped across my collarbone, frustration welling up when they didn't release me. Bulstrode quickly managed to block Pansy's view of me, stepping into her way consistently to keep her from getting any closer to me and whoever it was that was subduing me.
My mouth flew before I could even process what it was that I was saying, trash talking the girl across from me who infuriated me to no end. "What's wrong, Pansy?! You seriously need Bulstrode of all people to stop you from finishing something?!"
"You freaking bitch!" She screeched, trying to side step around her friend and failing spectacularly. "Move, Millicent!"
"You're nothing to me, bitch, if you can't come at me properly!" I taunted relentlessly, the expletives flowing easily from my mouth. I was never one for mindless cursing like this, but it seemed to make Pansy steaming mad and that was the goal. The arms around me tightened and started to drag me backwards.
Pansy seemed to be in the same mindset. "Shut the fuck up!"
"No, bitch!" The horrible word seemed to give her new energy as she finally ducked under Bulstrode's arms and lunged for me. My legs stopped her completely, holding her back as they flailed and waved this way and that as she tried not to get kicked in the face.
"Hayden, stop it!" A voice exclaimed in my ear. Another voice echoed them, but it sounded so far away as I focused entirely on Pansy. Bulstrode eventually tired of trying to stand in Pansy's way, bodily picking the girl up and stumbling down the hall, Pansy screeching the whole way. I opened my mouth to goad Pansy some more, but a firm hand slapped itself over my mouth, stinging the skin and causing tears of pain to cloud my vision.
"Sorry, Hayden," The voice apologized, hurrying off with me still in their arms. Another set of footsteps was right behind the first as we fled the scene, leaving behind Bulstrode, Davies, and the furious Pansy.
A minute later, I was put down on my feet in front of the Fat Lady, who looked very baffled by what she was seeing. I whirled around to glare at the perpetrators. Fred and George seemed to reel back in surprise at the anger on my face. Their faces were just slightly flushed from the sprint up the staircase and their breathing was audible to me despite the two steps that separated us, me being at the top and the Twins lower than me for once.
"Why did you get in the way?" I snarled at them. They both blinked in surprise.
"You were causing a scene, Hayden!" Fred said, shocked. Blue eyes were boring deeply into mine and a part of me melted at the look that was there, but my anger held strong, stomping down the feeling relentlessly. "If we hadn't stopped you two when we did, the amount of trouble you would've been in would be exponential."
"What's your point?"
"Our point?" George asked confused. "Our point is that we just stopped you from being expelled from school for fighting in the halls with a Slytherin!"
"She has marks on her, you idiots!" I snapped. They both flinched back as if I had just slapped them. Something in me broke at the hurt looks they both sported, but my rational side didn't see it. "I'm going to be expelled the second she goes to Snape to show him her lip and the other countless bruises she's got!"
"Defend your reason for fighting back then!" Fred said, sounding thoroughly exasperated. "You didn't attack her without reason!" He paused and blue eyes seemed wary and unsure and almost worried. "You...didn't just randomly attack her, did you, Hayden?"
I rolled my eyes. "Your faith in me astounds me."
"It's not like that at all!" He sounded frustrated.
"You didn't see what we saw, Hayden," George whispered, hand reaching out to grasp mine. "You two were at each other so violently that we..."
I tore my hand from his and this time I did see the agony and hurt that flashed in his eyes. "I didn't ask for your input and I didn't ask for you interfere," I said coldly to both of them. "Next time if I want you two to come to my rescue, I'll owl you." I spun on my heel to glare at the Fat Lady, whose mouth was wide open. "Mimbulus Mimbletonia." She swung forward soundlessly. I didn't hear footsteps following after me and the portrait closed with a resounding click.
It wasn't until as I was sitting in my bed with my knees drawn up to my chest and the curtains drawn that I finally realized what I had done. All of my anger had finally bled out of me, leaving me feeling empty and cold and like absolute shit. My promise to go down to the kitchens with Terra later was at the very back of my mind, registering but ignored.
What the hell had I just done?
Twin pairs of blue eyes that were filled with such hurt and pain haunted my thoughts. Against my will, tears cascaded down my cheeks and I sluggishly cast a Silencing Charm just in case any sobs escaped me. I bit my lip harshly, scrunching my eyes closed as my heart lurched in my chest. I buried my face into my knees and stayed like that for hours until I finally fell asleep.
What the hell had I done?
Author's Note:
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SHIT. I bet none of you were expecting that. SURPRISE.
I had too much ammo for that fight, I swear. I don't know if that's good or bad, but I do and it was surprisingly very easy for me to write it out as well as I thought I did.
Unfortunately, I'm on a time restraint right now, so I can't reply to any of the reviews from last chapter, but please know that you guys are appreciated and loved and absolutely amazing for sticking around! *Hearts* You guys keep me going.
I hope you all like this new chapter! Despite the turn it took at the end. *Giggles sheepishly*
Please review review review! I treasure the encouragement that has been so kindly given so far. *More hearts*
I'll see you all next week! Thanks for reading!
~OQ