Part I
Chapter 25
You know everything about me.
Do you realize how scared that makes me?
I want to escape so badly. I want to hide from your eyes. I don't want you to see me.
Because it hurts so much when you look at me.
I feel so naked...whenever you're around.
...
You really do know everything...yet...
...you're still so blind.
Is it really...is it really...because...you're actually the good one?
The honest one?
The pure one?
And I'm...just...
...
Why?
Why does it hurt...?
It's excruciating...this pain...
...
I'm completely terrified of you.
That's why I keep running away.
So, why, then, why...why do I always...
...why do I always keep going back to you anyways?
Minamo leaned down over the table, mindlessly stirring the cup of coffee that was before her.
...well, still, it could have gone a lot worse, I guess. I mean, we had an ok time, didn't we? It wasn't like he was a jerk or anything...geez, am I at the point where I should start lowering my standards?
She took a deep sigh as her gaze wandered off to the sky, looking up past the city buildings that surrounded her as she sat in the courtyard of a small sidewalk cafe. The day was a cool August one, consisting of an unusual temperature for this time of year, but the odd weather wasn't of much concern to Minamo at the moment. Right now, her attention was still focused upon what had occurred about an hour ago, when another attempt to bring some romance into her life had quite casually fizzled out.
I don't really feel too bad about it, though. That's good at least. I mean, it was a mutual thing...
Her eyes closed, Minamo relaxing herself as she once again went over the details of the lunch date that she had just recently engaged in, the meeting a product of her mother's design.
About a year had passed since her twenty-eighth birthday had come and gone, when that tough conversation regarding her marital status had taken place with her parent. At that time, Ms. Kurosawa had not-so-subtly persuaded her daughter to become a bit more serious when it came to finally landing a husband, taking it upon herself to introduce her to a few eligible work associates as the days had gone by. The particular gentlemen that she had met today had been the latest one, someone whom she had been seeing on and off for the last week, and, while they had enjoyed some decent moments, any possibility of spending a future together had already come to an end.
When it came down to it, the intricacies of their personalities just simply hadn't meshed all that well. The guy in question had been nice enough, with a pleasant face and demeanor, but that zest that Minamo had always looked for in her relationships just wasn't there to be found. Overall, her date had been a bit of a stock character, one of those conventional business-minded, proper types, of whom seemed to blend in so easily among some of the other banal men that Minamo had gone out with in the past. It wasn't as if she had anything personal against that particular breed, but as far as carving out a lasting happiness together was concerned, he had just proved to be a bit too 'adult' to really have any sort of incredible time with.
And so, she had very politely called off any further engagements with him, Minamo having been somewhat relieved when she found that he had been planning to do the same as well, sparing her of any departing drama. Both parties had felt the lack of any real connection, and so while the dismissal itself had gone down well enough, she was still a bit disappointed from knowing that her search for true love would continue on for yet another day.
Ah, well...
She took another bite from the brownie she had ordered, washing it down with a sip of coffee. The sugar and caffeine rush helped downplay her usual post-relationship heartache somewhat, the indulgences a part of Minamo's plan in order to keep her spirits up afterwards, and a peek at her watch signaled that it was just about time to enact the next step.
She should be awake by now. But then again it's Sunday...she could be in bed until work tomorrow...
Minamo took out her phone from a pocket, her fingers going across the digital keypad.
*tap tap tap*
The text message went out, and within a few minutes, the recipient responded to it.
Yay!
She stared down at the device, grinning merrily, both her lunch date and the light spell of discouragement that she had suffered now having become completely forgotten.
What should I get us to eat when she comes over? Oh...I bet she'd love some pizza! Something out of the norm...
They traded a few more texts, Minamo finalizing the details for spending another fun evening together with her old friend Yukari. The woman had agreed to visit her place within a few hours, bringing some alcohol along with her, while Minamo herself would be providing the food, in addition to picking up a flick for them to watch during their feast.
Within another minute, everything had been set, and so after stuffing the remaining pieces of brownie into her mouth, she got out of her seat, thanked the waitress who had served her, and then began to make her way home with haste.
She placed the vacuum back into the closest, Minamo giving her apartment a quick look-over, and then felt some pride in seeing how clean and organized it all was now. Yukari would be arriving soon, and, while Minamo wasn't exactly trying to show off her sparkling abode to her, she still did genuinely enjoy providing an uncluttered atmosphere for any guest that came over.
Well...it will last like this for a little while, anyways. Before she starts drinking...
Content with everything then, she went and sat down on the couch, taking a bit of a breather as she rested, and then looked over at the entrance way in surprise as a knock sounded from it.
Whoa! She's kind of early. Must be pretty hungry...
A smile lit her face, Minamo tossing a quick glance over to the boxed pizza that sat on her table, ready to be devoured, and then got up gingerly as she hurried over to the front door.
"Coming, coming!"
With excitement she undid the lock on the handle, pulling it open with eagerness.
"Hey there! You cam-"
She staggered backwards.
"What...m-...m-...?"
"Hello, Minamo." Ms. Kurosawa stepped inside without invitation, slamming the door behind her with an authority that shook the entire building. "We need to talk."