A/N: I thought about what to write here for some time... And first of all, I want to thank Kine and my dear ladyamethyst21 for defending my story. I care greatly for this story and its characters so it's a good thing to know I'm not misunderstood completely...

To Guest: I appreciate your honest opinion and that you take you time do go into the details of this story! I'd really like to discuss a few of these points by PM, maybe explain my thoughts behind them, but as it is, I can only do so here.
There is one point, in particular, I want to clarify, meaning the possibility of venereal diseases and further offspring. In chapter 4, Hiccup remembered, how Carina convinced him that 'they wouldn't need to take other precautions' because they knew each other and she was on the Pill anyway. This hints at the facts that, when with other partners, they both actually did use condoms... They might have been stupid but not that stupid...

Too Many Thoughts

Astrid

Astrid stood once more in front of the small mirror in the tiny bathroom and stared at her reflection. What a day… What a strange and chaotic day! She wasn't able to completely think through a single one of today's incidents so far, let alone all of them. Anxiously, she wrapped her arms around herself and closed her eyes, concentrating on simply breathing in and out. They would sol-

"Astrid?" a tentative voice sounded from the main room toward her and she tried to pull herself together. One thing at a time! she told herself firmly and left the bathroom. The first priority now was Lissy. The girl was frightened, that much was obvious from the tone of her voice and who could blame her. Astrid had no idea what else this day would have in store for her. She just hoped Hiccup would return soon, hopefully with good news about the girl's mother. A troubled grimace was about to creep over her face but with much effort, she held it back and put on a smile instead.

"Hey, Lissy, you're awake!" she stated the obvious when she found Lissy sitting at the edge of the bed, feet dangling and an apprehensive look in her pale blue eyes. "Sorry I wasn't here." She apologized but Lissy gave her a careful smile, reassuring her it was alright. "How are you feeling, honey? A little better now?"

"Yeah." The girl answered in a small voice. "I'm fine." She hesitated for a moment and pressed her lips together before she continued. "Do you know what happened to my Mom? Is she dead?"

Astrid stared at her, taken aback. Of course, it might be a valid question, considering the possibility of a car crash, but… but for a little girl to ask it…? But then, right from the beginning, Lissy hadn't behaved like a normal nine-years-old girl, really. She was much too calm, acted much too mature for her age and her eyes… Her eyes were…

Astrid blinked, tearing herself out of her thoughts. This was not the right time… "I don't know." She answered truthfully. "My boyfriend… erm… fiancé went to inquire after her. He should be back any minute now and with good news, hopefully."

Lissy nodded and looked down at the floor while Astrid tried to decide what to do now. After his examinations of Lissy, the doctor had confirmed that the girl wouldn't need to stay in the hospital. She was to rest and let a GP examine her head in a few days again but until then, she was allowed to leave. They had been allowed to wait here in this examination room for Lissy to rest a little but Astrid knew they couldn't stay here for much longer. The staff needed this room back for their treatment. But where should they go instead? Astrid had hoped to know more about the girl's mother's whereabouts by now, whether she would be able to care for her daughter again or whether they would have to call the youth welfare instead. But Hiccup was gone for quite some time, he really should be back any minute now.

"Come, let's get out of here," Astrid suggested and offered her hand to the girl, which she took immediately. The grasp of her small hand was surprisingly strong, maybe even desperate and Astrid hoped more than ever that this day would turn out not to end too badly for her. They left the room and Astrid waved toward one of the nurses, indicating they wouldn't need the examination room anymore.

Then she glanced around the waiting area, looking for any familiar faces. When they'd arrived at the hospital earlier, Heather and Fishlegs had decided to stay here instead of joining her and Lissy. Fishlegs hadn't cared much really but Heather had been a little irritated. Why do you care so much? She'd asked and Astrid had known no answer. Why did she care…?

The plan had been to get the girl to the casualty and to giver her over to the social workers there who were trained to deal with injured and disorientated people. What else was there for them to do anyway? They didn't know this girl, weren't responsible for her and yet… And yet, Astrid couldn't leave her all on her own with only strangers. Yes, of course, she was a stranger to her as well, but… but there was something… Something that had caught her attention and-

She tore herself away from these thoughts. NOT NOW! She mentally screamed at herself and kept herself from tearing her hair out in frustration. It would do no one any good if she lost her mind now…

She caught sight of Fishlegs who sat alone on one of the chairs, surrounded by styrofoam cups and paper bags with the logo of a local baker on them. Coffee and food… Astrid felt her stomach grumble and made her way over toward him, tugging Lissy along with her.

"Is that your fiancé?" the girl asked a little baffled and she couldn't help herself but chuckled. Fishlegs was a nice guy, but surely not what she would call appealing, either…

"No, he's just a friend." She told her. "His name is Fishlegs and he's married to Heather, you met them both already, don't you remember?" Astrid looked at her while they kept walking but the girl only frowned and shook her head. Well, she had been quite dazed earlier so it probably wasn't that much of a surprise she didn't remember everything.

"Hey, are you ready to go?" Fishlegs asked hopefully but Astrid shook her head.

"Ready, yes, but we still don't know anything about Lissy's mother. I guess we have to wait for Hiccup" She answered and eyed the steaming cups beside him. Without looking, Fishlegs grabbed one and handed it to her. She accepted it with a grateful smile and took a careful sip. It was perfect, with lots of sugar and a drop of crème but of course, Fishlegs knew how she liked her coffee, just like they all knew each other's predilections. "Where's Heather by the way?" She asked while Fishlegs offered another cup to Lissy. It was clearly visible labeled as hot chocolate and after one estimating glance at him, the girl took the cup without further hesitation.

"She went after Hiccup," Fishlegs answered nonchalantly but Astrid saw the tension around his mouth and frowned. She couldn't read Fishlegs as well as Hiccup but he, too, was a terrible liar. What he'd said was probably the truth but there was something else he tried to hide. For a moment, she considered inquiring after it but decided against it. She had enough on her mind already and didn't want to additionally worry about whatever bothered him as well.

"Let's hope then, that they return soon," she said, took one of the paper bags and sat down beside Fishlegs. It contained two buns and she offered one of them to Lissy before she bit into the other. She really was hungry.

They sat like that for several minutes, chewing and sipping and without doing much talking at all and Astrid used the break to try and settle her mind. Finally, outside the examination room, the things on her mind began to become a little clearer. Being in one of these rooms again… it had dazed her, with emotional flashbacks throwing her already overstrained mind into even more chaos. Yes, Lissy was still the first priority, for now at least. Until they found her mother, the girl had no one to look after her and although Astrid knew it wasn't her responsibility, she still wanted to help her. But aside from what the immediate future would bring for the girl, there were two other questions that bothered her. Two other problems and she couldn't decide which one was more pressing. She wrapped her arms around herself again, feeling helpless for a moment. She just wished, Hiccup would already be here again for she really could use the reassurance of his arms around her right now.

"Can't we go and look for you friends?" Lissy asked out of the blue, her barely nibbled at bun still in her hands.

"That wouldn't be wise!" Fishlegs answered before Astrid could even think about it. "I have no idea where exactly they went and this hospital is huge! We would never be able to find them and would only miss them when they come back here" He explained further and Lissy nodded, the logic of that obviously winning her over. Astrid threw her another measuring glance. Not the typical nine-year-old at all…

To distract herself, Astrid reached for another one of the paper bags on the small table in front of them, hoping to find another one of those hot cross buns when she heard the voice.

"I sincerely hope there's still one left for me, for your own good!" Heather said as she entered the room, only slight amusement on her face. There was also some kind of stress beneath her casual façade and Astrid began to wonder what it was today, that made everyone edgy like this. But behind Heather, Hiccup entered the room as well and Astrid was out of her seat and at his side in no time, arms wrapped around his chest and her face buried in his neck, inhaling his scent deeply. She'd missed him even though hardly an hour had passed since he left the examination room. And the same seemed to go for him as well because he wrapped his arms around her just as tightly and she even felt him shuddering slightly. They really needed some alone time, to talk and to calm each other down after the last busy weeks, but now was not the time.

"Did you find my Mom?" sounded a voice from behind her and Astrid flinched. For a moment, she'd forgotten the girl. She retreated and looked up at Hiccup, the same question in her eyes as well. He nodded but with a troubled expression and swallowed once before he answered, his gaze flickering between her and the girl behind her.

"Carina Johnson got admitted a few hours ago already." He said with a hoarse voice and it took Astrid a moment to understand who that was supposed to be.

"That's my mom…" Lissy confirmed. So, her last name was Johnson? They hadn't gotten that much information out of her earlier but this would surely help later. "How is she?" Lissy continued and added after a short pause. "Is she dead?" Hiccup looked just as taken aback by this question as she had been herself. She also noticed a strange mixture of other emotions crossing his face before he caught himself again. There was hope, relief, guilt, and some others as well she couldn't quite name right now.

"No, she's not." He said, calm and deliberate, face expressionless again but she felt his hands trembling on her shoulders. "She's in the ICU and is still unconscious. You can visit her, though." He added toward Lissy directly and Astrid's heart sank. If Lissy's mother was unconscious there was no way she would be able to leave the hospital today. So they really had to call the youth farewell after all.

"Then you three go and visit Lissy's mother" Heather suggested and Astrid nodded.

"You won't come with us?" she asked, turning toward Heather and Fishlegs and the black haired woman shook her head.

"We still have a few things to do at the lair…" she explained, trailing off at the end and Astrid frowned. There it was again, this strange strained trace in the tone of her voice, barely noticeable except…

"Can we go right away? I'm not hungry, really! Please?" Lissy asked and Astrid nodded, distracted.

"Uhm… yes, of course. I just…" she went back to the table to get her cup of coffee and her small black backpack but frowned, when she couldn't remember where she'd put it.

"Here" Heather held it up, reminding her, that she'd left it with them when she'd accompanied Lissy into the examination room.

"Ah, thanks." She made the few steps toward her friend and reached for the small leather bag but Heather didn't let go of it immediately, trying to catch her attention.

"Do you have a moment?" she asked in a low voice as to not draw everyone's attention. Lissy was distracted as she'd approached Hiccup for more information about her mother and apparently, Heather wanted it to stay that way.

"Sure!" Astrid answered in a likewise low voice. "What's up?"

Heather looked at her, lips pressed together, as if she was searching for something and then just shook her head slightly. "I called at T's earlier to cancel our appointment. He made an exception for you and we can come over tomorrow instead. Do you think you'll find time for it then?"

Astrid's eyes widened at that and she pressed one hand over her mouth. She had forgotten… She had completely forgotten that she'd had an appointment, an important one! How could she have forgotten that? This morning, she'd been so eager, so… But so much had happened.

"Thank you!" she whispered, overly grateful once again to have a friend like Heather. "Tomorrow, I will have the time, no matter what!" she promised and Heather nodded, slightly frowning though.

"What is it anyway, Astrid?" she asked with a concerned voice. "Why is she so important to you?"

Astrid looked away, biting her lower lip. This was not a topic she wanted to think about now. But Heather wouldn't let go of it until she had an answer. "I don't know, really" She admitted. That much at least was true. "I just… There's something about her, something… I can't even name it! Something calling to me, I guess. I just want to protect her." Heather looked at her for a moment longer and then nodded again.

"I see…" She said and Astrid hugged her, to let her know just how grateful she was. She wanted to turn toward Hiccup and Lissy then but once again, Heather refused to let got, of her this time.

"Give him some time" she whispered into her ear, so as not even Fishlegs could hear her. Astrid froze, not comprehending, really. There was only one possible meaning to these words obviously, but… Heather retreated to look her in the eyes again, gauging her unspoken answer and Astrid blinked, once. Of course, she would. She always did and nothing would ever change that.

Astrid was sure they gave a strange picture, the way they walked along the corridors, but she didn't care, really. She held Lissy on her one hand, the girl clinging to her once again and Hiccup on her other. She would have liked it more to wrap her arm around his waist and for him to lay his arm on her shoulders but that would be awkward with Lissy at their side so they'd settled on simply holding hands. Not enough, but better than nothing.

She suspected there would be another article tomorrow waiting for them as the gossipers really lurked everywhere, and probably not one she would like, but even that didn't matter. Not anymore! She'd read a lot of disturbing articles as people had begun to dig out Hiccup's past and hers as well. About Hiccup's accident, about how violent she got sometimes (It had been only one broken arm, for Odin's sake!) and about quite a lot of women and a few men as well who'd claimed to be their exes. And yet, these people didn't seem to understand. More than once, there had been voices that had predicted for their relationship to be over after the revelation of these or those horrendous facts but they still couldn't see it… There were no secrets between Hiccup and her. There was nothing, they wouldn't trust the other one with. Sometimes a topic hadn't come up until an article or something else brought it to their attention, just like that rather delicate part of Hiccup's past a few weeks ago, but still, what did it matter? They could talk about everything. They both had a life during the years they spent apart. And if Heather knew something without freaking out herself and thought Hiccup would need a little more time before he could talk to her about it then she was fine with that. Because the same went for her as well… She, too, needed a little more time…

She squeezed his hand and for just a moment, rested her head against his shoulder as they walked. He squeezed her right back and she smiled. Whatever life threw at them, together they would always be able to handle it, no matter what.

Astrid and Lissy sat in the waiting area of the ICU while Hiccup talked to the nurse in the office. It was a good thing they knew him so well, she thought bitterly, or else they probably wouldn't get any information. They'd believed him when he'd said Lissy was Carina Johnson's daughter so there was at least this one point where they had no problems today.

And now, they waited for him to do the paperwork and Astrid couldn't help but feel awful. Sure, this was not the ER but it was close. It had the same aura of urgency and the same scent of pain and detergent and doing nothing but sitting and waiting brought forth the memories of these dreadful hours in the ER almost exactly two years ago.

It's long since over! She reminded herself firmly, but that only helped so much. She felt sick and frightened all over again. Seeing Hiccup then for the first time after he'd been so close to actually dying… the image had burned itself into her memories and this environment only helped to dig it all out again. Would Lissy's mother, this Carina Johnson, look equally broken? Would this memory haunt the girl just like Astrid's did, too? She hoped not! A shiver ran down her spine and she wrapped her arms around herself once again.

She felt a warm hand on her neck then and relaxed instantly due to his familiar touch. Everything would be alright – somehow… Somehow everything would work out…

"You'll never guess in which room she is…" Hiccup said with a humorless laughter and Lissy, who hadn't noticed his arrival, whirled around, startled. Astrid closed her eyes, enjoying the light massage he administered to her neck, before she, too, turned toward him.

"Yours?" she guessed and he nodded with a grimace. Of course, it wasn't his room, really, but he'd spend enough months of his life there anyway.

"Then let's get going!" she said and stood up, offering her hand to Lissy again. The girl took it and hurried toward the exit but paused again when Astrid didn't follow her and looked questioningly at Hiccup instead. He'd gritted his teeth for a moment and then had cleared his throat without making any move to leave the room with them. "What is it?" Astrid asked, worried. Gods, this day was crazy! She needed to talk to him in private, not just about her problems but about his as well, as they obviously occupied his mind greatly. But now was not the time. Lissy was tugging impatiently at her arm and Hiccup noticed that, too. He gave her a pained look and whatever he might have wanted to say stayed unspoken for now.

"I'll go and see if I can find a doctor." He said in a strained voice. "I'll try to get some information about her state of health and meet you there then."

Astrid nodded and reached out for him to squeeze his hand briefly before they parted again. "Okay," she breathed and was a little angry at the pathetic sound of her voice. Eventually, even this day would come to an end and she couldn't wait to drift off into sleep in the safety of his arms. She followed Lissy then into the corridor and led the way toward the treatment room she, too, had spent a lot of time in two years ago. The second it was clear to which door they were heading, Lissy let go of her hand and darted forward, opened the door without knocking first and disappeared inside. After taking a last deep breath, Astrid followed her.

Entering the room again now was… strange. Astrid knew it wouldn't be Hiccup lying on the bed, connected to tubes and wires, knew he was somewhere out in the corridors, safe and sound. But this knowledge didn't help at all, not in that moment at least. Her heart pounded painfully against her ribcage as she entered the room as well and her eyes darted toward the figure lying on the bed.

The first thing Astrid noticed was how frail she was. Lissy's mother looked even more fragile and breakable than Hiccup when he'd been in her place, although this might not be because of today's events. This was different, somehow. Hiccup had been on the brink of death and somehow this had been visible. But this Carina Johnson? She hadn't been there today. She obviously was injured, one arm and leg were plastered, a bandage around her head and one around her upper body as well from what she could see, but this cold shadow that had loomed over Hiccup wasn't there. Instead, she looked like she'd been sick before as well, the shape of her bones clearly visible beneath the skin with hardly any fat and barely any muscles to cover them. But aside from all this, she didn't look too bad. As much as one could say this about an unconscious person covered with scratches…

The second thing Astrid noticed then was Lissy. The girl stood one step away from the bed and looked at her mother and although Astrid couldn't see her face, her reaction was not what she would have expected. She would have expected Lissy to cry out, scared and worried for her mother, would have expected to see tears running down her cheeks or hear her sobs but nothing the like happened. She just stood there and watched. Astrid walked closer toward and a little around her to better be able to see her reaction. The girl's face had a pained expression but it was far from what Astrid herself would have looked like if she'd found her mother like that. And beneath the pain and worries, there was a calculating look on Lissy's face as well. Her gaze wandered over her mother's body, registered the injuries there and went on toward the machines around the bed. Astrid wasn't sure what she's was looking for but after an additional minute of scrutiny, Lissy seemed satisfied. She made the last step toward the bed, sat down on its edge and began to talk to her unconscious mother in a low voice.

Astrid stared at her, bewildered. The girl seemed not very bothered by her mother's condition and maybe she truly wasn't as much. Astrid stepped back to where her most dreaded chair stood and sat down, giving Lissy and her mother as much privacy as possible. Carina Johnson really did look sick and combined with her daughter's strange behavior… This obviously wasn't the first time, the girl saw her mother lying in a hospital's bed, even seemed to know how best to cope with this situation. Astrid heard her saying her own name once or twice as the girl told her mother about what had happened today and relaxed slightly. At least Lissy obviously wouldn't be traumatized by today's events. Highly relieved by this and maybe thrown back in time by sitting in this room, in this very chair again, Astrid dozed off, Lissy's low murmur settling her thoughts for now.

She was startled awake again when the door opened and a surprisingly huge amount of people entered the room. The first one was a doctor. She recognized him with his youthful appearance, the blond hair, and admittedly incredibly good looks but barely remember his name. Dr. C? It had never really mattered… Behind him, two nurses entered the room as well, followed by another woman in a businesslike suit and Hiccup to be the last of this group. Her eyes were glued to him as he looked even tenser than before. Being in this room again must be taking its toll on him even more than on her. She got up and walked toward him while the rest of his group turned their attention to Lissy. Maybe she should have done so as well, should have supported the girl with all these strangers around her but somehow she got the impression that the girl would be able to handle this situation. Far better at least than Hiccup.

His wide eyes were fixed on the woman lying on the bed, he went pale and Astrid could see how his breathing sped up. Concerned, she reached for his hand and his closed around hers instantly, squeezing tightly and she almost winced as his grip actually hurt a little. She stepped even closer toward him, wrapped her other arm around his torso and leaned her head against his shoulder.

"Shh," she tried to soothe him, feeling a little stupid to treat him like a child. But then sometimes that was the only way to reach him and today was no different. He huffed and wrapped his free arm around her, more or less crushing her against his chest in his desperate attempt to hold her close. She felt him trembling again and tried to keep her own worries locked up tightly to better be able to help him cope with his first. Hopefully, soon all this would be over.

While they stood there in their tight embrace, Astrid became aware of the conversation the other people in this room had. It was a chaotic jumble of different topics really and it took her a minute before she could follow again. Apparently, the nurses were doing their routine check-up while Dr. C. alternated between asking them questions and telling Lissy about her mother's state of health. He might have been reluctant to tell all this to a nine-years-old girl but she was asking so many detailed questions that he probably had stopped worrying about that. As it seemed, Carina Johnson had two cracked ribs, partial fractures in her left arm and leg and had had internal bleedings, that were already taken care of. None of her injuries were lethal but she needed to stay in intensive care for a while. At that point, the woman in the suit joined their conversation. Belatedly, Astrid realized that she belonged to the youth farewell, that apparently the internal channels had worked properly for once and someone had already called for them when it had become known that here was a child without parental supervision.

This was good… This woman would know what to do with Lissy, would know where she could stay as long as her mother had to remain in the hospital. Maybe there were some nice foster parents who could take her in until then, so hopefully, she wouldn't have to stay in some clinical children's home. Astrid's heart sank at these thoughts and she threw Lissy a concerned glance. The girl didn't look very happy, as the woman kept talking. If she really was used to her mother being in the hospital then she probably was also used to being cared for by the youth farewell. And it didn't seem to be something she was looking forward to. She looked down at the floor and nodded her defeated acceptance to whatever the woman offered her. The sight was heartbreaking…

Astrid joined their conversation then without thinking about it. Maybe she should have done so first. Right now was really not a good time and she surely should have asked Hiccup's opinion about it at least. In hindsight, these were valid points she should have considered. But none of them occurred to her in that moment.

"She can stay with us!" Astrid threw in and got a surprised look by the woman in her suit while Lissy beamed at her. Hiccup, however, made only a desperate and somehow strangled noise.

I'll try be a little faster with the next chapter... But as always, I'd like to know your thoughts about this one ;)