Part III

Chapter 61

Eiko always thoroughly enjoyed the astounded look on a visitor's face whenever they entered her apartment. Even her old friend Minamo, who had come here before, still produced that amusing reaction as she stepped inside her host's lair.

"Come on in."

Minamo shuffled in silently, Eiko holding the door open. Before them was a gigantic cavern of an apartment, one of whose size rivaled that of the average suburban home. Tall, crystal clear windows aligned one side of it, the city lights twinkling below them from the story that they were located on. The furniture and decorations were of the most expensive brands as well, all of it of modern taste, and came together beautifully to form a slick, modern abode. Between it all were novelties of various kinds to top things off: souvenirs from Eiko's worldly travels, statues and figurines, various electronic devices, and, of course, a much-larger-than-needed flat screen television.

What truly always surprised her visitors, though, was the alluring ambiance of the place. Eiko had always been a creature of the night, and so, the lighting of her apartment was set to reflect that aspect of herself. Day or night, the soft, orange lights she had installed about the place were always set low, making her apartment look more like a late-night cafe than someone's home. To further accentuate that atmosphere, she had also installed speakers that weaved a constant stream of soft lounge music, her favorite kind of tune, whether she was present or not.

Her home, then, was essentially another extension of her overall style, another piece of wardrobe that spoke to both her personality and the amount of money she had to show off that personality. She spared no expense in setting up her home, keeping it clean, and, most of all, keeping it interesting.

"Let me take your things, Minamo. I'm going to set you up in the guest room, alright?"

Minamo didn't answer, still caught in awe as she slowly remembered everything from her last visit some time ago. She was currently staring at a decked-out bar near the kitchen, of which a giant fish tank sat over. She was soon broken out of her reverie, however, as a shadow jumped out from the subtle darkness.

"Oh, hello there, Nyx'ie."

The small wraith had startled Minamo, who, after finally recognizing what it was as it jumped to her friend, managed a quick smile. "H-hello..."

In Eiko's arms now was a cat, black as the night, yellow marbles for eyes. She scratched its head playfully, then presented the creature up to her friend. "It's been quite a while since you've seen her. But, she still remembers you, see?"

Minamo hesitated, and then gradually touched the cat's head, soft purrs greeting her in return. "...h-hi, N-ixe...? Nyx? ...how are you...?"

Eiko chuckled, both from Minamo's obtuse pronunciation of the cat's name, as well as the awkwardness she showed in handling it. Her friend loved animals, but cats weren't quite her thing, Minamo a definite dog person. Eiko, though, adored felines, that feral independence always so utterly captivating to her. She scratched her child's soft fur. "Where's your 'sister'?"

Another cat suddenly appeared at her feet, a beautiful Russian Blue.

"Oh, there you are, Meddie'. Do you remember you auntie here?"

Minamo eyed the sleek animal as it rubbed against her legs, adoring its silver-blue coat. "...hello! Um, what was her full name again...?"

"Medea."

Her friend butchered this pronunciation as well. "...from a book, right?"

"Both of their names are from Greek mythology. Nyx is the aspect of the night, and Medea was a sorceress that murdered on a whim, even her own children."

Minamo's faltering smile showed how obviously perturbed she was by the information. "...r-right..."

Eiko grinned with delight. "Here, hold Nyx'ie while I take your things."

The cat took right to Minamo's arms, and so, Eiko carried her friend's belongings as she led her to a large guest room. It was furnished much in the same way as the rest of the apartment. And, as Eiko always wanted her guests to feel completely taken care of, an enormous flat screen and some various digital gadgets were around to use as well. "Now, I want you to make yourself perfectly at home, Minamo. I have plenty of food in the fridge as well, so take whatever you like."

Minamo watched on as her host set her things down upon a large, lavish bed, both of the cats quickly pouncing upon the bags to inspect them. "...ok."

Eiko glanced over at her friend, who seemed quite nervous as she just stood there. "Feel free to use the dressers and closet here in any way you want, too. You know you have your own bathroom and shower here, right?" Eiko walked to her, and then patted her shoulder reassuringly. "...alright, I'm going to take a quick shower myself. Settle in here, ok? Or, just do whatever you like in the living room. Nyx'ie and Meddie' will take care of you."

"...ok."

Eiko smiled, and then made her way into her own master bedroom. Without wasting too much time, she enjoyed a cool shower, and then donned on some loose-fitting, designer silk pajamas. After making sure her hair was dry, she then entered back into the living room, finding Minamo sitting down on one of the plush couches there as the two cats vied for her attention. "Are you hungry, Minamo? I was going to order something for tonight. Or, you can just grab anything you want from the fridge."

"...I'm not very hungry."

"Well, I'm in the mood for something Western. Some pizza?"

Minamo just frowned.

...she's probably thinking about what to tell me.

"Alright, pizza it is, then."

Her phone was instantly in hand, and within a few minutes, Eiko had placed her order. She then walked over to her lavish bar. "Let me get you something to drink. I have a few nice wines that are low in alcohol. I'll pour you one."

"...ok."

Eiko had already started filling a glass before her friend had even responded, pouring into it a nice zinfandel that was perfect for light-weight like Minamo. For herself, she poured one of her favorite burgandys. She then took the drinks over to where Minamo sat, setting her guest's down on a glass table that was placed between the living room furniture. Eiko then sat down across from her on another plush couch and immediately began to enjoy her drink. "Try it, Minamo. You'll like it."

Minamo stared at the glass before her. "...Eiko..."

"Yes?"

The cats were encircling their guest, wondering at her. All the while, Minamo absently patted their heads here and there. "...why did you bring me here?"

"Because I'm worried about you."

"You never worry about anything."

Eiko smiled. "I do worry about my friends and their situations, you know. And, right now, I don't trust you to be alone by yourself in that stale little apartment of yours."

The comment got a bit of animation out from Minamo. "...why wouldn't you?"

"Really, Minamo, what would you be doing now if you weren't here? You'd just be sulking in your apartment, doing your best to avoid everyone and anything that reminded you of the little mess that you've made." Eiko shrugged. "And, in that state, well, you might even do something quite regrettable."

"...what does that mean?"

"You do know that your student was, is, worried about you as well, right?"

The mention of her pupil set her about in a gloom.

"You know why she's worried, outside of this whole ordeal with Yukari?"

"...why?"

"Well, she's somehow gotten the idea that you were planning on doing something rash to yourself."

"What...?"

"That you were going to, oh, I don't know...hurt yourself."

Minamo's eyes widened with surprise. "...wh-what? No...I..." She shook her head with confusion, becoming lively again, and the cats eyed her flailing bangs. "...why would she think that? Just because..." She sighed. "...maybe...oh, I must have appeared so pathetic to her...I must have just looked so terrible and desperate..."

Eiko shook her head. "No, it wasn't because of how you appeared, or how you were feeling. You told her that you were going to do something, or, at least, that something was going to happen."

Her friend gazed at her with a genuine perplexity.

"Did you tell her that you were going to die?"

"...excuse me...?"

She took a sip from her glass. "Do you rrecall saying something like that?"

Minamo stared at her blankly for a few moments, as if her brain had gone on hold while frantically searching its memory. "...I don't...think so...?"

Eiko sighed. "There's no reason for Kagura to make up a statement like that. I'm sure you must have said something along that line to her."

"...I don't remember. I really don't." Minamo stared down at the floor. "...she really thought that I was going to do something like that? Oh...I can't believe that I put her through all of this..."

"She's a mature girl. I'm sure she handled it fine internally."

Minamo clasped her head with increasing worry. "...no...it's not right..."

Eiko shooed away the current topic with a hand. "Set that aside for now, Minamo. The fact is that you were becoming delirious in that small little apartment of yours. That's why you're here, so that I can watch over you until this whole mess has passed." She tipped her glass towards her. "So, that means that you're staying here until I decide that you're sane enough to be on your own again."

Her friend didn't bother with a response.

"Do you understand that?"

"...yes."

"Good. By the way..." Another sip. "...one of my friends will be coming to watch you while I'm at the office. She's a nurse."

Minamo's head immediately snapped up in alarm, startling the cats.

Eiko spoke with some weariness in her voice. "...she's a very good friend of mine, Minamo. I've already informed her as to what's going on with you."

A panic washed over Minamo's eyes. "...you mean...you told her?"

She nodded. "Yes, I told her that you were gay, and are basically struggling with the fact. But, don't worry: I've known her since college, and she's one of my most trusted friends. She'll keep your sexuality a complete secret. She's just going to be here to examine your mental health."

Minamo's jaw shivered, and even in the dim lighting of the apartment, Eiko could see her go pale. "...I want to go home."

"No."

Her friend continued to shiver.

...maybe that really is it, then? She just has the silly notion that healthcare professionals just share anything with anyone. Ah, maybe she's just afraid that her family will somehow find out that way? Her mother does know a lot of prominent doctors. That could be it...

Eiko waited then, allowing a few moments to go by as Minamo grew more and more agitated.

...well, now's the time then, if any. Do your thing, ladies.

She kept silent as she continued to observe her jittery friend. The soft music that played around them had now picked up a beat as the songs changed, the tempo of it bouncing of the walls.

...there we go. Good girls.

Both of her cats, having been previously content with rubbing themselves against Minamo's hands, were now rubbing their heads playfully against her thighs. Her Russian blue then hopped onto her friend's lap and began to lick its own arm nonchalantly.

Eiko just observed, tasting her drink, her arms spread over the top of the couch as she leaned back with amusement.

Minamo hadn't, at first, seemed aware of the fact that one of the cats had jumped into her lap. However, as she soon as she did, she began to slowly shake her head, as if she were attempting to will the cat off her. But, gradually, Minamo gave up, and instead started to stroke the animal along its backside.

Eiko smiled as she watched the nervousness instantly melt away from her old friend. "They really do like you."

Her friend didn't reply, outside of a faint grin.

"They always have."

She let the music fill the empty space again, satisfied that her plan had begun to properly unfurl. Eiko understood how her old friend thought, easily knowing what had to be done in order to make her feel comfortable.

You may seem the athletic extrovert, but, really, you're not much of the sort.

Outside of her own constant self doubt about her mental abilities, Minamo was actually amazingly intelligent, and Eiko knew that. Therein lay some of her problems, however, as she often spent far more time thinking and worrying about things than she should. She over-analyzed, and, when mixed with her massive amount of self-consciousness, the habit often led her to a sort of mental paralysis, her thoughts becoming stuck in a dark, deadening mud.

If left alone, Minamo would think herself to death, and Eiko knew that's what had occurred in the solitude of her bland apartment. What she needed, really, were interruptions to her negative thought processes, and that's why Eiko had decided to bring her to her own home. She would spend time with her whenever she could, her cats would definitely not leave her alone, and her friend the nurse would fill in for any remaining gaps in time.

"...listen, Minamo: we're all going to take care of you here. If I'm not here, then Nyx'ie and Meddie' will be here, and you'll like my friend. She's a very good human being, you know. You can trust her, and, you can trust me. Alright?"

Minamo remained quiet, just playing with the cats, but the tension was now clearly melting away from her body.

Eiko smiled to herself. It had been a simple plan: make Minamo feel that she would constantly have someone with her, even if the companions were just pets. She wouldn't lose herself in her thoughts then, wouldn't become paranoid, wouldn't collapse down into hysterics again.

"...ok, Eiko."

"Good girl. Oh, scratch Meddie' right under her left ear. She adores that."

Her friend followed her instructions, smiling with real delight at the results.

...I'll show her how to feed them, too. I'll make them her responsibility while I'm out. I'll find all sorts of things for her to do. If I can keep her from thinking about herself and Yukari when I'm not around, then, things should work out just fine.

Both cats were now making a meal of out of Minamo's attentions. They knew a truly kind person when they were around one, hooked to her like magnets now.

...I wouldn't be surprised if they came to like her more than they like me. In any case, maybe after all of this is done and over with, I should get Minamo a cat of her own. Or, rather, a puppy. I'm sure her landlord can be persuaded to allow one. "So, are we good with all of that, Minamo?"

"…yes."

"Good, good…"

Eiko did not immediately push for any further conversation then, instead letting the minutes pass by as the subtle beats of one of her favorite tracks filled the air. The cats continued to be all over Minamo, and Eiko continued to be all over her delicious drink. She was no light-weight like her old friend was, and was already getting set for the oncoming refill.

...take your time, Minamo. I'm certainly enjoying myself.

As she rested, an old memory slowly came back to mind. Before Minamo had gotten her own apartment, Eiko had offered her a room in her own. Her friend had politely refused of course, as she wanted to start living on her own as an adult. Eiko had respected that, but, she still had worried about the decision regardless.

...that dull little apartment. I knew you were going to go crazy in there by yourself. What do you do when you're not at work, or when Yukari or myself aren't with you? You just spend time there alone. Ah, I suppose some of that is my fault. I should have found her a place that was a bit more interesting, and, pet-friendly. If she made more money, then I could have perhaps even found her a nice home here in the city.

Eiko gave a subtle shrug.

Oh, well. It looks like she'll be fine now, at least. I have to thank Kagura again for showing up when she did. Otherwise, Minamo would have been alone for...who knows how long.

Her head fell back against the top of the couch, a smile on her face as she closed her eyes.

My, how I do love when a plan comes together, when the intangibles themselves fall so neatly into place...

"…so…"

Minamo had finally spoken again, Eiko's ears instantly perking up.

"…about…what I wanted to talk to you about…"

Eiko lazily sat back into the couch, a warm sense of well-being now slowly taking over as the burgundy began to do its work. I guess she's getting comfortable with things quite quickly. "Yes?"

"…about why Yukari is so mad…"

She listened quietly as her friend told her tale, a story that Eiko had already well figured out beforehand. Minamo, in her constant fear, had lied to Yukari after being saved by her in high school. She had lied about her sexuality, about her true feelings, and had let the charade go on for all these years.

And, all the while, Yukari had made it her mission to protect her from all the rumors and bullying that Minamo had always been tortured by. Unfortunately, she had done so in the only way she really knew how to do things at the time, which was to return rumor with rumor, bullying with bullying. Minamo's reputation got better as the gossip about her died down, while Yukari's worsened.

…and I remember that well. Really, Yukari was actually quite clever about the whole business. She managed to rough up the other kids while never really saying a word about why she was doing it. For all the teachers and other students knew, it was all because she was just a rotten kid.

"…and that's why she wants to kill me now."

Her friend had been speaking with as little emotion as possible, attempting to keep her raw guilt and other negative feelings under control. "…well, Minamo…I can understand how Yukari must be feeling. You know how sensitive she is about her friendships. But, did you never feel guilty whenever she got in trouble for you?"

"Of course I did! I...I always felt terrible. But...I was always so scared…"

"Of what?"

Minamo took her time in responding. "...what she would think of me, and, if she…ever let it out…"

"Because you never trusted her?"

The statement made Minamo cringe in her seat.

"That's what's really eating her. She doesn't give a damn about you being gay, or even you trying to lay one on her. She's just sad that you could never trust her with your biggest secret, and what that cost her."

Her friend shook her head in worry. "…I'm terrible…"

"…you should have told her the truth when she gave your letter back, Minamo. Especially when you specifically said that you wanted her to 'take care' of you. That's the event that really set everything off in motion."

Minamo's head was drooping to the ground, and she was momentarily oblivious to one of the cats pawing at her bangs.

Eiko noted that her own drink was completely empty now. "…what exactly made you say that, anyway? I know you, Minamo. You'd never intentionally use someone like that."

Her friend spent some time thinking before she finally responded. "…because I wanted her to take care of me."

"Well, obviously, since that's what you said to her."

"…no, I mean…" Her voice was quiet now. "…I can't really explain it. When she said she wanted to take care of me…I think that's when it happened."

Eiko crooked her head. "When what happened?"

"…when I fell for her."

"...ah."

"…it just felt so amazing, Eiko. This…this rowdy girl, that even the teachers couldn't control, saying that she wanted to protect me...that she would behave only for me..." Minamo sighed, her face becoming slightly flush. "…I tried so hard to forget that feeling, but…it's still so fresh after all these years. I still can't forget her face when she said that…it was so lovely…"

"…not quite love at first sight, but, damn close, eh?"

"…and then it just came out from me. I just said…that I wanted her to take care of me. It's so corny, but…it felt like I was in a story book. I've had crushes on girls before that, but, this was…so different…"

Eiko smiled. "You met your knight."

Minamo began to turn redder.

"So, are you telling me you agreed to her offer because you were blinded with love?"

"…I just wanted to live in a dream. Even for a moment...like in a story. But, now…" The color left her cheeks, a frown forcing it out. "…now…I've lost her…because I'm a coward. She hates me now, Eiko, and...she won't ever forgive me..."

Eiko sighed. "...you know, Yukari is probably mad for the exact same reason that you first fell in love with her."

Her friend gave her a puzzled look. "What do you mean?"

"You said you felt as if you were in a story book, correct? Well, that's always been Yukari's life as a whole. You know she's crazy about all those fantasy books and games and what not. She essentially found a princess of her own to save when she saw you in trouble, so to speak."

"...m-me...?"

She nodded. "Remember, this is a girl whose always had trouble making friends, more so after she started to beat up certain ones for apparently no reason. Anyway, she probably felt amazing after actually helping a good girl like you out. She did a good deed, and thought she'd made an actual, genuine friend to be with as well."

"...but...I was her friend...I am..."

Eiko put up a hand. "Let me finish: she made a friend out of a genuinely good person, that she could also protect." She smiled. "That's how she saw you, Minamo, as someone to watch over. That's why she gets so mad whenever you out-do her at something. She's supposed to be the 'adult' in your friendship, in her mind anyway. Do you understand?"

"I..." Minamo had to digest the point for a second. "...yes..."

"I'm sure she also liked you for other reasons as well, but I'm sure that was the original reason, or the biggest one anyway. She felt genuinely sorry for you when you were in trouble, I'm sure, but, saving you just also simply fulfilled that silly hero fantasy of hers. However, when she found out her 'princess' had lied to her like so many other people, well..."

Her friend's lip quivered, Minamo looking away.

"...it's not totally your fault, Minamo. Yukari's narcissism has some role in this, too. It's amplifying the sadness she feels, and she only knows how to express that with anger." Eiko shrugged. "She's mad at you, no doubt, but, I wouldn't be surprised if she's angry at herself as well. It's a bit cyclical, you know, but she might be angry about being angry, because she doesn't know what else to do."

"...how do you always...know these things...?"

"I just do." She smirked.

"...I'm so sorry, Yukari." Minamo sighed heavily then, the cats jumping away from her as she collapsed into the couch. "...I didn't...oh..." She shook her head with frustration. "...this...stupid feeling...! That's what it is...that's what it's always been! That's why I could never...say anything..."

"...yes, that's one thing we'll have to work on with you. We have to get you over that crippling self-consciousness of yours."

"…I don't…think it's really been that. It wasn't...what I meant..."

"What did you mean, then?"

Minamo considered something. "…I was afraid of Yukari discovering the truth, or anyone, really. But...it's more, of something I felt, that made me...not say anything. It…whenever I was reminded of myself, or, when I thought someone else would find out…that feeling came back. This…sick feeling…"

She raised an eyebrow. "A 'sick' feeling?"

Again, the music filled the lapse in conversation, Minamo thinking to herself. "…remember…I told you a few times...about those dreams I've had?"

"…those nightmares about bleeding?"

Minamo nodded.

"What about them?"

"…I always felt so nauseous in them, and, I would dream that my mouth was bleeding, or, worse, and that someone was killing me. But…" Minamo suddenly appeared more worried. "…I've felt it in real life, too, Eiko. That same, sick feeling…like I want to throw up…as if someone was hurting me..."

"…that just sounds like an overwhelming fear of other's opinions. Whenever you were reminded of what you were trying to hide, you then felt that fear come back."

Minamo slowly shook her head. "…no, it's… different. It always really did feel like…I was bleeding. Like I was actually bleeding, and, I swear…I could always taste it. The blood, I mean..."

"Again, that must be some psychological effect of your self-consciousness. It's just a psychosomatic response to your deepest fears."

"…it's not because I was scared. This was something else, and it always seemed so real. When I fell for Yukari…I remember, right after it happened, I felt like vomiting. I remember feeling like I was in pain…like someone was stabbing through my heart with a knife, and then, I swear I tasted and smelt it…real blood. Like it really had happened!" Minamo grimaced. "…that, more than anything, made me not want to tell anyone. I just…that feeling, I would do anything to avoid experiencing it again, Eiko. Anything. That's...I know that's why...I found it so easy to just watch her fight for me, while...still lying to her..."

Eiko wanted to doubt what her friend was telling her, but, the recollection had come out so convincingly that she held off any further criticism.

"…and now…just even thinking about it…"

To her surprise, Eiko watched as Minamo suddenly did appear as if she were going to vomit, a fatigued look now in her eyes. "…are you alright?"

Minamo simply took in a deep breath, and then, quickly swiped her mouth. She nodded when she seemed in control again, looking far healthier than she did just a few seconds ago. "...I'm ok. I'm...I won't think of it anymore for now..."

"…you're just getting worked up. Yes, let's leave all of this all alone for now, then." Eiko stood up, glass in hand. "You should take a drink of what I gave you, Minamo. There's not much alcohol in it at all. It'll calm you down. Ok?"

Her friend looked at her glass upon the table, gradually nodding towards her. Then, without too much hesitation, she picked it up and began to gently sip at it.

Eiko smiled, and then walked over to her bar. She poured herself more burgundy, and then stared at the colorful assortment of wine bottles that were neatly spread out across the counter.

…what was that? Déjà vu?

She put the glass to her lips, enjoying the taste.

…it's possible. She's told me about those dreams before, so, that's probably the source of it. But, still, this is different. When she was telling me that she actually felt as if she were bleeding and being attacked in real life, that set it off…

It was still fresh in her mind, that simple gesture, when Minamo had, perhaps out of habit, wiped her lips with her hand, as if there had actually been blood there.

…why did that gesture seem so...familiar?

She took in a slow breath, relaxing herself, before she headed back to the living room.

Ah, well. Déjà vu is a strange thing. In any case, let's forget about all of this sad business for now. Any more talk about it isn't going to be good for her, at least for now. And, anyways…I do think that it's finally the right time…

A smile crept onto her face then, a playful, devilish grin that Minamo didn't take notice of in the subtle lighting of the apartment.

…for a little fun.