"Uncle J'onn said that a new sidekick will be joining the team." M'gann said happily.
"It's probably Roy." Wally put in through a mouthful of food. Artemis didn't share his thoughts.
"I bet it's Zatanna." She said.
"We may not already know this new member," Kaldur said reasonably. Conner just grunted in agreement.
Just then the zeta tubes fired up. A moment of eager silence passed. No announcement was made, but a small boy decked out in bright colours swaggered off the platform.
"Who are you‽" Superboy demanded. The boy looked simultaneously disgusted and affronted.
"Who am I? Who are you supposed to be? Emo Superman?" the boy said mockingly.
Superboy charged him. The boy flipped over Superboy's head and landed in Kid Flash's lap. The boy moved with fluid motions to engage Aqualad and Ms. Martian. With a flick of his wrist, the boy threw three tiny objects that flew true to their marks: Superboy's back, Ms. Martian's arm, Artemis's quiver. The capsules secreted a substance that quickly hardened, rendering the three heroes immobile. The boy cuffed Kid Flash and Aqualad together with four pairs of handcuffs, and then sat down at the bar stool that Kid Flash had occupied only moments ago, with a pair of Kid Flash's granola bars and inspecting one of Aqualad's water bearers.
" 'ow do these things work?" the boy mused to himself, taking a bite of one of the energy bars.
The zeta tube fired up again, this time announcing Batman. The Dark Knight strode purposefully forward.
"Robin." He growled. The boy tore his eyes away from the Atlantean weapon.
"Hey, Boss." The boy, Robin, said with a smile.
"Return Aqualad's water bearer and release them. I will not tolerate you stealing from your teammates." Batman said sternly.
"Teammates?" Robin sputtered,"Them‽ They're untrained children!" Batman said nothing, just glared at the boy.
"My word is law. You will be on this team. That is final." Batman walked back to the zeta platform with a flourish of his cape. Robin tossed the water bearer at Kaldur's head, then three little capsules to dissolve the muck on Conner, Artemis, and M'gann, and uncuffed Wally and Kaldur. Robin slid back onto the bar stool.
"Can I have my energy bar back?" Wally asked. Robin glared at him.
"No." he said flatly, slipping the granola bar into his looked around at the tense room.
"Perhaps we should share something about ourselves, to get to know our new teammate." He said diplomatically.
Robin raised an eyebrow, sliding a pack of cigarettes from his belt and putting one in his mouth. Artemis put her hands on her hips.
"You're too young to smoke!" she declared.
"Do I look like I care?" Robin asked flatly, lighting the cigarette and taking a long drag.
"Look, 'un. I don't know you. I don't want to know you. I 'on't care what you think of me. We don't have to like 'ch other, we just have to work toget'er. So, just stay out of my way." Robin said. He jumped off the barstool, landed lightly on his toes, and sauntered to the couch. He propped his feet up on the armrest and snagged the remote. Robin flipped the tv over to the news, some Gotham channel saying something about Bruce Wayne adopting a couple of kids. Robin took another drag on the cigarette.
"So," he said, expelling smoke from his mouth, "What kinda shit do you guys even do? Bats said it's a covert ops team, but you guys are about as stealthy as a herd of water buffalo."
"Oh? Like you're a master of stealth? You're dressed like a traffic light!" Artemis said snippily.
"You regularly blow up wherever you're fighting. My fashion choices are stealthy by comparison." Robin defended.
"Is Batman your father?" M'gann asked suddenly. Robin scowled.
"No." He replied icily. His voice clipped the word short. Wally and Kaldur exchanged a glance.
"How did you meet Batman?" Kaldur asked. Robin shrugged
"Stole the tires off his car." Robin snubbed out his cigarette and tossed the butt at Wally.
"You stole the tires off the Batmobile‽" Artemis was scandalized. Robin smiled smugly.
"Yeah. We got three of 'em 'n then we got caught coming back for the fourth. I wanted to jack the 'ole thing, but J-" Robin cut himself off.
"Is something burning?" Conner asked into the silence. M'gann's eyes widened.
"My cookies!" she cried, dashing off to the kitchen. Robin sat up, peeking over the back of the couch to watch her go.
Batman sat stoically at the table, a holo-screen displaying the security camera feed from Mount Justice before him. His hands were folded in front of his mouth as he watched Robin snatch a burnt cookie from Kaldur's hand as the Atlantean went to take a bite.
"Knowing you, you're probably regretting just about every decision that's led you to this moment." Green Arrow said, coming up from behind Batman and sitting on the table next to him, "How's he doing?"
"Robin has been less than subtle about his dislike of his teammates and I fear, that, coupled with Aqualad's 'mole' revelation, it will tear this team apart." Batman confessed. Green Arrow looked thoughtful.
"It took a few missions for the team to hit their stride. Robin will warm up to them. Even if he doesn't there's still B-" Batman held up a hand, silencing Green Arrow. He turned up the volume on the holo-screen.
"Don' see why I gotta listen to Ariel anyways," Robin was saying. The rest of the team had half-surrounded him, but Robin was cool-headed in the face of their anger.
"It is imperative, as teammates, that we work together." Kaldur said, composed, but with rising ire.
"Asterous! You guys can teamwork and I go do my own thing . I don't need a bunch 'a pansy ass bi-"
"Language!" Artemis snapped. Robin glared at her.
"You don't think we should separate them?" Green Arrow asked. Batman considered it.
"No. They need to work out their differences on their own." Both Leaguers returned their attention to the holo-screen. The argument had escalated. Conner had hand around Robin's throat, pinning the smaller boy against the wall. Robin's feet kicked out weakly as he gasped for breath. Green Arrow glanced between the Dark Knight and the video feed.
"Oh, my God, Bruce!" He shouted, jumping off the table and running towards the Watchtower's zeta platform.