Also, quick heads up, most of these are gonna be pretty short.
"Hello, Frederick." Robin said to the Great Knight.
"Good day, Robin." He replied. The two sat there for a few seconds.
"So." Robin said. "Let's see your résumé. You can ride a horse and use a sword. Or a spear, whatever you want." He closed the folder. "What would you say makes you stand out from the other people who ride horses and use weapons? Or the people who ride horses but use magic? Or the people who use weapons but ride dragons? Or the people who just are fucking dragons?"
Frederick sat calmly through Robin's questions. "I believe my loyalty to the royal family makes me a valuable addition to the Shepherds."
"You mean made." Robin said. "You aren't a Shepherd anymore."
"What?!" Frederick shouted. "By whose authority?!"
"Mine." Robin replied. "Which was given to me by the Exalt."
"Oh." Frederick replied, sitting back down.
"The Exult also told me to tell you to take off your pants and twerk like a madman." Robin said.
Frederick sighed and began to take off his armor. Robin stopped him right away.
"No. No. No. Don't. You actually think Chrom told me that? Naga, Freddy, that's…" Robin tried to find a word, then sighed. "You are way too obsessed with following the rules."
"Of course." Frederick said. "Why would they be there if not to be followed?"
"No, I get SOME of the rules." Robin said. "What I mean is that you take away any leeway you would be able to give yourself to relax."
"Lissa has been teaching me to-"
"I don't want to know about your sex life, Fred!" Robin exclaimed. "Given how you seem to act around royalty, I can't imagine what happens in the bedroom between you and Lissa! Is she on top?"
"Please stop this line of questioning." Frederick said.
"You brought it up!" Robin exclaimed. "Anyway, you're still knight captain or whatever you were, but you aren't a Shepard. So get out."
Frederick sighed and began to walk out of the office.
"Wait. Frederick." Robin said.
Frederick turned around hopefully.
"Walk out of here moonwalking and holding your crouch." Robin said.
"Why would I do such a thing?!" Frederick exclaimed.
"Because I'm married to royalty." Robin replied, waving the hand with his wedding ring on it. "Now, dance monkey!"
Frederick, with tears forming in his eyes, began dancing out of the room. Robin leaned back in his chair and laughed to himself.
You'll figure out all the ships as we go along.
Next up: Sully!