...I have no idea where this came from. I've been busy with stuff, so chapter updates are kinda slow.
"...Who are you?" Robin asked. Pikachu was seated across from him, as well as a man in a suit and dark sunglasses.
"Pikachu!" Pikachu replied perkly.
"I was talking to the random guy, not you, Pikachu." Robin said.
"Pikachu!" The Pokemon puffed his cheeks.
"No need to be a smartass." Robin complained.
"There is no need to talk to my client like that." The man said.
"Client?" Robin asked.
"Indeed." The man replied. "My name is Ashlin Katchburg, and I foresee all of Mr. Chu's legal issues."
"...Ashlin Katchburg?" Robin asked. "That sounds a lot like-"
"I've been working for Mr. Chu for a long time." Katchburg replied. "Naturally, he thought it would be a 'cute' idea to name his fictional trainer after me."
"Ah, the never-aging Ash Ketchum." Robin replied.
"They had to do some horrible things to that child to keep him from aging." Katchburg commented.
"Well, I can see why Pikachu would need a lawyer." Robin commented. "He can't talk, so I bet people tried to get him to agree with things he couldn't understand."
"That's actually why he hired me to begin with." Katchburg said. " hated acting so, when they began to create a new Pokemon show, he hired me to get him out of it. He's an executive producer, but he is not required to act in the show. They hired another Pikachu to play him, so he still gets royalties."
"Let me get this straight:" Robin said. "Pikachu opted out of acting in a fake show in favor of an inter-dimensional death-match?"
"... has what most people would describe as a 'thirst for blood.'" Katchburg replied.
"Pi! Pika!" Pikachu exclaimed cheerly.
"...Right." Robin said. "Well, you wanted to meet with me, so what's up?"
"I believe we requested an audience with Master Hand?" Katchburg asked.
"Yeah, well, Master Handjob has been making me deal with all the meetings he don't want to do." Robin replied. "I take it you've met with him before?"
"Once every tournament." Katchburg confirmed. "Mr. Chu's image is worth a lot of money, and we just want to make sure it's not being tarnished in any way."
"Well, I'm one of the people in charge of hitting him, so I doubt I'm the best person to be asking about this." Robin admitted.
"We ask nothing of you but to sign this form." Katchburg said, taking out a stack of papers.
"All of those?" Robin asked.
"All you have to do is sign…" The lawyer flipped to the end of the stack. "Here."
Robin examined the paper. "I'd prefer to read it."
"Hand never read it." Katchburg replied.
"I'm not Hand." Robin replied. "Give me five minutes." He took the stack, quickly flipped through it, as if it were a flip book.
"I don't think that was enough time to actually read anything." Katchburg commented, slightly annoyed.
"Yeah, well, here's my signature." Robin said, before setting the papers on fire.
"P-Pika!" Pikachu yelped, surprised.
"What was that?!" Katchburg exclaimed, equally annoyed.
"That was me not signing that piece of crap." Robin replied. "I only had to look at one page in order to see what you were trying to pull."
"Which page?" Katchburg asked. "You burned the contract."
"...Right. Well, it was in the middle of the batch, where you tried to get Pichu back in the tournament." Robin replied. "Why would you want to add a clone of yourself?"
Katchburg looked at Robin, and slowly took off his glasses.
"...What the fuck?" Robin exclaimed.
Katchburg had small, black eyes. Robin looked at him, before it dawned on him.
"You're a Ditto!" Robin exclaimed. "...What does that have to do with any of this?"
"It was a distraction for my client to escape." Katchburg replied. Sure enough, Pikachu was nowhere to be seen.
"What was that about?" Robin asked.
"We are trying to hide the truth." Katchburg replied.
"...Well, you're doing a pretty shitty job at it." Robin commented.
"What makes you say that?" Katchburg asked.
"You literally just told me there was a secret." Robin replied. "I've barely said anything. I pointed out the Pichu thing and your entire plan goes to shambles. You're really bad at this."
"I never went to law school!" Katchburg exclaimed. "Also, I don't have a human brain, so I'm not really good at lying!"
Before Robin could respond, Katchburg melted away, disappearing from the room.
"...This is what happens when you wait nearly a month between updates." Robin commented.
"I-I'm sorry, sir! I didn't know when to stop talking!"
"Katchburg, do I look like I'm looking for excuses? I suppose it doesn't matter. We're just going to have to hope that the white-haired one's disinterest keeps him from investigating the matter."
"What if we just knock him off?"
"No! People would notice! We just have to wait. Given how crazy things can get around here, it's only a matter of time before Hand feels the need to replace Robin. When that happens, we strike!"
"Yes sir, Mr. Chu!"
I began writing it, I felt like there wasn't enough going on, so I had something thrown in from completely out of nowhere. I have an idea of how I'll wrap this up, hopefully by the inevitable Pichu chapter. It kinda reads like an improv scene.
Anyway, up next we have Luigi!