Chapter 7 Don't Call me Cute
"Corporal Wolford!"
"What?"
"Corporal Reyes Wolford, come down from that tower and tell me why you are blowing that bugle!"
"What was that Capitan? I can't hear you!"
"Corporal...ugh," Judy was impatiently stomping her foot into the dry soil of the parade grounds, a storm of dust billowing around the rabbit and her patience wearing thin at the wolf in the tower who had been blowing the bugle the past five minutes.
"Sergeant Clawhauser."
"Yes, Capitan!" the cheetah stated, wobbling to her side and saluting crisply.
"Go up there and see what Corporal Reyes is blowing that bugle about."
"Up there?" the cheetah replied with a nervous gulp and flick of his tail.
"No, he's in the galley eating some pastries," Judy muttered, pinching her nose as the bugle sounded again.
"Oh in that case, I'd be happy to get him," Clawhauser stated, smiling as he began to walk towards the galley.
Judy slapped her forehead. "Sergeant Clawhauser!" she yelled, startling the cheetah to jump. Grabbing his hat, he quickly turned and went back to Judy's side.
"Yes Capitan?" he asked, nervously glancing at the rickety ladder which led up the tower, as Corporal Wolford let out another long note from his bugle, causing Judy's ears to flatten at the screeching sound. Apparently Reyes wasn't the best bugle player under her command, but was also the only one who knew which side to blow into so it wasn't saying much.
"Go up there and tell him to stop blowing on that infernal contraption and come down."
Clawhauser gulped, then nodded. "Si...Capitan."
He slowly made his way to the ladder, putting his paws tepidly around several rungs before placing one hindpaw onto the lowest one, testing his weight against it.
"Capitan, I don't think this is the best of ideas," the cheetah stated nervously. "I am not that good with heights and this ladder seems quite weak. Maybe we could have Rhinovitch..."
"Now, Clawhauser," Judy groaned, her foot tapping increasing in speed, as well as in the dust cloud forming around her. Thankfully a light breeze was blowing from the ocean, bringing with it a salty sea breeze that dissipated the dust as fast as she could make it appear.
The Sergeant nodded, hemming and hawing as he tepidly made his way up the ladder, the wood groaning beneath his girth. About halfway up the ladder, a particularly powerful gust of wind shifted the ladder slightly, causing him to grasp onto it for dear life as he let out a low whine. Looking down at Capitan Hopps, who pointed up the ladder, he glumly nodded his head and looked up.
"Corporal Reyes Wolford, the Capitan wishes for you to stop blowing on the horn and come down from there."
The wolf looked over the edge of the tower, smiling as he saw the cheetah. "Oh, Sergeant Clawhauser, nice of you to join me." The wolf put the bugle to his lips and blew harshly, the sound blasting straight into Clawhauser's face. "What was it you said the Capitan wanted?"
"She wants you to let her know why you are blowing the horn, and to come down from there, or at least stop blowing it. Please?" The last word Clawhauser added as an afterthought. "And try not to blow it again in my face like that, it is quite loud and my ears are ringing."
"Oh, terribly sorry Sergeant." The wolf looked horrified for a moment before he strapped the bugle to a rope around his belt. "Certainly, I can come down and meet with the Capitan." The wolf lowered himself over the side of the tower, beginning to climb down as the cheetah's eyes widened.
"Not so fast, Corporal, I have to climb down first," Clawhauser yelped, climbing down the ladder as it sagged and groaned beneath the weight of both mammals. "Corporal Wolford, please not so fast!"
It took nearly a minute for both mammals to reach the ground, Judy impatiently grinding her teeth the entire time and as a crowd of soldiers formed around the tower, many laughing and pointing at the sight of Wolford's tail repeatedly smacking Clawhauser's face as both descended the ladder.
"Oh blessed earth," Clawhauser sighed as his feet touched the ground. He bent over instantly, spreading his arms to hug the dirt. "How I missed your sturdiness beneath my paws."
Judy rolled her eyes as Corporal Reyes Wolford jogged up to in front of Judy, saluting her crisply. "Capitan Hopps, what is it you wished of me." As he said it, he pulled two pieces of cotton from his ears. "Sorry, I usually put them in so I don't cause myself to go deaf from the bugle."
"Then how can you hear anyone telling you to stop, Corporal Wolford?" Judy asked, barely able to hold back her frustration.
The wolf's eyes went wide. His paw shot up as his mouth opened to speak, but then a curious gaze crossed his brows. "You know, that is a very good questions actually."
"Nevermind," Judy groaned. "Why were you blowing that bugle, Corporal."
"Oh," the wolf brightened. "I saw in the distance a group of mammals coming. It appears like a group of soldiers, with a cape buffalo leading the platoon, so I thought I'd give you a few minutes warning."
Judy's eyes widened. "Sweet cheese and crackers," she muttered, before she swiveled in place and yelled at the troops surrounding her. "Comandante Bogo is coming."
The entire parade ground went as quiet as a ghost town, the only sound being the breeze rustling the Zootopian flag at the top of the nearby flagpole. It lasted a good ten seconds before pandemonium broke loose, as a panda, Private Tseu, yelled above the crowd. "I call dibs on patrol duty before Bogo arrives!"
The yell garnered the attention of each and every soldier in the fort, and all at once, all raced towards the weapons hall, soldiers pushing and shoving to be the first to grab their gear and race away to be one of the five soldiers that were supposed to be out on evening patrol in the city.
Judy watched the chaos, her mouth slowly dropping open and her paws doing a poor job of covering it. "Oh no..." she groaned, as soldiers actually began fighting to be the first to leave the fort.
"Do not worry, Capitan," Clawhauser laughed cheerfully. "This always happens when the Comandante visits." The cheetah winced as a rhino officer sucker punched an elephant to be the first to grab all his gear and race towards the fort's only entrance and exit.
"Oh I'm worried..." Judy snarled, finally reaching her breaking point with her troops. Clawhauser heard the gentle scraping of steel on steel, and looked down to see Capitan Hopps with the most angry expression he'd seen from her since she arrived...
...and her sword drawn.
Private Rhinovitch grinned as he thundered towards the massive gate that led to the city. The past few times the Comandante had visited, he'd been able to snag patrol duty, signified by the dull orange-ish brown vest he currently wore. It was considered the best duty at the fort, as he never actually did any patrolling. All he had to do was make it out of the fort, go down a few blocks to Weidii's Pub and take as many drinks as he wanted.
Nothing that Margay could do about it if she wanted to anyways...he laughed inwardly, getting a mental picture of the small cat trying to push him out of the bar.
His attention turned to the doors of the fort, his eyes widening when he realized they were slowly being closed by Corporal Wolford and Sergeant Clawhauser. Rhinovitch barely managed to skid to a stop as they shut, a tiny grey rabbit standing between him, and the drinks he could almost feel on the tip of his tongue.
"Rabbit, why don't you get out of my way so I can do the work a real soldier does."
Capitan Hopps stood still, her sword drawn and leveled at the rhino. He chuckled as he saw the tiny sword in the bunnies paw, patting his own sword at his hip. "Nice toothpick rabbit. Now get out of the way before I act like I can't see you."
Judy's glare deepened, and for a tiny moment, a shiver of fear went through Rhinovitch's spine at the terrible gaze the rabbit was staring him down with. The two stood facing each other, as the rest of the soldiers formed a half circle around them. Neither backed down, and it appeared neither would.
Finally, the rhino snorted, breaking the silence. "You really want to challenge me, fluff."
Judy's eyes narrowed even further, her anger almost reaching its peak. "The correct designation is Capitan, Private." She twisted the sword in her paw, the blade catching the sun from the slight movement. "You'd best remember that, and if you want to remain in the army any longer, you'd almost best remember that you will do what I tell you to do, and when you're supposed to do it. Understood, Private?"
"I understand all right," the rhino snorted, pulling his sword from his sheath. The hilt itself was nearly as big as Judy was tall, and the sword itself was nearly the height of Corporal Wolford. "This cute little bunny somehow managed to find a soldier's uniform and is playing army."
Several chuckles could be heard from the gathered soldiers, egging the rhino on as he grinned.
"You will not call me cute again, Private."
The rhino's chuckles turned to hearty laughter. He leaned down to better stare at the rabbit, his shadow casting a long darkness over her. "And what is the cute little rabbit going to do about it." He reared back his head and laughed, grinning as he brought his sword in front of him. Looking down, confusion suddenly dawned on his face when he noticed the rabbit was gone.
Grunting, he went to sheath his sword. "Guess the cute little rabbit got scared and ran back to her burrow."
"Don't call me cute!"
In his entire life, there were only a few moments when Rhinovitch could remember not remembering a certain event. When he fell off a bridge in Pawterrey and forgot nearly a week of what led up to that event. At his 17th birthday when he had gotten into a bar fight and had a table smashed over his head by an elephant and ended up having to be told the story by friends to even gain a recollection of that night. Both events he shouldered with pride, as they showed off how tough he was to his friends and family. Rhinovitch wasn't one to go down without a fight it was said.
As he turned to his left, spotting the grey and blue blur of the Capitan hurtling towards his face, it would be the only thing he would remember of the previous month, as well as his name, rank, mother's maiden name and species.
A loud 'crack' sounded across the parade grounds as Judy's foot made contact with Rhinovitch's face. All the soldiers stood with gaping maws as the Capitan used the rhino's own face as a springboard to jump straight up above him. Groggy from the first assault on his face, Rhinovitch looked skyward, only to be blinded by the sun, blocking out the rabbit descending towards him.
In what would later be nicknamed the Rhino Destroyer by the soldiers in the barracks, everyone watched in awe as Judy turned mid-air, smashing first her left foot into the rhino's horn, causing a massive crack to splinter through the object, then everything went silent as a roundhouse kick with her right foot smashed straight into the side of Rhinovitch's head.
Judy landed on the ground, a small cloud of dust billowing up around her as she got to her feet, dusting off her paws and adjusting her cap as if nothing had happened. Finally looking us, she stared into the face of Rhinovitch, who had the stupidest smile plastered across his maw.
"That," Judy stated, raising her voice so that all could hear her, levelling her gaze at nearly every soldier one by one as she walked towards Rhinovitch, finally glaring down the still stupefied rhino. With a nimbleness born from being a rabbit, she leapt straight up, stopping just in front of the rhino's face and blew a puff of air at him. The crack formed in his horn fractured again, the tip breaking off as with a slowly growing groan, the rhino fell backwards, shaking the ground as he hit. Judy landed barely a second later, waving the cloud of dust and dirt away from her face.
With the shock of what had just happened still working itself through the now ice cold veins of the remaining troops, Judy coughed loudly to gain their attention. All the soldiers quickly turned to face her as she grinned.
"...is why you do not call me cute. Understood?"
At once, all the soldiers came to attention, paws and hooves snapping to salute with a volley of, "Si Capitan," following.
Judy smiled. "Good, now prepare for Comandante Bogo's arrival. Clean yourselves up and get moving, now!"
"Si Capitan!" all the soldiers said in unison, before rushing off to where each was supposed to be stationed for the day.
Judy grinned. Maybe I might be able to turn this place around after all.
AN: And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why you don't call a bunny cute. ;) Any favorite parts? Excited to see what is in store when Bogo visits? And why is he visiting?