Sorry for such a long chapter.. just couldn't stop lmao

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Chapter 27

Tobias P.O.V

I love this time of night, the time where the world is sleeping. The endless silence of night, the peace that momentarily comes over the world. All is right for just a few hours.

I sit in the rocking chair, unable to let sleep take me over. So many changes in such a short time. Sure we had our suspensions. We got in my truck yesterday morning, needing answers. But we never thought this trip would turn out this way.

Not only is Tris alive, but Uriah, and Will are both back. I can't even begin to describe the mix emotions with in me.

Uriah, my best friend's kid brother, a boy that I considered a younger brother myself, is Alive. I didn't kill him after all.

Then there is Will, although I never held his death against Tris, I know that was a heavy burden for her to bare. She struggled so much with the guilt, killing one of her best friends and leaving her other best friend partner-less. It tore her apart.

I remember for weeks, I would watch her suffer. Her nightmares tortured her back in Amity. The guilt eating her alive. She crawled into my bed at night, half asleep. I felt so helpless, she lost both her parents, her new home, and to make matter worst I almost took her life. Powerless to stop myself from beating her. Unable to control my body, I almost did the one thing that would have killed us both in the end. But her words, and her actions, were enough to wake me from the Jeanine's sim. I thought I was causing her the nightmares at the time. Fear that I would hurt her. It wasn't until Candor, that we found out it was the guilt of killing one of her best friends that was killing her slowly.

I wish she would have told me, I would have tried to help her. Everyone knew it wasn't her fault. It was her or him, and if she would have died then the sim wouldn't have been stopped.

I watched as the guilt of his death ate at her. Slowly her will to live, to think before acting was demolishing. She couldn't hold a gun, and she became reckless. It felt like she was willing to go to the other side and join those that she lost already. The thought of loosing her killed me, just as much as her guilt killed her.

Yesterday when we found Will alive... If only Tris was able to take pleasure in that moment, the same pleasure of relief that I had with Uriah. I tried to talk to Tris about it when I got back to her room. She did remember Will dating Christina but that was all she remembered. The memories that she has continues to tell her that her friends are her enemies. I didn't have the heart to tell her the truth. That she killed him during the sim.

My attention goes to the baby crib, seeing a little hand out stretched. I can't help it, I stand up go to her. Looking down at her, her little eyes open taking in the world. I reach out placing one hand under her head for support, and my other hand under her bottom, I bring her close to my chest.

"Well hello there Princess." I say in a baby tone, my body automatically starts swaying slowly left to right, right to left. "Are you getting hungry? Why don't we change your yucky diaper?" I place her back down and change her. She never makes a sound. When I'm done, I swaddle her back up. Taking her back in my arms I glance at Tris. She looks so peaceful, she is so tired. I don't have the heart to wake her. God knows what she had to put up with for months. I want her to rest, and to feel safe for bother her and Abigail.

"Let's go see if we can get you a bottle. So we don't wake up Mommie." I take Abigail to the nurse's station. My eyes spotting Jess, she looks at the little Angel in my arms who is starting to fuss.

"I'll go get a bottle for you." She says and walks away. When she comes back, she hands me the bottle with a smile.

"Thanks. What are you still doing here? Do you ever sleep?" I ask, she must been here more then twenty four hours.

"Just doing some over time, nothing really to back home to. Is Tris sleeping?" She says.

"Yea, I didn't want to wake her." I say.

"No problem, she needs her rest, her body will heal better and faster the more rest she gets. She has been through a lot." I nod agreeing with her words.

I make my way back to the room and sit back in the rocking chair. When Abigail connects with her bottle, I start to sway the chair back and forth, slow motions.

I always knew that when Tris made her jump into Dauntless, that she really jumped in my heart. That moment I saw a flash of gray falling from above my heart was no longer my own. Sitting here with my daughter in my arms, the baby that Tris and I created out of love. I feel my heart expanding, making room for both my girls. I glance at Tris, sleeping. Even though we have a lot to work out, even though she doesn't remember us... this moment, this very second is all I have hoped for the past nine months. I feel my heart whole, and beating again.

Tris P.O.V

It feels like early morning, my mind refusing to have any more sleep. My body still sore. I hear the rocking chair protesting as it rocks back and forth. I also hear a voice, it's deep but soothing. I notice the voice isn't addressing me, it's addressing and soothing Abigail.

"And that is the story about the war. Your Mommie, always so strong, brave... she always thought about how to protect others from getting hurt. She would give anything to save people that she cared about. Your Mommie is so brave, selfless, honest, smart, and kind. The world is a better place to live because of your, Mom. I can't wait to get you home. Chicago has really changed, we can take walks, go to the playground, we can even go to the fair grounds, have family picnic in Million park." He pauses, taking in a breath. "I promise Abigail, to protect you, to never hurt you, to always listen to you, always be there kiss the boo boos away, and to be there to cheer you on. My baby girl, little miracle. I thought I lost your Mommie, it broke my heart so much. Now I have both your Mommie and the best gift anyone has ever given me. I have you." He continues.

I feel like I am intruding on this conversation with Abigail. I also don't want to interrupt him speaking to her. Warm shivers are running through me, he is so good with her.

"I don't know what will happen to me and your Mommie, we have a long road little one. But I promise we both will be here with you. No matter what. I also promise to fight as hard as I can to show your Mommie that we are meant to be a family. I hope she lets me prove it to her." He sighs. I can't help but think how sincere he sounds. Part of me want to give him what he longs for, a happy family. I still do not have memories, and althoug we have the results that prove he is the father. My memories still show Eric in them. Leaving me feel guilty, and confused.

"We might need to wake her soon, I think you are getting little more hungry. What you think? Are you hungry little one?" He asks her.

Trying to play it off, I start to pretend to stir. Slowly opening my eyes trying to fake a yawn.

"Really, I know you were awake, Tris." He says chuckling.

"How?" I say.

"I just know." He says with a huge grin. "It's ok. I meant every word that you heard. I'm not going anywhere, not without a fight."

"What if... What if I never get my memories back? What if I can't be the same, Tris? What if that Tris is gone for good? Can you deal with that?" I needed to know the answer, not wanting to disappoint anyone. Can't allow any one to have their hopes up. If we are putting cards on the table, this card as to be shown too.

"We will cross that bridge when we get to it. But Tris, all memories can be made too. They start somewhere right?" He finishes with a small grin. Not sure what to say, I nod.

"Now I think our daughter is getting hungry. And I'm sorry but my nipples won't work for her." He jokes placing Abigail carefully in my arms. He turns and gets the extra baby blanket from the crib, helping me cover both me and Abigail. He then slips his hands under blanket, to help me undo the buttons on the gown. I can't help but notice how much of a gentlemen he is. It's obvious that he has seen me naked, we had sex, we conceived Abigail. Even then doesn't try to push, he understands and want me to feel comfortable around him.

"Um I don't think we will be seeing much of Christina today. Which no one can blame her! But she did say that she would come by later to help you shower or what not. Unless you feel comfortable with me helping you?" He says.

"Umm... I can wait for Christina." I say.

"That's what I thought." He admits with a small giggle.

"What time is it?" I ask the sun just starting to come up.

"It's 6:45." He says.

"Wait, did she not need to be feed at three?" I ask concern that my baby hasn't eaten since after midnight.

"Jess got me a bottle for her. You looked so tired, I was wide awake any who. I'm sorry, I hope that's ok." Anxiety written over his face waiting for my response.

"No that's fine. I understand. Thank you. You couldn't sleep?" I say.

"Just couldn't stop thinking. A lot has changed in the past twenty four hours. It's little overwhelming." He takes a breath glancing at me. "Of course in a good way." My heart flutters at his words, he has a breath taking smile. His eyes sparkling with happiness.

"Tris, I need to apologize." I say. Confusion spreads through me, not understanding why he is apologizing. "I... I never asked you about coming back to Chicago, I just assumed. I don't want you to think I'm forcing you or anything." He says.

"Your right, you never did ask... Do you still want us to come to Chicago?" I ask not sure where this is going.

"Of course, I do. I meant, I just don't want to force you, or make you feel like you don't have say in anything." I say. Just by those words I feel myself at ease. He is trying to offer me a choice, not force me.

"I know, I don't want to stay here... Abigail deserves her Daddy close by." I sigh. I watch him, he slowly sits on he edge of my bed. He slowly lifting his hand, letting one finger trace my hand that is supporting Abigail's body. He closes his eyes with a soft smile on his face. I watch him taking pleasure in the small touch that we are sharing.

"I have spare bedroom, you and Abigail can stay with me." He offers.

"I can't do that..." I begin, but he cuts me off. Placing a finger on my lips.

"Tris, I know we have a lot to figure out. I know. We will take this slow, we can figure this out together. Please! Let me prove those memories are wrong. I know, it's been a confusing twenty four hours. It's overwhelming. Please, don't let that hold you back. I'm only asking for you to try and give this family a chance. I promise no one will ever hurt you or Abigail. I will not allow that." He says, his eyes never leaving mine. They are full of tender, love, sincerely. His face pleading. My heart fluttering, from both fear and excitement.

"Christina leaves right next door, Zeke and Shauna leave on the first floor, and other friends are in the building... we will have all the support we will need." He continues. Like I need to be convinced any further. I would imagine no one can say no to him when he pleads this way.

"I'll have my own room?" I ask.

"With a lock, if that makes you feel better?" I says.

"And Abigail?" I ask.

"Well you are nursing... but we can place a crib in both rooms... or what ever. What ever makes you feel comfortable. I just want you both happy and safe. The cards are in your hands here." He says.

"Ok." I say nodding.

"Ok?" He lets a breath out, letting a huge grin appear on his face. He leans in letting his lips touch my forehead, I feel him take a deep breath at the contact. Then he releases me. The feeling of his lips, the familiar smell of him. Comforts me, I know this is right.