Author's Note: Awesome. Firstly, a word out to my reviewers of the previous chapter!

LunarAquaGirl

missylynn99

MissfitThunder

GlassyTheRosePen

pokegeek151

Thank you for the dares! I'm sorry i didn't do all of the dares, but everyone got at least one. You will all get what you wanted. :) enjoy!

Disclaimer: Eoin Colfer owns Artemis.

—•

Artemis had just one reply to Mulch's question.

"No."

Unfortunately, Juliet had to follow with, "Why not? What happened in your study?"

"Nothing," blurted Holly. "He was just telling me that...he got all his memories back. All of them."

Foaly snorted. "Yeah, but you're hiding something else."

They were gathered at fowl Manor, on Foaly's rare surface trip, because of the Butler girl's invite. She had suggested they not waste any time and play Truth or Dare. Nobody had agreed at first, but after Holly got the most embarrassing dare from Juliet and a few had seen it as an opportunity to get back at each other (this was, of course, Mulch and Foaly), the game had progressed somewhat well up to present. Myles and Beckett had been asked to go to bed when Angeline had called. She didn't, unfortunately, stay on line for long enough after Mulch's question.

Artemis sighed. "Well, I don't require Foaly's information any longer. So, I suggest we be fair and perfectly honest, and spin the bottle again. We didn't spin it to get my turn."

Mulch scowled. "Oh, fine. But this will come back to you, Mud Boy."

"I'll be prepared," said Artemis nonchalantly.

The bottle spun in the center of the coffee table for a six seconds before it landed on the space in between Mulch and Holly.

Holly shifted uncomfortably in the pink dress. Mulch was a great friend, maybe a bit noisy, but you do not want to be stuck inside a bathroom with him. It was the worst dare she could get. "Uh...so is it me or you?"

Mulch shrugged. "Dunno."

Number One clapped his hands delightedly. "This is so much fun!" he exclaimed. "Now which will it be, truth, dare, torture or kiss? Decide fast!"

Holly shot him an incredulous look. "You're enjoying this?"

"Yep!"

"Oh Frond."

Mulch scratched his chin. "Uh...how about dare? I can eat anything."

Foaly grinned. "Oh, no you don't. I dare you to go an hour without eating. Anything."

The dwarf's eyes widened in terror. "NO!"

"Oh yes, unless you'd like to stuff yourself with porcelain furniture."

Mulch immediately shut his mouth. Juliet giggled.

—

The bottle landed on Artemis.

Three fairies smirked at once. Except, Holly didn't do it wholeheartedly. She was actually worried about the issue from earlier popping up again.

I can't say truth, thought Artemis bitterly. Whyever did I agree on Foaly's conditions? Stupid centaur...

He looked at Juliet.

And that's the reason I won't survive this.

She chuckled. "Well, Arty? What will it be?"

Artemis looked at his manservant for help. Butler sighed. "Take a dare."

"No, that is a perfectly ridiculous choice."

"Artemis, you know why you can't take truth, you won't live through a torture, and as for kiss...just don't." He patted the boy's shoulder reassuringly. "As if the game isn't torture enough, eh?"

The boy nodded miserably. "Alright, Juliet. Dare."

Juliet beamed. "Okay! I dare you to..."

Minutes afterwards, Fowl Manor's roof was under danger of crashing down with loud, ear splitting rounds of laughter.

Artemis Fowl was wearing a fluffy dress.

It looked ridiculous, really. Pink frills, pink drapes, pink sleeves, pink everything. It was, if anything, thicker than the one Holly had been forced into, and that wasn't even the best part. Oh no, the best part was the fact that Juliet had put a pink bow at the back of it.

As sympathetic as Number One was, even he was laughing hard enough for tears to flow down his cheeks.

Artemis's face was an even brighter shade of pink than the dress itself. "Quiet," he muttered, to no avail, then sat down next to Holly on the sofa. At least she looked pretty in whatever Juliet had forced on her earlier. He just felt like a total idiot.

"Get on with it," muttered the former criminal mastermind. "How longer till your surface visas expire?"

—-••

The bottle landed on Number One.

"Yay!" The warlock beamed. His smile stretched wide, very wide. It was unbelievably wide. "I choose...truth."

Foaly asked him the question.

"What was the most embarrassing thing to ever happen to you?"

The warlock's grin faded just a fraction. "Must I really answer that?"

Both Artemis and Holly looked glad that they weren't the only ones on the verge of losing their dignity. "Yes," replied Foaly.

"Oh well," Number One sighed. "I was once experimenting on a swear toad, to kind of take the magic out of its system, and I made a mistake."

"What sort of mistake?"

"I might have inflated one of its eyeballs and made it grow a unicorn horn...and opened the cage on accident, which panicked it and caused it it start cursing some guinea pigs we were trying to cure of depression..."

"Depression?" exclaimed Juliet. "Guinea pigs and depression?"

"...And Qwan banned me from the butterfly garden for a week."

Artemis raised an eyebrow. "And I thought what happened to me was humiliating," he remarked with obvious sarcasm in his voice that the little warlock did not catch. Truth be told, the prodigy did not look overly threatening in the oversized fluffy pink dress he still had on.

"I know!" wailed Number One. "It was torture!"

"There, there," Juliet patted him on the arm. "It was only a week."

"It was the worst week of my life!"

Juliet left the crying imp and proceeded to spin the bottle again.

—•

Mulch.

Surprisingly, it was Butler who spoke.

"I dare you to take a bath."

The dwarf's jaw dropped open.

"With soap," added the bodyguard. "My poor nose hairs are standing on end."

Both Artemis and Holly sighed in relief. It was comical, because both of them were dressed alike and sitting beside each other.

"Smart man," said Foaly. "I should've dared him that earlier."

Juliet chuckled.

"I'll supervise," she offered, before dragging a protesting dwarf by the clean fraction of his dungarees all the way up the stairs to the bathroom. At every step, Mulch knocked his nose in a whole new place and it was basically a Jingle Bells made of only the sound "Ow".

"Ow—Ouch! Hey that hurts! Ow! Ow! Aaargh! Oww!"

Number One stopped crying and watched in amusement.

—•

Artemis wearily watched the bottle spin.

It had a chance of landing on Butler or on Holly next. And there it was, rotating on one spot, waiting to prey on the next unfortunate player it landed on.

And...Holly.

The elf rubbed her eyes. "Why is it always me?"

Juliet, who was back a drenched set of jeans (besides a Dwarf who was still soaked in the aftermath of soap bubbles) was the one to answer her question.

"Aw, fate is like that, honey. Now, which will it be?"

Holly uncomfortably adjusted the puffy sleeves of her dress. "Dare."

"Are you sure? I could get you into another pretty outfit..."

"T-Truth!"

"Ah, no, I'd ask you about...well, you know who."

The elf had turned a bright shade of red. "Torture"

"Okay, want some of Beckett's green soda mixture in your hair?"

Holly groaned. "You want me to say kiss, don't you?"

"Don't," muttered Artemis from beside her. "I don't want to lose any more dignity."

She scowled at him. "What makes you think I'll pick you?"

"Maybe the fact that I'm the only available option?"

"Not!"

"I'd like to see you try Mulch. Or Foaly. Or Number One."

"I could try Number One," protested Holly. "Don't get your head swollen."

"I dare you to."

Holly looked at Juliet. "Alright, Mud Girl. I pick the last one."

Foaly smirked. "Aw yeah! Hold on a sec, I need a camera."

"Fowl manor had cameras all around."

"I'm paranoid, I won't trust those."

"Whoa!" Holly glared at him. "Look everyone, Foaly just admitted that he's paranoid."

"This is an opportunity, Holly! I need gossip!"

"You mean gossip material?"

"Whatever! You're going to kiss Artemis!"

"I am not going to kiss Artemis!"

"Hah, I'd like to see you try Mulch. Or Butler. Or Number One."

"Aargh!"

"Just do it!"

"You're not a freaking Nike commercial to say Just do it and expect people to listen!"

"Excuse me, I love Nike! The second best thing humans invented!"

"And the first?"

"Soap operas."

"Back on the topic, I am not kissing Artemis!"

Meanwhile, everyone else simply stared at the unfolding argument before Butler decided to intervene.

"Holly," he said. "Just do it."

Holly crossed her arms. "NO. And get us out of these stupid clothes!"

"Artemis said you looked pretty in them," protested Number One. "It's a perfect opportunity."

"You too?!"

Artemis sighed.

"Holly," he said. "Postpone your dare like I did."

There was a series of protests from Juliet, Foaly and Mulch.

"That's not fair! I mean, she has to do it! We did our stuff!"

"I need office gossip! Waaaargh!"

"SO NOW YOU CAN TORTURE ONLY ME?! I USED HUMAN SOAP, FOR FROND'S SAKE! HUMAN SOAP!"

Holly ignored them and stubbornly settled back onto the couch.

—•

It was to almost everyone's delight that Juliet was the next person up for a dare. In fact, they got into an argument on who should be the one giving her a dare, with of course Number One not taking part, before it was decided that both Holly and Artemis deserved the chance more than the others.

They turned to her, smirking.

Juliet swallowed.

"Now," began Holly slyly. "Hand it over."

"Hand what over?"

"Isn't that obvious?" The elf elbowed Artemis playfully in the ribs. "Tell her."

Artemis's grin stretched further. "Your diary."

Juliet had one response.

"AAAAAAAAARRGGHHHHH!"

Which was, of course, an impossibly loud scream.

—•

"Don't worry, Juliet," Foaly faked sympathy. "We'll read only the mortally humiliating bits."

"The bookmarked pages," muttered Juliet sourly, handing Holly a regular-sized perfumed black hardcover diary. "Only those." Sure enough, some pages had been tagged in luminous sticky note strips.

"This is going to be so fun," said the elf in unhidden glee, opening up to a bookmarked page.

Author's Note: LOL YEAAAAH! *hi fives Foaly* *then goes weird and hugs Foaly* FOALEEEEE!

Okay, I know GlassyTheRosePen requested more A/H (my apologies...) but it'll be included in the next update. I swear! :D And since I haven't yet thought of what to add to Juliet's diary, it's coming next update too. Sorry, but it might not be directly after this. Chapter 13 definitely! Have patience with me :) I will work as hard as I can.

Please review, and don't kill me!